Ellie had not anticipated anything out of the ordinary that afternoon. It was just another day. Another routine walk down the same hallways with her headphones in, her music turned up loud enough to drown out the world. It was a habit now, letting the lyrics fill all the quiet spaces in her head. The ones she didn't like to leave empty for too long. She kept her gaze low, her mind somewhere else, her steps rehearsed.
It helped.
Helped her avoid the ache that sometimes stirred when she passed a particular classroom. Helped her ignore the flash of a familiar jacket in a crowd or the quiet shuffle of footsteps that once used to match hers. For months, Ellie had trained herself to move like this, distant but functional. Alive but not too present.
She told herself it was fine. She even started to believe it.
There were days when she didn't think about Astrid until night. Days when she could walk past her in the hallway and not feel her stomach twist in on itself. And then there were moments like today. Moments that caught her off guard.
She stood near the vending machines just outside the cafeteria, patting the pockets of her jacket for change. It wasn't urgent, just something to pass time before the bell. Around her, the lunch crowd buzzed with voices, laughter, the occasional screech of a dragged chair. It all blurred together, white noise that she had grown used to tuning out.
Until one voice pierced through it.
She froze.
Cloud.
Ellie didn't turn her head, but every nerve in her body seemed to tilt in his direction. His voice was distinct, warm and a little rough, always tinged with something casual and amused. He was laughing. She could tell by the sound of it.
She told herself it was nothing. Just a laugh. Just Cloud being Cloud.
But then, she heard her name.
"…Ellie, remember? From the Fall Festival?" he said to someone. "She danced the whole time in those ridiculous star earrings."
Her heart skipped.
Someone else chuckled. "Oh yeah, I remember that. Didn't she date Astrid or something?"
"Yeah," Cloud replied. "They were kind of... intense."
That word stung. Ellie stayed completely still.
"But it was obvious Astrid was never gonna stay," he added, a little quieter now. "She's not the type."
Ellie didn't know what she was expecting. But it wasn't that. It felt like something inside her went still, like a drop of water landing in a cup already too full. She stared at the vending machine, eyes unfocused. Her fingers were still in her pocket, but she'd stopped searching for coins.
The words repeated in her head even after Cloud and his friends walked away.
"She's not the type."
It wasn't cruel. It wasn't even meant for her to hear. That made it worse.
Because it was honest.
Ellie didn't remember walking away from the vending machines. One minute she was standing there, and the next she was pushing the door to the back stairwell open, the one nobody used during lunch. She sat down on the second step, the air cool and still around her.
She took out her phone, pressed pause on her music.
And then there was silence.
Not the peaceful kind. The other kind. The kind that curled up beside you and whispered every thought you didn't want to think.
Was it true?
Had she known all along that Astrid wouldn't stay?
Ellie pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her forehead on them. She wasn't crying. Not really. Just sitting there, full of something she didn't have words for. Not anger. Not sadness. Just a kind of tired that made her feel smaller than she was.
The stairwell door creaked again. She didn't look up right away.
"Ellie?"
It was Kyla's voice. Gentle. Careful.
Ellie lifted her head slowly. She must have looked a mess because Kyla's expression softened even more as she stepped closer.
"I figured I'd find you here," Kyla said, sitting down beside her without asking.
Ellie didn't speak for a while. Kyla didn't push.
Finally, Ellie said, "He was talking about me."
Kyla looked over but didn't interrupt.
"Cloud. He said Astrid was never going to stay. Like it was obvious. Like... like I was stupid for not seeing it."
Kyla leaned back against the wall, her shoulder brushing Ellie's. "You weren't stupid."
"I thought she loved me," Ellie said. Her voice cracked at the end.
"She probably did," Kyla said quietly. "But love doesn't always mean someone's going to stay."
Ellie closed her eyes.
"I hate how everything still feels so raw," she whispered. "Even now. Even after all this time."
"You don't have to hate it," Kyla said. "It just means you cared. That it mattered."
Ellie nodded, her throat tight.
They sat like that for a while. The silence wasn't so heavy this time.
After a few minutes, Ellie spoke again. "Do you think I'm easy to forget?"
Kyla turned to her, frowning. "No. God, no."
Ellie looked away.
"Hey," Kyla said, reaching for her hand. "You are one of the most unforgettable people I've ever met. And I mean that. Don't let someone else's choices make you doubt that."
Ellie's fingers curled around Kyla's slowly.
The warmth of her hand was grounding. Familiar.
"I want to let it go," Ellie said. "But it's like... part of me is still waiting for her to explain. To apologize. To look me in the eye and just say something real."
Kyla squeezed her hand. "You might never get that."
"I know," Ellie said.
"But you don't need it to move forward."
Ellie looked at her. "How do you know?"
"Because you already are," Kyla said. "Even if it doesn't feel like it. You showed up today. You got through practice. You laughed. You danced. You're still here. That matters."
Ellie exhaled slowly, something loosening in her chest.
"I want to feel like myself again," she said.
"You will," Kyla promised.
They stayed there until the bell rang. Neither of them moved right away. When they finally did, Ellie felt a little steadier on her feet.
That night, she stood in front of her mirror for a long time after brushing her teeth. She stared at her reflection, at the soft shadows under her eyes, at the way her hair curled near her ears. She touched the silver star earrings on her dresser and smiled a little.
She hadn't worn them since the Fall Festival.
Without overthinking it, she picked them up and slipped them on.
The next morning, Ellie walked into school wearing her old denim jacket, her star earrings glinting under the hallway lights. Her headphones were around her neck, music off.
She wanted to hear the world again.
Tisha spotted her first. "Look at you," she said with a grin. "Serving cosmic realness."
Ellie laughed. "Felt like the right day for stars."
"Finally," Tisha said. "I've missed this version of you."
Kyla approached with two drinks in hand. "I got you something," she said, holding out a smoothie.
Ellie accepted it. "Thanks."
Kyla tilted her head. "You okay?"
Ellie nodded. "Not pretending today."
Kyla smiled. "Good."
As they walked together to class, Ellie caught sight of Astrid at the end of the hallway. She was talking to someone, laughing. Their eyes didn't meet. This time, Ellie didn't look away.
She didn't flinch either.
It didn't mean she was over it. Or that it didn't still hurt sometimes. But it meant she was living through it. Walking through the ache instead of avoiding it. Breathing through the weight instead of letting it crush her.
That afternoon, they gathered again at the field.
The light was golden, soft and stretched across the grass like a memory.
Tisha brought speakers. Anastasia brought chips. Kyla brought a blanket.
Ellie brought herself.
She lay back, staring at the sky as it shifted to pink.
"I think I'm okay," she said aloud.
Nobody asked what she meant. Nobody needed to.
She was okay.
Not all the way. But enough.
Enough to laugh again.
Enough to love her friends.
Enough to look at herself and not feel broken.
The stars were starting to appear now.
One by one.
Just like her.