9 out of 10 people agree…
Gangbangs are awesome.
———
But right now? I don't think I like it.
The smaller spaceships above popped open like futuristic Tupperware, and from them emerged every possible gym-freak species known to hentai.
Some wore masks, some had horns, some had muscles so stacked they looked like a Photoshop ad for steroid side-effects. Not a single female in sight. Great. A full buffet of testosterone, no dessert.
If death must come… let it come from thighs.
[ I will give you my thigh if you emerge victorious. ]
'I will renounce my defeat right now if that's the reward.'
[ I was kidding. Don't do that. I will give you thicc chicks if you win. ]
'Heh. If you think you can bribe me into fighting that crimson crackhead by dangling the desire of flesh in front of me…'
I closed my eyes.
'You are absolutely correct.'
Hah!
Morality? Honor? Self-respect?
Never heard of 'em.
Horniness, though? That's my battle cry.
Still, I wasn't suicidal. I'd only jump in when Shakespeare's intergalactic lovechild here finished downloading his powers.
I'm not Black Widow—I don't have the thighs, nor the plot armor. If I stepped forward now, that red hulk would turn me into spaghetti bolognese with zero effort.
The alien flood kept raining from the sky like it was Black Friday at the Galaxy Mall, but curiously, none landed on the continent the red guy was in.
He was holding the Gangbang continent to himself like a jealous toddler with a sandbox.
Me, Erect, and Sexis—the alien king whose name sounds like an adult site you accidentally open in class—watched from behind the boundary wall, waiting for the fall parade to end.
Seriously, there were too many. I would not have believed so many people could exist if I hadn't visited India in my previous life.
Population control is a fleeting thought nowadays.
After a solid thirty minutes of cosmic rain, the things finally stopped falling.
Kinda like my GPA in 12th grade.
And good god, they weren't Human. Just… Human-shaped. Like AI-generated extras in a budget sci-fi movie.
The red guy hadn't moved. He was still staring at the ground like he dropped his airpods and never recovered.
Then—
BEEP!
All nine mini-ships let out the same annoying microwave sound.
Only after that did Big Red raise his head.
He was finally looking ahead.
We were behind him, though. I could see everything as I had a Skill for that.
He was looking in front of him, and there was no one in his sight. The Aliens had either died or run away to hide.
I mean, I could only see that monster and the three of us as far as I could see.
Also, I prayed the monster couldn't see us.
But judging by how my spine was trying to escape my body, I had a feeling he could see through lies, walls, and possibly virginity. But still, I would stay hidden.
SHING!
Hmm?
A bright light caught my eye.
Coming from beside me.
I looked there, and it was the Alien King.
"It's happening," I grinned.
He smiled. His chest began glowing like Iron Man with erectile dysfunction.
"Indeed, I am attaining my long-awaited abilities, my ephemeral confidant."
"Yeah. I can see that. But can't you dim the brightness a little bit? I don't want to get discovered by your disco lights."
"I possess no dominion over that, my human companion. And I believe this radiance shall only intensify."
"What? I don't give a fuck. Make it stop. That monster will see us. Hide yourself. Do something."
"I find myself unable to move, as my body undergoes a profound transformation. It approaches... it draws near... a monumental shift... ahh..."
SHRILL!
This nannyfucker was spewing some Kamasutra shit just over a light. Just say "I'm powering up," damn it! But as he said, the light only illuminated further.
Then, a pillar of white light shot out from his chest straight into the sky like he just did a celestial nut.
And of course—all heads turned.
Including the Big Red's.
His crimson eyes flickered toward our direction like he'd just sniffed betrayal from across the map.
The Alien was fluttering his big red eyes as if he was getting a blowjob. The bastard was in pleasure, not knowing that this act of his would force us to pleasure these monsters instead.
Me and Erect were hiding behind the wall like cockroaches during a power outage.
The white pillar stayed in the sky longer than my last relationship.
And by that I knew we were doomed.
But at least… maybe… just maybe…
Sexis now had powers.
Useful ones, I hoped.
Not like: "Summon A Goblin with a guitar" or "Throw Glitter."
After five whole minutes, the light dimmed.
Sexis stood there like a budget anime protagonist post-transformation.
He blinked.
I blinked.
Then I asked the only logical thing:
"So… Do you feel stronger or just shinier?"
"Verily, I sense an immense surge in strength, magnitudes beyond before. Furthermore, a sophisticated digital interface has materialized before me, meticulously presenting the entirety of my acquired proficiencies."
His vocabulary increased as well. And he says he got a system window in front of him. Nice.
"How many skills did you receive in total?"
Sexis squinted his eyes, and after a little while, he answered:
"The grand total stands at six thousand, nine hundred and sixty-nine."
The same number as mine.
'Does he have the same skills as me?'
[ Yes and no. Their God had already made some Skills, and when I joined him, we both created skills for him and handed this Alien 6969 skills. The situation is dire right now, after all. ]
'I know. I just hope you gave him some awesome skills.'
[ Relax. I hooked him up. ]
I stopped talking.
Sexis was now staring at his fists like he was about to give the Earth a prostate exam.
Just then—
CLAP!
The red bastard clapped.
We all jolted like he'd just announced a hunger games re-run.
Then-
CLAP!
Another clap.
Louder.
This time we peeked over the wall…
And we didn't see his back anymore.
Instead, we saw his face.
He was now in front of us but still far away.
Waiting.
Watching.
Smiling.
Like a dentist who doesn't use anesthesia.
I wondered when he'd finally snap and start the carnage.
"Everyone—" the monster shouted, his voice heavier than the sock I used to release my load in.
Us three froze.
Even gravity hesitated.
Then, like a drill sergeant possessed by Satan's gym coach, he scanned the chaos… and his eyes—red, glowing, accusatory—landed right on me. And with the finality of a man who's about to send you into a blender, he ordered:
"Attack!"