After the complete destruction of the ancient underground city in Egypt, Alex and Dean returned to the Bunker, bringing with them a huge golden staff as a souvenir. In reality, they simply had no choice but to take this large golden staff, because the trio of archaeologists who had stolen the big staff began to protest that it was their loot.
Covered in dirt from walking through the underground city and with sand in their pockets, Alex, Dean, and the trio of greedy archaeologists returned to the Bunker. Upon returning, instead of going to wash off the dirt and sand, Alex and Dean decided to celebrate their fun adventure.
Sitting down at the table, Alex and Dean started drinking whiskey while GIR, MIMI, and Stitch tried to squeeze the huge golden staff into the library. The golden staff was large enough that it didn't fully fit inside the library room, and part of it still stuck out from the passage, extending into the main hall. Taking a bottle of good whiskey from his inventory, Alex sat down on a chair and placed a glass in front of Dean.
"Well, let's drink to our first joint adventure," Dean said with a laugh, raising his glass of whiskey.
"And to our first destroyed ancient city. Chin-chin," Alex replied with a smirk, clinking his glass against Dean's.
After clinking glasses, Alex and Dean laughed, because this really was their first joint adventure, and the adventure had been genuinely exciting for them, even if it was short. After drinking the whiskey, Alex and Dean turned their heads and looked at GIR, MIMI, and Stitch, who kept arguing as they tried to fit the huge golden staff into the library.
Watching this trio, Alex and Dean continued drinking, not even bothering to change clothes and remaining seated in their shorts and Hawaiian shirts. Pouring another round of whiskey into the glasses, Alex took out his pocket watch and checked the time. The watch showed six o'clock in the morning. Seeing the time, Alex brought the glass of whiskey to his lips and told Dean that they had spent almost three hours in Egypt.
Dean looked away from the trio of archaeologists and turned to Alex. Alex showed Dean the pocket watch so he could see the time himself. After looking at the time, Dean just shrugged and continued drinking whiskey. An hour later, Alex and Dean simply fell asleep at the table after drinking half the bottle of whiskey. GIR, MIMI, and Stitch fell asleep lying on the golden staff, tired of dragging it around in different directions while trying to fit such a massive thing into the library.
While Alex and Dean slept with their heads on the table, still holding empty whiskey glasses, the first to appear in the library was Doll. After waking up, Doll noticed that Alex wasn't in bed. And after learning from the other girls that Alex sometimes forgot about sleep while working, she decided to find him. Entering the library, Doll saw a rather strange sight: Alex and Dean, covered in dust and sand, were sleeping at the table.
Shifting her gaze to the side, Doll saw a large golden staff with GIR, MIMI, and Stitch sleeping on it. Blinking, Doll looked back at Alex. Walking around the table, Doll sat down on a chair next to Alex and placed her palm on his cheek. Gently running her fingers along Alex's cheek, Doll began stroking his hair, trying not to wake him.
While Doll was stroking Alex's hair, a little sand that he hadn't shaken out fell from his head. Seeing the sand, Doll wondered where Alex and Dean had gone to return in such a state. Carefully wiping Alex's face with a handkerchief, Doll decided not to disturb his sleep and stood up from the chair. Leaning down, Doll gently kissed Alex on the cheek and left the library.
After Doll left, Alex still didn't wake up and continued sleeping. Time continued to pass, and the rest of the girls slowly woke up. Following their usual habit, the girls went to the kitchen, thinking that Alex was already there and had prepared breakfast. But when they entered the kitchen, they saw only Sam, who was trying to wake up while slowly sipping hot coffee, and Doll, who was cooking breakfast for everyone this time.
Not seeing Alex or Dean, Lucina sighed wearily, realizing where Alex and Dean were right now. Lucina immediately headed to the library to confirm her suspicions. She was sure that her husband had either simply fallen asleep in the library (which, in her opinion, was unlikely) or that Alex and Dean had gone on some unclear adventure, found themselves even more problems, and still hadn't returned.
Alice and Samantha followed Lucina to check the same thing. Wednesday calmly watched the girls leave and preferred to drink her coffee first before dealing with anything else. Only Enid didn't understand what was happening and was still trying to wake up.
