Chapter 58: The Uchiha Clan's Brilliant Ideas
"Ahem..."
The Great Elder cleared his throat and slowly walked to the head seat.
His gaze swept across the gathered Uchiha before lingering briefly on Asuka. A moment later, he quietly looked away.
He had heard every word of the exchange between Asuka and Ryoichi.
That boy...
No matter how serious the discussion, he always managed to steer it toward somewhere completely absurd.
No wonder Ryoichi had resorted to the "stall until later" strategy.
If he'd actually agreed to Asuka's proposal...
Mikoto would probably spend the rest of his life cursing him.
Still...
After thinking about it carefully...
The Great Elder realized there might actually be another way to interpret Asuka's idea.
No one could predict what Tsunade Senju was thinking.
But...
He was fairly confident he understood Mikoto.
If Fugaku suddenly asked for a divorce...
Would the overwhelming grief awaken an even stronger Sharingan?
She already possessed the Three-Tomoe Sharingan.
What if one final emotional shock pushed her all the way to the Mangekyō?
Even if the odds were only one in ten thousand...
If the clan gained another shinobi of that caliber, their current predicament would no longer be a problem.
As for cleaning up the aftermath...
That would certainly be difficult.
Fortunately...
He planned to retire before then.
Interfering in clan affairs after retirement?
Heh.
That wasn't how elders should behave.
The younger generation deserved their chance.
"..."
Then another terrifying thought occurred to him.
What if Mikoto pointed at Asuka and declared that only one of them would leave alive?
Both were pillars of the clan.
Losing either one would be disastrous.
"...I'll remember this idea."
"If the clan ever faces another crisis..."
"...I'll let Fugaku decide."
After all...
Fugaku was the clan head.
---
The Great Elder stood there lost in thought.
Below him, whispers spread throughout the room.
"...Has the Great Elder finally reached his limit?"
Asuka rested his chin on one hand.
"Maintaining the spirit of an old warhorse eager to charge another thousand miles is admirable."
"But..."
"When you get old and can't keep up anymore..."
"You should step aside and let someone else take over."
Ryoichi immediately nodded in agreement.
"The Great Elder really is getting on in years."
"He might even die in office."
"He's devoted his entire life to the clan."
"It's time he enjoyed a peaceful retirement."
As he spoke, he proudly puffed out his chest and looked around the room.
"I nominate myself."
"Who supports me?"
"Heh."
Asuka let out a cold laugh.
He casually slapped a sheet of paper onto Ryoichi's desk.
Across the page was written one bold word.
DIVORCE
"Support goes both ways."
"..."
Ryoichi glanced at the paper.
Then pretended nothing had happened.
"I nominate myself."
"Does anyone support me?"
Another elder calmly walked forward.
"Asuka is right."
"Support is mutual."
He placed his own proposal onto Ryoichi's desk.
"I've been thinking recently."
"I've realized Konoha's prejudice against us comes from the fact that we appear too weak."
"My proposal..."
"...is to hold one-on-one duels."
"We'll crush the entire village through the strength of the Uchiha."
"They'll have no choice but to acknowledge our superiority."
Ryoichi stared blankly at him.
"..."
"...Using the entire clan to suppress Konoha?"
I wouldn't even dare dream that big...
His gaze slowly shifted to a blind elder sitting nearby.
Before he could speak, the old man folded his arms and snorted.
"Ryoichi."
"If you want this old man's support..."
"...then you should support me first."
"...?"
Ryoichi looked utterly bewildered.
The blind elder confidently rose to his feet.
"After decades of research..."
"I've finally discovered why Hashirama Senju was so powerful."
"Let me make one thing clear."
"I don't admire Hashirama."
"I simply wish to praise him."
He paused before continuing.
"When people compare the Senju and the Uchiha..."
"They always conclude that the Senju surpassed us in strength, politics, and ideals."
"I've lived among the Uchiha my entire life."
"And..."
"I've concluded they're right."
Many members of the Uchiha were narrow-minded.
