The girls from Alex's family were peacefully enjoying the serene atmosphere on a hill right in front of Erebor — the kingdom of the dwarves. Except for Erina, Alice, and Hisako, who had recently joined this rather unusual group, the rest were well aware of how Alex's "battles" usually ended.
When he went off with Bella and Lili to fight Smaug, the girls didn't worry. Instead, they started discussing the possible aftermath. After all, every skirmish involving Alex typically turned into a localized catastrophe. Like in Orario, when he fought Erebus after the latter turned into a dragon, and managed to destroy every dungeon floor below the eighteenth.
The girls from Night City — Lucina, Kiwi, Becca, and Gloria — reminded everyone of his first job as a mercenary, which ended with an entire floor of Arasaka Tower blown up after Alex planted a paint-filled bomb there. And that wasn't the only "contract" where Alex, supposedly just trying to earn some money, left nothing but fire and chaos behind.
Those who had followed Alex in the zombie apocalypse world — which later escalated into a full-scale demonic invasion — also recalled their "favorite" moments. Saya brought up the time Alex tried to lure zombies into a depot, but triggered a chain explosion instead. Mari and Shino talked about the time he hurled an entire tank at a mutant zombie while defending a Tokyo shelter. And Miu and Renka remembered how the fight with Diego ended in an exorcism using holy acid, which Alex poured right onto the enemy's face.
Claire and Recca, in turn, remembered a city on the border of South Korea that was literally wiped off the map thanks to Alex's efforts. And then there was the island where Albert Wesker had hidden — it didn't last long either. And that's not even mentioning the time Alex fended off a horde of undead… using a gold brick.
The more they recalled, the more amusing it all became. The girls even started debating who had the best memory from Alex's "destructive adventures."
Meanwhile, Erina, Hisako, and Alice sat in stunned silence, completely shocked by everything they were hearing.
"And now the valkyries are going to chime in…" muttered Sherry, noticing Brunhilde and her sisters from Valhalla joining the conversation.
Soon, after a lively round of discussion, they all sighed in unison. They could only hope the dwarven kingdom wouldn't be reduced to a pile of rubble… at least not immediately. Each of them secretly wanted to see the grandeur of Erebor before Alex accidentally erased it from the map of Middle-earth.
As they kept chatting, the girls noticed something odd — a delay. Enough time had passed, but there were still no sounds of battle. Someone even suggested that Alex, Bella, and Lili had simply gotten lost in Erebor's hallways.
"Don't tell me they actually got lost," sighed Rika, resting her cheek on her fist.
"Unlikely. It's Alex," Valmet shook her head. "Remember how he found the way into the underground lab? Just punched through the floor and jumped straight to the bottom level."
Many of the girls from the "Evil Corporation Expedition" in Hong Kong nodded. Yeah, that was very much his style.
But before a new round of arguments could start, the ground beneath their feet trembled. All eyes turned toward Erebor. Even Thorin and his companions grew alert. The battle had begun.
Brunhilde closed her eyes, reestablishing her spiritual connection with Alex to understand what was going on. After a few seconds, she sighed heavily and rubbed her temples.
"What now?" Hlökk snapped, arms crossed. "What's that idiot up to this time?"
"He's… throwing massive gemstones at Smaug," Brunhilde reported with a weary shake of her head.
"Well… that sounds like Alex," Kiwi snorted, pulling out a cigarette. "Shall we remind everyone how he stormed the Scavengers' hideout with a single iron rod?"
"At least he didn't bring a bag full of gold coins," Ryuu added with a touch of irony. "Though, knowing him, that might be the next phase of the plan."
"Or he might try to feed the dragon gold until it explodes," Renka said cheerfully, and the girls burst into laughter.
The girls began sharing their ideas on how Alex could defeat the dragon. The dwarves, along with one curious hobbit, listened with interest, unable to grasp what kind of madman was capable of such feats. Although some of the dwarves admitted that the idea of feeding the dragon gold until it died sounded pretty cool in its own way.
Meanwhile, the darkness of greed still raged in Thorin's heart. His mind had split into two voices: one — noble and strong — repeated Alex's words, that a true king always keeps his word; the other — like a demon — whispered promises of returning gold and power. Fortunately, the voice of the king was louder for now, allowing Thorin to restrain his greed, though with great difficulty.
