Gynesis didn't even see whoever said those words, but he didn't need to, the aura of the unknown entity spoke volumes as to who just spoke.
On its own, the exorcist's body dashed to his nearest weapon, that being a pair of talismans on the table. In one scrambling motion he went from lounging on the couch to brandishing golden ticket of banishment in each hand like they're knives as he stood staring at his front door.
On the other hand, Mugen had also jumped into a combat stance, his calloused hands tightly wrapped around a sword he had hidden in his pocket. Less than a second ago it was but a pile of mere scrap metal, useful for little else than to be sold to a junkyard for spare change. and now its a deadly curved blade in the hands of a capable warrior.
"Such a presence, it's an unimaginable evil... More so than even an onryu,"The man in red muttered aloud, eyes narrowing in focus. "How did it slip by every one of my detection barriers without setting at least one off?"
The source of the sound was close, in fact, if Gynesis's senses were to be believed, it was right behind his front door. A fact that seemingly didn't even phase the foxy Lazarus, who was casually strolling back from the kitchen. A stark contrast to the reaction of the two humans, who were both standing side by side, weapons at the ready.
"What the fuck is that? What the fuck is that?!" The fox eared male questioned aloud, pointing right at the door with a clawed digit, eyes slightly widened in surprise.
"Brehdda I doh fuckin know!" Mugen answered for both himself and his friend with more exasperation than a family of four put together.
Standing before the threat at hand, with nothing but a piece of finely cut wood between himself and whoever just declared they are about to claim a victim, Gynesis clenched his teeth and reached for his door. It would be quite annoying if he had to replace it a fifth time this week due to no fault of his own. Meanwhile the blonde and the ginger started bickering in the background.
"Fuck you mean you don't know? Aren't you an exorcist too?" Asked Lazarus, looking at Mugen like he just said water isn't wet.
'Seriously, 5 break ins in under 7 days? What kind of bullshit ass barriers did that old scammer teach me that they can just get bypassed by anyone with a lick of magical knowledge?' Thought the man with purple hair, grimacing at the fact that his home was being encroached on yet again. Even if he was smiling while turning the knob.
"I don't care who the Exorcist IRS sends, I'm not paying my taxes!" Declared Gynesis, his attitude clearly showing how annoyed he was feeling at getting his movie night interrupted. His body language reflecting a coiled spring as he gripped his talismans hard enough for knuckles to turn white.
Before him stood a seven foot tall redhead with black upside down power symbols in her green eyes with black scleras. Sporting the kind of tight fitting outfit a woman would wear to the gym as she looked down at the man who answered the door with a slight smile.
Keeping his gaze above her chest, which was going to start hurting his neck soon, the exorcist scanned the entity that towered above him by ten inches in seconds. Staring daggers right into her gaze as he did nothing to hide the already displayed hostility towards the stranger at his door.
'Yep, it's her, she said it.' He concluded, not needing much evidence to confirm the source of that unfathomable evil to be this amazonian built beauty standing before him. 'Okay so... Winning might prove to be difficult, but it's doable. Even then, I'd at least need Valori and Mugen's help for that. And the former is a little busy sleeping right now... Fuck it we ball!'
"Beat it." He threw that command out not expecting it to work, but still hoped against hope that she would just leave if told to.
"I didn't come to collect your taxes, boi~" Answered the totally newly introduced ginger as she leaned forward to get to eye level with Gynesis, whispering her words to him as if it was some kind of secret. "In fact, I'm not here for you, alone... Your blonde friend is my real target, but I know you to well to assume you won't step in my way~"
And it was he predicted, that shit did NOT work. If that growing smile on her face was anything to go by, it seemed to only entertain the woman a little. Like she was pleasantly surprised by his display of such nerve.
'She had me in the first half not gonna lie,' Thought the exorcist as he began subtly channeling his Qi into his talismans, preparing to banish this evil entity back to wherever she crawled out of. 'But that second half of her statement was definitely not normal. What did she mean by "real target"? That sounds kinda wild not gonna lie.'
