The morning brought a sense of urgency. The kiss from last night replayed in my mind non-stop. I rose early, dressed quickly, and headed straight for the kitchens. Nadia was already there, directing the staff with her usual infectious energy.
"Nadia, can I talk to you?" I asked, pulling her aside.
Her brow furrowed with concern. "Of course, Isabella. What's wrong? You look like you haven't slept."
"I haven't," I admitted. "It's about Torrance."
Her eyes lit up with a mischievous gleam. "Ah, the brooding bodyguard. What did he do? Finally confess his undying love while dramatically saving you from a rogue squirrel?"
I couldn't help but smile at her teasing. "It's…complicated. We kissed last night."
Nadia gasped, clapping her hands together. "Finally! I knew there was something there. So, what's the problem? Did he turn into a frog at midnight?"
"No, it's not that," I said, feeling a knot of anxiety tighten in my stomach. "It was…intense. And I don't know if I'm ready for this. I'm a queen, Nadia. I have responsibilities. Can I really afford to fall for someone like him?"
Nadia's expression softened, her playful demeanor fading. "Isabella, love doesn't care about titles or responsibilities. It just…is. And you deserve to be happy. You deserve to have someone who loves you fiercely, who protects you, who makes you feel alive."
Her words resonated with me, echoing the desires I had tried so hard to suppress. "But he's so…dark. He lives in the shadows. I don't even know everything about him." I confessed. "I'm also worried he won't love Athenia the way he should. I want her to have a good dad."
"And you think you can only love someone who is 'perfect'?" Nadia asked, raising her eyebrow. "No one is perfect Isabella. You fell in love with Torrance for a reason. Remember that. You have to see if the two of you can make it work but at least try, you know?"
"Just be honest with him, Isabella. Tell him your fears, your doubts. And listen to what he has to say. Love is about communication, about compromise."
I nodded slowly, her words making sense. I couldn't let my fear dictate my decisions. I had to be brave, both as a queen and as a woman.
"You're right," I said, a newfound determination rising within me. "I need to talk to him. To be honest with him."
"That's my girl," Nadia said, squeezing my hand. "Now, go find him. And tell him Nadia says he better treat you like the queen you are, or he'll have to answer to me."
I laughed, feeling a weight lift from my shoulders. With Nadia's support, I felt ready to face Torrance, to face whatever the future held. I thanked Nadia and went to go find him. Wilson told me that Torrance was in the training area. I headed towards the courtyard, where the rhythmic clang of steel against steel filled the air.
Torrance was there, sparring with Grayson, their movements a blur of controlled power. I watched them for a moment, mesmerized by their strength and skill. Even in the midst of combat, Torrance exuded an aura of dark intensity that drew me in. It was hard not to stare but I needed to talk to him.
As soon as Grayson and Torrance stopped, I approached them. "Torrance, can we talk?" I took a deep breath. "In private?" He gave Grayson a nod before following me to the gardens. He stopped me by grabbing my hand softly. He brushed his thumb back and forth on my knuckles. "Is everything alright?" He asked softly. I nodded softly. "Can we go somewhere more private to talk?" I asked softly. He nodded his head. He took my hand and then took me to his chambers. I looked around at his chambers, it was dark, it was like him and the only light was peering through the curtains. I took a deep breath and turned around. Where do I even start?