Chapter 57: Two people arguing.
[ [ "Let's talk. So why did Subaru fight with Yuriusu? You must have had a reason, right? With Subaru's personality, there must have been something important…"
"I wanted to get revenge. I wanted him to know that I wasn't useless. That guy said I was pathetic, powerless, and a nuisance… unworthy of you. I hated that guy… That's why I accepted the challenge." ] ]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"..."
Yuriusu, outside the screen, was silent.
Did my words back then hurt Subaru too much? Should I apologize again?
No, I've already apologized twice, and Subaru has forgiven me. It wouldn't be good to apologize again.
But my words and actions at the time truly hurt him. Especially at the Sage's Tower, I personally experienced being crushed by strength and insulted.
Subaru and I back then were like… like Reinhardt and I were back then.
—
[ [ "Just for that?" Emilia looked both surprised and disappointed.
"Emilia, you wouldn't understand."
"Is that so? Roswaal and I are returning to the mansion tomorrow. And Subaru will stay in the Royal Capital to focus on your treatment."
"Huh?"
"We agreed on this from the beginning, didn't we? Anyway, Rem will also stay, so you don't have to worry about your daily life."
"Wait a minute! Why so suddenly… I…"
"Because if I were here, Subaru would push himself like that again, wouldn't he? Ever since we first met, Subaru has been like this. It was the same at the mansion. Today too, you're doing this all because you're with me, aren't you?" ] ]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Subaru…"
At that time, I turned my back to Subaru, afraid to face him directly. But now, through the screen, I could see Subaru's expression from back then.
Subaru's expression looked so hurt…
Emilia gently lowered her head.
"Ah, it feels like…"
Anastasia paused, then spoke again:
"Doesn't the relationship between Natsuki and Emilia-sama feel a bit like… mother and son?"
"Mhm…"
Otto, Garfiel, and others showed looks of agreement, crossing their arms and nodding.
In the loop at the mansion, Emilia comforted the suffering Subaru with her lap pillow like a doting mother.
Then there was Subaru's sense of relief every time he saw Emilia, and his helplessness here, as if abandoned by his mother.
—
[ [ "That's not what I meant. I just wanted to do something for you, that's why I…" Subaru anxiously tried to explain.
"For me…? It's for yourself!"
Emilia finally lost her composure and threw her vestments at him.
"Stop lying like this, saying it's all for me! I've made so many promises with you, and you haven't kept any of them. Are you saying all of this was for me? I've told you everything I wanted you to do! Haven't you broken every single promise, Subaru! Even though… we promised, you carelessly broke all our promises, and that's why you've ended up in this situation, isn't it?!" ] ]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Spirits value promises very highly. I have to say I was quite angry at the time."
Puck said.
Emilia, next to Puck, was silent.
Subaru's failure to keep his promises was certainly angering me, but what angered me the most was that he would do things that hurt him without keeping his promises.
At that time, I couldn't bear my anger, and I also thought that to prevent Subaru from getting hurt for me any further, I should say some harsh words and end our relationship here.
—
[ [ "Emilia… don't you trust me?" Subaru, asked Emilia tremblingly.
"I want to trust you… I want to believe you… But aren't you the one who won't let me believe you! You won't keep your promises with me, yet you ask me to believe you… Even if you say that, I can't…"
"..."
Emilia continued:
"Hey, Subaru. Why do you want to help me so much?"
"I want to do something for you because you saved me…"
"I… saved you?"
"Yes. I don't think you know it, but what you did for me was such a great salvation. But I… was truly saved by you." ] ]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Alas, Emilia-sama truly doesn't know, and she couldn't possibly know that she saved Natsuki-san."
Otto sighed, then continued:
"But, you know. The debt of saving a life, in a sense, disappeared at the start of the second loop. After all, Emilia-sama didn't do that thing afterwards. But even if it was to repay the favor, it should have been repaid at the cursed storehouse, where Natsuki-san blocked the surprise attack from the Bowel Hunter and protected Emilia-sama. So, saying it's about salvation or repaying a favor is mostly an excuse. The main reason is that he fell in love with Emilia-sama and wanted to work for her."
In short, Emilia on the screen didn't understand how she had saved Subaru, let alone why Subaru would go to such lengths for her.
Actually, everyone thought it would be simple to explain. Don't say things like "saved you" or "repaying a favor," as she wouldn't understand. So, Subaru just needed to be clear about his feelings and confess to Emilia, but…
—
[ [ "I don't understand! I saved Subaru? How is that possible? Because the first time I met you was at the cursed storehouse, and I couldn't have met Subaru anywhere else!"
"Even if you don't understand, please listen to me. It's true! You, when I first came to this world, you…"
Subaru suddenly stopped talking, his face contorted in pain.
The audience could tell that he had touched upon a forbidden topic again.
"You… you still won't say anything…"
"Why, why don't you understand? I… I always thought Emilia would surely understand."
"Subaru's image of me is quite something… But if you don't say it, I won't understand, Subaru." ] ]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Ah, even in such a dire situation, is lil' bro still unable to say it because of some ridiculous shame? Is it that hard to just say, 'I like you, that's why I'm asking you not to be reckless'?"
Felt was very exasperated.
"Instead of explaining the real reason, he says things the other person can't understand… Subaru really…"
Yuriusu shook his head, thinking Subaru's approach was terrible.
And yet, what was even worse was yet to come.
—
[ [ "It was all resolved perfectly because of me, wasn't it?!" Subaru roared.
Then he continued:
"In the cursed storehouse where your badge was stolen! I saved you from that incredibly dangerous murderer! I stepped forward! All of this is because you are important! It's the same with what happened at the mansion! I was bitten everywhere. I risked my life! My head was broken, I was completely blown apart, but didn't I save everyone in the village! Rem, Ram, that was surely the best outcome! That's… that's because I was there, isn't it?! If I weren't there, things would have gotten worse! No one would have been saved! It's all because I was there! You owe me a debt you can never repay in this lifetime!!"
"...Yes. So, let me repay all the favors and end it. It's enough—Natsuki Subaru." Emilia walked away step by step.
Before leaving, she softly said:
"I actually had a hope. Perhaps Subaru… perhaps Subaru wouldn't see me specially. He would see me like any other ordinary girl, like a normal person…"
"That's impossible. Only you, I couldn't possibly see you the same as anyone else." ] ]
....