"Is someone missing?" Enid said sleepily, covering her mouth with her hand to yawn.
"They're sleeping in the library," Doll said, placing breakfast on the table.
Enid just nodded as if everything was normal and was ready to start eating her breakfast. But a moment later it dawned on her what was going on. Sam just shrugged and decided to finish his coffee. But he began to have doubts after even Enid followed the other girls. Taking his coffee, Sam followed Enid into the library.
Passing through the main hall, Sam froze in the library entrance, standing behind the girls. Before his eyes was a rather strange sight: Alex and Dean were sleeping at the table, holding empty glasses, with a half-empty bottle of whiskey between them. Sam's gaze slid to the side, and he saw the huge golden staff that had been somehow squeezed into the library, with GIR, MIMI, and Stitch sleeping on it.
"Can someone explain what's going on here?" Sam asked, pinching the bridge of his nose and looking down at the girls.
Sam was sure that when he went to sleep at midnight, everything was normal: Alex and Dean continued reading documents, saying they would go to sleep in a couple of hours too. But now it looked like they hadn't gone to sleep at all, but had gone on some shady adventure instead. No one immediately answered Sam's question, because the girls themselves were trying to figure out what Alex and Dean had done.
And the sight of the huge golden staff didn't help them understand the situation at all. The first thought that came to Lucina's mind when she saw this was that her husband had simply gotten bored and decided to go on an adventure. Alice, Samantha, and Enid thought exactly the same, as they had heard more than once about Alex's escapades.
"Judging by how they look and what they're wearing, they most likely robbed some tomb," Lucina said, massaging her temples from the incoming headache.
"The only question is, in what tomb could you find such a huge piece of gold… And why did they even drag it here," Samantha said, poking her finger at the huge golden staff.
"I have no idea. I'm more interested in why they did it… And more importantly, where the hell did they go," Lucina said in an irritated tone.
The answer to this question interested not only Lucina, but also Alice, Samantha, Enid, and especially Sam. Enid and Alice began examining the huge golden staff, trying to figure out from where it had been stolen. Lucina was still suffering from a headache, once again thinking that she shouldn't have gotten distracted and should have dragged Alex to bed as soon as she herself was about to go to sleep.
After all, it hadn't even crossed her mind that Alex and Dean would suddenly decide to go rob some tomb on the other side of the world. Meanwhile, Samantha opened the bag lying on the table, trying to find any clues. But all she found was explosives, weapons, ammunition, flares, and a flare gun. Sam, in turn, was examining the documents that Alex and Dean had been reviewing yesterday to understand where these two had gone.
"Can you please be quiet…" Alex's sleepy voice sounded among the girls' voices.
"Seriously… What's all this noise so early in the morning," Dean's sleepy voice followed right after.
Alex and Dean woke up from the noise and simultaneously rubbed their faces to wake up. Stopping rubbing their faces, Alex and Dean looked around, trying to understand what was happening. Alex met Lucina's gaze, and she pointed her finger at the huge golden staff with a silent question about what this thing was doing here.
In response to his wife's gesture, Alex simply yawned, causing Lucina's eyelid to twitch. Dean was rubbing his temples from the headache after the whiskey and a couple of hours of sleep. Massaging his temples, Dean yawned sleepily and looked over everyone present.
"Can one of you two idiots explain what the hell you did?" Sam asked, placing his coffee on the table.
"Nothing out of the ordinary… We found a clue about another artifact and went to check it out. That's all," Dean said carelessly, stretching slightly to loosen his stiff shoulders from sleeping at the table.
"Don't tell me this giant thing is the magical artifact?" Enid asked, sitting on the huge golden staff.
"Nah, that's just a souvenir we brought with us…" Dean waved it off, making it clear that the big piece of gold was just gold.
"The question was about something else — what exactly did you two idiots do," Lucina repeated the question, squeezing Alex's face, hinting that he wouldn't get away with it.
"Nothing out of the ordinary… We found an ancient pyramid that's more than five thousand years old. Took a couple of things from there and left," Alex replied in a carefree tone while Lucina was squeezing his face.