"Aye bhai who D ass by D door dey-" Mugen , apparently done with his offscreen shouting match with Lazarus, found himself stepping up to the open doorway, stopping himself dead in his tracks upon laying eyes on the evil woman in front of his roommate's doorway.
To say he was struck by the belle before him would be an understatement. The man was caught completely off guard, struck, smitten even, by the inhumanly beautiful person he was laying eyes on. His eyes didn't even go lower than her very face. He didn't have the time to bother leering at the near perfect hourglass shape of her body, nor her magnificent chest or wide hips before getting stun locked.
"Mi BOMBO!" The man couldn't stop himself from shouting in surprise as he put a hand over his mouth. After getting completely completely flashbanged like that, it was only fair to let out such a reaction. Even freezing in place as his mental resources suddenly found themselves overloaded with visual stimuli.
And even then, after already laying witness to easily the hottest woman he'd seen in his life, Mugen knew this woman was not to be trusted. In fact, her beauty, easily enough to make top class supermodels green with envy, only added to his weariness. Which paradoxically allowed him movement yet again. A privilege he wasted no time in exercising by looking anywhere but directly at her, freeing up those precious mental faculties..
"See something ya like, hm?" Taking a bit more sultry tone, she tilted her head in curiosity, looking Mugen over like he was an interesting book she wanted to pick up.
"Gyn! This is the third time in five days! Can you go one work week without getting some babe trying to kill us?!" His accent gone for a second, the lack of surprise and abundance of anger within Mugen's words painted a clear picture: This is a pretty typical scene for the two.
"Look, gyal, I just wanna watch some Stuart Little and go to bed, so can we skip to the part where we fight please? Cuz let's be real, you're not here to sell us girls scout cookies. And with a presence that evil, you're not here to discuss our lady and savior Lady Purple Heart either."
Pinching his nose bridge in a quickly growing annoyance, the blonde decided he wanted to hit the IRL skip cutscene button on his potential adversary. Something that either impressed or further amused the devil in prada before the two men. And made the purple-haired one sigh and shake his head like he wasn't annoyed too.
"Since you're so eager to trade blows, why don't we trade names first, then we can just get right into the fun part, agreed?" The lady offered casually, stepping right into Gynesis's apartment like she owned the place and leaning on the door frame.
The two mortal men looked between each other and nodded before returning their gazes to the last to speak. Both opened their mouths simultaneously.
"Gynesis Urahara, exorcist"
"Mugen Urahara, adventurer" The two stated, their voices synched for just a second before they paused in wait for their enemy's response.
Without a moment's hesitation, she snapped her fingers, and suddenly the room the two were in wound up much bigger than it was a second ago. Not only that, but Lazarus was gone. The two facts put together did nothing to alleviate the unease that was at the back of the two's minds. Quite the opposite, actually.
'Looks like she's put us in some kind of reality marble. Or perhaps a pocket dimension of sort?' Gynesis began spitballing as to why his apartment grew tens of times in volume consumed out of nowhere. 'For some reason, I can't even get a bearing of what she just did, like her aura is obfuscated by her very essence... How tiresome...'
"Vinaya, Lioness Sin of Pride," The redhead answered with a giggle and a bow as she gave her name, eyes yet to move from Mugen since he showed up in front of her. "Now, let the games begin!"
On those words, Vinaya rushed at the nearest mortal to her, that being Gynesis himself. Arm cocked back for a basic jab. Aimed right for his face.
Seeing the blow coming, the target raised his arms into a crossguard, barely intercepting the hardened fist that was sent right for his face.
**CRUSH!**
On impact, it was clear to Gynesis that this woman had some kind of sleeper build, because that punch freaking hurt. And even though he didn't get smacked in the face, the man was still sent skidding back a few feet. And both his forearms ended up breaking as well, a fact he fixed with the flick of his wrist.
