At the ripe age of 25, Ray was no stranger to back pain. But today was a whole nother monster. He was on his way home from work when he felt his torso crack between a wheel and the cold, unfeeling asphalt. And before he knew it, his life was coming to an end, completely and utterly out of his control.
Ah, but at least the warmth pouring out of his body wasn't blood and pee. The metallic scent made it clear it was just blood- thankfully no piss. Of course, that didn't help his rather unfortunate case. He could tell by his bleary vision and diminishing heart rate that he was going to die either way. But he wanted to die with some dignity, damnit!
"..S..ser…iously…?"
His voice burned in his throat, the blood loss lending it a sickly rasp. Even the subtle vibration of his vocal chords proved to be too much. Frankly, Ray didn't know whether to laugh or cry at his predicament. After all, he still had a lot of things going for him, or he would like to go out thinking.
'Hah…'
But he couldn't help but scoff at that thought. Recounting his life for one last time, what did he accomplish?
He was a wage slave working for a no-name company, living a cycle of working, sleeping, and working some more. He ate out of the hands of his employers like the typical dog of upper management, the only thing separating him from a beggar being his next paycheck.
In the end, it was a life so unremarkable that even now, he had nothing to say. There were the generic things like family and friends, but those things had grown hazy with the passage of time. Speaking of which, when was the last time he had saw them? Did his friends even care about him? Yeah, no. Probably not. But it wasn't like those things mattered anymore.
"Ah, shit," a weaselly voice said. Ray heard the car door open as a figure stepped out of the vehicle. He then heard subsequent footsteps follow, each of varying qualities.
"What are we going to do now?" Another voice asked, a little tense, but otherwise more concerned about his own fate.
Several other voices chimed in with their own comments before devolving into childish bickering. They argued amongst themselves about the driver's idiocy, the possibility of going to jail, every legal consequence of potentially committing manslaughter, besides the fact that they might have just killed a man.
It was then that he realized he didn't just get hit by a bunch of idiots, but a bunch of idiot kids. Truly the cruelest joke.
Summoning the last remnants of his strength, Ray sputtered. "..F-Fu…"
"Holy shit! He's still alive?!"
"Fuck…"
"That'd be bad."
"....You….
Ray closed his eyes. He felt tired. The kids shouted, but their voices had grown too faint for him to discern. What were they saying? Well, it wasn't important anyway. Exhaustion crashed over his body, starting at his extremities, before travelling up his spinal cord. The moment it reached his brain, he felt…bliss. The sensation of blood, flesh, and bone quietly ceased, and all that was left was his consciousness.
He closed his eyes.
It was time to bid farewell.
What a wasteful life.
—-----------------
"Welcome, Ray."
Ray awoke and then saw…nothing. It was impossibly dark, steeping his vision in a void identical to sleep.
"Am I dead?"
"As dead as you can be-yes."
A figure emerged from the darkness. It looked vaguely humanoid, donning a navy blue suit ironed to creaseless perfection and two white gloves. A pair of eyes with scleras just a little too white stared back at him. Other than that, its body was basically featureless, blending into the surrounding void.
"I see." Ray took a pensive pause to process his current circumstances. "So is this the afterlife?
"Kind of," it answered. The mysterious figure's voice was, althought deep, bubbling over with excutement. Combined with its gaping eyes, it was a little unsettling, sending shivers up his spine had he not lost it not too long ago. " Tsk, tsk. Kids nowadays. They have no manners, wouldn't you agree? Running over a goo- ahem, poor man like you…" It rubbed its unmoving eyes, as if to wipe its nonexistent tears. Then, even more unnervingly, they crescented up in one smooth, almost buttery motion. "I almost cried, had you been less pathetic."
'...Are you just here to insult me?' Ray would roll his eyes if he could. Maybe he did. Maybe he did not. The lack of sensation made it impossible to tell.
"Ah, I'm sorry. I got off track." As if to divert the conversation, the mysterious voice let out an 'ahem' before continuing. "Pardon my lack of manners. My name is ⏹⏹⏹⏹⏹⏹"
But to its dismay, what should have been its name came out inexplicably garbled. "Just call me Joe."
"Alright, Joe."
"Well, like I said, you are dead. And to be blunt, let's just say the big man upstairs isn't too happy with you. After all…You're a piece of shit. A filthy sinner."
"Wha- so I'm going to hell? Are you the devil? What did I even do?"
"To answer your first question- Yep. Guaranteed eternal suffering, if you don't accept, that is. To answer your second question- not exactly. I'm just a functionary."
