"I need to save BB! He's been corrupted by the enemy."
"Hold on there Harls. I don't you should–" Donna appeared behind her, stopping any act from the clown goddess.
"Hmm??? And what can you do to stop me? You are clearly weaker than me!" Harley said with a wicked smile as her eyes glinted, and she pulled a gun on Donna.
"Really?" Donna thought it over for a second too long, realizing too late who she was dealing with. She immediately put up her guard.
"BANG!" Harley shouted, and the gun shot out a pole with a paper attached like a flag, reading 'timeout.'
Suddenly, Donna's form began to fade, her protests echoing into the void. "What the fuck!!!" she exclaimed, attempting to hit Harley, but her fist phased right through her.
"That's the rule of this game! If I say timeout and you keep protesting, the condition for the timeout dimensional lock activates! You'll still be here, but not physically, and unable to affect the material realm as long as the timeout lasts. A new fun thing I realized I could do with my powers—neat, right?" Harley quipped, waving goodbye as Donna turned ghostly grey, her form becoming ethereal.
"Bitch. I'll get you for this," Donna pouted, frustration bubbling beneath the surface.
Meanwhile, in the Batcave, villainous laughter echoed, sending bats fluttering into darkness. Shazam, Black Adam, John Constantine, Etrigan, Talia, Ra's al Ghul, Damien, Nightwing, Beast Boy, Terra, Red Star, Blue Beetle, Jericho, and Aqualad paused, turning their attention to the source of the raucous noise as Batman finished strapping on his latest enchanted gear.
The first to appear were Harley's familiars—velveteen bat-shaped creatures, a blend of nightmare and cuteness, their toothy smiles echoing Harley's mischievous laughter. Suddenly, a bright light filled the room, revealing a crown glinting faintly above silver-blonde hair braided into twin pigtails—one dyed glossy black and the other a vibrant red.
Her alluring half-corset and micro skirt accentuated her figure, while her scepter added a regal touch, the crown hovering above her head. Harley had arrived!
"Fuck me…" Beast Boy cursed under his breath, recalling that Harley Quinn had somehow harnessed the most from Kyla-el's blessing, making her possibly the strongest among their ranks.
"Nah uh, BB! Not when you're fucking that slut!" Harley shouted, hovering above, finger pointed dramatically toward him as her familiars grinned wickedly.
"BB?" Terra's expression shifted to one of disbelief, slowly turning to face her lover, who wore a mask of fear. Though he had grown more powerful, the unpredictability of Harley sent a chill down his spine.
"Tell me…" Harley said, her laughter fading as her cherry-red lips formed a straight line of seriousness. "Have you turned traitor?"
"..."
Beast Boy clenched his fists, unable to respond.
"I see… so that's your answer? I might as well—" Harley began, but before she could finish, a black blur zipped past her. One of her familiars warned her just in time, while another unfurled into a protective barrier.
Lightning crackled in the cave as Batman, clad in heavy armor, soared through the air, trident in hand, sparking with electricity.
"Hahahaha! You take that, Harley!" Beast Boy cheered, his mood lifted.
"YEAH, BATMAN, HAHAHAHA!" Terra joined in, laughter rising.
"Hahahahaha… that was quick.. Hahahahahahahaha!" Aqualad chimed in, amusement bubbling over.
Harley's eyes narrowed at the unexpected ambush, but a low chuckle escaped her lips as she noticed Donna's ethereal form watching with folded arms, snickering at her predicament.
"Woah!" Harley darted athletically in the air, dodging a lightning strike from Black Adam, who attacked from a sitting position, finally deciding to join the fray.
Shazam rushed in next, appearing as a blur in front of Harley, unleashing a barrage of haymakers that cracked the air with thunderous force. Yet, Harley was nimble, expertly avoiding the strikes while her companions mocked Shazam, their laughter reminiscent of teenagers watching a senior make a fool of himself.
BAM!
"Home run!" Harley exclaimed, countering Shazam's attack with a swing of her scepter, sending him hurtling into Batman's arms.
Batman, receiving Shazam, found balloons in the shape of animals laughing and floating around them. Without skipping a beat, he morphed his gauntlets to a green and gold hue, enveloping the balloon constructs and releasing Shazam to catch himself.
