Holding back, I was afraid to speak my thoughts aloud, in a sense they might not appreciate the way I verbalize my feelings and thoughts.
It won't be the same as it was before.
It rings my head and fingers are trembling without myself sensing it.
I only felt it when I saw it.
It's not the same as how I am with communicating, before I was carefree, and now gatekeeping the words that must be let out of my soul.
But would they listen to me yapping this and that?
Would they have time to listen and focus on me?
I guess not.
I guess I am a person that cannot be valued and listened to. I hope someone will at least stay by my side and listen to my story.
My story would not be so amazing if they would think, but the presence.
I am scared to say facts, because they might say the opposite way.
What was all that studying for, if I am scared…?
Handling all this unnecessary burden behind my back, I asked myself
Why are you keeping all that to yourself? Let them free.
How?
Tell me, so I could raise my head and speak comfortably.
Because it felt like no one would listen to me no matter how many words I say.
To them it is nonsense
Am I even valid to speak up my feelings?