June 1992
The sea breeze whistled, brushing through the blonde hair of a young man running with the vigor of his youth. The young man stopped to gaze in awe at the blue sea. His feet were already wet up to his knees from the seawater, grains of white sand scattered around his feet and the trousers he was wearing.
A white seagull swooped low over the vast expanse of seawater, gradated with the bright colors of the sky surrounded by floating clouds ahead.
The Promenade Beach in Yantarny, Kaliningrad Oblast, was so mesmerizing that a sweet smile never left his face. As a wave came crashing against his feet, his balance wavered slightly; he instinctively stepped back and bumped into the back of a young man behind him.
"Careful! The waves are a bit strong here," said the young man, warning him while holding the shoulder of Noel, who had just bumped into him.
"This is my first time seeing the sea, so I got carried away with joy," said Noel, the young man with blonde hair, half-shouting because the noisy gusts of wind slightly muffled his voice.
Noel left Alexei's side as his attention was caught by a twig. An idea crossed his mind, and he then drew something in the sand.
"What are you drawing?" asked Alexei, curious.
Without looking back, Noel replied, "You can see in a moment."
It didn't take long for the sand drawing to be finished.
Alexei almost let out a laugh, had he not quickly covered his mouth with the back of his hand. Noel, on the other hand, looked at his work with pride. A sketch of two people kissing was clearly drawn on the sand. If you looked longer, the drawing wasn't too bad either.
"Wow... I'm jealous just looking at it," Alexei commented on the sketch of the two people kissing.
Hearing that, Noel turned to the side, glancing at the young man who was engrossed in looking at his work. And a second later, Alexei flinched as he felt a brief peck land right on his right cheek. He immediately turned his head—finding Noel grinning back at him.
"You're not jealous anymore, are you?" he asked.
Instead of answering, Alexei immediately returned Noel's peck with a light kiss right on the lips.
"Now we're even, right?" Alexei continued with a triumphant smile.
Stunned for a moment. Unconsciously, Noel's fingertip gently touched his own lips. He was sure his face must be flushed right now. Noel suddenly felt shy. He had intended to tease Alexei, but the situation turned around like a boomerang—he was the one being teased now, even though Alexei probably hadn't meant to tease him at all.
For Noel, the kiss from the young man wasn't his first kiss, but it was the first kiss that made his heart beat uncontrollably.
Ignoring the beauty of nature, Alexei chose to enjoy Noel's face. Before that, he swallowed a lump of saliva, moistening his dry throat.
Noel turned his body fully to face Alexei.
Taking Noel's right hand, Alexei briefly enjoyed the tickle of Noel's warm breath caressing his skin between the gusts of sea wind, quickening the heartbeat in his chest.
"I like you," Alexei said suddenly.
Noel was shocked, his eyes widening—staring at the pair of hazel irises that were currently looking into his blue eyes. Did Noel hear correctly what Alexei had just said?
"I like you," he repeated, the words he had kept in his heart finally revealed.
"I-I... but I'm a boy!" Noel replied nervously, at a loss.
A soft laugh followed the next moment. "So am I," Alexei continued, a hint of a joke in his voice. "But... is that wrong?"
Noel blinked, staring at Alexei with confusion evident in his blue eyes. He was happy right now, but on the other hand, he felt this was rushed. Noel realized they were still seventeen—and one thing weighing on his mind was that they were both boys. Love between the same gender is complicated, according to Noel. It requires commitment and a strong resolve to stay together.
Right now, it was very difficult for him to answer the young man's invitation. However, on the other hand, his heartbeat pounded against his eardrums strongly. Maybe Noel would go deaf from his own heartbeat.
"My mother once told me, if you like someone, no matter how heavy your heart is to say it to that person, just say it. It's better than keeping it bottled up."
Noel listened.
"I'm not a poetic person, not romantic either, so I express my feelings with simple words." Alexei laughed a little. "Those words, so easy to say but apparently hard to do." He looked down for a moment at the sand beneath his feet, then back at Noel.
Silence lingered for a few seconds between them, before...
"I'm willing."
Because of his nervousness, Noel didn't realize his mouth had said that. As soon as the answer was out, he immediately realized—that Alexei was asking him to be his lover, not his husband.
Noel turned his face away from the hazel eyes that reflected his own, out of embarrassment.
"So you're willing?" Alexei looked at Noel with a sparkle in his eyes. His hand moved to touch Noel right where his heart was pounding—before bringing the young man's body into his embrace. "Let me have everything that is yours, and I will also give everything that is mine."
In the embrace of the young man who had become his lover just moments ago, Noel chuckled. This was the first time someone had confessed their feelings to him. He felt something in his chest that wouldn't stop beating. Something he found strange, but there was an immense feeling of happiness mixed in.
Noel returned Alexei's embrace, whispering in the young man's ear. "From now on, you're mine." His face was flushed, hidden in the crook of Alexei's neck.
Alexei released his hug. "And now, I promise I will protect you with my life, I won't let anyone hurt you."
"You're exaggerating."
"I'm serious, you can hold me to my promise. I'll be your bulletproof vest."
"Alright... I trust you." Their embrace broke apart. And at that very moment, Noel pushed Alexei until his body lost its balance and slipped. Seawater immediately soaked parts of his body and clothes. Meanwhile, the culprit ran off before he could be retaliated against.
"Noel! You'd better watch out!" Alexei, unwilling to lose, immediately got up to chase Noel.
It was responded to with laughter.
The sea breeze blew in early summer. On the coastline, two long shadows moved, chasing each other. Meanwhile, the sun sank further toward the ocean's horizon. In the distance, waves rolled in, welcoming the rising tide.