From childhood they were taught that personal strength could solve every problem.
Meanwhile...
Everyone else believed the opposite.
"The Uchiha create problems."
"The Senju solve them."
"And the key difference..."
"...was Hashirama Senju."
"He always tried to understand what others truly felt."
"Compared to us..."
"That quality stood out all the more."
"He possessed the most terrifying power in the ninja world."
"Personal charisma."
"He united clan after clan beneath his banner."
As the blind elder launched into his passionate speech, Asuka quietly tugged on Ryoichi's sleeve.
"...Brother."
"What exactly is he trying to say?"
"Does he want to abolish the Police Force?"
"Or disband the clan entirely?"
Ryoichi's lips twitched.
"No."
"He started praising Hashirama back when they were students at the Ninja Academy."
"Several decades later..."
"...he's still praising Hashirama."
"His proposal is actually very simple."
"Revive Hashirama Senju."
"Let him lead Konoha again."
"And rely on Hashirama's overwhelming charisma to erase discrimination against the Uchiha."
He sighed.
"The problem..."
"...is that the old man has absolutely no research talent."
"He's spent decades trying to resurrect the dead."
"He wants to drag all of us into his research."
"And keep resurrecting Hashirama forever."
"In his mind..."
"That would bring peace to the shinobi world."
"Konoha would prosper."
"And the Uchiha clan would flourish forever."
"..."
Asuka's eyelid twitched.
He had thought he was already ruthless enough.
He never imagined someone would want to resurrect Hashirama indefinitely...
...and make him work for eternity.
---
"Ahem."
The Great Elder finally snapped out of his thoughts.
Seeing the increasingly chaotic room, he coughed loudly.
"Silence."
Once the room quieted, he withdrew a sheet of paper from his robe.
"Now that the Fourth Hokage's authority has largely stabilized..."
"And thanks to the relationships we've built..."
"...along with the support we intend to provide..."
"Minato Namikaze already has an excellent impression of our clan."
"The next question..."
"...is how to spread that favorable image throughout Konoha."
"I'd like to speak."
The moment Asuka's voice rang out...
The Great Elder instinctively tightened his grip on the paper.
Please...
Don't twist this into another bizarre discussion...
Asuka rose to his feet.
Looking around at every Uchiha jōnin present, he calmly began.
"It's difficult to change how the world views the Uchiha."
"But it's not impossible."
"I'm sure all of you have read novels, comics, or magazines."
"In nearly every story..."
"The protagonist represents justice."
"The villain represents evil."
"And in the end..."
"Justice wins."
He paused.
"Back in Madara's era..."
"We became the villains who stood in the way of peace."
"Hashirama became the righteous hero."
"And today..."
"We're gradually becoming Konoha's villains once again."
"So..."
"What the Uchiha need right now..."
"...is a champion of justice."
The Great Elder blinked.
This...
Wasn't where he thought the conversation was going.
"Go on."
"The clan meeting welcomes every opinion."
"Say whatever you want."
Asuka nodded.
"If someone has carried the label of 'evil' for years..."
"And suddenly starts claiming to be a good person..."
"No one will believe them."
"But..."
"If that same villain is defeated by a hero..."
"And sincerely reforms afterward..."
"Everyone accepts it."
"So if we want to change the clan's reputation..."
"We first need to find a righteous hero."
"Someone capable of influencing the Uchiha."
"Then..."
"We simply continue creating small but visible changes."
"Eventually..."
"Konoha's citizens will naturally notice that we've changed."
The Great Elder slowly stroked his beard.
"I understand the theory."
"But..."
"Where exactly do we find this 'champion of justice'?"
"Someone capable of influencing the Uchiha..."
"...and convincing the people of Konoha?"
Asuka smiled confidently.
"Far away..."
"...yet right before your eyes."
The Great Elder slowly looked around the room.
Finally...
His eyes landed on Asuka.
"...You mean..."
"...yourself?"
"No."
Asuka shook his head.
"I'm talking about Princess Tsunade."
The Great Elder suddenly felt an ominous premonition.