Ray paused to process what he had just learned. So God exists, and Satan probably exists too, meaning all those Jehovah's Witnesses were right. Was that why he was going to hell? He couldn't find anything in his life worthy of 'sin.' What even was sin?
'Was it just because I was a non-believer? Hah, are they proselytizing even in death?'
Even thinking about the implications of it was dizzying, but what was greater was a sense of frustration.
'How is that fair?'
First, he got mocked by a random entity about his predicament. Second, he was going to be sent to hell for an entirely arbitrary reason. That was not to say that he had particularly high expectations for his afterlife; if anything, he dreaded the idea of living beyond death, but being taunted by a literal and figurative Joe before his damnation didn't help.
But the entity didn't even give him a chance before it began to speak again.
"You know what you did, don't delude yourself," Joe said, as if pointing out the obvious. "But what's an afterlife without a chance to redeem yourself? To err is merely human, and to forgive, divine. Even prison systems- whoops- some prison systems give their prisoners a chance, and we aren't so cruel as to forsake growth; So I'll cut you a deal. You can expedite your damnation if you take it, but if you don't, then straight to hell it is.
Oh yeah, and should you give up on your end of the deal, we'll also send you straight to hell."
A wave of anxiety crept up on him, thinking about the implications. But the entity had begun to tap its fingers and...sing?- Regardless, it seemed bored. He didn't know how, but he could sense he was wasting time, a mutual feeling.
"It's a chance I'll take, Maybe I'll stay, Hell can wait--"
"Then can you tell me more about the deal?"
The entity's finger stopped, and a toothy frown formed on its formerly featureless face.
"Aw, Not an MJ fan, huh? Anyway, I'm glad you've made your choice...As expected," It said, turning its frown quite literally upside down. "But you took sooo long. I was dying of boredom. Not nearly as dead as you, though, heh."
'Snarky bastard.'
With a sassy snap, a holographic projection appeared before Ray. It displayed a kingdom from a bird's-eye view, with circular walls, a castle in its center, and a slightly curvy river passing through its entirety. It was an awfully familiar sight. Eerily similar, even.
"This is the kingdom of Caternia. Impressive, right? It is home to more than 7 million people, and now you're the one responsible for every one of their lives. No pressure."
'No pressure, my ass,' Ray thought inwardly. But more importantly, he had to confirm something. "Is this like those…Isekai?"
Ray had watched many anime as a youth, but he stopped having the time to after becoming a working member of society (more like a slave, actually). Instead, what little free time he had was allocated to eating, sleeping, and recovering from the day's shift, only to do it all again the next day.
As such, he couldn't help but feel a tinge of nostalgia looking at the screen before him. It reflected a time before adulthood, the good ol' days, however hazy they were now.
"Ah, you're a smart aleck, aren't ya? Yep. It's exactly as you imagine it. You'll be reborn into this world as its Hero to slay the Demon King and save humanity. Magic, swords- you get the gist. It's all as you see."
The entity's eyes shifted away from Ray, as if seeing something he couldn't. "Well, it seems like our time is up."
"Wa-"
Snapping its fingers one last time, a wave of lightheadedness overcame Ray.
The space around him began to twist, peeling back the black void, his consciousness tearing away. For a brief moment, everything went numb before the sensation of weight returned to him.
'Ouch!'
His ass hurt.
But he could see something now. Only blobs of yellow and slight movement, but it was something.
"H-Hero!"A young voice called out to him, followed by metallic ruffling.
Soon enough, his vision cleared, revealing rows of soldiers surrounding him and a girl dressed in white robes, kneeling in prayer. A light above bathed the scene in a golden glow.
"We greet the Hero!" they said in unison.
A holographic window appeared in front of him.
[
Ray Paradis (Level 15) (HP 20/20) (EXP 0/15)
Class: None
Stats:
Strength: 3
Endurance: 4
Dexterity: 3
Magic: 8
Luck: 0
Skills:
Hero's advantage (Passive lvl.1): Gain 500% exp for any task (excluding quests. What? Don't be greedy)
]
[You have a new Quest: What's a Hero that isn't informed?]
[
Quest: What's a Hero that isn't informed?
Ray Paradis, as the new savior of the over 7 million good citizens of Caternia, it is of utmost importance to be in the know.
Meet with the king (0/1)
Gain your first skill (0/1)
Defeat your first enemy (0/1)
Reward:
Caternia Likeability +1
EXP + 5
Punishment:
♫ 'Cause this is thriller, thriller night
And no one's gonna save you ♫ (Hell)
]
'Here we go.'
This was going to be simple...right?