Fred and George gave the Extendable Ears a sharp tug and then Disapparated from the room. Seconds later, Molly appeared in the bedroom doorway, "The meeting's over, you can come down and have dinner now, everyone's dying to see you Harry. And who's left all those Dungbombs outside the kitchen door?"
"Crookshanks," Ginny said, unblushingly, "he loves playing with them."
"Oh," Molly said, "I thought it might have been Kreacher, he keeps doing odd things like that. Now don't forget to keep your voices down in the Hall. Ginny, your hands are filthy, what have you been doing? Go and wash them before dinner, please?"
Ginny grimaced at them and followed her mother out of the room. Jake looked at the window and saw a shadow fly over it. He walked towards it and looked through the dusty, grimy glass. It was only when the shadow passed over the window again that he realized it was a Raven. He opened the window quickly, "Chloe?" She flew towards the window and he moved out of her way as she flew into the room and perched beside Hedwig, "About time you got here."
She merely cawwed at him.
"Who's Kreacher?" Harry asked them after a moment.
"The House-Elf who lives here," Ron answered, "absolute nutter. I've never met one like him."
"He's not a nutter ," Hermione said, "he might have a few screws loose from being alone for so long, but he's not a nutter."
"His life ambition is to have his head severed and put on a plaque on the wall like his mother, Hermione, he's a nutter," Ron said.
"Like I said, he was alone for the entire time Sirius was in Azkaban, well... not alone , but he didn't have any real company..." Hermione said with a slight glare, "Dumbledore asked us to be kind to him, even if he's... rough around the edges..."
"Easier said than done," Ron said, "whatever, I'm starving, let's go." He led the way out of the room, with Jake leaving last, following Hermione out and onto the landing. But before they could descend the stairs, he sharply whispered, "Hold it... they're still in the Hall... we might be able to hear something."
The four of them looked cautiously over the banisters. The gloomy hallway below was packed with Witches and Wizards, including all of the ones that traveled with Jake and Harry on the way to Grimmauld Place. They were whispering excitedly together. In the very center of the group, Jake saw the greasy hair of one Severus Snape. He squinted his eye and briefly thought about finishing what he'd started last year.
They saw a thin piece of flesh-colored rope descending in front of them, and they looked up to see Fred and George on the landing above, carefully lowering the Extendable Ear towards the congregation of people below. It was all for nought, though, as the group migrated over to the front door, "Dammit," he heard Fred whisper as the Extendable Ear went back up.
The front door opened and closed in the span of a second, "Snape never eats here," Ron said quietly, "Thank Merlin... c'mon."
They quietly went down the stairs and saw Lupin, Tonks, and Molly sealing back the many locks and chains the door had on it, "We're eating down in the Kitchen," Molly said, meeting them at the bottom of the stairs, "if you'll tip-toe across the hall-"
A crash was heard from near the front door.
" Tonks !" Molly cried exasperatedly, turning to look back at her.
"I'm sorry!" Tonks wailed from her spot on the floor, "it's that stupid umbrella stand! That's the second time I've-" but the rest of her words were drowned out.
A horrible, ear-splitting, blood curdling screech entered Jake's ears. The moth-eaten velvet curtains they passed earlier had flung open to reveal a portrait of a woman in a black cap was screaming and screaming as though she was being tortured.
The old woman in the Portrait looked a little familiar, Jake thought. She was drooling and her eyes were rolling, the yellowing skin of her face stretched taut as she screamed, and all along the hall behind them, the other portraits awoke and began to yell too.
Jake closed his eye, grit his teeth, and clenched his hands as he recoiled slightly, lurching forward to withstand the deafening sounds.
Lupin and Molly rushed forward to try and tug the curtains closed again, but they were unable to, and she screeched louder and louder, brandishing clawed hands as though she were going to tear them apart, " FILTH ! SCUM ! BY-PRODUCTS OF DIRT AND VILENESS ! HALF-BREEDS, MUTANTS, FREAKS, MUDBLOODS, BEGONE FROM THIS PLACE ! HOW DARE YOU BEFOUL THE HOUSE OF MY FATHERS -"
Tonks apologized over and over again, at the same time dragging the huge, heavy troll's leg back off the floor. Molly abandoned her attempt at closing the curtain and went down the hall, Stunning all of the portraits with her wand. Then a man with a familiar head of long black hair came charging out of the door, "Shut up, you horrible old Hag, shut up!" Sirius roared, grabbing the curtain Molly abandoned.