"Impossible. The first pyramids were built around 2600 BC," Sam said, looking at Alex and Dean in surprise.
Sam didn't have time to ask more questions or get answers before Lucina raised her hand, signaling him to be quiet. Seeing Lucina's calm gaze, Sam decided to stay silent, slightly intimidated by her look. After stopping Sam, Lucina turned her gaze back to her husband, making it clear that she didn't believe a single word he said.
Lucina knew perfectly well that with her husband, the words "just took it and left" never meant exactly that. Alex met Lucina's calm gaze and slowly shifted his eyes to Alice, who was looking at him with a cheerful smile, resting her cheeks on her hands while sitting on the huge golden staff.
Alex's gaze slid to Enid, but she also had a cheerful smile on her face, as if waiting for the continuation. Samantha, meeting Alex's gaze, waved her hand, making it clear that he should tell everything. Even Dean in this situation looked like a teenager who had been caught causing trouble and now faced an unpleasant conversation with the adults.
"If you're done looking for help, spill it. What did you and Dean do? And how much trouble did it cause?" Lucina said, turning Alex's face back toward her and forcing him to look her in the eyes.
"Well, maybe we didn't just take the artifact and leave. Things were a bit different there," Alex said after clearing his throat, glancing at Dean.
"Stop pretending to be embarrassed. Do you think I don't know how much trouble you've caused in the past? Now spill it. What did you do?" Lucina said, rolling her eyes and grabbing Alex by the nose.
"We found an ancient underground city that had a temple…" Alex began, trying to ignore the fact that his nose was still being squeezed.
"And what happened next? Was the temple cursed?" Enid asked with a cheerful smile, lightly swinging her legs.
"Pretty much. The mummy in the sarcophagus was cursed. And we might have awakened an entire army of mummies and stone statues," Dean continued instead of Alex, telling what had happened to them.
"You opened a cursed sarcophagus, awakened a mummy, stole an artifact from it. And what happened after that?" Sam said, nodding as if he already understood where this was going.
"Well, knowing all those mummy movies and everything, we basically blew up the ancient city, collapsing the ceiling, and the pyramid along with it. And the staff that Alice and Enid are sitting on was used as a battering ram against the army of mummies," Alex said, shrugging, while Dean nodded, confirming Alex's words.
Enid and Alice immediately froze upon hearing Alex's words. Both girls turned their gazes to Alex and Dean, who was nodding, confirming that the huge golden staff had been used as a battering ram against mummies. Realizing they had been sitting on something that had essentially been used as a weapon against mummies, expressions of horror and disgust appeared on Alice's and Enid's faces.
Both girls instantly jumped off the golden staff, starting to complain that no one had told them about this. Enid and Alice began shaking Alex, repeating that he should have said something earlier before they sat on the golden staff. Feeling himself being rocked back and forth, Alex continued telling everything that had happened to him and Dean in Egypt.
During the story, Wednesday and Doll arrived, with Doll carrying Alessa in her arms. Lucina nodded while listening to Alex's story, not at all surprised by how it had ended. Dean, for his part, didn't forget to brag to Sam about what an amazing view of the underground city there had been and that such a sight could only be seen once in a lifetime. Sam gave his brother a blank look and became interested in the artifact that Dean and Alex had stolen from the mummy.
"So what kind of artifact did you find?" Sam asked after Alex and Dean had started telling about their adventure in Egypt.
"Well, we brought back a khopesh that belonged to a god," Alex said, taking the golden khopesh out of his inventory.
"Which god? There were many gods in Egyptian mythology," Samantha asked with interest, examining the khopesh lying on the table.
"This is the khopesh of Uwubis himself, the god of the underworld and judge of souls," Alex said in a mockingly sweet tone, placing his hands on his cheeks.
When Alex's words came out in such a disgusting tone, expressions of strong disgust appeared on Lucina's and Wednesday's faces. Alice and Enid couldn't hold back and took several photos, laughing loudly. After all, only Alex could say something like that about some god.