At the same time, a growing tremor was felt beneath their feet. The only ones who could say anything about what was happening inside Erebor were the valkyries. So the girls practically forced Brunhilde to reestablish the spiritual connection with Alex so she could relay events in real-time.
The dwarves, noticing this "transmission," began to wonder how the girls even knew what was happening inside the fortress when they were still standing right here.
"Excuse me for interrupting…" Balin began politely. "But may I ask how you know what's going on inside?"
"It's quite simple, young dwarf," Brunhilde replied, looking at him. "Between us — the eleven sisters — and Alex, there exists a spiritual link. We can hear his thoughts and see what he sees. That's how we know everything happening inside your kingdom."
"Pardon me, but… why did you call Balin young? He's not young at all," Bilbo blurted out in surprise.
"Because my sister is dozens of times older than that dwarf," Alvitr replied with a smug smile, raising her nose haughtily.
Brunhilde's eye twitched at those words. A second later, her palm smacked the back of Alvitr's head with a crisp slap.
Age — a sensitive topic. Especially among the girls from Alex's family. Even Freya, Hephaestus, Hestia, Loki, and Nyx — the oldest and most powerful — would get annoyed when someone mentioned their age. So no one felt the need to pity Alvitr. She bit her lip in offended silence, ready to protest, but a single cold glare from Brunhilde sent a chill down her spine.
Those who had been about to ask questions about age immediately changed their minds. Silence became their salvation.
To quickly change the subject and steer the conversation back on track, Sherry hastily intervened, reminding everyone how this all started in the first place.
Brunhilde threw another warning glance at Alvitr, then reconnected with Alex. And… froze. The girls immediately noticed the shift in her expression.
"What's wrong?" Ryuu asked, noticing Brunhilde tense up.
Trying to maintain composure, she finally forced out:
"He's… in Smaug's mouth."
A moment passed — and total silence fell. Even the wind stopped. Only the deep rumblings from the ongoing battle inside reminded everyone that the world hadn't stopped.
And then came loud, uncontrollable laughter. The girls laughed until they cried. Even the dwarves and Bilbo, though shocked by what they'd heard, couldn't help but smirk.
As it turned out, Alex really was stuck in Smaug's mouth, clenched between the dragon's teeth. And at that moment, he was furiously swearing, beating the dragon across the snout with a golden brick, each blow accompanied by such colorful language that even Becca would've seemed like an innocent nun in comparison.
Meanwhile, inside Erebor, in the very treasury of Durin's line, true chaos was unfolding.
Alex was caught in Smaug's jaws. On the dragon's back — Lily, who was relentlessly smashing its scales with furious blows. Bella, clinging to its tail, had stabbed it with a knife to avoid falling.
Alex mentally cursed the moment he reinforced Erebor with mana: now the walls, columns, and ceilings were nearly indestructible. What was even more infuriating — Smaug, realizing this, started using Alex as a battering ram, slamming him into those very walls.
"Where the hell is this lizard getting all this strength?!" Alex raged internally, still hammering Smaug's face with the same brick. But the dragon had no intention of letting go. Another slam, another wall — and now Smaug was beginning to ascend, still holding Alex in his jaws.
Without stopping his cursing for even a second, Alex never once repeated himself — demonstrating a true talent for crafting new and increasingly expressive insults.
Noticing the approaching wall, Alex weakened it with a magical effort, allowing Smaug to break through. But the dragon continued to rise, still using Alex as a living battering ram.
"This is karma..." Alex thought between impacts. "I've used enemies as battering rams plenty of times myself..."
And he kept furiously smashing a brick into the dragon's snout, refusing to give up.
Another wall of the throne hall was smashed by Alex's body. Lily and Bella, barely holding on to Smaug, nearly fell off — each shattered wall was a fresh ordeal. The blows were getting stronger, and only by some miracle were the girls still clinging to the dragon's back and tail.
Finally, Smaug crashed through the last wall and burst into the throne room. But even that didn't stop Alex: he kept hammering Smaug in the face with a golden brick, still shouting curses and insults with every hit.
