"Son of a bitch, those Long Foots hit us damn quick." I said, trying to refrain from itching at the melting skin rubbing against the fabric in my boots. That fireball came down right between me, Bertrude, and that shit-brained long foot, Paul.
"While I'm all for ruminating superior strategy methods, I have to counter your inquiry with the request you get this log the fuck off me." Bertrude 'happily' replied from under the end of a downed tree. I swear, if this freaky bastard wasn't one of the best young salesmen in all of the Anvilar Domini-er, I mean the 'Deep Mint Compact' , I'd have eliminated the smug prick 3 objectives ago. Unfortunately, our home and its people have fractured, leaving talented tools like Bertrude necessary evils. At least until we can unite our forge once more..
"Hey, where's Paul? That idiot has my arcannon." I angrily demanded after digging my hands under the bark and lifting it out enough for Bertrude to shimmy out. My mind screamed louder than my muscles, frantically hoping that clumsy long foot didn't get my favorite bunker-buster stolen. Plus, that thing was a damn prototype.
"Totally understandable question. Let's circle back to that discussion later, when survival feels more tangible." Bertrude replied, pinching his jewel studded first finger and thumb together.
*BOOM*
Another ball of flame erupted, blasting the tree trunk at my side into fiery wooden fragments that cascaded to the wet foliage floor. Making note where Bertrude was hiding, which was literally in the same hollow log that'd nearly crushed him, and clicked my heels. A rush of mana quickly drained from my resources as the arcane thrusters activated in my hover boots. Making a note to lay off using any explosive or ricocheting bolt skills, I leaned forward and let the hover boots pull me frictionlessly across the rain forest. My Arcane Repeaters hummed with mana bolts as I unleashed several bursts of cover fire, letting one Tracking Bolt loose in case there were any targets tanking those shots down line.
Several rain-soaked trees creaked and moaned as my bolts ricocheted and ripped through the bark like a cannonball to wet cardboard. Multiple trees collapsed in on themselves almost in unison, the mighty wooden giants' loud rumbling falls creating a deep, heavy cacophony of wooden shrieks. My Repeaters panned slowly through tall brush, all of my focus locked onto the treeline separating our targets little oasis and this rain forest. One dark strand of hair fell from my armored cowl, slinking between my eyes. The rain pinned the strands against my skin, the passing wind occasionally tickling the inside of my eyelid.
Angrily shaking my head to dislodge the pesky hair, I bolted back across the forest floor and back toward Bertrude. I was only roughly 8 meters away, just far enough to catch anyone trying to sneak up on him. Just as I drifted back around the ravaged tree stump I'd mentally delegated as his marker, Paul's tall, lithe build seemingly manifested directly in front me. A heavy thump rang out from my forehead as we collided, his boney elbow being the last thing I got to see before adopting a splitting headache.
"Dammit, Paul! You're getting a fucking bell when we're done here." I angrily barked at the untimely long foot, rubbing the already swelling bruise under my cowl. Paul was fully knocked to the floor, falling almost comically hard before popping up to his feet.
"Right! Uh, s-sorry sir." He stammered out in his signature pitiful fashion.
"No time, where's my arca-" before I could finish my question, Paul brandished the prototypical weapon of mine, as if it was always in his hand.
"Right here, sir!" Paul said excitedly. His voice sounded higher pitched than usual, though I had noticed it tended to climb in pitch the more nervous this bumbling human got. With a sigh of relief, I reached for the arcannon.
"Finally, glad you finally decided to be of some use for o-" my hand tugged back, the shock at his firm grip on the weapon halting my words entirely. His brow furrowed confusedly peering down at the arcannon we shared a grasp on.
"I don't understand, I saved the weapon." Paul insisted. A tinge of respect tickled at the back of my mind for his newfound gull, enough for me to refrain from the urge to unload 8 bolts into his chest.
"You want a bloody medal for it? Try not shooting me in the fucking foot and giving away your location twice before finally contributing next time, and I may give you a tad more grace." I said, hovering my repeaters close together and ensuring both ends pointed up at his ugly mug.
"R-right, sorry. Here." He mumbled, averting his previously intense eye contact with fluttering blinks. All at once, cowardice returned to this oversized child's demeanor. Shaking my head, I glided over to Mulrich and handed him the Arcannon.
