It was already a little past eight in the morning, and I could hear toddlers talking as the girls went to wake them up and see if they needed to go to the potty. They were also weaning off pacifiers, a process that wasn't always easy and often made them cranky. However, these toddlers were good at being distracted from the need for a pacifier, as there were plenty of activities to help them forget their craving for a while.
Things were, of course, a bit more challenging when the toddlers were with me or someone else caring for the babies, because the babies had their pacifiers, which then caused anxiety for the toddlers. But this was just one more new aspect of being a parent.
It felt like every single day was different, and there was always something new for me, and for us, to learn. None of us had truly been parents before; we had been caregivers, looking after babies and cubs, but this – watching toddlers grow and having these issues – was different. It reminded me of how my mom used to tell me about my or my sisters' childhoods, and here I was, living it.
This was something I had believed a part of my life would never involve. Even though our purpose was to procreate, and a lot, I somehow knew my role would be more of a puppy or baby mill than an actual mother. Perhaps I had always enjoyed caring for babies because they were predictable, utterly dependent on me, and I knew exactly what to do with them. But raising children was new territory.
Now, with my older girls – Emmylee, May, Lily, and Vivianne – who had children of their own, I had rather thought they might take the lead in raising them. However, that wasn't quite the case. They managed a few things but made sure I did my part as well, emphasizing that the men had to be involved, too. All of this was rolling around in my mind as we put the final touches on breakfast, which was about to start as soon as the toddlers came in, still happily clad in their pajamas.
"Mama, I'm awake! Watch me!" Sadie shouted, running to me and hugging my legs.
I crouched down, picked her up, kissed her, and smiled.
"Yeah, darling, you are awake. Are you hungry? It's time for breakfast. What shall it be, young lady?" I asked her.
She giggled, and Number Five came towards me, mockingly saying, "Unfair! I need to have this young lady in my arms as well. Come to Daddy, you monkey!"
He snatched her from me, making her giggle as he tickled her, then carried her to her seat.
The toddlers had already finished their bottles of milk but were still hungry. The Salvatores had fried some salmon and pieces of meat, along with fruit purees and a bit of pasta. It was quite a large portion, but then again, these were not human children but supernatural ones, and they ate a lot.
I was piling up my tray. I had gotten my minced steaks and meat sauce, and a bit of mashed sweet potato, as it was gentler on my stomach than regular potato, since my gut didn't appreciate starchy carbs. I also had a good pile of my salted salmon, both fried and fresh.
They had fed me during our preparations, but my husbands were always ready to cram more food into me. There were now five of them; Adam and Charles had gone to work, or wherever. Lepard, Demon, and the five Salvatores were downstairs, and I had Number Two, Four, Five, Nine, and Ten here – my regulars, those most attached to me. They rarely went to Mariella's side because she wasn't as important to them as I was.
The older girls were still tending to the babies, as they had gotten the toddlers settled and eating. By the time breakfast was done, they would be ready to supervise the toddlers with a few of the Salvatores. I went to do my paperwork, and Wulfe was on baby and toddler care duty as well.
It was encouraged for toddlers to taste our food if they wanted, but we also had to make sure they tasted their own. Usually, in the mornings, they were hungry enough to at least taste. Then, we could try something more. I had also made myself ham and mozzarella waffles, both savory and sweet versions with whipped cream, a curd mix, fresh raspberries, and passionfruit.
As I said, my breakfast was substantial. I had my coffee pots ready, already poured into my thermos, even though I knew my dear husbands might take a mug or two despite having their own coffee. It was just our game – to take what is mine.
As the toddlers were settled into their places, bibs fastened, and plates served, they began to eat. Well, sort of. I, too, started my meal, and oh my goodness, it was as delicious as ever. I took a piece of salted salmon, popped it into my mouth, and savored its salty goodness.
Meanwhile, Sadie watched me intently.
As she tasted her fried salmon, she said, "Gimme, Mom, wanna taste."
When I reached for another piece, I relented and gave her a small bite. She chewed it thoughtfully, her focus then returning to her own meal, which was a good sign if it meant her appetite was stimulated.
I sipped my creamy coffee, and Sadie, along with the other children, had their own small, caffeine-laden drinks. Though toddler-friendly, they clearly needed caffeine, so we were trying to incorporate it into their foods as much as possible.
Later, I was discussing a room I had found with May. It was full of designer clothes from 2020-2030. While they were now quite old, they were in pristine condition. May wanted to see them and try them on, but I suggested we do it later. I wasn't really in the mood for a fashion show.
"Really, baby? Dresses, hmm, sounds fun. Worry not, I see that when we have time, we'll check them out," Number Two said calmly.
I rolled my eyes. Having already seen some of the garments, I knew there was one made of the thinnest netting-like material, with strategically placed golden glitter. For instance, Number Five might not approve of me wearing that, especially in public. He's a bit too possessive and dislikes it when I show too much of my body to strangers.
I recall one day at my shop, wearing a tight t-shirt and skinny jeans for just a few hours. Number Five kept me in the backroom making bouquets every time a man walked in. But it was born of love; he wanted me, knew I was his, and didn't want to share. He was also protecting me, owning me. It's simply something I've learned to tolerate, at least to this extent.
As I was daydreaming about all those dresses, it was Lily who decided to challenge me next. My daughters are bright women, but when they were just like me, it was almost like arguing with myself.
Lily said, "Now, Mom, I was thinking I could plant beans in the yard. They grow well, give a nice lush green color, and are not bad to eat or use in food."
"Beans, really?" I replied, as patiently as ever. "But we're carnivores; legumes aren't part of our diet. Besides, watering would also be an issue if the summer is hot. Our yard is nice as it is. I was thinking more along the lines of scented plants: sweet peas, matthiola, a few new roses, clematis, etc."
