IN THE FIRST FEW DAYS, Li Wei's arrangements for Gu Mang were nonexistent. Mo Xi was dissatisfied with this state of affairs. "What did I bring him to Xihe manor for?" he demanded stormily. "It wasn't so he could just lie around here. Give him something to do, today."
"Not today," Li Wei replied hastily.
"Whyever not? Are you taking bribes from him?"
"How could I?" Li Wei said. "Besides, Gu Mang doesn't even know what the word 'bribe' means."
Seeing Xihe-jun's cold and handsome face stiffen and freeze over, Li Wei helplessly explained, "My lord, although Gu Mang learned a few rules at Luomei Pavilion, he still fundamentally thinks like a beast. He's awfully wary of you because he's lost fights to you before. Now that he's got a new home, of course he's tense and on edge."
"Are you speaking about a person or a cat?"
Mo Xi was clearly angry, but Li Wei seized on his words like a lifeline anyway. He clapped his hands and said, "Ah, my lord is so wise to see it at once! Just treat him as if he were a cat."
Was there anyone more opportunistic in his flattery than Li Wei? Yet it worked. After being praised so effusively, Mo Xi couldn't possibly continue to rebuke Li Wei. Mo Xi nailed him with a glare and let him keep talking.
"My lord, please think of it like this: a cat, when first taken home, is afraid of strangers," said Li Wei. "Only after it's grown familiar with its surroundings will it be willing to venture out and wander around, catch mice, and so on. Gu Mang is the same right now. You see, he's a complete newcomer, a stranger to everyone. He's already hiding himself away in the most godforsaken places. Yesterday, I spent a shichen looking for him. Guess where he was?"
"I have no interest in where he secretes himself," Mo Xi replied coldly.
"Oh, well—in short, when I finally found him, I didn't even have time to open my mouth before he scampered away."
Mo Xi was still for a moment. "Where was he hiding?" he asked flatly.
He was met by silence.
The other servants nearby couldn't take much more of this. All of them truly admired how Li Wei's eye only twitched before he continued on as calmly as before. "The rice barrel in the granary." He paused, then added, "After he scurried inside, he even pulled the lid back on."
Mo Xi brought his palm to his forehead, as if suffering a massive headache.
"So, my lord," Li Wei said, "even if this subordinate did want to speak to him and assign him work, I could scarcely find him in the first place. And even if I did, he'd run away at the sight of me."
Mo Xi had no words. Sure, this all rather made sense, but why did it put him in a foul mood?
"In this subordinate's opinion," Li Wei continued, "we should ignore him for a few days. But don't scare him either. When he comes out on his own to sunbathe in the courtyard, I'll give him some work to do."
Mo Xi thought it over and realized that he had no choice but to resign himself to this outcome. "Give him the hardest work," he grumbled.
"Of course, of course."
Mo Xi privately thought Li Wei was too much of a kiss-up, but he gave good advice more often than not. Gu Mang was indeed too bestial right now, creeping about like an animal who had just been brought to Xihe Manor.
So Mo Xi carefully observed Gu Mang's behavior for a few days, and found that—Just as Li Wei had said—Gu Mang spent his daylight hours hiding in dark and secluded corners. His eyes shone from the shadows as he stared warily at all who passed by. He discovered that Gu Mang had two favorite hiding spots, one of which was the rice barrel in the granary. Once, unable to stop himself, Mo Xi solemnly lifted up a corner of the wooden lid with a soft clatter, revealing two glimmering motes of light staring back at him, just as expected. Mo Xi engaged in a staring contest with those shining pinpoints. Finding this silent stare-down deeply awkward, he replaced the lid with another clack.
But Gu Mang evidently no longer considered the rice barrel a safe hideout. Mo Xi hadn't even taken two steps when he heard the lid clack open again behind him. He looked back to see Gu Mang clambering out of the rice barrel in a manner he must have thought stealthy. As Gu Mang clung to the side of the barrel, he turned his head and met Mo Xi's gaze, his foot still suspended in midair.
They stared at each other in wordless silence.
In the next instant, Gu Mang hastily squirmed back into the barrel and closed the lid again. Curious, Mo Xi walked over and nudged the lid once more. This time, it seemed stuck, refusing to budge in the slightest. Gu Mang had apparently grabbed onto the lid from the inside, engaging Mo Xi in a covert standoff.
