So I could teleport on and off the Hogwarts campus, because it was impossible to ward against everything.
Once we finished up our meal, we said our goodbyes and Daphne and I teleported back to the castle. I'd considered taking the rest of the time as a holiday, but my girl was feeling a bit overwhelmed after everything. Curing her sister had been delayed, and going home seemed like a better idea.
When we arrived, we took a walk out onto the lawn, heading down to the edge of the forest to walk in the starlight. We didn't actually enter, since I was worried about whatever lived in there, but the edge was more than safe with me around.
"What are you thinking?" I asked, my arm over her shoulder. I expected a sarcastic or biting response, but she just laid her head on me, quietly thinking.
After a minute of silence, the quiet stretching on so long I thought she might not answer at all, she finally spoke. "I don't know." She said finally. "Losing my mother was unbearable. She and my dad were betrothed from the time they could walk. He married into the family, since his own was of a lower station, but he was clever and resourceful enough that even my mother's brother Gareth, the eldest son, didn't fight him too much on taking over."
I didn't know where she was going with this, but I let her continue, she clearly needed to get this out. "But even he couldn't fix this. My sister was dying, and now…you come out of nowhere, save her life, save mine, and offer me power and immortality. I suppose I'm looking for the catch? Nothing like this can happen for free."
Rolling my eyes, I grabbed her chin and pulled it up so I could give her a long, slow, kiss. Looking deep into her eyes, I said. "Cash, grass, or ass. Nobody rides for free."
Her face twisted into a mask of half embarrassment and half laughter as she elbowed me in the ribs. "Beast!" She hissed. "The one time I'm feeling emotional you have to make a joke out of it?"
I shrugged. "Because I don't like it. My princess is a snooty upright bitch who always has a plan B. I don't need you acting all grateful and kittenish. It weirds me out. I'll take all my gratitude out of that cute little ass of yours, and we can both enjoy the process. Be yourself, Daph, I don't need you to fawn over me because you feel indebted."
Her cheeks went red as she looked away snootily. "Well…I suppose when you put it that way. You've already got Bones to fawn all over you. I ought to keep you in line or who knows what you'll do."
"There's my stone cold bitch." I cheered. "I'm not going to always listen to you. Or mostly listen to you. Or almost ever listen to you. But I need you to challenge me. I'll get a big head otherwise. Don't tell me what you think I need to hear."
She snorted. "Until you stuff your obscene cock up that mountain of meat Granger drags along behind her and then we all have to listen to her natter on in our ears."
"Bitch please." I scoffed. "I'd rather die than live with that shit for ten thousand years." I paused. "Not that I wouldn't ruin that juicy ass of hers. But like…only casually. And she doesn't seem like the type. You don't need to worry about me bringing her into this." I snickered. "If I was going to recruit a know it all it would probably be Lily Moon. Who could say no to those giant goth knockers."
That got me another glare. "I'll tell Bones you said that. See how you deal with her tearing up and feeling underappreciated. I may not be able to make you keep it in your pants, but I'm sure she can."
I smiled at her sweetly. "In an ideal world I'd be wrecking one of you every night. You sure that you can handle taking my dick every other day?"
Her blush this time was almost atomic as she looked away. "I don't…that's not. Don't flatter yourself. Who wants to stuff themselves full of your ridiculous weapon every other night. I don't believe Bones can do it either!"
The pouting was so adorable I had to snag her for another long kiss. "Don't worry so much about other girls." I said with a chuckle. "You and Susan are already too much for me to handle. Once things calm down I might be open to sharing the love a bit, if only for the sake of your hip bones, but for now I'll just have to hold back a little."
This time, there was no stammering or complaints, though the pout did stick around as she laid her head back on my shoulder. Despite her pride, Daphne was actually worried about keeping up with me sexually. I can't say I wasn't a little proud. Still, I knew she'd enjoyed herself enough to want more, just maybe next time I'd be less…enthusiastic.