Then Salvatores joined the discussion. They thought beans would be fun to grow. Since there were so many varieties, they could even compare which was most useful. Number four, he argued that toddlers and babies could use legumes better than adults, and besides, they could sell any surplus if the crops were large. Once again, my girls had gotten the men going, and I was soon overpowered. But that's fine; let them grow beans and stuff.
I was already busy thinking about different sweet peas and pansies, as I wanted ruffled varieties and lots of them. I also considered other annuals I could grow for my arrangements, saving money by not having to buy them all. However, I was wiser now and didn't blurt out all my plans, as the discussion continued about legumes, salads, and what they could safely grow in our large yard. Of course, with lively children running around, those crops would need to be fenced off.
This, in turn, got me thinking about our plot of land, which is quite large, with a forest, an old one, and a lake. I was planning to explore the forest a bit this summer, see what was growing there, if there were wild blueberries or mushrooms, or anything else. Collecting things from nature and teaching the children about them would be fun.
I envisioned taking them for short walks in the forest, showing them all the wonderful and quirky things in life. I had never actually done anything like that before, and the idea just popped into my mind.
The toddlers ate quite nicely, as the food was tasty and they wanted it, which was a win for us. While I was still nibbling my meal, the girls began helping the toddlers down, and they could explore the kitchen. I still felt like I could eat a bit more, and since I had now eaten all I should have, I was planning a treat.
I went to the fridge and snatched a couple of fluffy buns, opened them, and generously spread butter along with my spread on them. Then, I piled on some more salted salmon, lettuce, a bit of tuna flakes, and chopped chives.
I fetched my next thermos of coffee, added sugar and cream, and carried it to the table along with a fresh, big bottle of Coke and a small bottle of Jaffa. As I said, this was a treat, and Number Nine nodded, allowing it since I had already eaten a lot and every bit I consumed was helping my metabolism churn so fast.
I was just checking my phone when I noticed that the flower delivery truck was coming to the house today, so I could get my order. I even hoped he might have some extras so I could get more.
I was deeply lost in thought, planning and thinking, when something quite special happened. For me, it was very special, but the Salvatores didn't quite get it. Wulfe, who was still sitting at the table watching the kids, noticed it.
So, as I was sipping my coffee and reaching for my bun, with the salmon slices peeking out, Sadie walked up to me, grabbed my sleeve, and said, "Gimme fish," pointing at my salmon.
It hit me, it really did, and Wulfe furrowed his brow as my feelings flooded to him through our bond. He was unsure why I was feeling this overwhelming emotion, which I couldn't even name just yet.
Sadie repeated, "Gimme fish."
Number Nine turned around and said, "You can give her salt; it is not so bad for them. Come on, baby."
He looked at me as my trembling hands opened my bun, took a few slices of salmon, and handed them to Sadie, who munched them happily.
Wulfe asked telepathically, "What is it, my unicorn? You are overwhelmed. How? Why? What is going on?"
I took a breath and said out loud, "She is mine. She is truly mine."
Number Nine furrowed his brow, as he couldn't understand my very emotional voice either.
Even after carrying and giving birth to babies, I knew I would have to give them up. Therefore, I think a part of me, perhaps as a form of protection, kept its distance from them. I never saw much of myself in my children, rather more of Damon. And despite my daughters being quite like me, it still felt as though I were a surrogate, or that parts of me were in the babies, but not truly me.
But now, all of that fell apart.
As I regained a steadier voice, I heard myself say, "This is a huge blast from the past. It's hard to explain, but I guess I've always protected myself in some way, as I never saw myself so much in my children as I see Damon, through and through. I had this notion that the very core of me, the original, human version, would never be passed on to my children. But I was wrong."
Wulfe nodded, waiting for me to continue.
I swallowed, emotions flooding me, and though I struggled, my voice still worked. "When I was barely two, my dad gave me a piece of salted salmon to taste, and I loved it. I loved it so much that I asked my dad for more. And just now, Sadie did exactly that. She's the same age I was, and she looks like me, wanting salted salmon, just like my human self did centuries ago. So, she is truly mine, wholly. She has the core of me, and it's something I never thought would be passed on. I believed that part was mostly my memories and habits, but that part lives in me, and now I have passed it on."
Number nine came to sit beside me, his eyes also glistening as he saw my memories. He recalled how my mother had told me about this, how I had wanted more fish, and she had been worried it was too salty for me.
I knew this changed everything, breaking something within me that I had kept hidden and protected. Now, it had all come out. Despite having a little less than ten years left in this life, a new pain entered my heart as I thought about having to let them go when the time came.
Up until now, it had been relatively easy. Sure, it hurt when it happened, but this pain… I suppose I am now fully a mother, a parent who doesn't want to let their children go.
Sitting there, as the alpha female of our pack, Mimi Salvatore, I realized something profound. Even though centuries had passed since I was last human, this tiny toddler had just shown me that a part of me still existed within my very genes. It was astonishing, given my unique genome and the absence of human DNA. Yet, something had clearly been passed down, and with it came a whole new set of emotions.
Responsibility washed over me, along with a powerful urge to watch these children grow. I wondered if Sadie was an anomaly or if this latent humanity existed in others, too. Would my future offspring inherit something from me, or was I merely projecting my own desires onto them? Was this part of me, the less killer, the less beast, the less animal, the spark of my lost humanity, still alive?
Lost in these thoughts, I ate my bun, having already given every piece of salmon to Sadie. Confused yet immensely proud, I felt utterly vulnerable, experiencing emotions I couldn't yet name. My life had just taken a monumental turn, and there was no turning back. Something within me had irrevocably shifted, leaving me to wonder whether this change was for better or for worse.