"Huh?" Harley scratched her head, puzzled as to why her explosive constructs hadn't detonated. Batman had advanced his weaponry, morphing his trident into gauntlets to redirect her explosives elsewhere, leaving her baffled.
"Batsy flying and becoming stronger??? Hmm, something doesn't add up. Oh, well." Harley bit her cherry-red lips, her crown glowing with divine energy, plotting her next move.
"Let's play a game, Batsy… Rock, paper…" Harley began, twisting her wrist in a suggestive motion, as if teasingly demonstrating.
"Woah! EASY THERE! You could hurt someone with that!" she exclaimed, narrowly avoiding Black Adam's strike by placing a hand on his bald head, leaping over him like a streetball player, a real disrespectful move.
"Don't act surprised for too long, old man. If you're not smart and quick-witted, you won't last in Gotham. Heck, even a civi would expect you to sneak up on them. For goodness' sake, we have Batsy, who likes to fuck in the shadows, am I right?" Harley quipped, her laughter intertwining with the cacophony of giggles from the others.
Beast Boy struggled to fight against the laughter, trying to break free, while the rest remained ensnared
But just as she finished her taunt, Adam was caught off guard for a fraction too long. With a swift, calculated move, Harley countered, discombobulating him and sending him sprawling to the ground, effectively taking him out of the fight in an instant.in uncontrollable fits.
"Gymnastics really came in handy for my apotheosis, huh? You don't stretch much, do you? Too much muscle tightness, and you can't react as fast even if you are stronger." Harley surmised as a pair of glasses appeared and rested on the bridge of her nose and a clipboard floated next to her, as she caught Adam's limp body just before it hit the ground.
An unusual silence fell over John Constantine and Etrigan, the typically boisterous duo now muted, their expressions tense as they assessed the chaotic scene. Meanwhile, Shazam and Batman took up battle formations, ready to strike back.
"Shazam, get them all to Alfred! We need—" Batman began, his deep voice steady, but he was abruptly interrupted by a swirling blue mist.
Aquaman emerged, his presence commanding as he stepped into the fray.
"SEAMAN!!!!" Harley cheered, her previous psychiatrist cosplay disappeared, suddenly brandishing pom-poms that sparkled in the cave's dim light, shaking them enthusiastically. Arthur, despite the chaos, couldn't help but smile weirdly at the absurdity unfolding before him, witnessing his allies caught under Harley's spell, laughing uncontrollably as if on the brink of madness.
But as the laughter echoed around them, a sudden shift occurred. Damien pulled an injection from his belt, a glint of determination in his eyes as he sank the needle into his thigh. The pain forced him to go limp, his body collapsing as he fainted, the raucous laughter abruptly halting with him.
Nightwing, still caught in the throes of amusement, slowly began to fight back against Harley's influence. His laughter was a mere echo now, strained and fading as he struggled to regain control. Ra's al Ghul, too, took his time to steady his trembling hands, navigating through the residual laughter to find the pressure points on his body that would silence his mirth. With a few practiced motions, he finally managed to regain some composure, though his muscles remained tense, refusing to relax entirely. Talia, his daughter, mirrored his actions, following suit.
"Took you long enough," Batman remarked, hovering downward to meet Arthur, his keen gaze still tracking Harley, who held Black Adam's unconscious form in her grasp. "It seems you finally have a handle on your powers?"
"That, and a whole lot more," Arthur replied, a determined glint in his eyes. A puddle of water formed on the cave floor, shimmering as if alive. Suddenly, a sword broke the surface, hilt first, reflecting the faint light with an ethereal glow.
Arthur moved forward, his hand outstretched as he grasped the hilt of the sword. A dazzling light show erupted around him, illuminating the cave in a brilliance that momentarily drowned out the shadows. The air crackled with power, and an electric tension filled the room.
EXCALIBUR.
The name hung on everyone's lips, a whisper of reverence from those not lost to laughter. The legendary sword had risen, a symbol of hope and strength, resonating with the promise of victory.
As Arthur lifted Excalibur high, its blade gleamed with an otherworldly light, casting long shadows that danced across the cave walls. The atmosphere shifted, the laughter fading as the reality of their predicament solidified.
With a fierce determination, Arthur turned to face Harley, ready to unleash the might of Excalibur and confront the chaos that had enveloped Gotham. The battle was far from over, and with the legendary sword in hand, hope flickered back to life, poised to cut through the darkness.
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