Exasperated and amused in equal measure, Mo Xi rapped on the lid. "What? Are you the Beast of the Rice Barrel instead of the Beast of the Altar now?"
Gu Mang fidgeted inside the barrel. He pretended like he wasn't there, but kept his grip on the lid steady.
Mo Xi tried again to speak to him, but all his words went unanswered. His mood gradually turned sullen. In the end, he flicked his sleeves and decided he would waste no more breath on Gu Mang. "Lunatic," he muttered under his breath as he turned to leave. When he checked the granary the next day, Gu Mang had already abandoned the rice barrel as a hiding spot.
Gu Mang's other favored lair was the wine cellar. After the rice barrel, this was his favorite spot to lurk during the day. However, Mo Xi wasn't interested in paying him another visit. After all, the wine cellar was pitch-black; he'd only be able to see those two faintly glowing eyes. That interested him not at all.
Late one night, Mo Xi was reading by lamplight when he heard rustling outside. He pried the window slightly open with his fingertips and saw Gu Mang pacing about by the light of the moon. Gu Mang's expression was mild, but his eyes were alert as they darted around his strange new surroundings. Many nights passed this way. Sometimes, Gu Mang crouched on a stone bench to stare spellbound at the moon. His features were always placid and his eyes vacant. On other nights, he stared blankly at the fish in the lake. From time to time, he would stick a hand in to stir up the waters, the moon's glimmering reflection bathing his silhouette in cold light.
But most often of all—and this truly dumbfounded Mo Xi—Gu Mang came out to forage for food. Mo Xi didn't know exactly how voracious Gu Mang's appetite was these days, but he'd found it quite excessive the few times he'd seen Gu Mang eat. For example, tonight Gu Mang had slipped into the dining hall. One stick of incense later, he finally lurched out with considerable difficulty. Under the pristine moonlight, this thief looked impossibly huge: he had slung across his shoulders two bamboo baskets laden with steamed buns. A rope of sausages was coiled around his neck, and a meat pie dangled from his mouth. Mo Xi knew he must have taken the largest one from the basket. Gu Mang was also clutching a heap of boiled corn; a few ears were even pinned under his arms.
"Is this a bear?" Mo Xi muttered behind the slightly cracked window.
The Bear of the Altar peered around, checking that he hadn't been spotted, then loped back into the cellar at top speed. He moved so fast that a few of the corncobs in his arms unfortunately tumbled away. Stunned, Gu Mang stopped in his tracks and crouched to pick up the fallen ears of corn. As soon as he moved his arms, however, the corn cobs pinned beneath them fell to the ground as well. He froze once more. After a second's thought, he shoved the corn in his hands under his arms, and then nonchalantly reached down to pick up the newly fallen cobs on the ground. But as soon as he picked up the cobs on the ground, the corn beneath his arms fell again... He repeated this cycle of retrieving and dropping the corn over and over, again and again...
Mo Xi had no words. If Gu Mang was truly pretending, he didn't need to go to all the trouble of being a war general after all. He could switch careers and become an actor at the Pear Garden(Oldest art academy in China).
Gu Mang stood in the courtyard in a state of complete befuddlement, staring helplessly for a long time. Eventually, he reached out a tentative hand to carefully pick a corncob off the ground.
Nice! Got it!
The corn under his arms fell once more.
Gu Mang really could not understand what was going on, so he scratched his head, bewildered. The moment he did, a few corncobs tumbled out of his arms again.
Mo Xi was silent. Perhaps it was because he couldn't stand watching any more of this stupidity, perhaps it was because he thought Gu Mang's act was too flawless, perhaps even because he sensed that Gu Mang wasn't putting on an act after all, and his mind was truly broken—whatever the reason, fury roared up in Mo Xi's heart. Under its fiery influence, he flung the window open and thundered, "Are you dumb? Are you a pig? Can't you shove a few ears of corn into the basket on your back?"
The servants in the surrounding buildings were all startled awake. They pushed open their windows to look outside, bleary-eyed. "What's going on?" someone shouted. "Are there monsters?"
None of them had expected to see anything like the scene that greeted them. Silence reigned in the courtyard. Yet there was no end to Mo Xi's rage. "You don't even know how to pick up corn?! The very sight of you annoys me!"
Even the meat pie had fallen out of Gu Mang's mouth. He turned his head to stare wide-eyed at Mo Xi. In response to Mo Xi's fierce and unfriendly expression, he grabbed an ear of corn and hurled it at him without hesitation.