November 25th, 2010. London, England 2:00 PM BST
"I can't believe we can just…leave now." Said Susan in wonder as she looked around the alley I'd teleported us to. After returning from Romania, we'd caught her up on everything, and she'd insisted on being present for the big meeting with Shaggy, Daphne, and the talking dog. Honestly, despite all the magic I'd seen and crazy shit I'd done over the last few months, a talking dog was easily the coolest thing I'd ever heard of, and I was pretty excited myself.
Daphne wrinkled her nose in disgust. "It is convenient, though clearly less so than being teleported somewhere…sanitary." Shooting me a frown, she demanded. "You couldn't bring us to a bed and breakfast or something?"
I rolled my eyes. "Get off your high horse, princess. We don't want people knowing I can do this. The rules about leaving the grounds are logistical mostly, and as adults I don't have to justify going anywhere, but I don't want it getting out I can do seemingly impossible shit like teleporting through the wards."
She sneered at me. "Though apparently you don't mind people knowing you can punch bludgers out of the air."
"There are lots of feasible magical ways to increase physical strength and durability." I said testily. "That's not impossible, everyone probably just assumed I pulled some wandless magic out of my ass. With my reputation for power it's not a stretch. THIS would be a whole different ballgame."
Suzie stepped between us, grabbing an arm in each hand. "Well I think it's a lovely opportunity to spend time together. It's a good thing we're seeing each other, honestly, or the others would be getting suspicious." She blushed prettily. "Although, Hannah has been asking me about how…intimate, we've been."
That got a snort from my blonde. "Enjoy having your spine properly aligned while you still can. I don't think I'll ever be the same from the waist down." She pointed at me sharply. "And don't you dare smile at that you brute. I deserve an order of merlin for letting you rut that beast into me."
We emerged from the alley, heading toward the pub where we'd arranged to meet the other group, and I choked back a snicker. "Yes dear. So how about Christmas, are either of you two planning to stay at Hogwarts? Because if not…well, I wouldn't be against having company."
Admittedly, my selfish reasoning was to introduce them to Seras before bringing her to school. If she had friends already she might not be as thrown by all the magic. I very carefully did NOT let myself imagine adding her to my growing relationship, or how good her massive vampire breasts would look as she bounced in my lap.
Suzie, bless her heart, practically got stars in her eyes. "You want us to come home with you for Christmas? Will you introduce me to your mother?" She bit her lip worriedly as she tugged at her hair, trying to fix messiness that wasn't there. "Oh what do I wear? Does she like conservative dress, or something more muggle?"
"I'm sure she'll adore you." Daphne said acidly. "Sadly you'll be meeting her alone. My father has requested me at Christmas dinner. He's extended an invitation to you as well Ryan, if you're so inclined." She sniffed in distaste. "My stepmother will be putting it on. The little trollop."
I smiled at her sulking. "I'll talk to my mom. We usually go out, but maybe there's some wiggle room. Suzie, you sure your Aunt won't mind you spending the break with me?"
Her beaming smile was answer enough, but she shook her head quickly anyway. Before she could respond though, we heard a crash and some rattling dishes coming through the open door of the pub we were heading to. After the sound, a loud voice complained. "Like, you were the ones who said bottomless shepherds pie man! We already paid."
Glancing at the girls, I heard a strange, slightly muffled voice whine. "Reah, already raid." Frowning, we arrived at the door to see a tall, sandy haired guy with some chin scruff in a red shirt and jeans glaring reproachfully at a puffed up overweight man with huge forearms and a red puffy face under an obvious toupee.
Sitting behind the guy was a large friendly looking great dane, big sad eyes wide as he hid behind an absolute bombshell with red hair and big violet eyes. Figuring this was probably our party, I stepped up to impose myself between the big dude and who I assumed was Shaggy. "Whoa there bud. No need to get so worked up. I can cover any incidentals for my friends here."
They both blinked in confusion at the derail. Shaggy grinned sheepishly at me. "Like, thanks man." He scratched the back of his head. "We didn't bring enough to cover anything but the original bill. That exchange rate is like, killer."
Flipping the pub manager a galleon, I raised an eyebrow. He bit the coin and then nodded happily before turning to leave. I held out a hand to the hippie. "It's no problem. I'm Ryan. This is Susan and Daphne. We're the ones who are supposed to meet you guys. Vincent sent us to help."