That finally enraged the dragon. Fire began to gather in his throat. Clamping his jaws on Alex, Smaug exhaled flames, hoping to finally burn the annoying little human to ashes. Alex saw it all, but to his surprise, he wasn't afraid — in fact, he felt a strange, almost mad joy. The fire burst forth, flooding the throne room and covering the stone walls with heat.
Smaug thought for a moment that he had finally rid himself of the pest… but soon felt another strike to the face — with that same golden brick. The brick didn't melt. And neither did Alex.
"You seriously thought your flame would burn me?" Alex shouted. "Fuck you, you damn lizard! Still not enough? Fine, have some more! You love gold? I'll feed it to you till you explode from greed!"
He kept bashing the dragon's snout with the brick, each strike punctuated by more colorful swearing.
Meanwhile, Lily and Bella were now both clinging to the dragon's tail, hoping this nightmare would end soon... But Alex had managed to piss Smaug off even more, and the dragon, teeth clenched, lunged forward, smashing through the massive gates of Erebor. He flew outside, soaring into the sky, still holding Alex in his mouth.
In some twisted way, Alex was lucky — at least the dragon had his teeth on him. Lily and Bella, on the other hand, dangled from the tail, exhausted and on the verge of falling. Back in the valley, Alex's girls and Thorin's group saw Smaug shoot out of the mountain.
Anya, Nyaruko, Jinx, GIR, MIMI, and Stitch immediately rushed forward. From the other side came Valeria, Nobukatsu, Alice, and Göll, carrying some artifacts they'd found. Seeing Smaug, the girls instantly drew their weapons, just in case he decided to attack.
Then everyone heard… shouting and the most obscene swearing coming from above. The girls quickly covered the children's ears to shield them from the barrage.
Someone grabbed binoculars, someone else aimed their sniper scope. What they saw triggered another wave of laughter.
Smaug flew directly over them. Everything moved in slow motion: in the dragon's mouth — Alex, still bashing its snout with a golden brick and swearing like a sailor. Behind him — Lily and Bella, hanging onto the tail for dear life.
"HELP!" Lily screamed.
"MAKE IT STOP!" Bella echoed.
"FUCK YOU, SMAUG!" came Alex's voice from above.
Smaug roared overhead. The strong gusts from his wings tousled the girls' hair. Everyone turned to look where the dragon disappeared.
"Well, at least he's having fun," Gloria snorted, fixing her messy hair. "If he were bored, he'd have already killed that dragon."
"Exactly," Shizuka agreed, pouting. "But damn it, that wind totally ruined my hair!"
"Hey, maybe we should help Lily and Bella — they're basically on a rollercoaster from hell right now," Lucina said, shaking her head.
The girls exchanged glances, realized Lucina was right, and immediately sprang into action. Calling over GIR, MIMI, and Stitch, they coordinated and rushed after Smaug to intercept Lily and Bella before they could fall all the way down.
Thorin's group was still in mild shock from what they had seen and heard. But what struck them most was how much of a game it seemed to be for Alex.
Chun-Li, Cammy, Juri, Shigure, Renka, and Miu also took off running after Smaug.
Meanwhile, panic broke out in Lake-town. The residents, terrified at the approaching dragon, began to flee their homes en masse, fearing Smaug would burn the city to ashes.
Alex noticed the girls rushing after and immediately understood why they were chasing him. At that moment, Lily and Bella slipped and began to fall. Alex reacted instantly: he waved his hand, creating a powerful gust of wind that caught the girls and threw them toward their pursuers.
Lily's and Bella's shouts echoed through the valley — mostly curses aimed at Alex, blaming him for everything that happened.
Chun-Li, Cammy, Juri, Shigure, Renka, and Miu, seeing their friends falling, quickly lowered GIR, MIMI, and Stitch to the ground and began stretching a tarp to try to catch them. Thanks to Alex's timely reaction and help, Lily and Bella really did fall right onto the taut fabric.
Realizing they were saved, the girls stared up at the blue sky with expressions that looked like promises of revenge.
"How are you guys holding up?" Miu asked cautiously.
"Try riding a dragon while holding onto its tail and you'll understand how we felt," Lily replied irritably, jumping off the tarp.
"I think it was fun!" Juri said with a wide smile. "My heart was pounding with adrenaline!"