The old woman's face blanched, " YOOOOOU !" She howled, her eyes popping at the sight of Sirius, " BLOOD TRAITOR, ABOMINATION, SHAME OF MY FLESH !"
"I said - shut - up!" He roared again and with a stupendous effort, he and Lupin were able to close the curtain. The old woman's screeches died and an echoing silence fell. Panting slightly and sweeping his long dark hair out of his eyes, Harry's Godfather, Sirius, turned to face him, "Hello, Harry," he said grimly, "I see you've met my mother."
"Your-"
"My dear old mum, yeah," Sirius said, scrunching up his nose, "We've been trying to get her down for a month, but we think she put a Permanent Sticking Charm on the back of the canvas."
"I'm sure it's not that permanent," Jake said, feeling a sudden urge to destroy the painting in a grandiose display of fire and fury.
Sirius gave him a look, "Maybe you're just what we need to remove her from the wall... I don't even care how you do it, I just want to see her gone... well, come on, let's get downstairs quick, before they all wake up again."
"But, what's a portrait of your mother doing here?" Harry asked, bewildered.
"Isn't it obvious, Harry?" Jake asked as they went through the door from the hall and down a narrow flight of stone steps, "This is the House of Black."
"He's right," Sirius said, "this was my parents house, but I guess it's mine now, seeing as I'm the last alive Black - well... sort of."
"What do you mean sort of ?" Harry asked him.
"I'll explain that another day, but seeing as this is mine, I offered it to Dumbledore as a Headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix - about the only useful thing I've been able to do," Sirius sighed and when they got down to the bottom of the stairs, Sirius turned to Harry and suddenly pulled him into tight hug, "I'm sorry," he said.
Jake watched as Harry returned the hug and he could've sworn he saw a few tears escape from Harry's eyes in the dim light. The basement kitchen they found themselves in which was scarcely less gloomy than the hall above, a cavernous room with rough stone walls. Most of the light was coming from a large fire at the far end of the room. A haze of pipe smoke hung in the air like battle fumes, through which loomed the menacing shapes of heavy iron pots and pans hanging from the dark ceiling. Many chairs had been crammed into the room for the meeting and a long wooden table stood in the middle of the room, littered with rolls of parchment, goblets, empty wine bottles, and a heap of what appeared to be rags. Arthur and Bill were talking quietly with their heads together at the end of the table.
Molly cleared her throat. Arthur, a thin, balding, red-haired man, who wore horn-rimmed glasses, looked around and jumped to his feet, "Harry!" Arthur said, hurrying forward to greet him and shook his hand vigorously, "Good to see you!"
Jake saw Bill hurriedly rolling up parchments left on the table. He was going to get answers, one way or another, "Journey all right, Harry?" Bill called, trying to gather up twelve scrolls at once, "Mad-Eye didn't make you come via Greenland, then?"
"He tried," Tonks said, striding over to help Bill and immediately sending a candle toppling onto the last piece of parchment, "Oh no - sorry -"
"Here, dear," Molly said, sounding exasperated, and she repaired the parchment with a wave of her wand. In the flash of light caused by the wand, Jake saw something that looked like the plan of a building. Molly caught him looking and snatched the plan off the table and stuffed it into Bill's heavily laden arms, "This sort of thing ought to be cleared away promptly at the end of meetings," she snapped.
"Why?" Jake asked.
No one, however, answered him, which ticked him off. Bill took his wand out and muttered, " Evanesco ," and the scrolls vanished.
"Sit down, Harry," Sirius said, "You've met Mundungus, haven't you?"
"You mean the piece of shit who was supposed to be watching Harry when the Dementor showed up?" Jake asked and everyone suddenly looked as though they were ready to calm him down.
"Some'n say m' name?" Mundungus mumbled sleepily, "I 'gree with Sirius..."
He raised a very grubby hand in the air as though voting, his droopy, bloodshot eyes unfocused. Ginny merely giggled at his incompetence.
"The meeting's over, Dung," Sirius said as they all sat down around him at the table, "Harry's arrived."
Jake glared at Mundungus the entire time, "Eh?" Mundungus asked, peering balefully at Harry through his matted ginger hair, "Blimey, so 'e 'as. Yeah... you all right, 'arry?"