"Wow, what a deal! I intend to increase the overall market merit of this item's efficiency with my performance today." Mulrich performatively replied, shakily taking the mana launcher from me. It was roughly the size of both our torsos, though I found the weight distribution comfortable enough to hold the Arcannon casually by its handle.. Not willing to waste another moment on my companions' insanity, I glided across the forest yet again. This time finding a cluster of tall flora to tuck into, making sure to select a bush close enough to reach Mulrich.
It didn't take long for our restless attackers to push ahead, a rustling in the brush being met immediately with streaks of mana bolts and nearly a dozen explosive arcane shells. Once the smoke finally settled, all there was left was another crater deep enough to bury seven Long Foots. I felt myself nodding approvingly while looking in Bertrude's direction, genuinely impressed at his trigger finger. Then, a bright orange flash slammed into another tree, the waterlogged bark crumbling upon impact. The rest of the towering tree slowly tipped back, forcing Bertrude to sprint out from his hidden position and across the forest.
My boots still hummed with the small amounts of the mana it constantly burned to remain active, now whirring with life levitating me frictionlessly toward Bertrude's scurrying figure. My eyes scanned across our flank, making note the blast came seemingly from behind us based on the impact angle with the tree.
*THUNK*
"Argh, fu-" my vision doubled as I felt a heavy impact slam into the side of my head. My repeaters fired blindly as I collapsed, hoping to rip through whoever got the drop on me. Paul's arms pumping through the air caught my eye as I landed on the ground, realizing his clumsy tendencies might've been the culprit to my headache.
*BOOM*
Another ball of fire ripped into the forest floor, Paul's entire figure disappearing in a bright orange flash. Him and Bertrude, who was still sprinting behind cover, assumed to find me. Sighing, I narrowed my focus on the task at hand. With both of my teammates gone, I'll have no reason to check my shots if any movement sti-
"Hey." Spinning around, my repeaters brandished looking to remove whoever just whispered behind me. And, of course, Paul stood directly behind me. I was about to pull the trigger anyway, when I saw he had my arcannon in his hands.
"Oh! Good, you got my prototype!" I noticed, rejoicing in the rush of relief at not worrying about my bolts hitting the arcannon. Especially if those damned Long-Foot's decided to steal it for themselves, greedy bastards.
"Y-yeah, got it here." Paul muttered, glancing down at the glimmering arcane energy swirling visibly throughout its metallic structure. Bronzium was the only material available at the Minted Quartermastery that could suffice for its casing. At least, the only one available for non-standardized projects.
"Good, try not to shoot me, and we should be okay." I said to Paul. He nodded, then immediately stepped behind me. While he stood tall, there was no question his cowardice had gotten Bertrude eliminated. Whether it was him knocking me over before I could reach the excitable merchant, or his own failure to get there himself doesn't really matter right now. I'll just have to lug him to the end, and find him when these quarterlies are over.
Ducking low, I glided over to another set of tall brush that swayed with the windy downpour. Just as I nestled in nicely somewhere the rain wasn't dumping down on me from a branch overhead, a dark metallic helm peaked over the ridge line, slowly snaking up through the slick rain forest.
"Down!" I whispered urgently to Paul, waving my hand behind. The clumsy Long-Foot dropped to his belly, rustling the brush we hid inside. I threw an angry glare his way, one that was surprisingly not even acknowledged. Then again, the idiots' wandering mind really shouldn't come as much of a shock to me anymore. Shaking off his dangerous stupidity, I turned attention back to the rising helm. This time I didn't locate the bobbing metal gear alone, rather an entire Long-Foot standing in the clearing no more than 5 meters away from us. They held a long battle axe, one fitting for a Long Foot's barbaric nature.
"Gotcha." I said, feeling a grin crease across my lips while raising my repeaters.
"What is it?" Paul whispered, right before my slowly pressing finger fully squeezed back the trigger. I released my grip to respond, not willing to miss this opportunity.
"Killing the target, quiet." I shot back, taking a deep breath to slow my angrily fluttering heart. Paul sighed deeply from behind, loud enough to possibly alert the enemy Long Foot.
"Shut it you bird-brained Long Foo-" my eyes shot open wide realizing I could no longer speak, my throat clogged with something strong and cold. My face slammed down into the dozens of tiny roots we hid atop. I felt up above my head instinctively, a sharp steel cutting my finger before the world disappeared with a loud, burning hot zap.
——————————————————————
Argh…my head!?
