Wagner said, "If you want to open a branch, I think you could set it up right next to the flower girl's shop. That's by Mondstadt's main gate—lots of foot traffic, and plenty of people looking for food."
"I already said we don't sell food! …Wait, actually, that suggestion isn't bad at all…"
Hu Tao pondered, "Opening a funeral parlor right at the city gate—what a bold and creative move. Maybe people will be curious and come by to inquire."
Paimon muttered, "There's no way that's happening."
Zephyr wiped his forehead. "Wagner, these are the crystal ores I mined yesterday. Can you forge them into magic ore for me?"
"That's quite a haul. Give me a day. Come back tomorrow and I'll have them ready."
"Great. Also, do you happen to know any other mining spots?"
Wagner shook his head. "That, I'm not sure of. The last few locations were ones some adventurers told me about. If you're looking for that kind of info, I suggest checking with the Adventurers' Guild."
"Got it. Thanks."
After bidding Wagner farewell, the group made their way to the Adventurers' Guild.
Zephyr was a bit puzzled. "The Adventurers' Guild? Isn't it just Katheryne by herself?"
Paimon said, "That's just the reception desk for the guild. Not the whole thing."
"Oh? So you really thought this big city's entire guild was run by one person?"
"…Sorry, but yeah, I kind of did."
Honestly, past game experience had misled him again.
"Yo, Katheryne."
"Ad Astra Abyssosque. Greetings, Traveler. Are you here to take on a quest today?"
"Not really. Just stopping by to look around the guild."
"Understood." Katheryne nodded politely.
Following Paimon's lead, Zephyr headed toward a nearby three-story building.
"Cheers! Drink up!"
"Blades cut flesh, but the heart pierces the soul!"
"Even if it's a god, I'll kill it for you!"
Zephyr was a bit surprised. "The Adventurers' Guild is really lively, huh."
"Of course! Mondstadt's a big place, so there are bound to be a lot of adventurers."
However, the moment Zephyr stepped inside, the volume of the crowd noticeably dropped.
People began whispering among themselves.
"Is that the Holy Demon?"
"Looks like just some little girl to me…"
"She doesn't even have a Vision. Is she really that strong?"
"Shhh, keep it down. Who says you have to wear a Vision where people can see it? Maybe she hides it under her clothes."
"…Fair point."
Hu Tao burst out laughing. "You're more famous than I thought."
"…Are you complimenting me or mocking me?"
He glanced around. There were a lot of adventurers, but most were low-level. He didn't see any with Visions either.
Wait, you're wondering how he could tell?
A random background adventurer once said something very true: people with Visions don't necessarily wear them in plain sight—some may hide them.
But Zephyr had a flawless method of identification:
Anyone dressed flashy—especially girls—wearing very little clothing?
Guaranteed Vision holder. 100%.
Yet after scanning the room, he saw no one fitting that description.
Disappointing. He was hoping to get close to little Amy.
As they walked forward, a receptionist said, "Hello, may I help you with something?"
"Yes, I'd like to ask—"
Suddenly, a burly man with the build of a bear shoved his way over. "Hey, shrimp. Back of the line."
Paimon puffed her cheeks. "We were here first!"
"You got a problem with me, brat?"
Paimon was just about to snap back, but Zephyr quietly stepped back.
The burly man burst out laughing. "Hahaha! This is the famous Holy Demon of Mondstadt? Hahaha—what a joke!"
Paimon huffed, "That's so rude! Traveler, why did you back down?"
"Who backed down? I just didn't see the point."
"No point?"
"Look at my level and equipment, will you? If I fought this level 5 noob, I'd have to unequip my weapon. Otherwise, I might accidentally kill him with a single slash. It's too much trouble, so forget it."
"Oh, Paimon understands. Guess you got lucky this time, you dumb bear."
"Dumb bear!?"
Veins bulged on the man's forehead. "You cocky little brat! I'll show you my strength right now!"
Hu Tao clapped her hands together.
"What, you wanna step in and fight for her?"
"I just want to ask you something—have you eaten today, sir?"
"I have. So what?"
"Well, since I asked someone to help me out, I can't just hide behind them when trouble shows up. I believe in one principle: before a person dies, no matter how evil they are, they should die on a full stomach. Since you've eaten, then rest in peace. I'll pray for you. Although… funerals do come with an extra service fee."
"You—!" The man roared in fury.
"Eat well, drink well, and may your journey be smooth."
A ghostly wisp suddenly flew from the man's body and into Hu Tao's hand.
The man shuddered, feeling an icy chill. His legs gave out, and he collapsed to his knees.
"Wh-What did you do to me…"
Hu Tao grinned like a little devil. "Nothing much. I just took your soul, that's all."
The adventurers nearby gasped in shock.
"What? A soul!?"
"So souls actually… exist?"
"No way! I don't believe in this nonsense!"
Hu Tao declared proudly, "I'm sure you've already felt it—that cold, lifeless sensation? That means you've got exactly seven days left to live. In seven days, you'll die. Unless you donate 1000 Mora to the local orphanage. Then I'll return your soul. If not… well, goodbye in a week."
"N-No… I don't believe this ridiculous crap…"
"Believe it or not, I, Hu Tao—the 77th Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor—do not stoop to telling lies."
"Wangsheng Funeral Parlor?"
"What's that?"
Ahem. "Please allow me to formally introduce us. Wangsheng Funeral Parlor is a prestigious funeral service organization based in Liyue. We've just arrived in Mondstadt and plan to open a branch here. When the shop opens, there will be special promotions—20% off all services. We hope everyone signs up early."
"What! Liyue!?"
"Funeral services!?"
"She's doing funeral marketing inside the Adventurers' Guild!?"
The crowd wanted to complain—some were even angry, thinking Hu Tao was cursing them—but after seeing what happened to that burly guy, most of them didn't dare speak up.
Paimon muttered, "You really don't miss a single opportunity to advertise, huh… But wait, did you really take his soul?"
Hu Tao whispered, "Of course not. I was bluffing."
"Then what was that 'soul' just now?"
"Hehe, just a little magic trick."
Zephyr glanced at Hu Tao a couple more times, then turned to the unfazed receptionist and asked, "Excuse me, I wanted to ask—do you have any information about crystal mine locations?"
//END
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