"Then ask Alex to find you another dragon," Lily snorted, rolling her eyes. "We'll tie you to its tail and you'll fly for the thrill!"
Meanwhile, Bella was clearly not in a joking mood — she was still nauseous from the ordeal. Miu helped her regain composure, and the girls slowly made their way back to the hill where the others waited.
Alex, after making sure Lily and Bella were okay, momentarily got distracted. And that cost him control over the situation: Smaug turned around and started flying rapidly toward Lake-town.
Knowing that a tragedy like the original timeline could repeat, Alex didn't hesitate. He forced the dragon's jaws open from the inside and climbed onto its snout.
"Hey, where do you think you're going?" he shouted, standing right between Smaug's eyes. "Planning to fly to the city? Burn it down? Bad, Smaug. Very bad. You're a naughty dragon. And naughty dragons need to be punished. Seismic stomp."
Alex stomped his foot on Smaug's skull. At that very moment, an invisible, overwhelming force crashed down on the dragon's body. Smaug sharply dropped as if struck by an invisible hand from the heavens. With a thunderous crash, he slammed onto the mountain ledges, scattering huge boulders all around.
Smaug felt the weight of his body increase a hundredfold. He was literally pinned to the ground. And Alex, still standing on his snout, looked down at him with contempt.
"Well, you tried, Smaug. But you're a long way from Ancalagon. Like I said — you're just a wyvern, nothing more. Morgoth's dragons… Ha. Pitiful mutts compared to the true sky dragons — Ddraig, Albion… Not to mention the Great Red or Ophis. Next to them, you're just a flying lizard who forgot your place."
Alex crouched down and looked straight into Smaug's eyes.
The dragon's eyes blazed with rage. He couldn't move, couldn't even open his mouth. His entire body seemed paralyzed. All he could do was growl, staring at Alex with hatred. But Alex wasn't fazed at all. He had seen looks like that hundreds of times — from gods and monsters alike. And every time the outcome was the same.
In his hand was still the golden brick, stained with Smaug's blood.
"Since you love gold so much, you'll die from it," Alex said. "How fitting."
He squeezed the brick tighter — and delivered the first blow to Smaug's skull.
Where before Alex had just been playing, inflicting superficial wounds, now he hit seriously — aiming to beat the dragon to death. The first strike made blood spurt out. Then the second, third, fourth… Blood flew in all directions, soaking Alex's clothes, his face, and the stones around them.
With every hit, he wasn't just causing pain — he was taking revenge for all the suffering, for all the fear this dragon had brought to others. Smaug growled but couldn't do anything. He understood: this was the end. And the way he was dying was humiliating. Not in battle, not by a hero's arrow, but beaten to death with a brick like a wild beast.
With the last blow, the skull cracked, and Smaug's brain splattered to the sides. The dragon's eyes slowly closed.
Alex stood up, wiped blood from his forehead with the back of his hand, and looked at the bloody brick.
"Well, my dear friend… we've defeated another enemy," he said, tired but satisfied.
At the same time, the people of Lake-town felt immense relief — they had seen with their own eyes how Smaug had fallen short of reaching their homes. The four dwarves who hadn't gone to Erebor and stayed behind due to Kili's poisoning — Fili, Kili, Bofur, and Oin — also sighed with relief. But in their hearts remained worry for their friends and relatives who stayed in the mountains and were about to face Smaug face to face.
"Why did he leave Erebor so early?" Fili quietly muttered. "And who could have defeated him?.."
Tauriel, the elf whom Kili had feelings for, stood beside Legolas, watching the dragon's fall as well. Throughout Lake-town, whispers sparked: What happened to Smaug? Why did he suddenly fall? And no one knew that even if the dragon hadn't burned the city — someone else might have destroyed him.
Amid the morning mist on the lake, shadows slipped by: boats carrying an orc army were already close to the shore. No one—not even Alex—knew about this turn of events, or that another looming threat was soon to arrive in the form of the orc army, who were advancing not only underground through the mountains but also sailing across the lake.