'Damn, she's fast, maybe faster than son- I mean faster than me. Maybe even Mugen...' in the back of his mind, Gynesis found himself almost making a terrible joke, And even if nobody would've heard it, he wasn't living down such a corny attempt at humor if he had committed to it.
Over with Mugen, he was already on the offensive, shooting out a bolt of lightning from his pointed middle and index fingers.
"Lightbulb!" Called out Mugen as he took his turn to attack.
**CRACK!**
The attack ended up doing nothing as Vinaya casually snatched the bolt out of the air. Jumping a couple inches before her palm made contact with the attack.
"Uh uh uh~" Wagging her finger at the man, the Lioness Sin casually threw it back at Mugen with a spin and a slight grin.
The blond, caught off guard by the unusual retaliation method, raised his right hand to receive the return to sender. With her feet still off the ground and hand tightly gripping the bolt. In that second, a lightbulb went off above his head.
Back with the exorcist, he was busy turning his Ofudas into holy knuckle dusters, or knuckle wraps considering that's what he did with them. Finishing the process just in time to watch his ally catch his own lightning and yank their shared opponent to himself.
"Crosses!" Declared the lightning user upon casting another skill, this one binding his target to himself through the arc both currently held in their hands. By shooting a powerful and continuous flow of magical lightning from himself to his target.
**BZZT!**
"Ah~!" Not seeing it coming, the Lioness Sin ended up getting caught by the cunning move, her muscles locking up from the sudden surge tearing its way throughout her body. "Ngh~!"
That didn't explain the sound that escaped her lips, however. Nor the slight tinge of pink on her cheeks. Luckily for the Sin, neither of which went noticed by the duo before her.
Unlike the puny bolt that was more of a heat source than anything else known as Lightbulb, Crosses wasn't a one and done style of move. 'It's been a while since I had the chance to pop this one.' The mortal mused as he kept the move active. 'With the biggest drawback being the need to maintain constant contact, her grabbing my Lightbulb was low key a blessing in disguise.'
With a thud, the now paralyzed opponent slammed onto the floor, barely in control of her muscles enough to land on her knees instead of her face thanks to her target's skill. Even then, Vinaya didn't look phased. If anything, her attitude gave off more amusement than anything else as she watched Mugen's next move. That being summoning lightning in the palm of his left hand, the sound of a thousand birds chirping at once filling the once quiet air.
While she was busy getting tazed like she was resisting arrest by Mugen, Vinaya's gaze managed to fall on Gynesis, who was walking his way over to the her. Fists and teeth clenched tightly, the exorcist was dead ahead of her, unlike the adventurer on her side. Who was about to stab her right in the chest.
'Going off of the probe I sent earlier, she's no spirit, and thus has a physical body. After all, had she been a spirit she wouldn't have even bothered reacting to Lightbulb, far less gotten affected by Crosses.' Were the blond's thoughts as he sent his hand for the intruder's heart. 'Which makes things doable for me. Things like this, even if it's risky...'
"Chidori!" Yelled Mugen as he plunged his hand forward, point blanking her with the technique of a thousand birds. Too bad he didn't have a running start before hand.
**CATCH!**
Despite being paralyzed, dropped to her knees, and not even looking in the right direction, Vinaya caught his offending limb with her free hand. Leaving the man's digits hovering dangerously close to her chest, with a few sparks dancing on her clothes thanks to the sheer proximity to her flesh.
"What?!" was written all over the man's face at what he saw. Instantly disabling his follow up attack upon getting his arm grabbed.
Mugen's only seen his binding skill known as Crosses bypassed by two means in his life. Those were: being vastly more physically powerful than him, curtesy Valori straight up tanking it and going on. Or immunity to electrical attacks through facing against Poltergeists alongside Gynesis a few times in the past.
'She's above a dragon emperor?!' Quickly raced through Mugen's mind as Vinaya locked eyes with him and opened her mouth to speak. Her tone one could consider teasing in nature.