His eyes went wide. The dog blinked at me. "Relp?" He asked, his friendly voice making me grin. "Rith the…" He looked side to side dramatically. "Rhost?"
"I suspect you guys could handle a roast all on your own." I joked dryly, glancing at the stack of thoroughly cleared dishes. "But we ARE going to help with the chest of demons. At least for the moment. We're looking for one of the ghosts for our own reasons, but we don't know when you'll run into him."
Daphne…the other Daphne? DB (short for Daphne Blake) smiled gratefully. "We really appreciate that. We're kind of out of our depth here. We solve mysteries for fun, and have for years, but real spirits are kind of out of our wheelhouse." She started, blushing lightly. "Oh, sorry, I'm Daphne by the way."
Shaggy's eyes widened. "Oh, duh. Sorry, dude. I like, totally spaced. I'm Shaggy, and that there is my best friend Scooby-Doo! Say hi Scoob."
"Ri!" Said Scooby enthusiastically as he waved a paw at us. I didn't hear much past that because Suzie's earsplitting squeal as she tackle hugged the adorable talking pooch temporarily deafened me.
"HE'S SO CUTE!" She shrieked in a voice that I think might have cracked the windows. Scooby gave us all a smug doggy grin as she snuggled into him, and I couldn't even be mad at the big pooch.
Looking over to Shaggy, I grinned. "Susan is a dog person. Nice to meet you guys, Vincent said you had some leads on one of the thirteen in the city?" It was pretty convenient it was in London, but then again, this place was old as dirt and full of historical buildings and shit. It made sense ghosts would be into that.
As we sat down, a pretty waitress bustled over, shooting me a shy smile before flinching at Daphne's cold stare. "Ello' luvs." She said in a thick cockney accent. "What can I get'cha?"
"Like…is it ok if we order too?" Shaggy asked hopefully. "We're still feeling pretty peckish."
Scooby snickered. "Reah…reckish." At the dogs comment, Suszie gave me a sad pout, and I just rolled my eyes.
"Yeah, sure. Order whatever you want." I could always refill on cash while we were in London. Plus I still had hundreds of galleons.
DB (the redhead Daphne) winced. "You shouldn't have done that. You don't know what you've unleashed. Sorry in advance." She smiled wryly at my Daphne. "I love your shoes by the way, they're adorable."
Daphne blinked at her, lips quirking slightly. "Thank you. These are my favorite pair. I had them made custom. Yours are lovely as well, are they Prada? My best friend often brings me m- many fashion magazines." She stopped short of saying muggle, since these people probably didn't know about the wizarding world. They obviously knew magic existed, but we'd need to feel out how much.
"And sixteen meat pies." Finished Shaggy, as my attention turned back to the unusually skinny hippy. I blinked at him incredulously as he turned to Scooby. "How about you Scoob? You want anything?"
What the fuck had I just missed. Happily the dog nodded with enthusiasm. "Reah! Reaks, Rish and Chips, Rotch reggs, and Rurry."
Shaggy's face lit up. "Like, zoinks! I forgot about the curry! Eight bowls of that please." He paused as if he was uncertain and looked at me. "I kind of want dessert, but like, I don't wanna go overboard."
I rolled my eyes, grabbed a handful of galleons from my pouch and shoved them at the waitress. "These are real gold, just bring them whatever they want. These should cover it. I'll have the shepherds pie." I glanced at my girls. "You want anything? Other Daphne? Is it ok if I just call you DB? Vincent said your last name is Blake."
She shrugged. "DB works." I had to resist the urge to change it to DD because she was way more stacked than I'd expected under the suit jacket she was wearing. "And I already ate earlier." She glared at her friends. "SOME of us actually get full."
Scooby and Shaggy both looked at her with disdain. "Like, we do serious cardio, man." Shaggy said, making a muscle. "Gotta stock up on fuel."