"And you dare to raise a hand against me?!" Mo Xi snapped.
Although Gu Mang's shot had missed its target, he still turned tail and ran off with his loot. He nearly tripped in his haste to flee, but his martial foundation showed itself in this moment: in the spilt second before he would've fallen flat on his face, he caught himself, planting a hand on the ground. He then sprang to his feet and dashed into the cellar. Each movement flowed into the next as smooth as water, impossibly agile.
Under the moonlight, golden ears of corn lay scattered across the ground. The servants and Mo Xi were all flabbergasted. Li Wei was first to react. He slammed his window shut and extinguished his lamp at lightning speed, as though he hadn't seen a thing. The other servants weren't so lucky and ended up on the receiving end of a severe dressing-down from General Mo. "What do you think you're looking at?! Hurry up and go to sleep!"
After having corn thrown at him before an audience, Mo Xi's bad mood lingered. He fumed the rest of the night, and only managed to quell his fury by setting fire to ten whole baskets of corn the next day. Still, he was disgruntled. As he stood by the pool feeding the fish, he asked Li Wei through gritted teeth, "How does he have the nerve to throw things at me?"
Li Wei sighed ruefully. Their Xihe-jun was excellent in all respects, other than the fact that he was too fussy and had a bad temper. Thus, Li Wei cajoled Mo Xi as he peeled fruit for him, "Aiyo, my lord, my lord, what's the point in getting mad? If you got sick that would be bad. Isn't it just an ear of corn? No one's happy when you're mad. Besides, what goes around comes around. Today he throws stuff at you, tomorrow you'll toss stuff at him. Just bear with it a little longer and it'll pass. C'mere, my lord, have a slice of pear."
Mo Xi thought it over and realized that he indeed had few other options. He frostily accepted the pear without a word.
Looking after Gu Mang was indeed like caring for an animal. As the days passed, Gu Mang gradually lowered his guard around the people of Xihe Manor. Sometimes, he would creep out during the day and find a sheltered corner from which to silently survey his surroundings. When the courtyard was empty, he would sit by the pond and peacefully sunbathe for a spell.
One sunny afternoon, Mo Xi was meditating under a tree that seemed to be filled with squirrels preparing for winter. Not only were the leaves rustling, but every now and then a shower of fruit pits would rain down from its branches. At first, Mo Xi was only slightly irked, but then a fruit pit smacked him squarely on the crown of his head. Never had he ever come across such an audacious little tree rat! His eyes snapped open as he glared up into the foliage—only to see Gu Mang perched on a branch high above.
With his arms wrapped around the trunk, Gu Mang was shoving berries into his mouth with one hand while stuffing them into a cloth pouch with the other. His movements were rather clumsy as he grabbed bunch after bunch of berries. Sometimes, errant fruits slipped between his fingers and tumbled to the ground like coral beads. The object that hit Mo Xi must have been one of these.
Mo Xi was instantly speechless with fury. Seething quietly, he leveled a ferocious kick at the tree trunk. Berries noisily rained down from the canopy. "Gu Mang!" Mo Xi roared amid the downpour of fruit.
Only then did the cheerful berry-picker Gu Mang notice that someone was standing beneath the tree. He looked down, and his gaze met Mo Xi's. The two stared at each other for a long moment. Gu Mang remained silent, but his bulging cheeks twitched—he clearly had more than one berry in his mouth.
"Get down from there!" Mo Xi snapped.
Gu Mang's cheeks moved again. He swiftly looped the little cloth pouch around his neck and clambered into a higher, denser section of branches, taking care to tuck himself completely out of sight.
Mo Xi was on the verge of collapse. "Great. Great job. You're sure you won't fall out and die?"
Gu Mang tossed another pit down from his perch in answer. To this, Mo Xi had no response.
Mo Xi ground his teeth and endured Gu Mang's behavior for many long weeks, until the weather turned bitterly cold. One day, Mo Xi got out of bed to see Li Wei waiting outside his room. When he saw Mo Xi push open the door, he bowed and said, "My lord."
Mo Xi glanced at him. Court was not in session today, and Li Wei wouldn't wait for him like this without reason. Mo Xi asked blandly, "Did something happen at the Bureau of Military Affairs?"
Li Wei offered him an ingratiating smile. "No, it's a different piece of good news."