"Yeah, I'm fine, except for getting in trouble with the Ministry because of you," Harry said, not holding back how he felt about the man. He clearly looked like he didn't want to bring it up, but Jake knew Harry.
He fidgeted nervously as he pulled out a grimy black pipe. He stuck it in his mouth, ignited the end of it with his wand, and took a deep pull on it. Great billowing clouds of greenish smoke obscured him in seconds, "Yeah... owe you a 'pology..." his voice grunted from the middle of the smelly cloud.
"For the last time, Mundungus," Molly called to him, "will you please not smoke that thing in the kitchen, especially not when we're about to eat!"
"Ah," Mundungus said, "right. Sorry, Molly." The cloud of smoke vanished as Mundungus stowed his pipe back in his pocket, but an acrid smell of burning socks lingered.
"And if you want dinner before midnight, I'll need a hand," Molly said to the large room, "No, you can stay where you are, Harry dear, you've had a long journey." Jake had stood up to help, but Molly acted like he hadn't traveled with Harry too. He felt like he stepped into the twilight zone or something with how everyone was acting with him. He still bounded forward at the same time Tonks did, but he didn't get very far from his chair.
"What can I do, Molly?" She asked.
"Er - no, it's alright, Tonks," Molly said, looking apprehensive, "you have a rest too, you've done enough today."
Jake decided to go and get plates out instead of helping with dinner, because he remembered that Molly liked to cook with magic, whereas he did not, "For the record," Hermione whispered to him as they gathered plates, "the food has yet to taste anywhere near as good as what you made while i was at the Tower," she winked at him, causing him to smile.
While they were busy with the plates and silverware, they heard a shrieking Molly, "Fred - George - NO, JUST CARRY THEM!"
Both Hermione and Jake turned around just in time to see Harry, Sirius, and Mundungus dive away from the table as a large Cauldron of stew, an iron flagon of butterbeer, and a heavy wooden breadboard, complete with knife, hurtle hurtle through the air towards them. Jake didn't have the time to save the stew entirely, but he extended his hand and the stew, butterbeer, and breadboard with all of its contents, floated in the air, including the liquid and stew that hadn't hit the table. Everything moved upright, and liquid floating went into its proper container, and it was set gently on the half of the table not covered in a black burn on the wooden table.
Harry and Sirius were laughing as Molly began yelling, "FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE! THERE WAS NO NEED - I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS! JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE ALLOWED TO DO MAGIC NOW DOESN'T MEAN YOU NEED TO WHIP YOUR WANDS OUT FOR EVERY LITTLE THING!"
"We were just trying to save a bit of time!" Fred said in a loud voice. He quickly apologized to his mother before turning to Sirius, "Sorry, Sirius, mate - didn't mean to ruin the table..."
"Boys, your mothers right," Arthur chimed in finally, "You're supposed to show a sense of responsibility now that you've come of age."
"None of your brother's caused this sort of trouble!" Molly yelled, slamming a fresh flagon of butterbeer, and almost spilled more than half of it, but Jake kept it from flying everywhere, "Bill didn't feel the need to Apparate every few feet! Charlie didn't Charm everything he met! Percy-" Molly stopped yelling and caught her breath, looking at her husband, who had a wooden expression on his face.
"Let's eat," Bill said quickly.
"It looks wonderful, Molly," Lupin said, ladling the stew onto a plate for her and placing it across the table.
For a few minutes, there was silence, except for the chink of plates and cutlery, and the scraping of chairs as everyone settled at the table. Hermione sat on Jake's right, just as she always did, and he sat as far left as he could at the table, so he wouldn't have to turn his head very far to talk to someone. If it weren't for the fact Hermione liked sitting near the center of the Gryffindor's Table at Hogwarts, he'd always sit at the end of the table.
Molly turned to Sirius, "I've been meaning to tell you, there's something trapped in that writing desk in the drawing room, it keeps rattling and shaking. Of course, it could just be a Boggart, but I thought we ought to ask Alastor to have a look at it before we let it out."
"I can take a look at it right now and we can get it out of the way?" Jake offered.
"Oh, don't be silly, I would never ask you to do that," Molly said, shaking her head.
"Nonsense, I'll go take care of it," Jake said and stood up from the table, "My Boggart is only a Dementor anyway."
"But-" Molly was about to speak.
Lupin, however, cut in, "If there is anyone in this room I trust to deal with a Dementor, it'd be Jake and Harry, but maybe... after what happened a few days ago, Jake should definitely be the one to deal with it."