Meanwhile, Fili, Kili, Bofur, and Oin prepared to set out—they had decided to go to Erebor to find out what had happened. Leaving Bard's house, which had sheltered Thorin's company, Kili paused on the doorstep and saw Tauriel. Their eyes met. They didn't want to part, but circumstances, the pain of the past, and an uncertain future wouldn't let them be together. After looking at each other with sadness, Kili took a step forward—Fili gave his brother a gentle push to keep him moving.
Tauriel watched him go. Legolas, meanwhile, kept his eyes fixed on the sky.
"Those weren't dwarves," he said, frowning.
"What do you mean, Legolas?" Tauriel asked, turning to him.
"The dragon wasn't killed by a dwarf. Someone else. I caught a glimpse of a figure on its head… and then Smaug fell."
"Who could be strong enough to bring down a dragon?" Tauriel asked in amazement.
Legolas just shook his head—he didn't know who could possess such power.
Meanwhile, the one they were talking about was dragging Smaug's dead body behind him. Alex had not forgotten his promise to Erina: to get dragon meat. Even though Smaug wasn't a true dragon to him, in this world he was considered one of the last and greatest.
Alex's family and Thorin's company awaited his return. Thorin, though eager to get back to Erebor for the Arkenstone, listened to his inner voice—the king had to wait for his ally.
Then, in the distance, the sound of approaching footsteps echoed. First came Alex, dragging Smaug's carcass by the tail, with a cigarette smoking in his other hand. Erina's and Alice's eyes lit up—they were already mentally preparing a menu of dragon meat. Red and White were getting ready to take samples for the archive. These two girls had become a kind of living repository of knowledge in Alex's family.
"He really wasn't lying when he said he'd kill a dragon…" Bilbo muttered without taking his eyes off Alex.
"I'm more surprised at how he killed it. With a brick. A golden brick," Bombur added, still chewing.
The dwarves and hobbit exchanged looks—they all suddenly realized an important fact: Alex had fought a dragon using… a golden brick. Thorin did not take his eyes off Alex, and only he knew the whirlwind of thoughts rushing through his mind.
Alex's girls approached Smaug's body and couldn't hide their amazement at its size. The children immediately ran to their father—Anya, Nyaruko, and Jinx were the first to literally climb onto Smaug's body, bombarding Alex with nonstop questions. Lili and Bella, though among the others, looked at Alex with clear displeasure—the resentment from the recent flight had not yet faded.
The other girls approached the dragon's carcass, many seeing a creature of such size for the first time in their lives. They wanted to touch it, to make sure it was real. Even though Anya had her own pet—a small dragon named Bond—he was still just a hatchling. But Smaug was a true, fully grown dragon, majestic and terrifying.
They kissed Alex, then began examining the carcass. Even the dwarves, including the hobbit Bilbo, came closer—too strong was the temptation to get a glimpse of the fallen Smaug. Only Thorin remained in place, still not taking his eyes off Alex. Noticing this, Alex gave a slight smile, signaling: Erebor is free now.
Thorin barely smiled back.
Giving the others space to touch the dragon and take a few keepsake photos, Alex slowly approached Thorin.
"Your home is free now. I see you're glad about that, Thorin Oakenshield," Alex said, standing next to him, watching as the others gathered around Smaug's body.
"All thanks to you, wizard. I used to not believe in the fate Gandalf spoke of. But now… now I believe it truly led us to this moment," Thorin replied, gratitude in his voice.
"Fate's a complicated thing. It can be both a blessing and a curse. You never know where it will take you. Maybe it gives you a home… or a family. But it's all part of the journey. Tomorrow is unknown to anyone," Alex said, raising a finger as if to emphasize his words.
"And you speak in riddles again, just like any self-respecting wizard should," Thorin smirked, shaking his head.
"Hahaha! Habit," Alex laughed. "But before we return to the kingdom, there's one last step left."
"What step?" Thorin began, but didn't get to finish—Alex suddenly grabbed his head.
Alex's hand glowed with a soft green light. The dwarves from Thorin's company turned around and froze in panic, thinking Alex was attacking their leader. But what they saw next made them step back in horror. Thick black smoke began rising from Thorin's body, radiating ancient and sinister darkness.
Irreversible changes were happening inside Thorin. The thirst for gold, the greed tormenting his soul—vanished. The dark voice in his mind whispering about the Arkenstone, power, and glory suddenly fell silent. He felt incredible relief, as if an unbearable burden had been lifted.