"...So?"
"When is the clan head getting divorced?"
Smack!
The Great Elder slapped his own forehead.
"...Disgusting."
"This brat..."
"He took such a huge detour..."
"...just to come back to divorce again."
At that moment, someone rose from the far left side of the room.
He spat on the floor before fixing Asuka with an icy stare.
"Uchiha Asuka."
"What exactly did the clan head ever do to offend you?"
Asuka looked back without the slightest hesitation.
"Uchiha Yūdai."
"The clan head hasn't offended me."
"He offended the Uchiha clan."
"A clan head who truly cares about the future of his people..."
"...shouldn't be held back by something as trivial as marriage."
Yūdai narrowed his eyes.
"And even if he divorces..."
"How can you guarantee Tsunade will marry him?"
"Before Dan died..."
"Jiraiya pursued her for years."
"After Dan died..."
"He still got nowhere."
"What makes you think everything will happen exactly as you imagine?"
Asuka nodded calmly.
"I don't deny Dan's charm."
"Besides..."
"He has one overwhelming advantage."
"He's dead."
"A dead first love..."
"...is the strongest rival imaginable."
"He already occupies Tsunade's heart."
He shrugged.
"But..."
"What does any of that have to do with me?"
"I'm not the one chasing Tsunade."
"You—!"
Yūdai's face immediately turned bright red.
He pointed furiously at Asuka.
"If Tsunade didn't like the clan head before the divorce..."
"She won't like him afterward either!"
"Wouldn't the divorce be completely meaningless?"
"Heh..."
Asuka lightly patted the teapot resting on his shoulder.
Then he lowered his folded arms and smiled.
"Yūdai..."
"Do you really have no imagination?"
"Don't you understand..."
"...the importance of creating opportunities?"
Opportunities?"
"Tsunade has been famous for decades."
"She's experienced countless life-and-death battles alongside Jiraiya."
"Did any of those become opportunities?"
"Do you think she's some naïve little girl..."
"...who'd fall in love just because someone saved her once?"
"Tsk."
The teapot lid popped open.
Shukaku poked out his head and looked at Yūdai with utter contempt.
"Did you donate every last brain cell to your Sharingan?"
"He wasn't talking about that kind of opportunity."
"He meant an opportunity to get into bed."
"Honestly..."
"You're unpleasant to look at..."
"Your brain barely works..."
"And you're still arguing."
"I genuinely can't understand what goes on inside your head."
Yūdai's Sharingan instantly flared crimson.
His murderous glare fixed itself on the tiny tanuki.
Seeing that expression, Shukaku planted both hands on his hips and continued mercilessly.
"Think about it."
"If someone has sealed off their own heart..."
"Other than smashing it open with brute force..."
"...what else can you do?"
"Love?"
"Or perhaps—"
"Fire Release: Great Fireball Technique!"
Before Shukaku could finish, Yūdai suddenly unleashed an enormous torrent of flames.
Three roaring fire dragons surged through the chamber.
"Hah!"
Shukaku narrowed his eyes excitedly.
"Kid!"
"Someone picked a fight!"
"I noticed."
Asuka immediately dropped into stance.
His hands blurred through seals as massive amounts of chakra gathered in his throat.
At the very same moment...
Shukaku inhaled deeply.
His belly expanded like a balloon.
He slammed a paw against his stomach.
"Wind Release: Great Breakthrough!"
Wind fed the flames.
The flames devoured the wind.
Within an instant...
The entire underground meeting chamber became an ocean of fire.
The moment Asuka and Shukaku combined their techniques...
Every Uchiha jōnin present felt their pupils contract.
A combination ninjutsu?!
Since when did those two practice together?
Were they trying to wipe out every jōnin in the clan at once?!
"Fli—"
The Great Elder had barely opened his mouth to stop them...
...when someone grabbed his sleeve.
"Clan meeting adjourned!"
Ryoichi roared.
Without another word, he dragged the Great Elder toward the exit and smashed straight through the door.
BOOM!
