Buzz~
As the sacred gourd trembled, the relentless waves calmed. Charlie summoned the gourd back, its mouth unleashing a torrent of Water Demon chi that surged into his body.
"Hahaha! My fate is mine, not the heavens'!"
"Eat it already!"
Charlie snapped, urging Corrupted Charlie to absorb the chi without wasting a drop.
Soon, when the gourd could no longer release any chi, Corrupted Charlie went silent. Charlie sent the gourd back into the void.
Meanwhile, Arthur and Atlanna had brought Namor to Wakanda's shore.
Surrounded by Wakandan soldiers, Arthur rubbed his red ears, glaring at the "primitive" soldiers.
He was itching to vent his frustration!
But as T'Challa arrived, clapping and smiling in welcome, the tension eased.
"I know you, friend. You must be Spider-Man's ally, right?"
Wakanda was isolated, but not ignorant of the outside world.
T'Challa had done his homework on Spider-Man.
When G'iah tried to conquer Earth, Spider-Man stepped up, summoning many allies.
The gold-scaled warrior and the silver-scaled woman before him were in the files.
He extended a warm welcome, and the soldiers lowered their guard.
Arthur, unable to lash out, stepped back.
Atlanna took over, engaging T'Challa.
To her, human kings were no big deal.
Even the richest nation was nothing compared to Atlantis, which owned the entire ocean. Seabed minerals might not match vibranium in quality, but their quantity more than made up for it.
Unfazed, Atlanna's presence even overshadowed T'Challa, making him instinctively tense.
Before he could defuse the awkward vibe, the invincible Spider-Man returned.
Seeing Charlie, Arthur didn't hesitate. "Father!"
T'Challa: "???"
He froze. Spider-Man has a kid?
Catching Atlanna's affectionate gaze, he sensed a juicy secret.
"Thank you, Mr. Spider-Man, for saving Wakanda again."
T'Challa chose to ignore the bombshell and thanked Charlie, prompting the soldiers to cheer wildly.
"Spider-Man forever!"
"Wakanda forever!"
"Spider-Man forever!"
"Stop, stop, this cringey dialogue!"
Charlie rubbed his forehead, unable to stomach the feudal vibes.
He waved Atlanna and Arthur toward the palace.
"Father, what about this guy?" Arthur hoisted Namor.
Charlie thought for a moment. "Send him to S.H.I.E.L.D."
Arthur nodded, knowing S.H.I.E.L.D. was this world's hero organization.
"Wait."
Namor interjected, sneering, "What crime are you pinning on me? Harboring a demon?"
S.H.I.E.L.D. could handle human heroes, but not interdimensional demons or underwater civilizations!
Charlie gave him one line.
"Illegal construction under the sea. That enough for you?"
Namor: "…"
Humans have no shame. Who says that?
So shameless!
"Damn Spider-Man, kill me if you dare, or my people will come for you!"
Namor cursed as Arthur dragged him away. Charlie rolled his eyes.
Anyone who's been Spider-Man's friend knows he, like Batman, doesn't kill.
Merfolk are people too.
…
That night, in Wakanda's palace:
Spider-Man had ended the monster crisis on his first day, so T'Challa threw a citywide celebration. A particle hologram of Spider-Man hung in the sky, revered by all Wakandans.
Charlie couldn't handle it.
"This… you didn't need to go this over-the-top," he told T'Challa.
T'Challa smiled mysteriously. "I understand."
When Spider-Man says "no need," it means it's not enough!
Everyone knows Spider-Man's vanity.
With a wave, another firework burst, framing Spider-Man's hologram with a dazzling backdrop.
Charlie: "…"
"Mr. Spider-Man, satisfied?" T'Challa asked.
Charlie covered his face. "Very satisfied."
Behind him, Arthur beamed with pride.
"As expected of Father. Like me, he loves this low-key style."
Charlie shot him a side-eye.
"What has your mother been teaching you all these years?" His gaze was resentful.
