Kai laughed softly in utter disappointment. Yes, he already knew that this was the result they would get if the god be asked why he'd done what he did but still…
"Wow," he said. "And because of your abandonment, you don't revisit it. You don't listen. You don't even remember the names of those in your care."
Kai then looked back at the gods new project, the snow globe that sat there without any being to inhabit it just yet. a miniature world sealed in glass. Cities reduced to fragile specks in sizes and it looked monotonous. Well it is if what Kai saw in the show delivered the full overview of the world. Kai regarded it almost kindly, like one might look at a wounded animal that hadn't realized it was already dying.
"And yet," he continued, tilting his head slightly, "you're so careful with this one."
Umber's jaw clenched as the implication landed exactly where it was meant to.
"You think creation is obligation?" Umber asked, his voice low, controlled and dangerously so.
Kai didn't hesitate to give him back a response
"No," he said. "I think abandonment is a choice. Creation is sacred," he went on. "It is a vow. It's an act. And like all acts, it ends the moment the will behind it falters."
He gestured vaguely toward the countless forgotten worlds and realms birthed in whim, then left to rot all around the living room.
"You call it balance. You call it distance. You call it necessity." His eyes flicked back to Umber. "But strip away the poetry of it and what's left is simple."
"You created worlds that didn't quite feel complete because it isn't complete, not without the seed of chaos in them. And so you abandoned them too. You watched it reach out, knowing you would not answer because you couldn't offer the balance it needed."
"Power doesn't excuse neglect Umber. It just makes it easier to pretend it wasn't a decision."
Umber's fingers tightened and the snow globe trembling.
But kai didn't stop.
"In every world, there are beings with no strength who still take responsibility for what they break. And then there are gods, the beings with infinite power who claim innocence by calling their indifference 'fate.'"
He stepped closer to Umber with a look of absolute amusement.
"Yes," Kai said quietly. "Abandonment is a choice."
Then, his eyes burned with something colder than anger as he gazed at the god.
"And gods," he finished, "are the only ones who pretend they didn't make it."
——————————————-
The door to Umber's house stood shut.
Not slammed shut, there was no dramatic divine fury in the action as one would have expected, but closed with a finality that felt clearly spoke do not return.
Kai stared at it for a long moment, hands in his pockets, head tilted slightly as if listening for something on the other side.
"Well," he said at last, breaking the silence, "that could have gone worse."
Alice let out a sharp laugh, more disbelief than humor. "He kicked us out."
Kai turned to her, genuinely affronted. "I know, right? The audacity. No tea, no biscuits, not even a polite please leave before I erase you from existence. Honestly, what happened to hospitality?"
Quentin crossed his arms. "You did insult him. Repeatedly. And accused him of murder."
Kai blinked. "Was I wrong?"
Quentin opened his mouth, paused, then sighed. "No."
Alice pinched the bridge of her nose. "So… now what?"
Kai's lips curved into a slow, knowing smirk as he began walking away from the house, boots crunching softly against the gravel. "Now we move on to the next phase."
Quentin frowned and hurried to keep up. "What about why we actually came here? The clock? That was kind of important."
"Oh, absolutely," Kai said casually, waving a hand. "We'll get to that. But first, contact established, magical signature confirmed, and valuable information acquired."
Alice glanced back over her shoulder uneasily. "And the part where you nearly got us obliterated?"
Kai shrugged. "Occupational hazard. Besides" he looked sideways at Quentin, eyes gleaming "—he likes you now."
Quentin stopped short. "That is not comforting."
"But it is progress," Kai replied cheerfully. "Goal achieved."
Alice exhaled slowly. "Can we just leave? I'm suddenly very aware that someone here decided to antagonize a god."
She looked pointedly at Kai.
He gasped softly. "Oh, I wonder who that could be."
Then he chuckled, utterly unbothered, and snapped his fingers.
——————————————-
Julia was staring at Kai like he had just suggested detonating the moon which to some extent actually made more sense compared to what he wanted to now do.
"You want to do what now?"
Quentin, standing beside Kai far too calmly for her liking, answered, "He wants to get rid of Umber. And Ember."
Julia blinked once. Then again. "Oh, no, I heard him the first time. I just assumed incorrectly, apparently that he was joking."
Kai gave her a lazy grin. "Julia, if I were joking, I'd be smiling less."
"That's… deeply unsettling."