Alessa, being a little adult, covered her eyes with her hand, not wanting to see her father make such a face. Dean turned away, grabbing the table with one hand while covering his mouth with the other, coughing hard from a fit of laughter. Samantha at that moment pretended she hadn't heard anything and turned away. But her trembling shoulders showed she was holding back with all her strength not to burst into loud laughter.
Only Sam looked at the golden khopesh and pulled it closer to examine it better. When everyone finished laughing at Alex, Sam wanted to know what power this golden khopesh possessed. Hearing Sam's question, the girls looked at Alex, waiting for his explanation.
Alex explained what powers the golden khopesh possessed, and anticipating the follow-up question about Anubis, he explained where the judge of souls was now. After listening to Alex's explanation, Sam nodded, understanding that this khopesh could be used against Amara if needed. Or as material for a cage in case their plan to defeat Amara didn't go as planned.
"Now that you've finished sharing the story of your adventure, go take a shower. Sand is literally falling off you. And I won't let you into bed if even one grain of sand falls off you," Lucina said, pushing Alex off the chair.
"I agree. Nobody likes sand in bed. So go take a shower, quickly," Alice said, nodding and pushing Alex in the back.
"Want to join me?" Alex asked while Alice was pushing him in the back.
"Since you're asking so nicely, fine, I'll keep you company," Alice said with a wide smile, jumping onto Alex's back.
Alex smirked and went to take a shower with Alice. Dean looked at his Hawaiian shirt, which wasn't the cleanest, and at his hands. Dean ran his hand through his hair a little, and a handful of sand fell onto the table. Seeing this, Dean decided that he really needed to take a shower.
Telling them where he was going, Dean waved his hand and, with his hands in the pockets of his shorts, lazily headed to his room. After Alex and Alice went to take a shower, the girls went to eat their breakfast, which they had missed because of Alex himself.
As for GIR, MIMI, and Stitch, they had been sleeping on the huge golden staff the whole time and didn't care about the surrounding noise. After all, they now had a big piece of gold that they could use as a bed, and if necessary — as a battering ram.
Several days passed after Alex and Dean's return from Egypt. There was a small rearrangement in the library in favor of the large golden staff, which GIR, MIMI, and Stitch wouldn't let anyone touch, shouting that it was their treasure. The giant golden staff was slightly shortened and hung from the ceiling, where GIR, MIMI, and Stitch constantly slept or played their games.
The cut-off part of the golden staff was used as a decorative column against the wall, thanks to the hieroglyphs carved into the gold. Over these two days, the last boxes of documents were checked, but they contained no more useful information — only unverified legends or things that had already been used in the past or were already in the Bunker. Including the famous Colt, which was in the Bunker.
By the morning of the third day, Alex and Dean were sitting in the library. Dean was sitting with a book while Alex stood off to the side talking on the phone. At the same time, Sam entered the library, holding a plate of cereal and using his laptop as a tray.
"Guys, did you stay here all night again?" Sam asked as he entered the library.
"Sleep is harmful, like smoking," Dean said without looking up at Sam.
"What? That's not true. Actually… Sitting is harmful, like smoking," Sam said mockingly, correcting his brother.
"No, I don't think that's right," Dean replied, turning the page of the book.
"Dean, stop reading these books. We've already found everything we could. This week we've been to every corner of the world… Even the British couldn't find more than we did," Sam said, looking at Dean, who continued reading the book.
"Do you really think that with these few barely useful artifacts we can somehow stand against Amara? Sam, she's not just some monster — she's the sister of God himself. Lucifer used a fraction of God's power and couldn't even ruin her manicure. Alex's hands are completely tied against Amara," Dean said irritably, closing the book and looking at his brother.
"What about our plan? If we can't stop Amara the simple way, our other plan…" Sam began, looking at Dean.
"Yeah, I know what our wonderful plan is. Build another cage for Amara. But how are we going to shove her in there, and will we even have enough strength for it? Have you thought about that?" Dean said, standing up from the table and looking at Sam as if he were an idiot.