Arthur replied earnestly, "She taught me fighting, swimming, painting, acting, shooting, and hide-and-seek.
Yeah, hide-and-seek's her favorite. She also told me about your epic love story. I'm so jealous."
He turned to Atlanna, whose grim face softened into a kind smile. "Dear Mother, can I have my trident back?"
Atlanna nodded, tossing it to him.
"Good boy. You spoke the truth."
She looked at Charlie. "You haven't sent us back, so you must need our help, right?" Her tone was certain.
Charlie frowned, then scoffed. "What do you take the invincible Spider-Man for? I'd only call you when I need something? Can't I just want to catch up and bond?"
Atlanna kept smiling. "If that's the case, I'll just bond with you and help with nothing else."
"Well, no need to draw such a hard line."
Charlie gave a sheepish grin. "Have Arthur talk to the sea creatures. Ask if they've seen or encountered anything weird in the ocean, like this."
He conjured a wisp of demonic chi. "The ocean's vast. Those guys are likely hiding in it."
"What's this?"
Atlanna felt an inexplicable chill staring at the chi.
It was the power of that demon.
"Didn't you defeat her?" she asked.
Charlie shook his head. "There are seven more like her."
"Got it."
Atlanna glanced at Arthur. "A mother shouldn't interfere too much with her child's choices. He likes you more. Talk to him."
Her smile widened as she addressed Arthur. "Right, dear Arthur? You don't want to listen to me."
Arthur opened his mouth to protest, but her stern, threatening gaze silenced him.
"Yes, I'm very rebellious," he said, face flushed, choking out the words.
He meant he wouldn't listen to either parent.
Charlie could see the shadow looming over Arthur.
Without Atlanna's approval, Arthur wouldn't dare help.
So, Charlie tilted his head 45 degrees, staring at the stars with resolve.
"Atlanna, name your terms."
She grinned, delighted.
That woman, Ophelia, was right.
To win Spider-Man's body, coercion was the way.
So many good people.
Her gaze locked on Charlie. "Atlantis needs a little prince."
Charlie gritted his teeth.
Of course it's that kind of demand.
What do these women take the invincible Spider-Man for?
A breeding bug?
The invincible Spider-Man would never agree to such absurd demands!
Before he could refuse, Corrupted Charlie blurted out, "Hmph, you win. I agree, but I'm not paying child support."
Charlie: "…"
"You jerk, trying to take the hit for me?" he cursed inwardly.
Corrupted Charlie chuckled. "Relax, I wouldn't do anything that twisted. You handle this. I'm out."
A wisp of demonic chi shot from Charlie's head, vanishing into the night.
Charlie: "!!!"
He absorbed the Water Demon's power and can leave my body now?
This was good—and bad.
Who knew what chaos that guy would stir up?
Charlie knew his own unreliability all too well.
"Father, your head was smoking!" Arthur exclaimed.
Charlie rolled his eyes. "That wasn't smoke. It was the merit I earned saving Wakanda."
"What's merit?"
"Can't explain. Don't ask."
"Oh."
Under Atlanna's motherly aura, Arthur obediently dove into the sea to seek new friends and track the demons for his father.
As for Charlie…
Under T'Challa's envious gaze, he followed Atlanna away, utterly defeated.
Sorry, the invincible Spider-Man betrayed love again.
Sob sob sob…
"Come on! Ravish me to your heart's content!"
In the room, Charlie, freshly showered, lay on the bed, arms spread, eyes closed.
"Don't hold back just because I'm a delicate flower!"
Atlanna: "…"
This isn't how I pictured it.
Movies don't go like this!
As she pondered how to proceed, a shadow flashed outside the window, and Charlie vanished.
"Hm?"
In the silent room, a breeze ruffled Atlanna's hair, making her frown.
Charlie wouldn't run, so there was only one possibility.
Someone stole him!
"Damn thief, who are you?!"
She stormed out, face dark.
Meanwhile, invisible Charlie glanced at the masked figure beside him.
"You're… Future Jade?"
