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Fei Qian thus repeated the reasons he had given earlier.
Fei Min listened while nodding, praising aloud, "Nephew Ziyuan, such intentions of yours are truly commendable!" Yet inwardly, he wondered: Is this really the reason?
At Fei Min's age, having witnessed countless struggles for power and schemes of intrigue, he might have believed it if Fei Qian had come harboring some ulterior motive. But now, hearing that Fei Qian had arrived under the lofty banner of master-disciple loyalty, whether he believed it or not was secondary—his mind was already filled with a dozen skeptical questions.
Still smiling leisurely, Fei Min said, "I wonder what plans you have for the future, Nephew?"
Whatever the reason, the situation was now a fait accompli. Delving into the root cause held little immediate significance. Instead, Fei Min was far more concerned about Fei Qian's next steps—actions that might also help him deduce the true motives behind Fei Qian's previous behavior.
Fei Qian paused briefly before replying, "The current situation is chaotic and unclear. I am unsure where I should settle. Might Uncle have any wise counsel to offer?"
Fei Min chuckled and said, "Though there is some disorder, it will not last long and will soon be resolved."
Does our family head really have such confidence? Fei Qian couldn't help but feel a pang of unease. Could it be that living here for so long has limited his perspective?
Fei Qian then said, "Coming from the south, I passed by Suanzao and encountered Inspector Liu of Yanzhou, Governor Kong of Yuzhou, Prefect Zhang of Chenliu, Commandery Administrator Qiao of Dongjun, Prefect Zhang of Guangling, and Governor Bao of Jibei..."
"Oh?" Fei Min's body involuntarily leaned forward, his gaze fixed intently on Fei Qian. "Is that so? Nephew, do elaborate."
Though Fei Min showed little outward reaction, inwardly, his mind was in turmoil. This Fei Qian is far more troublesome than I initially imagined! These are all high-ranking officials—some even outrank my position as Imperial Counselor. If Fei Qian has ties with even one or two of them, this becomes a far thornier issue...
Fei Qian briefly recounted a few incidents, particularly how Liu Dai had arrived with his forces only to be undermined, how the various leaders had sworn oaths but then shifted blame onto one another, and so on.
Originally, Fei Qian had intended to use this account to highlight the infighting and buck-passing among the eastern gentry, showing Fei Min that the current situation was far from as rosy as he imagined. Yet to his surprise, Fei Min clapped his hands and sighed, "What a pity! What a pity! Nephew, how could you have stepped aside at such a moment? You should have stepped forward without hesitation!"
Fei Min was genuinely dismayed.
The Fei family had missed a golden opportunity to make a name for itself!
Taking the oath on behalf of the Yuan family would have been an immensely profitable venture. At the very least, it would have caught the Yuan family's attention, ensuring their patronage and smooth sailing in all matters thereafter.
How could Fei Qian have let such a prime opportunity slip away?
As for Fei Qian's personal safety—well...
But how could personal safety compare to the prosperity of the family?
Even if Dong Zhuo's rule were to last longer—supposing he won this war and remained in power—and Fei Qian were imprisoned or sentenced to death for this act, he would at least have earned a reputation for integrity!
What a foolish branch family member!
Where has all his Confucian learning gone?
With a grave expression, Fei Min said to Fei Qian, "The Master once said, A gentleman holds righteousness above all. A gentleman with courage but no righteousness becomes a rebel; a petty man with courage but no righteousness becomes a bandit. Wealth and rank are what men desire, but if they are not obtained properly, they should not be held. Poverty and obscurity are what men detest, but if they cannot be avoided properly, they should not be shunned. Now, with great righteousness within reach, how could you evade misfortune and forsake duty? Ziyuan, you erred in this matter!"
Fei Min's meaning was clear: a gentleman must prioritize righteousness, especially when it came to courage. Implicitly, he was accusing Fei Qian of lacking both righteousness and bravery.
Moreover, Fei Min's subsequent words carried a tone of reproach, admonishing Fei Qian for pursuing wealth and status at the expense of moral duty. Even in the face of danger, one should meet it head-on rather than shrink away.
And this might not even have been a true danger!
By the end, Fei Min's tone was tinged with frustration, his disappointment palpable.
Fei Qian found himself at a loss for words and could only meekly agree.
What else could he say?
Fei Min was not only the family head but also his elder. When an elder offered opinions or guidance, how could he possibly argue back?
Had Fei Qian done so, while it might not have been outright treasonous, his reputation would undoubtedly have been marred by accusations of arrogance and disrespect.
The Han dynasty placed great emphasis on filial piety—so much so that actions considered absurd by later generations were seen as natural and even praiseworthy at the time. The key reason was the imperial selection system, which prioritized filial piety and integrity, with filial piety ranked above integrity.
During Emperor Huan's reign, there was a famous incident involving a man named Zhao Zi, a paragon of filial devotion. One day, bandits raided his home. To avoid alarming his eighty-year-old ailing mother, Zhao Zi not only invited the bandits to dine but also declared that aside from leaving his mother some clothing and food, they were free to take anything else—his wife, children, money, or possessions—without resistance.
This left the bandits utterly bewildered. Their leader sighed and said, How could we possibly harm such a filial son?
The bandits left without taking anything. Yet Zhao Zi, feeling guilty for letting them depart empty-handed, gathered some valuables and chased after them...
Regardless of whether this story was true, it was widely praised and circulated during the Han dynasty, illustrating just how highly filial piety was regarded.
Thus, regardless of whether Fei Min's words today held any merit, had Fei Qian dared to contradict or refute him, the label of unfilial would have been inescapable.
And so, Fei Qian could only respectfully accept Fei Min's admonitions and admit his "mistakes."
But given how the conversation had unfolded, it was clear that further meaningful discussion with Fei Min was impossible. In the end, Fei Qian could only excuse himself and take his leave.
Standing outside the Fei family estate, Fei Qian let out a quiet sigh. Though his ties to the Fei family had never been strong, it was disheartening to lack familial support at a time when he needed it most.
Perhaps there would be future opportunities to communicate with Fei Min, but by then, circumstances might have changed entirely.
What can be done?
Let it be.
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