*Fwissssssh* *Crash* *Fwissssssh* *Crash*
Waves upon a beach of golden sand. A great brightness from above. A tender warmth to its rays, a gentle breeze that moved through white hair. Not a cloud in the sky; just blue as far as the eye can see.
Soft sand under bare feet and toes. Swaying trees; a soft melody of rustling palms that accompanied the rhythmic crash of the waves.
Peaceful. No pain here, no suffering, no need for a reaper. No more death. Just peace.
Eren absorbed himself in the moment, knees brought to chest and arms wrapped taught.
The Reaper; in all his time on Earth, nothing but a sense of coldness bloomed. In death, there is a peace. No longer plagued by the thoughts of others, the fear of losing loved ones, the hatred for those who deserve far worse than death. All of it was left behind. Even Eren could never have imagined such joyous emotions would exist.
However, now all that was left behind. All that remains is what is the here and now. A second chance at the peace he so fruitlessly threw away the first time around. A chance to right a horrid decision on Eren's part.
It doesn't hurt here, not anymore.
*Crunch* *Crunch* *Crunch*
Shoeless feet, steps through warm sand. Eren felt a familiar presence, not sure who's but the presence of the familiar. Either way he kept his eyes low on the expanse of the ocean.
"Beautiful, your paradise. Very similar to mine..." The voice of a man, one that was once boney and hollow. A man that shaped Eren to who he is today.
"Malphas..." Words spoken without looking at the former reaper and nemesis. Hard to forget a reaper that provided such torment to him.
"Hello Eren... And please call me Matthias. Malphas is no more." Matthias took a seat next to the white-haired man.
"Last time I saw you; you were on your knees before deaths avatar, warning me of a life of endless death... You were right."
Silence for a moment. The pair letting the waves and wind fill the quiet.
"I never wanted that life for you... If you can believe that."
Eren turned to Matthias for the first time; a face of a man in peace. No longer was he gaunt with slicked back hair. A walking skeleton with pale flesh wrapped in a pristine suit.
Now his hair longer, almost wavy with subtly blonde tips. His face, whilst still pale and sunken in places, began to fill out with full cheeks and a strong jawline. Eyes no longer hollow, but piercing blue like sapphire. He belonged to the ocean with that look.
"Really? You were a bit of a prick trying to show me."
A sly smile from the man who had forgotten how to smile. One that caught Eren by surprise, the afterlife was truly full of surprises.
"Do you know why I'm here?"
The surprise on Eren's face faded with the question.
Eren didn't want reality in his paradise. He turned away, focusing on the sea instead of Matthias.
"Did Lucifer send you? Or perhaps death itself to drag me back kicking and screaming." Eren thought for a moment about how they could torture or hurt him more.
"I came on my own accord... Well, a certain woman who was smart enough to find someone who felt as you feel." Matthias looked to the sky; a proud smile formed across lips.
"My mother?" The only person that comes to mind that would fit that description here in whatever this afterlife was. Although, he did long to see her once more. What son wouldn't want to see his mother.
"A strong spirit... Stronger than I ever was." Matthias almost chuckled at the memory of his encounter with the late Mrs. Heart.
"Are you here to convince me to go back?" Eren finally meet the blue eyes, now filled with a sadness. A pitying stare.
"No... Only you can make that decision. However, I will give my thoughts on the matter if you are willing to hear it." Matthias offered in a calm tone.
His face no longer one of apathetic malice and cold calculation. Instead, he is soft features, a calmness for a sea breeze after the storm had passed.
"Let's hear it."
"Still as brash as ever I see." He turned back to the ocean; the breeze grew colder for a moment. The sea calmed. Almost like a sheet of glass.
"You have a choice to make... One of calm waters and peaceful days. Or one of endless nights of endless battles."
"You make it sound as though I'm needed."
"What did that ancient relic keep on telling us. 'The universe needs balance.' It was right in that regard. Death is many things, but never without reason. Taking our afterlife's, to ensure a future for others."