"That's the most optimistic way of saying you're big scaredy cowards I've ever heard." DB sniffed. Turning back to me after I ordered a root beer for my drink and Suzie and Daphne ordered a strawberry milkshake and a meat pie respectively, she shot me an apologetic smile. "Sorry about those two. I love them both like family, but they're not exactly the easiest to put up with. Anyway, to your earlier question, yes, we've found some traces."
Shaggy grimaced. "Like, we're pretty sure one of them is at the Rathburn manor. Not that it's a surprise, since the whole place is totally haunted." He chuckled nervously. "Tell me again why we have to be the ones to do this?" He asked our newest redhead.
"Because YOU opened the chest of demons." She said mercilessly. "Don't be such wusses. We have backup now. Vincent said these guys are serious ghost catchers." I raised an eyebrow at that, since I'd never caught a ghost, but then, these were devil ghosts, and I was a living devil, so I had to assume I had some advantage there.
The drinks arrived, and Suzie took her milkshake with relish. My redhead had a serious sweet tooth, and it was pretty cute. She tasted it and brightened. "This is really good! We should come to more places like this." She shot me a shy smile, and I returned it with a big grin, I was down for more dates.
Daphne glanced at DB, very deliberately ignoring the exchange. "So, how exactly did you end up with these two anyway?" She gave Shaggy a withering look. "No offense, but they're not exactly fashion icons. You seem to have excellent taste. Is this some sort of charity initiative?"
"Like, hey!" Shaggy said indignantly. "We're the coolest guys around. And Daphne has been friends with us for years."
DB chuckled lightly, glancing fondly at the other two. "They're like the idiot brothers I never had." She admitted. "I couldn't imagine not having them around. We used to solve mysteries with some other friends growing up."
And that's how we got onto the subject of their capers as teens. The food arrived, and we all settled in to listen to the tales of Mystery Inc. I had to admit, Vincent might not have screwed us over here. These seemed like pretty cool people. After the meal we'd head for this Rathburn manor place. Shouldn't be too much trouble, even pretending to be normal.
AN:// Apparently I was wrong, and FRIDAY'S chapter has the big reveal, so people can continue guessing if they want lol. I could have sworn it was this one. Meanwhile the most recent chapter has gotten down to the serious business of real canon welding across all the material, and there is so much to play with. I'll give you a hint about the final piece of the puzzle though.
November 25th, 2010. London, England 3:00 PM BST
After watching Shaggy and Scooby ingest a truly mind boggling amount of food, DB managed to bully them into leading us toward the feeling they were getting of one of the 13 ghosts being nearby. They loaded us up in their van and took us to the Rathburn manor, which was down an old dark street, and as we approached, I felt the hair on my neck stand up.
Slowing down, I pulled Daphne and Suzie aside. "Be careful in here." I said softly. "I'm getting a weird vibe. Keep your wands handy, but don't use them unless necessary."
Because we didn't know them well, we were sticking with the statute of secrecy for now. Scooby and Shaggy were nice enough, and DB was pretty cute, but keeping ourselves on the DL was the safest way to move forward.
My girls palmed their wands. We were in normal muggle clothes, luckily, so no robes to hide. I even slipped my own wand up the sleeve of my jacket just in case. Once that was done, we approached the front of the manor slowly.
Before we reached the door though, Shaggy and Scooby stopped cold. "Like, welp, this is our stop." Said the hippy with an audible gulp. "This is close enough to find the g-g-ghost, and you guys can like, handle it from there." He chuckled nervously, starting to back away.
DB snorted, grabbing his ear tightly and twisting. "Oh no you don't. None of that. You need to be here to open the chest and recapture the ghost." She glared at him. "You DID bring the chest of demons, right?"
He nodded sulkily. "Yeah. It's like…in the van, man." He pointed to the bulky red van we'd driven here in. It honestly seemed like it might be armored or something, the shape was very defensive, and the tires looked big and reinforced. Sort of like a giant ATV.
"So…not to be THAT guy." I said slowly. "But exactly why did a d-despicable ghost." I saved myself at the last second from saying devil. "Come to a place like this."