"We'll figure it out as always. There's not just the two of us. We have Alex, Cas, and the girls. We have more allies than before. We'll manage somehow," Sam said, trying to make Dean understand that they still had a chance.
Dean looked at Sam and sighed heavily. Dean understood that his brother was right — this time they had more allies who could help. But Dean always knew what fate awaited those who tried to help them. And Dean no longer wanted a repeat of that; he was tired of losing those he considered his family. Every time he got attached to someone and considered them family, those people died because of him.
Sam also shared these feelings, as they had both been through it. But Sam believed that this time everything would be different. They just needed to prepare better, and then they would have a chance at victory. Dean looked at Alex, who was still talking on the phone, and rubbed his face with his hands, trying to get rid of the negative thoughts that had surfaced in his head again.
"Yeah, thank you very much, Anderson. If you find out anything, call. And thanks again… Hey, what kind of drama are you guys putting on in the background," Alex said, ending the phone call and turning to Dean and Sam.
"How's the priest doing?" Dean asked, ignoring Alex's words.
"Nothing yet. Anderson and the Iscariot members are currently in Central Europe. But they haven't found anything… And I'll say it again — what kind of drama are you guys putting on here? Are you grown men or two teenagers?" Alex began to explain, staring at Dean and Sam with a blank look.
"There was no drama. Sam suggested taking a break," Dean replied, pointing his finger at Sam, who was sitting on the table.
Alex shifted his gaze to Sam. Sam nodded, confirming that they needed to take a break from the search and do something else. Alex thought for a moment whether they should take a break. Even for him, this week of searching had been very irritating and boring.
Even the trips to different parts of the world hadn't generated enough excitement to outweigh the downsides of such boring searches. Lighting a thin cigar, Alex sat down at the table and looked at Dean. Dean thought for a moment and nodded, showing that they really needed a break. And killing a couple of monsters would be a pretty good way to distract themselves from the search.
"Alright, show me what you've got," Alex said with a smile, looking at Sam.
"That's how you should have started. So, look… Libby Strauss. Disappeared near Gunnison, Colorado," Sam said, opening his laptop and placing it on the table.
Alex leaned forward to read the article Sam had found. Dean stood behind Alex, leaning on the chair and waving his hand slightly to drive away the smoke from the thin cigar. Seeing the headline of the news article, Alex immediately remembered what kind of case this was and what kind of monsters would be involved. After thinking a bit, Alex decided it wouldn't be bad to go to another state to deal with monsters that appear once a generation to reproduce and then fall back into hibernation.
"Libby's friend claimed she was dragged into the forest by some mutant with green eyes," Sam said, sitting on the edge of the table and explaining what was in the article.
"Green eyes? Or maybe a little green man?" Dean asked, looking up at Sam.
"Maybe just some psychopath," Alex suggested, shaking the ash into the ashtray, even though he already knew what was really going on.
"I would have thought that too. But it gets even better. The friend chased after Libby and her kidnapper. And then she found Libby. Except, as she says, it wasn't Libby anymore — it was the same kind of mutant with green eyes," Sam continued explaining what he had read in the article.
"So some kind of forest spirit that jumps from body to body?" Dean said thoughtfully, stroking his chin.
"That's exactly what you two are going to find out," Sam said with a smirk, looking at Alex and Dean.
"Us? What about you?" Alex asked, looking up at Sam.
"I'll clean up here in the meantime, and burn or throw out everything unnecessary… And most importantly — don't cause a mess like you did in Egypt," Sam said with a smirk, getting up from the table.
Alex and Dean looked at each other, then at Sam, and simultaneously rolled their eyes. Maybe when they were together they were a bit reckless, and the incident in Egypt was an accident. Sam just looked back at Alex and Dean, making it clear that they should hurry before more bodies appeared. Shrugging, Alex went to the girls to tell them he was leaving.
After all, he knew that Dean definitely wouldn't want to teleport and would insist on driving the Impala. As soon as Alex said he was going on a hunt, the girls practically kicked him out, saying he should rest from the search since everything was already prepared. Lucina reminded Alex that the town they were going to investigate should remain intact, as should the forest surrounding the town.