The figure pulled off her mask, grabbing Charlie's hand with a grin. "You remember me! That's awesome."
She let go, and Charlie became visible again.
He nodded thoughtfully. "The Snake Talisman's invisibility."
"Yup."
Future Jade tossed the Snake Talisman playfully. "I saved you this time. How're you gonna thank me?" She raised an eyebrow with a wicked smile.
Charlie's expression turned odd. "No way. Out of the tiger's den into the wolf's lair? I'm your dear Spider-Man uncle!"
"What are you even talking about?"
Future Jade facepalmed, exasperated. "You remember me, but I kinda wish you didn't."
She got serious. "I've been hunting the Twelve Talismans too and found most of them."
She pulled out several talismans. "Ox, Horse, Sheep, Chicken, Pig. With yours, we're only missing Dog and Rabbit."
Charlie was stunned. "You found that many so fast?"
Future Jade nodded. "Don't ask how. It's a secret."
"I wasn't gonna."
Future Jade: "…"
Okay, I overthought it.
All her planned excuses were for nothing.
In the past, ten-year-old Jade followed Charlie to find the Twelve Talismans. Future Jade knew exactly how they were found.
So, she beat him to it, saving him tons of time.
But the Rabbit and Dog Talismans were tougher, so she showed up early.
Charlie guessed as much and didn't pry.
Instead, he asked, "Know where the Eight Demons are?"
Future Jade thought, then shook her head. "Nope."
"Alright, where's the Rabbit Talisman?"
Charlie knew Xu Wenwu had the Dog Talisman.
Future Jade tapped her wrist device, pulling up a man's profile.
"It's with him. He's already fast, and with the Rabbit Talisman, I can't catch him."
Charlie blinked at the image.
"I know this guy. Wanda's brother, Pietro. With the Rabbit Talisman, he's a pain, but don't worry. You know Spider-Man's charm. He'll hand it over." He patted his chest confidently.
Future Jade shook her head. "Hope so."
She wasn't optimistic.
In her memory, the Rabbit Talisman wasn't supposed to be with Pietro.
Her early hunt for the talismans had thrown things off, and she wasn't sure what would happen next.
It didn't feel like it'd go smoothly.
Charlie had the same gut feeling.
So he suggested, "Find the Dog Talisman first, then—"
Mid-sentence, Atlanna burst in.
"I knew you were here! Thief who stole Spider-Man, you're dead!!"
She summoned her trident, golden lightning crackling in the room.
Future Jade's face changed. She activated the Pig Talisman without hesitation.
Zzt zzt~
Red beams shot from her eyes, meeting the golden lightning.
Boom!!
Boom
The room was obliterated. Charlie bolted from the scene.
T'Challa, hearing the commotion, rushed over with soldiers.
"Mr. Spider-Man, what happened?"
"No big deal. Two women duking it out over Spider-Man. Happens all the time."
"Mr. Spider-Man, you're quite the charmer."
"Eh, just average."
"Mr. Spider-Man, I have a sister. Maybe—"
"Hold it. I'm just a humble bug, not worthy of a Wakandan princess. Don't set me up."
"Oh, that's a shame. I have no kids, so all Wakanda's wealth will go to my sister…"
"Stop talking. I'm not worthy!"
Charlie pivoted. "But I've got a friend."
He whispered to T'Challa, whose eyes lit up.
"A Spider-Man who turns into a giant lizard and is a hopeless romantic? Perfect for my sister!"
"Yup. I'll introduce them sometime."
"Thank you, Mr. Spider-Man."
"No problem. We're family."
…
In the Gwen Spider-Verse, Lizard Parker, rushing a deadline, sneezed.
"Achoo!"
He rubbed his nose, puzzled.
"Why's my back chilly? Not a cold… maybe…"
He checked his bank account on his phone, sighing in relief.
"Good, money's still there."
He patted his chest, then groaned at the pile of rejected drafts on his desk.
"Ugh! Someone tell me how to get rich without working!"
He wailed, clutching his head.
Pain. Too much pain.