She says these things now just to tell herself how much she wants their recognition! Perhaps these people don't know, but she understands how fortunate it is to be recognized by those around her.
She knows that from beginning to end, she has longed for this recognition, and even if in the end she has nothing, she still thinks this way. She knows she should live in the approval of others, perhaps she is just an insecure person, perhaps she just can't appreciate herself, but she simply loves doing anything for the approval of others.
She knows that if she can gain others' approval, if she can follow in their footsteps, she will ultimately become the kind of existence most deserving of respect.
"I thought you all were outstanding people, worthy of respect. Yet I find none of you are worthy of my respect in the end. What are you muddling through life for? Do you think you are worthy of others' respect now?"