"Am I a child? I know what I can and can't do," Alex said, offended, while changing clothes for the trip.
"Yes, you're a child in an adult's body. That's why you need to be reminded of what you shouldn't do," Samantha said, squeezing Alex's face with her hands.
"And don't forget your suit. And be careful with the suit. It's custom-made. And Doll just ironed it. So don't wrinkle it," Alice said, handing Alex a new black suit.
"Anything else?" Alex asked, pursing his lips because they were treating him like a child.
"I think that's everything… Hm… Oh, right. Hugs," Enid said thoughtfully, and then tightly hugged Alex, rubbing her nose against his chest.
Alex froze for a moment, then exhaled through his nose and hugged Enid back. After quickly hugging and kissing the girls goodbye, Alex decided to stop by Alessa's room to tell her he would be gone for a couple of days. Approaching Alessa's room, Alex looked inside and saw Alessa with Thing sitting on her head, reading a book together with GIR, MIMI, and Stitch. Alessa raised her gaze and slightly tilted her head to the side.
Alex smiled gently and said he was leaving for a couple of days. Alessa just nodded and waved her hand slightly, showing that he could go have fun. Hearing his daughter's words, Alex winked at Alessa in farewell and closed the door. Entering the garage, Alex saw Dean loading his things into the trunk.
"Managed to get permission from your parents for a road trip with a friend? Or did your strict parents not let you go because I'm a bad influence on you?" Dean asked in a sarcastic tone, looking up at Alex.
"Fuck off, idiot. Who's a bad influence on whom," Alex said, carefully placing his things in the trunk.
"That's exactly what I'm saying… Alright, hop in the car and let's go. We've got nine hours of exciting driving ahead to Colorado," Dean said with a chuckle, getting into the Impala.
Alex lazily yawned while closing the trunk. Getting into the Impala, Alex leaned back in the seat, and Dean started the engine. At that moment, music started playing from the radio, and Alex closed his eyes. Alex understood that this would be a long drive, so he was going to rest while they headed to Gunnison.
Dean drove out of the Bunker's underground garage and, once on the road, immediately picked up speed. After several hours of continuous driving, Dean began to feel hungry. Turning his head to Alex, Dean nudged him with his shoulder to wake him up. Alex sighed and opened his eyes, taking the earphones out of his ears.
"What?" Alex asked, sleepily rubbing his eyes.
"I'm going to stop to grab a bite and refuel," Dean said, pointing at the gas station and diner ahead.
"Hmm… Yeah, we can. I somehow forgot that we didn't even have breakfast… If coffee and whiskey can even count as breakfast," Alex said with a yawn, rubbing his eyes a little.
Dean nodded and turned into the gas station. While Dean was refueling the car, Alex went into the diner to order food. Taking a table, Alex took out his phone and decided to read the article again that was the reason they were driving to another state. After refueling the Impala, Dean entered the diner and sat down across from Alex.
A couple of minutes later, food was brought to Alex and Dean, and they began eating not the healthiest food — burgers and french fries. While eating his burger, Alex continued reading the news to pass the time.
"What do you think about the situation in Gunnison?" Dean asked, washing down his burger with coffee.
"Not clear yet. But I'm sure it's not a demon with green eyes. Most likely some kind of forest spirit or a curse," Alex replied, wiping his hands with a napkin.
"I thought the same. But we'll find out all the details when we get to Gunnison. As soon as we finish eating, we'll keep driving," Dean agreed, finishing his burger in a couple of bites.
Alex smiled slightly while finishing his coffee, which tasted like the usual coffee served in such diners. After finishing their not-very-healthy breakfast, Alex and Dean returned to the Impala and continued their journey, this time with full stomachs.
To be continued...
(As I've said many times, I just don't like to skip things. So, from here on out, we have another case between Alex and Dean, and then we move on to the final chapter. I'm still wondering how this arc will end. But what I'm certain of is that someone will show up who will get Alex into a lot of trouble. Although, you already know who will show up. I think I wanted to say something else, but as always, I forgot. Oh well. I'll go get something to eat. Peace, love, and if you have a raccoon, you've won this life.)
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