What exactly is the distance between life and death? No one knows, no one knows what they ultimately are supposed to gain that makes them want to compensate for it, and no one knows what they can actually do.
If companions can be loyal to themselves, then they are the ones who cause oneself grief. She felt that these people now are the ones causing her grief, causing her great sorrow.
"We can't find our direction forward, so don't search over there. Without knowing what could possibly complete oneself, don't strive for completion."
What she says now is actually meaningless because she doesn't know what she can do at the moment. If one day she ends up finding that she can get what she wants, it would be good, except everything she does now is a struggle. They can't achieve what they desire, can't find the best for themselves, can't become the person they wish to be.