"What if it's not a Dementor!?" She asked exasperatedly.
"Jake is the most capable Wizard in this room right now to deal with Magical Creatures. From what I was told about last year, you proved exceptionally well and capable in your Defense Class with Top Marks," Lupin smirked.
"Oh, fine," Molly relented.
"I'll be back," he said to Hermione and left the room.
Molly continued after he left, "The curtains in there are full of Doxies too, I thought we might try tackling them tomorrow."
"I look forward to it," Sirius said in a sarcastic tone that Molly didn't pick up on.
Hermione looked at Tonks and saw she was changing her nose, and Hermione's attention was caught. She then requested her favorite nose from Tonks, "Do that one like a Pig Snout, Tonks! Please?"
She scrunched up her face with a pained expression and her nose was a Pig's Snout. She began to laugh, having to cover her mouth as she had just gotten a bite. She swallowed her food and she heard Mundungus speaking loudly about something, "-and then, if you'll believe me, 'e says to me, 'e says, ' 'ere Dung, where didja get all them toads from? 'Cos some son of a Bludger's gone and nicked all mine!' And I says-"
Before he could continue his story, a loud explosion was heard from somewhere above them, "Jake," Hermione said breathlessly as she bolted towards the door, everyone getting up and following her.
*******
Jake had just left the kitchen and began to make his way up the stairs to find the Drawing Room. He forgot to ask where it was, so he carefully checked each room two floors up while listening for rattling and shaking.
He had heard it up another floor from a room he had been busy checking. He walked back out into the hall and counted four rooms down on the left side of the hall, looking from the stairs. He walked up the creaky staircase, each step seemed like it creaked louder than the last. There were no pictures or décor of any sort in the stairwell, not that he was complaining. It was better than seeing a lot of doors that led to death traps.
When he got to the next floor, it had a few things decorating the hall. No paintings or portraits, but there was the occasional plant on a wall planter. As long as none of them were a Tentacula, he didn't care what they were.
He stopped outside the fourth door on his left and the rattling was heard from within the room. He pushed it open and waited for the rattle again. While he waited, he looked at the room; it was long and high-ceilinged with olive green walls covered in dirty tapestries. The carpet exhaled little clouds of dust every step he took, and the long, moss-green velvet curtains were buzzing with what he assumed to be doxies. He looked right at the Writing Desk, and when it shook violently, he smirked.
He walked a few steps in, and pulled his wand out. The drawer flung open, but no Dementor came from the desk, instead it was Hermione. He stood there, dumbstruck, "Hermione?" He couldn't understand why she was his Boggart.
The Boggart-Hermione looked at him with a blank, almost dead expression. Her skin looked off, it wasn't the lovely, smooth skin Hermione had; it was slightly grayed, and he noticed it was graying more and more, slowly, with every passing second.
He looked back at her face and there were spots on her face. Looking at them, they looked a little wrinkly, and started to decay.
Maybe it was just because it was dark, " Lumos ," he said and his wand tip lit up, bathing Hermione in light, and he immediately wished he hadn't. She looked even worse, her skin was obviously grayed, and it even looked decayed and was falling off her arms and face.
He looked back up to her face and her eyes looked dead; a worm pushing out of her pupil and going in between the eye and her eyelid. She opened her mouth and her teeth started to fall out, but there was no blood, nothing came from her rotten looking gums when a tooth fell out. Her hair was falling out too, some of it fell off with parts of her scalp still attached.
Her nose fell apart, each nostril wrinkling and small pieces fell to the floor. A sickly greenish substance began oozing from her nose.
Jake didn't understand at first. It was when her head rolled off backwards to the floor, as her body fell forward and her limbs fell off her torso, that he realized what the had Boggart shown him. It both terrified and infuriated him. His eye glowed red as he roared in anger and agony. The Boggart and the Writing Desk it had been hiding in were engulfed in an explosion, the wooden floor, ceiling, and walls near the desk splintering a bit from the force of the explosion. Dust and debris covered the room as footsteps were heard running down the hall.
The door opened and he heard a chorus of coughs erupt somewhere behind him. The dust was whisked away and someone, he couldn't tell who, had walked up to him and he heard a feminine gasp. Everyone rushed into the room and he could barely make out more footsteps running down the Hall. He was surrounded, he could feel multiple presences, but none dared get too close. What had happened, he had thought to himself, but his vision was blurry, his hearing was deafened slightly, he felt no pain. He thought for a moment that he could be dead, and his body just hadn't registered it yet, but that didn't make sense, and he was a logical person, or he tried to be.