Feeling the inferno rapidly closing in behind them, Ryoichi sighed while increasing his speed.
"Looks like that kid's fully recovered."
"That's good news for the clan."
"..."
The Great Elder's lips twitched.
He didn't answer.
Clan meetings...
Always ended in fights.
The only exception had been the darkest years of the clan's internal conflicts.
Back then, nearly every jōnin had either been hospitalized or recovering at home.
He'd been the only attendee.
...
Those meetings had been wonderfully peaceful.
An hour later.
With both hands in his pockets, Asuka leisurely walked home.
Just as he was about to leave after the fight...
The Great Elder had suddenly stopped him.
His new assignment?
Beautify the history of the Uchiha clan.
Beautify...
Asuka looked up at the drifting white clouds and sighed.
The clan's historical records were painfully barren.
Page after page consisted of nothing but fights.
Defeated three enemies today.
Crippled another minor clan during a mission tomorrow.
That was practically the entire archive.
"...Hey."
He glanced sideways at Shukaku, who was sitting thoughtfully on his shoulder.
"Got any ideas for improving our history?"
Shukaku shot him a sideways glance.
Then his tiny brain immediately kicked into overdrive.
Steam began pouring from his head once again.
Seeing that familiar sight, Asuka sighed and started thinking for himself.
The clan's history is too boring...
Maybe I should just write a new one.
Love...
Love usually existed between family...
Friends...
Or lovers...
"Lovers..."
Crack!
A piece of broken glass snapped beneath his foot.
Asuka suddenly slapped his right fist into his left palm.
His eyes lit up.
"I've got it."
"I'm drawing erotic manga."
"If Jiraiya's text-only novels can become bestsellers..."
"...there's no reason my fully illustrated color comics can't succeed."
At that moment, he looked down at the broken glass scattered across the street.
Then he raised his head toward the tall white wall beside him and shouted,
"Where's your public decency?"
"Who throws broken glass into the street?"
Shukaku immediately perked up.
His earlier thoughts vanished as he looked toward the wall with narrowed eyes.
"Life is about cleaning up after yourself..."
"...not dumping your garbage into public places."
"Even a female fox wouldn't—"
The sudden outburst startled Mikoto.
She had been leaning against the wall, still debating whether she should go home after arguing with Fugaku.
Her mood had already been ruined after reading the minutes from the clan meeting.
Uchiha Asuka...
Had once again spent the entire meeting trying to convince Fugaku to pursue another woman.
Thinking about his name alone made her unconsciously bite her lip until all color drained from it.
She leapt onto the wall.
Looking down coldly at Asuka, she asked,
"...Are you implying I have no public morals?"
Hearing her address herself with the formal "I," Asuka immediately looked up.
"Mikoto-sama."
"Let's put our personal grudges aside."
"And discuss this objectively."
"Treating the street like your living room..."
"...is a little heartless."
"...Heartless?"
Mikoto inhaled sharply.
She stared at him in disbelief.
"You just called me..."
"...heartless?"
"Mm."
Asuka nodded.
At that moment, he radiated the fearless aura of a man defending justice itself.
Power meant nothing to him.
Violence meant nothing to him.
He feared neither.
A blazing fireball suddenly descended from above.
Shukaku looked up in surprise.
"Do all Uchiha attack people without warning?"
"Not really."
Asuka casually dodged the fireball.
"It's just that..."
"They're terrible at expressing themselves."
"So they get angry."
"Their brains overheat."
"And violence becomes the easiest solution."
Shukaku nodded thoughtfully.
Remembering something he'd recently read in one of Asuka's magazines, he looked at Mikoto and declared,
"The magazine said..."
"When a woman gets angry..."
"...you only need to give her one—"
"...?"
Asuka turned in confusion.
Then he saw it.
A tiny black sphere—no larger than a pea—was already forming inside Shukaku's mouth.
His pupils instantly shrank.
A Tailed Beast Bomb?!
What woman could possibly survive that?!
...And when exactly did you start reading my magazines?!