Eren looked away once more.
"I wish I said no."
"As did I for many years. Why did you think I was your tormentor." Matthias turned to Eren; looking to see the white-haired man lost in thought.
"And look where you got me... All the good I did for the world and all I've done is bring death upon myself and others." Eren didn't want to hear what the former reaper had to say. A life that he wanted sealed away.
"It just hurts... So much." The last few words spoken like a whimper. A crack in Eren's voice that grew deeper and deeper.
"I know." A gentle hand placed on Eren's shoulder.
"If I could do it all over again. The legion, your training, how I treated you... I should have helped you. I am sorry for all that I've done to you." A long-awaited apology.
"I wish I knew what the ring was, what it did to you and your family. I guess death really wanted the world to fear the ring again."
Death and all his machinations. Pawns in a greater game. One Eren was right in the middle of.
"If you go back, the pain will return. And the weight will only grow heavier as the ring demands more and more from you. Just as my pain returned when I saw the ring once more..."
"Your motivational work needs work-" An almost smile from Eren, but a look from Matthias said that there was more to say.
"But... I didn't have others to help carry my burden." He continued without interruption. A look of hope flashed across blue waves.
"An elf to your ear, students to guide, a sister to protect, a girl to soften your heart. And from experience, they are the ones that help the most…"
"How do you know that?" Eren turned with a look of surprise.
"The afterlife is endless days of fishing and nights of drinking. Sometimes we watch the land of the living." Matthias chuckled at the thought of how mundane the afterlife is for reapers. It certainly was not what they imagined as human children.
"Even Lucifer?" A slight curve to Eren's lips.
"That man is many things and could do better with empathy and less love for himself... But yes, he too can help your burden."
He stood up, dusting off the sand from his clothes.
"I'm sorry... For taking the ring and killing you. And all the shit I used to say about you." Eren looked up. Sun silhouetting the former Reaper in a golden hue.
"I'm sorry too... For the way I trained and treated you. I should have been a mentor rather than a persecutor." Matthias turned away, looking up at the sun.
A pain mended between two people.
"There are no wrong answers Eren. Whatever choice you make, you will pick the right one." He walked off, leaving behind footprints. The footprints quickly blew away with the soft winds that moved through the sand.
"There is someone else who would like a word with you before you decide." An ethereal voice from Matthias before fading completely into the crash of the ocean.
Two soft hands wrapped around the white-haired man's shoulders. One that pulled him to a warm embrace. One Eren knew all too well. A smell of cooking, jasmine shampoo, and the faintest hint of lemon. Memories flooded back, the times where she would hold Eren when the world seemed to get worse and worse.
"You need a haircut..." Her nose buried in the hair.
In an instant, tears flowed freely down his face. Unable to turn around, Eren simply let himself cry.
"I'm sorry..." Words were spoken between sniffles.
"You have nothing to apologise for. Nothing at all." She held onto the man tighter.
"I've missed you, mum." He turned, hugging her back.
"And I've missed you." She pulled away, wiping the tears from her son's face.
"You also need to sleep better. Those eyes make you look older than me." His mother pointed to the darkened rings under Eren's eyes.
The world around them came to a standstill. The ocean, the wind, all of it stopped as though frozen in time. Or perhaps it slowed down for a moment.
"Have strength, Eren. I know it hurts to see what this world can be... But you have already left a great mark upon the people you love. Emi's smile, your student's adoration, I also see a girl has caught your eye." A knowing smile as she ran fingers through the white locks of hair.
"I-I uh... Mum I-" Eren always became a stuttering foul when it came to talking about girls with his dear mother.
"She's cute, very pretty, very short too, make sure you keep feeding her. Be careful not shake her too much when your having-"
"Mum please..." He begged, trying to move away from her arms. But she held tight, unwilling to let her son go just yet.
"You should tell her, the burden you carry. And what you are... You know she won't be scared of you, right? Besides a girl well always figure it out eventually… "
Eren kept quiet for a moment before looking at the horizon.
