Ringling!
We stepped into the shop, it was old and Dusty looking, it had several book cases filled with more books then I can count, infact there were so many books scattered about that there were stacks of them everywhere.
We walked passed the stacks and made our way to a desk, behind the desk was a garage like lap area, there were several machines and chemistry sets from what I could see.
"Sophia? You here?"
Lisa called out.
There was silence for a moment, then suddenly to our right a box began to shake violently besides us. "H-huh?"
Almost every one of us were startled by the shaking, except ryuji who was calm as ever.
"COME ON! OPEN UP YA FOUR SIDED F***ING CRAP HOLE!" A shrill nasally voice came from the box, it sounded like it belonged to a craised bugs bunny almost, or maybe a high pitched Popeye the sailor, or some other cartoon character from the Golden age of American animation who had an exaggerated New York or Boston accent.
wham! Smack! Crash!
Something in the box rammed it back and forth.
Over and over until-
!!!!
The box broke open and a little man, a tiny, little, ugly looking man with a big red nose and a purple suit with a bow tie and red and a green hat with green gloves popped out, he landed perfectly in a split in front of Lisa.
"HIYA SHMUCKS!... Pleasure to meet ya, say, there's a lott'a pretty look'n girls here...
Especially the brown haired Oriental one with the big boobs! I tell ya what, tifa lockhart would be jealous."
The little ugly man stood up and ripped his hat to us, his annoying voice was like nails on a chalkboard. "The name's veddlebere the wacha'macallit."
I stared at the little man for a good ten seconds. "What the heck are you?"
He looked at me and raised an eye and made of hand gestures. "I told ya' what are you slow? And you mentally screwed? I'm a damn wacha'macallit!"
I looked at Lisa.
"Don't look at me. I've never heard of that."
I looked at ryuji too and he shrugged.
"Beats me too."
The little man rubbed the space between his eyes. "Ok ya boneheads, I'm an ancient shape shifting... Thing, that been around sense before the birth of Christ! I'm three thousand years old, and I'm pretty sure I'm the only one of my kind... "
Before I could answer him, suddenly he became pure energy, then it traveled over to me and re-formed into an even tinier version of him on my shoulder.
"See? I can become small, or big , or whatever shape or size I want, and don't you go thinking I have any existential crises like you humans, (especially fictional ones like yourselves.) I'm perfectly fine with being the only one like me, by the way, you got some earwax hear bud' I tell ya what. I'm gonna get rid of it all for ya-"
Suddenly he transformed into a small drill like thing and entered my ear.
"!!!!!"
"Jack!" Lisa cried out.
I felt him go throughout my entire eardrum, he also muttered all kinds of weird things like- "wow for a webnovel protagonist you sure have a lot of bad hygiene when it comes to your ear, my God it's freaking
Maggot guys in here! I tell ya what,"
Then he popped out the other side and landed in his tiny ugly man form on the floor.
My head was spinning.
"Your welcome kid."
I grabbed my head and took a minute to regain my stability, I was really dizzy after that, he then walked over to Yoko and leaned against her leg. "Say pretty lady, ya ever wanted to date a guy like me? I can be anything you want-" he began to shift into different forms. "Talk, short, handsome, have blonde hair, black hair, da' whole nine yards, whadaya say doll?"
He became his little ugly man form again.
Yoko let out a nervous laugh.
"Ara~ I'm flattered but my heart belongs to someone else."
The little man let out a sigh.
"Oh come on, I swear it's like every girl hates my guts, I haven't had a girlfriend sense the black plague! For crying out loud! F**** (j_stanley stop censoring my words!)"
*No. This is technically a Christian novel. So the f-word will not be shown in my book, you should feel lucky I'm letting this slide at all with the censorship.*
"Oh screw you! You freaking f@#!? I'll !&$# you and make you ?!#$#!"
The little man stood there breathing heavily in anger. I couldn't help it anymore, I sed what was on my mind. I looked at him and sed. "Dude... you sound like Gilbert Godfrey.... "
Suddenly his head turned towards me so fast I heard a crack. "Gilbert Godfrey?... GILBERT GODFREY!? GILBERT GODFREY SOUNDS LIKE ME!"
Filled with rage he Began walking back and forth. "I met the Shmuck' back in 1980! He copied my voice and gave my none of the damn credit! He made millions off it and I've been making scraps all these years! The shmo' went and died before I could sue! WHERE'S MY CUT GIL'?!?!?"
he screamed.
Then out of the back a girl with brown hair in a ponytail tail and glasses walked out, she was wearing a white tank top and orange sweat pants, she had a brown hoodie tied around her waist and she had on brown work boots.
She walked into the room and crossed her arms and leaned against the counter with a look of exasperation. "Veddlevire, can you stop shouting for ten seconds, Lisa has some important business... So if you'd kindly stop acting like a fool and go and get everything ready for us I'd really appreciate it."
Lisa looked over and saw the girl and smiled.
"Sophia!"
She walked over and gave her a hug,
Sophia smiled and tilted her head.
"Nice to see you Lisa."
"Nice to see you too Sophia.,, this is my boyfriend I was telling you about, Jack Turner."
I walked over and shook her hand. Wow she has a really tight grip, I tried not to show it but damn she was breaking my hand, and it looked like she wasn't even trying!
"Nice to meet you jack, better take care of my friend here."
"O-oh, I will. Hehe... Um-"
I let go.
Sophia looked at the little ugly man and sighed. "That little guy's been working for me the past month, he started stalking me the month before because i-"
"Because you got a nice a-"
Before he could finish that sentence a stack of books feel on him out of nowhere, then a few seconds later he came out of the stack squash like a pancake. Literally.
"Ehh???"
"The guy is like a living cartoon character, don't think about it, the laws of physics don't apply him for some reason... Anyway, I figured he could make himself useful so I gave him a job."
The little ugly pancake popped back into a little ugly man and smiled. "Dat's right! And I needed the cash anyway sense annoying humans wasn't paying too well... "
"Anyway-" the brown haired girl pulled up her pants. "Let's go get you your gauntlet ok Jack?"
And so me she took me in the back and got me ready, and after about an hour I had my gauntlet.
From there we made our way to the mines...