When Alex removed his hand, Thorin opened his eyes and realized that the man before him had just saved him. The dwarf was stunned—and not alone. The other members of the company, as well as Bilbo, rushed to him anxiously, fearing he might have been harmed. But seeing the calm and relief on Thorin's face, everyone exhaled with relief.
"What have you done to me, wizard?" Thorin asked quietly, looking at Alex.
"Sit down. Let's talk. What I'm about to tell you… concerns the entire Durin line," Alex replied, pointing to a massive stone table nearby.
Thorin nodded and followed Alex. Other dwarves, intrigued by the upcoming conversation, followed as well. The girls watched as GIR, MIMI, and Stitch set to work on an important task—dissecting Smaug's carcass. The rest of the girls were sorting the dragon's body parts into useful and useless.
Sitting at the stone table, Alex pulled the Arkenstone from his inventory and placed it in front of Thorin.
"Let's start with the main thing," Alex said, pointing to the stone. "The so-called 'dragon sickness' was partially connected to this artifact."
"May I ask how?" Balin inquired, watching Alex closely.
"The Arkenstone, or as you call it—the Heart of the Mountain—was actually its 'heart.' It's crystallized natural energy. And since nature itself is neutral, its power can be used for both good and evil. But don't worry—right now, the Arkenstone is filled again with neutral, pure energy," Alex explained, noticing the dwarves slightly recoil.
"If my grandfather Thror's sickness was caused by this stone… then what was the second cause of my family's curse?" Thorin asked cautiously, taking the Arkenstone in his hands.
"The second cause was Sauron," Alex answered calmly. "You know the rings for elves, dwarves, and men were forged by Celebrimbor. But few know that Sauron helped create them. He put part of his dark essence into each ring. The ring Thror wore influenced the Arkenstone… Now imagine: a source of natural energy infected by darkness. That was enough to destroy the mind and corrupt the heart. But, as they say, it's all in the past. The line of Durin will no longer be cursed by this sickness," Alex finished, lighting a cigarette.
"You knew this from the beginning, wizard?" Thorin asked, lifting his gaze from the stone to look Alex straight in the eyes.
"Yes and no," Alex replied, flicking ash. "I felt the darkness in your soul—the very one that fueled your greed. I suspected it was connected to the dwarf ring. And when I saw the Arkenstone, everything fell into place."
"You've helped my people again… I don't even know how to thank you," Thorin said quietly, clutching the Arkenstone in his palms.
"That wasn't hard, Thorin. I see a true king in you. And I want to see what you can do, free from the influence of darkness. Like my wife, I enjoy watching souls that shine brighter than the sun. Your soul, Thorin, will shine. You will become a great king—wiser than Thror, stronger than Thrain. The most worthy ruler of the line of Durin."
These words became more than just motivation for Thorin—they became a true purpose. He finally understood: reclaiming Erebor wasn't about treasure or glory. It was about home. A home for all the dwarves who had lost theirs.
The dwarves exchanged surprised glances. Alex's words about Thorin's future sounded like a prophecy. And Thorin, clutching the Arkenstone, felt he had no right to let his people down.
"Well then, enough philosophy," Alex said, turning his gaze to the lake. "Fili, Kili, Bofur, and Oin are already on their way. Which means your company is back together. I helped you reclaim your home and kill the dragon. So…"
"So what?" asked Bilbo, a bit confused.
"That means it's time to throw a party! We're going to eat Smaug's meat. Or did that lizard just occupy the dwarves' home without paying rent? Smaug's going to pay for illegal residence!" Alex said with a wide grin, raising his finger.
Silence fell for a moment, then everyone burst out laughing. Thorin smiled and shook his head, but no one objected. No one asked how Alex knew the four dwarves were already sailing—that was just like him.
The dwarves looked forward to the celebration, especially knowing who would be cooking—Erina, Alisa, and Hisako. They had already tasted their culinary skills and eagerly awaited seconds.
The girls from Alex's family heard the loud laughter and turned around. Alex caught their eyes and made a "drinks" gesture with his hand. They immediately understood—there would be a party. And they were totally on board.
To be continued...
Early access to chapters on my patreon: p*treon.com/GreedHunter