DB grimaced. "Vincent said he's looking for something. Some magic wand that's super powerful. It's supposed to be hidden here. We aren't sure which ghost it is, but luckily they were cut off from news in the chest. Vincent says the wand isn't here anymore. Hasn't been for decades."
"A wand?" I asked suspiciously."How…interesting. What's so special about it?" Rankor was a vampire devil and practiced blood magic. I hadn't heard about him using a wand, but devils COULD so maybe it was him? Daphne grabbed my hand, squeezing tightly in excitement, and I returned the gesture.
She shrugged. "Apparently it makes spells super powerful or something? It's called the Elder Wand. I can't believe there are really people who can do magic. That's so cool!" I grinned at Suzie, and Daphne tried to hold back a smirk. DB turned to Scooby and Shaggy. "We need you to open the chest to trap the ghost when we find him. So what's it gonna take for you to come inside with us?" I could tell from her exasperation that this wasn't their first time having this conversation. She walked to the van, opened the back, and jimmied open a door panel, pulling out a box. "Would you do it for a Scooby Snack?"
Both of them perked up. I raised an eyebrow at the duo, but Scooby squinted hard hard at the box. "Roo." He said, holding up two…fingers? He had weirdly digital paws.
She thought for a minute, then nodded. Reaching into the box, she pulled two pairs of small brown biscuit like treats, and then threw them. Shaggy and Scooby both ran for them, and to my surprise, Shaggy managed to intercept three of them. I blinked at the maneuver because he and Scooby had both moved so fast even I'd seen them blur a bit. They were both really fast.
With the two of them sufficiently bribed, DB went to the front of the van and pulled out the chest, opting to carry it instead of having the two of them do it, in case they ran away.
As we approached the front door though, we quickly realized someone else was here. A tall, toned woman in tight brown leather pants and a sleeveless shirt that showed off strong arms. She had a literal sword on her back, and was knelt down picking the lock on the door of the manor, which did truly wonderful things for her ass in those pants.
I cleared my throat. "Hi." I said dryly as she nearly jumped out of her skin. She spun to glare at us, drawing her sword in a smooth motion. Shaggy and Scooby yelped and jumped behind me. "Can I help you with something?"
"No." She snapped in a surprisingly upper crust accent for a girl in such badass clothes. "You can't. This place is dangerous, and I'm here to look into some suspicious activity for…the city. You need to leave."
Raising an eyebrow, I cocked my head to the side, curious about what she was doing here. Did she know about the ghost? Who the hell did she work for. "Why?" I asked, not expecting an actual answer. "What makes it dangerous?"
"There's a gas leak." She spat. "Now go. You're not getting in here. Don't make me knock you around a bit to convince you."
I considered overpowering her and taking the sword, but Daphne stepped in to save the day with her bitchiness. "Look. You were just picking that lock, so you clearly aren't supposed to be here. We have business inside, and we WILL go in. If you even manage to drive us off, we'll just go in the back or something, so if you're so tough why don't you come along to protect us?"
The sword wielding blonde grimaced, Lowring her blade. "Bollocks. You mean that don't you?"
We all just smiled at her. She huffed and put the blade away. "Right. Fine. I don't want the deaths of a bunch of random kids on my conscience, so I guess you can come in with me." She held out a hand for me to shake, apparently deciding I was the leader. "Tanith Low. Nice to meet you I suppose. Don't get in my way or I'll bust your arse."
Ignoring her overly tight grip, I grinned at her. She reminded me a bit of Seras, though her hard eyes told me she was far more comfortable with violence than my vampire friend. This woman was nobody's bitch, and she'd put a hole in you to prove it. She'd been awfully good with that sword.
Daphne cleared her throat. "I don't suppose you'll tell us what you're really doing here? Because I don't for a second believe you 'work for the city'." Her tone was pointed, and a little snippy, and I realized I MIGHT have been a bit obvious ogling Tanith's tight little ass in those pants.
"I work for 'none of your fucking business' if you must know." she said sweetly. "Who in turn reports to directly to 'shove it up your arse' from the 'go fuck yourself' division. I like your shoes by the way." She said, unconsciously echoing DB from earlier.