Dozens of raindrops beat down on my face as my eyes fluttered open, finding myself laying under a towering tree. My head lay propped against the tree bark, the awkward position causing my back to painfully crack several times as I sat up. My head pounded like a thousand drums, reminding me heavily of the college games I used to go to with my dorm mates. Rubbing my scalp, I nearly jumped up at the pain of rolling my hand over a massive welt on the top of my head. Gritting my teeth, I slowly clamored to my feet and attempted to gather my thoughts.
Okay, we're here with the dwarves. Dozens of insults flung my way in the spam of 2 days max cycled through my memory at the very thought of those over-achieving shitheads. Mulrich was admittedly the meanest, though he always insisted I'm left with something to defend myself with. Of course, it was always under the guise of ensuring my utility to the Deep Mint. Frankly, I don't plan on getting close enough to either of them to find out how necessary that mint would be. Regardless, he was always far kinder to me compared to Bertru..
Oh shit.
I shot up from the cold wet soil, realizing the last I saw either of them was right before being blasted by one of those damned fireballs. Scanning the forest however, it wasn't difficult to pick out where they might have gone by the mess of downed trees peppering the floor. I carefully stepped around the debris, trying my best to ignore my beating headache. After a quick check, my meager pool of 98 health points have already been diminished to an even more measly 23. The welt on my skull wasn't going anywhere, the rain serving and an infinite loop of tiny fingers prodding at the injury by the dozens.
*snap*
My eyes darted across the forest as I ducked down, knowing that twig breaking wasn't my doing. My head ducked low, I peered around a few lines of sight behind a tree. Of course, nothing except the carnage could be found.
*rustle*
I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as the flora behind me shuffled, immediately diving forward into an awkward crawl before clambering upright and into a full sprint. Looking back, a splash of water fell beside a thick tree trunk, one much larger in volume than the downpour bearing down on me. Turning back however, my feet slipped on a rock trying to rapidly change direction away from the heavily armored man clutching a big-ass axe in his hand. My heel slid across the slick fora, sending me sliding toward the man's feet. He just stood there, his dark helm glowing yellow at the eyeholes like some kind of monster. I heard myself out one pitiful yelp of fear before scrambling back up to my feet and darting away.
I heard footsteps quickly squelching through the moist soil in my direction. Yet, peering over my shoulder, the heavily armored man was merely walking my way, a massive ball of fire hovering over his open palm at his side.
*THUNK*
"Eh-ergh.." I barely groaned out, feeling my gut compress into my spine. My eyes fluttered, yet my vision blurred as the whiplash of all my momentum slamming on its breaks settled in on my neck. Feeling around my stomach however, I recognized a leg's musculature anywhere. As I felt the back of the stranger's calf, they ripped away their shin from its imprinted place on my shattered ribcage. I fell back on my backside, fighting to stave off the dizziness. Slowly, my vision refocused as the towering, lithe silhouette stood over me. The rain poured into my eyes, forcing me to cover my eyes with my open hand like a hat bill. That's when the figure squatted down, their horrifying features coming fully into view. Dark, short hair. Dry, pinkish complexion. The glimmer in their blue eyes.
It was me. There I was, standing over myself wearing a devilishly toothy grin.
"Hey buddy. Paul, right?" The other me asked, raising a blade covered in jutting bolts of electricity just under my neck. I lifted my chin high, hoping to avoid getting shocked, to little effect of course.
"Y-yeah?" I said, struggling to speak with my head lifted so uncomfortably high.
"Got it. Well, Paul-.." the other me said, pressing his hand over his eyes. Instead of rubbing the bridge of his nose like I'd expected however, he snatched and pulled away his own skin. In an instant, his skin stretched before rapidly changing complexion and texture entirely. The other me yanked away a tan piece of parchment paper that incinerated the moment it morphed. My clothes they copied disappeared in a puff of orange flame, replaced by an intricate mixed get-up of dark bottoms covered in pockets, and a blue and black set of cloth armor. The other 'me' turned to face me as they pulled over a glowing cowl, long strands of blonde hair and his blue eyes tucking under the shade of his hood.
"-make better friends." He said, his smile fading into a light grimace of disappointment as he spoke. Before I could reply, his hips twitched, and my vision spiraled wildly. Then, as I felt my face slam against the grass, every fiber of my face suddenly felt pulled within itself, my vision overcame with an intense darkness…one far deeper than shutting my eyes.