"Yeah, she is very clever that one. Got me roped into a six-date contract." He chuckled.
"I'm very surprised you don't remember her. Even when she was such a young girl, she was always smitten with you." Mrs. Heart gave an all-knowing smile towards her son.
"What do you mean?" His eyes rounded to hers.
"Ah-ah-ah. I've been watching, you need to remember that for yourself. It makes the heart go fonder, ya know." She patted her son's cheeks before releasing from her embrace. Time seemed to return to normal, the waves crashed and the wind brought the smell of sea salt and warmth to Eren's senses.
"I don't know if I'm ready..." Eren looked up to the endless sky.
"Oh Eren, did you not listen to a word that Matthais said to you? You don't have to be alone on your journey." Her hand placed on Eren's shoulder.
"No matter what you do, I am, and will always be proud of you. You are my son, my sweet baby boy. Whenever, the world gets too hard to bear. Breathe deeply, count to ten and remember that you have people to rely on."
"Thanks mum." She kissed her son's forehead before letting go of her son.
A moment between mother and child. One that Eren will hold onto until the day comes when they will be reunited once more. And the next time it will not be temporary.
***
"You run out of power to quickly, elf." The ring spoke with glee, knowing that Baelor would soon have nothing else left.
The blue glow of the elven magic flickered, and the shadows around the guild grew stronger. The reaper would soon be able to use its shadows to its advantage.
Baelor stood with heavy breathing, even the great guild master struggled to maintain the stalemate. Cuts formed on his face; golden strands of hair fell freely with the wind.
Concrete slabs with deep trenches imbedded from a long gruelling fight. Jun and the other Silvermane knights stood by ready to aid their master when needed.
"It will take more than a scratch, foul beast."
"Come now... We are both beasts, are we not?"
The elven blade shined with an azure hue; primed once more to strike down the monster.
However, before the monster could strike. A thud from within, a beating heart brought heel to the beast of madness.
The monsters' eyes vanished. The mouth began to morph back to its original state. Once more did the white hair have life to its strands, a living though diminutive glow to the white.
"Eren!" A shout from Jun as the young man rushed forward.
Eren took of his mask; eyes a deep black. The pain had come with him.
Without even looking at the Silvermane, he left. Without a word or even a glance, he turned and disappeared into the dark of the ruins.
"Eren! Where are you going?" Jun was almost at Eren but the man vanished. No sound or smell, just like that. As though Eren wasn't even there to begin with. All that remained was a broken building of concrete.
"Jun..." An exhausted Baelor fell to one knee. Hand holding onto the wound on the side of the cheek. Blood flowed freely down to the cold stone. A tired smile as he looked at the young man.
"Leave him for now... Enough suffering for one night." A breathless Baelor laboured out to Jun.
"But we need-"
"It's okay." An outstretched hand from the guild master.
The Silvermane knights rushed to the aid of their Guildmaster. Jun stayed confused as Eren just left. Not even a reasoning as to why he let such a monster lose.
But those eyes of his; the depth of darkness in which they held. A pain so deep and intense.
What happened to him?
---
"Eren!" Emi rushed to her brother's side.
He had returned home late that evening. Near midnight, but the sister still waited for her brother.
"What happened?" She asked with a worried expression.
"..."
No words, simply walking by the little girl who waited all night for him to return.
"Eren!"
"..." He continued to walk past her, up the steps.
"Please, talk to me. Did I do something wrong?" Emi followed after Eren, not letting up. She was determined to get something from her brother.
Eren simply closed the door with a soft thud.
Now was not the time for talk. Now was the time to be left alone. To think and process.
*Thud* *Thud* *Thud*
"Eren..." A voice muffled behind a door. His little sister knocked to gain her brothers attention.
"Please... Say something." Her voice grew softer with each word. Tears formed in her eyes.
She didn't know the pain Eren was going through. The burden of what came next. But she wanted to help so much.
No, tonight... He needed rest. A new dawn will come soon, but for tonight, his own demons must be fought alone.