"Trying to cop a feel hm? I feel like that's skipping a few steps, but if it's you I don't mind~" The amazonian casually stated between ragged breaths, averting her gaze on her last few words.
'What?' Mugen, not really too sure on how to interpret those words, decided he needed to tag out of the current confrontation. Suddenly, he'd found the wall to his left quite intriguing for some reason. Looking over just in time to see his purple-haired friend teleport away.
Finding himself in a desperate search for an out, the blond found himself saved by his ally appearing above both engaged fighters. With an outstretched hand already gunning straight for their shared opponent, eyes burning holes into her very soul.
"..." The exorcist said nothing as he silently went in for the surprise attack. 'You know how long I've been waiting for this?' The main thought running through his head as he arrived midair.
'While usually this is more of a last ditch effort than an opening attack, I really don't want to risk letting myself get carried away this late at night, the landlord might kick me out for noise.' Thought Gynesis as he came down with a glowing Ofuda in the palm of his hand, going to stamp the thing onto Vinaya's forehead. Like a . 'Dire Straights!'
As for the Lioness, she was still blushing, getting shocked, and looking off in the distance. A prime target if Mugen did say so himself, his smile growing just a bit as he felt the presence of his comrade appear right next to him.
'With both her hands full, and her legs busy kneeling, there's no way she can defend herself from this Evil sealing technique!' Thought the Urahara, eyes widening in surprise before he could even finish his surprise attack. 'Aw what the fuck...'
Even with all those debuffs stacked on her, Vinaya still managed to evade getting hit with Dire Straights. Or rather, she managed to lean back enough and in time to have the tag whiff its target. Unfortunately for said attacker, this resulted in the the sealing tag missing horribly. And a bit of Mugen's smile faltered at the sight. As well as the necklace wearer's hand planting firmly onto her chest.
'Damn, that's one of my last two Golden Ofudas. With a threat this big, anything less would just get dispelled on contact. Assuming it even got to her.' Calculated the exorcist as he watched his hand slip and land onto one of his adversary's breasts. 'I really should've restocked last week when I had the chance...'
On impact with her clothes and body, the Ofuda stuck on like glue, earning an annoyed tongue click from the user at his own folly in forgetting that his opponent outsped him. 'Oh, right, maybe if I approached her from behind it might've worked?'
Refusing to waste time on beating himself up over his critical error, Gynesis began thinking up a new plan. At the same time he reached his other hand out and grabbed Mugen with it. Getting encased in a golden light, the two men left nothing behind as they disappeared as fast as Gynesis appeared.
"Good going, senior exorcist, you really proved your experience on the field with that one," Mugen sighed as the two reappeared back at the couch they were lounging in not too long ago, reaching for his segmented sword as he sarcastically praised the 20 year old.
Grabbing a pair of handguns himself, the Ofuda user rolled his eyes before loading, cocking, and holstering both. 'Looks like she really did have us in some kind of pocket dimension. Luckily it wasn't too high tiered. Hopefully it wasn't one of those mimicry dimensions. I hate those.' Mused the purple-haired one, trying to shake the memories of getting tricked by one of the aforementioned dimensions out of his head.
"Yeah, yeah, turn right." Gynesis waved a hand dismissively as he gave a warning.
And like clockwork, Vinaya was right where Mugen was told to look. Walking in from what looked like the bathroom with quite the tantalizing sway in her hips. Already assuming a defensive position and sword in hand, the blond was in a much more prepared state than mere moments ago.
"Round 2, let's try not to suck ass this time, right?" Mugen chirped, sword pointing at the sin before him as he shot his ally a sly glare.
"Can you not?" Gynesis folded his arms, a motion that hid the twin uzis he'd summon in the same motion from the wall behind Vinaya. "For five seconds!" He added, stepping to stand side by side with Mugen, staring daggers at the woman before them.
The Lioness licked her lips, an action she couldn't stop herself from doing before cracking her knuckles and smirking at Mugen.
"Round 2? Boy the cutscene's just about to end~!" She proclaimed before dashing right at the duo.