Before she could say more, the door swung open and Kady and Penny walked in.
Kady dropped down to the couch with a thud and rubbed her eyes. "Okay, I'm exhausted, still slightly traumatized, and running on fumes. What did I miss?"
Julia pointed at Kai. "He's planning to eliminate gods."
Penny stopped mid-step. "…Cool. I'm out."
Kai hadn't even moved when Penny turned around until suddenly he was there, standing directly in front of him and far too close as well.
"It's not toe-to-toe per say," Kai said lightly. "That's messy. Inefficient. No, this is more of a two birds, one very clever trick kind of situation."
Penny stared at him. "You are insane. Do you have any idea how suicidal it is to go after multiple gods?"
"Yes," Kai said. "That's why I'm not asking you to fight them."
Penny narrowed his eyes. "Then why do I feel like I'm about to regret staying?"
Kai clasped his hands behind his back and leaned forward just slightly, smiling like a man about to ruin someone's afternoon.
"Because," he said pleasantly, "I need you for something first."
Penny groaned. "Of course you do."
Kai's smile widened. "Tell me something, how is Mayakovsky doing these days?"
The room went quiet at that question.
Penny's expression flattened. "Why?"
Kai tilted his head, feigning curiosity. "I mean, all that ice up north… it can't be great for the joints. Is the old man holding up? Is he grinding you up good?"
Penny stared at him and saw the annoying smirk Kai was giving him. Oh, he understood the innuendo and for a long moment he just looked at the annoying man, then muttered, "I hate you."
Kai straightened, utterly satisfied. "Yes. Yes, that sounds about right."
—————————————-
Fillory shook again.
Not the polite, oh dear the earth moved kind of shake oh no, this was the aggressive, ceiling-dust-raining, someone is kicking the sandbox variety.
Margo paused mid-stride in the corridor leading to the throne room, eye flicking upward as the roof groaned ominously.
"Oh, for the love of tits," she muttered. "If Ember is throwing another divine tantrum, I swear to all that is sparkly and unholy, I will stab him with a chair."
She adjusted her coat, unimpressed, and kept walking.
The throne room doors were already open when she entered, revealing Eliot standing far too regally for someone currently conspiring, Rafe hovering nearby, and unfortunately the sloth.
The sloth blinked slowly.
Margo stopped dead, stared, and said, "I sure as hell hope that sloth is giving you the answer to why Ember is shaking up this sandbox like a bored toddler."
Eliot didn't even look surprised to see her. He just smiled thinly.
"No," he said pleasantly, "but good news."
Margo arched a brow. "Oh? Because unless that thing just told you how to unmake a god, I'm not feeling optimistic."
"The party," Eliot continued, gesturing vaguely, "is coming together."
Rafe nodded solemnly, as if this meant something deeply political.
Margo sighed. "Great. Is Josh contributing, or is he emotionally unavailable again?"
"Oh, he's contributing," Eliot said. "He's making use of the special recipe."
Margo smirked. "Ah. The one that either fixes everything or poisons half the court."
"Tradition matters," Eliot replied.
They walked together toward the throne. Margo glanced around casually. "You notice the castle's got a bit of a… buzzing problem?"
Eliot sighed, folding his hands. "Yes. Tiny wings is an understatement. Too many opinions."
"Magical insecticide," Margo said lightly.
"That's going to take some work, actually."
"If only," she mused, "we had a way to boot them all out without them noticing."
Eliot opened his mouth and Penny suddenly appeared with Kai who stepped away from Penny and moved around like he owned the place.
"There," Penny said flatly. "Now I can go."
Kai immediately waved his hands. "Shoo. Shoo."
Penny rolled his eyes so hard it was a medical event. He looked at Margo and Eliot.
"Hi."
"Hi," Eliot replied.
Margo gave him a once-over. "You look stressed. Teleport through a god recently?"
Penny sighed and vanished again without another word.
Kai watched him go, then turned his attention to Margo.
His gaze snagged on her face.
On the missing eye.
'Shit,' he thought. 'They got her eye.'
He shook his head slightly, filing that away for later, and clapped his hands together once.
"Right," he said. "What's the crisis?"
Margo and Eliot exchanged a look then, Eliot smiled sweetly.
"We were just discussing… fumigation strategy."
Kai's lips slowly curled into something sharp.
"Diabolical," he said, clearly pleased.