*
Sunday
Noel was busy with his work routine at a café called HOPE Caffe. Even after the sun reached the end of the afternoon to set.
Smiling toward the sunset that brought out orange rays, Noel remembered again the face of a handsome young man who had shouted, "I like you," against a beautiful backdrop; the moments of the sun setting over the ocean with orange gradations.
The doorbell chimed. Welcoming a young man who was a customer wearing a short-sleeved flannel shirt, a white t-shirt as an undershirt, and jeans hugging his slender legs.
The young man ordered a latte, a sandwich, and bacon lettuce tomato to the female worker in a pastel uniform who asked as soon as he arrived at the cash register. After that, the young man walked to a table with two white chairs by the window. His long legs tapped the floor tiles at a leisurely pace; he pulled out a chair to sit down and gazed at the activities outside the window.
In less than three minutes, his order arrived, delivered by a sweet-faced young man. The aroma of coffee and toasted bread with slices of tomato, lettuce, and bacon spread with mayonnaise wafted through the air. Quickly, Alexei shifted his attention to the employee. "Thank you, darling."
Noel, who had been looking down, was startled by the familiar baritone voice greeting him. His eyes blinked as his attention caught the sight of a handsome young man throwing a charming smile at him. Blue and hazel eyes met for a few moments before breaking away.
"What are you doing here?" Noel asked, forgetting that his lover had come to fill his stomach.
"What am I doing? Of course, to have dinner. I'm very hungry," Alexei laughed, leaving the latte and bacon lettuce tomato sandwich aside for a moment. "And of course... to see my sweetheart here," he continued between laughs, bringing a blush to Noel's cheeks.
Alexei grabbed a fork and cut the sandwich into small pieces to eat. "Don't you want to join me? Or should I order something for you?" he asked.
Noel smiled and shook his head. "I'm working overtime today, so I'll be home later," he explained, telling his lover not to wait for him as usual.
Alexei understood, even if only with a nod, swallowing the sandwich in his mouth. "Don't push yourself too hard!"
Alexei's advice successfully filled Noel with enthusiasm. The young man left after Alexei stood up from his chair, not to leave, but to reach the top of Noel's head—who was no taller than him—and ruffle his blonde hair affectionately before its owner left to go back to work.
In between serving customers, Noel sat in the corner of the café kitchen, bending his knees on a slightly wobbly plastic chair. A half-eaten sandwich lay on the plate in front of him.
"You've been different lately," commented Irina, his coworker who was a few years older. Her eyes narrowed with curiosity as she leaned her shoulder against the doorframe.
Noel looked up, his brow furrowing. "What do you mean?"
"You're smiling. And this is your fourteenth minute of break, and you've only finished half a sandwich." Irina approached, sitting in the chair across from him. "Usually you finish in ten minutes."
Noel opened his mouth to argue, but the words got stuck in his throat. He realized that Irina was right. The past few weeks, he had felt the same hunger, but something else filled his stomach—something that made an ordinary sandwich taste sweeter, and made his short break feel sufficient.
"It's okay," Irina said, smiling as she rose from her chair. "Just enjoy it. You deserve to be happy."
She left, leaving Noel still silent, now realizing that his smile indeed hadn't really disappeared since Alexei picked him up at the bus stop a week ago.
*
Night was advancing as the roar of motorcycles and the chatter of a few people slipped into Noel's ears as he walked out of the café where he worked. Midnight was just an hour away, and his eyes were filled with exhaustion.
What a tiring day. While some people spent their only day off in the week resting their aching bodies, Noel had to work to meet his living expenses in the big city with its high cost of living.
As usual on ordinary days, Noel came home through the café's back door carrying his backpack containing a change of clothes. On weekdays other than weekends, the backpack would contain textbooks. During work breaks, the young man usually ate while doing homework. So after he got home, Noel would clean up and then sleep.
Dragging his feet to walk under the moonlight, Noel glanced left and right. The trauma from the bullying by three delinquent young men a few weeks ago still lingered in his memory. If Batman hadn't shown up at that time, Noel didn't know what would have become of him.
The first time they met, when Alexei helped him, Noel considered Alexei the Batman in his life.
Just as he was about to pass an alley, Noel quickened his pace. However, unexpectedly, a hand pulled his body and hugged him from behind. Noel was shocked, about to scream, but his scream got stuck in his throat as a soft baritone whispered in his ear.
"Shhh... it's me," Alexei said.
In an instant, his frightened expression changed. A smile immediately spread; Noel turned around and hugged Alexei back tightly.
"You scared me," Noel complained, pouting his lips adorably.
"Did I scare you? I'm sorry, I just wanted to surprise you," Alexei regretted after briefly kissing Noel's pouting lips.
"Don't make that face! You're making me want to eat you," Alexei teased between laughs. Their embrace broke apart.
"I'm not food, I don't taste good," Noel replied, not understanding what Alexei meant by wanting to eat him.
A week into their relationship, Alexei still hadn't touched Noel. At most, only hugs and kisses on the lips.
Noel was given the leather jacket that had been framing Alexei's body. The warmth from the young man's body still lingered in his jacket. After Noel put it on, Alexei handed him a helmet again.
"Aren't you cold just wearing that t-shirt?" Noel asked anxiously, looking at his lover who was only clad in a black long-sleeved t-shirt that covered almost up to his knuckles—after giving away his leather jacket so the sweet young man wouldn't be cold.
Alexei smiled. "No, besides, this t-shirt is thick too," he replied as he got on his motorcycle, followed by Noel on the pillion seat.
Noel hugged Alexei's waist as the engine started and the bike moved at a moderate speed toward their destination.
[•°]