He looked in front of him, and he could make out one person because of the brown bushy hair, "Hermione..." He said, or thought he said, he wasn't sure at first. When she moved closer to him, he realized he was vocal about her name. He had to make sure she was okay, "Closer..." She seemed to hesitate, but she got closer to him, and his vision cleared enough to see her face, "Good... you're okay..."
"I'm oka - Jake, you - you've been pierced with large chunks of wood in at least four spots..." Hermione began to tear up as blood slowly poured from his mouth, 'He's been mortally injured, and the first thing he cares about is me...' "Jake..." Hermione cried into her palms. He had been hit by the Writing Desk that he blew up: a large chunk of wood was impaled through his left shoulder; another piece was in his right leg, which Hermione figured might be through his femur; a third large piece was in his stomach, which was bleeding rather quickly; the fourth large piece was through the right side of his chest, likely into his lung, which Hermione figured was causing the blood to come from his mouth. This wasn't counting the many small pieces in his arms, legs, torso, and face. None of them hit his remaining eye, which Hermione was ever so thankful for.
"Everyone... leave..." Jake said, "Hermione can stay... if she wants..."
Molly was about to argue, but Sirius and Remus both quickly ushered her out. Everyone but Hermione left with great reluctance. "Jake?" He carefully raised a hand and his eye was glowing red as he cut his shirt off his body, revealing the damage to be way worse than Hermione initially believed. "Jake, you need to go to Saint Mungo's-"
"No... I can heal this... I just need some help... getting this wood out..." He said in a pained voice.
Hermione walked forward and carefully and slowly removed each piece of wood, one by one, when he told her to. Hermione could only figure he'd read the Advanced Healing Magic book and would know what he was doing. With each piece of wood pulled from his body, he slowly moved his hand into each wound, and when he finished inside, he slowly moved his hand over each open wound, and it healed right before Hermione's eyes. When his face, arms, and torso were done, he cut off his pants, leaving him in only his boxers. Hermione was too worried about him to think much of it right then, pulling the wood slowly from his legs. He healed each spot until his legs were good. She noticed before he had begun to heal his legs at all the old looking wounds that were there, as there were many places that just didn't have any hair growing on them, 'What has he been through?'
He looked at his boxers, "You can turn around if you want..."
Hermione was about to turn around, but she steeled her nerves and stayed facing him, her cheeks already going red before he even moved his boxers down to check the damage down there. When he did push them down to his ankles, she saw his flaccid sex organ, which had been hit by some shrapnel. His scrotum was okay, and that seemed to be his main concern as she watched him carefully look over his private area. Aside from concern for him, she had a few things racing through her mind, 'He's obviously a grower, not a shower... his flaccid self is about five centimeters in length... I can only imagine what his fully erect size is... and he's been circumcised... the head is visible... if it weren't so serious right now... the things I'd offer to do to him...' being the main things on her mind.
He healed the minor damage he found down there and pulled his boxers back up. He used Reparo on both his pants and shirt and put them back on with Hermione's help, "Thank you... I don't think I could've done that without you..." he cupped her face and kissed her sensually and lovingly, none the wiser to the sexual tension Hermione was feeling.
She kissed him back, a moan escaping from her throat, and they parted a moment later, "I love you," she whispered to him.
"I love you too... and only you, every single second of every single day, I will always love you, Hermione," he said and she blushed and smiled at him.
He started to walk towards the door and was limping from his injuries; he might have healed them, but the pain lingered. Hermione helped him to the door and he opened it to see everyone standing out there.
"Is Dinner still warm?" He asked humorlessly and pushed past them to go back down the stairs, not waiting for an answer. They were all speechless, looking at Hermione as she shrugged and followed Jake. She didn't know what happened, and she wasn't going to pressure Jake into telling her what happened. She would let him talk at his own pace, it was the absolute very least she could do for him after all he'd done for her.
'He's gone through so much abuse in his lifetime... he deserves a break, he deserves some reprieve... and he deserves to be loved... I can at least make sure he has that last one,' she thought to herself as everyone followed them back down the stairs, muttering quietly about what happened inside that room, something they will never find out about.