"As fun as this is." I drawled. "And you two being ten seconds from tearing each other's clothes off is VERY fun for me, I assure you." I ignored Daphne's glare as I got their attention back. "I think we should actually get inside, before someone calls the real cops and Tanith has to shed even the pretense of respectability."
Said sword girl got an offended look on her face. "Oi! You take that back! I'm not respectable."
Walking past her, I grabbed the knob of the door and turned it. Hard. Something snapped in the mechanism, and the door swung loudly open. "Huh." I said blandly. "Guess you didn't try the knob before deciding to pick it." I was actually pretty lucky there was no dead bolt. "After you. Since you wanted to 'protect us'."
She scoffed. "Like I don't know you just want to stare at my arse in these pants."
"Yes, I'm sure you wear skin tight leather with no discernible underwear to hide your crippling body shyness." I stopped flirting with the sex goddess in the leather pants as my girlfriends both glared at me. Clearing my throat, I gestured inside again. "Like I said though, you decided to 'protect' us, so you can be first inside."
She nodded, heading in, and I tried hard not to look at her ass again, to only moderate success. "So." Tinith said as she crept soundlessly inside, feet not making a single scuff. "Mind telling me about that big creepy box the redhead is carrying?"
"That's our drink cooler." I lied without blinking. "We're here to party. Packed full of beer. How about you? What's the deal with that big ass sword?"
Apparently deciding to tell an equally ridiculous lie, Tanith just shrugged. "I needed an empty place for a hair cut. I use this giant straight razor, so it can get a bit messy." It seemed she was just as reticent to tell us what she was doing as we were to tell her.
As she stepped over the threshold I heard a hissing clack, my eyes jerked up to the corner of the room, where I saw a menacing spider the size of a manhole cover glaring down at us all. Tanith, acting seemingly on instinct, bolted right for it at top speed.
I wasn't sure what she was going to do to get to it, and was coming up with possible paths, when she hit the wall and kept going, her center of gravity shifting so she was running UP the wall. Her sword flashed, the spider split in two, and she pushed off the wall into a tight backflip, landing on the ground daintily.
The second after she hit, the two halves of the spider slammed into the ground before melting into some sort of green slime and then vanishing. Tanith flipped her hair and glanced over a shoulder at us. "Now do you want to turn back? This isn't a game."
"No." I said. "It's not. And you're clearly not some hot eccentric girl looking for a shave and a haircut. So why don't I let you know what's going on." I gestured to the chest. "We're here looking for a ghost that came out of that box. The only way to get rid of it is to put it BACK in the box. The tall hippy and the dog let it out, so they're the only ones who can do it."
Scooby perked up. "Rog?" He said in confusion. "Rhere?" I suppressed my urge to crack up at that, though Suzie didn't.
Tanith stared at us like we were crazy. "Well…that's a new one." She glanced at Scooby. "The talking dog lends some credibility to your story, however. I suppose I'll take your word for it, I have a trip to Ireland in the morning. So, how exactly are we supposed to do this?"
I smiled at her casual nonchalance, but sadly I didn't think it was going to be quite so easy. "I'd probably start with figuring out why the walls are bleeding." I pointed over her shoulder at the dark red liquid streaming down the walls of the wide open entryway.
"Bollocks." She said again. "That's the last thing I needed. Well then, I suppose I really will take the lead then, won't I?" She gave me a sly smirk. "That is, if you don't mind, pretty boy?" Without waiting for a response she turned and strode further into the house, hips swaying as she walked.
I turned to glance at the others, and with a confirming nod, we folLowd behind her. Tanith appeared to be informed in a different way than we were, and I knew jack shit about ghost hunting anyway. Admittedly, the view didn't hurt either.
AN:// And the final piece of the puzzle is...Skulduggery Pleasant! For those of you who don't know it, it's a series about a Skeleton Detective who works in a world of sorcerers and his apprentice. The power ceiling is extremely high and there are dark gods and monsters involved, it's a great series. Don't worry too much though, I'm not planning to toss you in the deep end. I wont be sticking to the books and am planning my own plotline with all the elements mixed in