"Here goes, attempt number one, drumroll please..." Ares was joking but Bellona, outside the cubicle, rapped her knuckles on the nearest wall and gave him a mini spotlight by doubling the light in front of the changing room. She even darkened everywhere nearby to set the mood but Ares didn't think it was worth it because he was only trying on a Hawaiian shirt and nothing fancy... Though, then again, now that he really thought about it he wasn't a proper dad if he didn't own a Hawaiian shirt so maybe he'd buy this anyway just to embarrass the rest of the family if ever they took a vacation to a sunny place. Rocking up to Akarala with this thing on would be funny even if only because of the second hand shame he would feel in every pore when Bellona tried to pretend she didn't know him. Anyway, Ares stepped out of the cubicle with a "ta da" and two upturned palms by his sides as if to ask 'whaddya think?' Be honest with me Bellona, give it to me straight, am I sexy or am I hot? Which is it? You don't have to hold back."
"Heh, you're an idiot, that's what you are. Still, gotta admit you rock a Hawaiian better than I thought you would. They work wonders on confident people and don't ever let anyone tell you there's no pride in your swagger." Bellona eyed up the bright and bold red shirt with white flowers on it and realised this was going ot be a pretty expensive haul because Ares was going to look at least decent in everything. He had a good body on him now thanks to the legendary fine grind he picked up, and the amplifier on top of that, so as long as the clothes fit, and they weren't clownish, it wouldn't look terrible really. He really did need this, though, as his current wardrobe was literally what he was wearing and that was borderline it. He did have some extra plain white shirts lying around, and a spare copy of his current clothes because he'd be damned if his comfort pick was ever inaccessible for whatever reason or got damaged, but beyond that the wardrobe in his room was barren. There were more cobwebs than clothes!... Actually,, that was a lie, there were no cobwebs because Ares was the spider exterminator of the century. There were no spiders in his home whatsoever as they would need to somehow trespass beyond his spider murdering disintegration barriers. Normal people could just walk in the front door but spiders? They had to do mission impossible just to get into the windows never mind all the hidden runes Ares had set up inside. So many spiders had been evaporated in the places Ares lived over the years...
Getting back on track, Ares was pretty pleased with the shirt but didn't feel the need to buy the shorts he was wearing. They went along well with the shirt but Ares already had enough shorts. He might buy a couple more but at that point he'd rather get something more interesting and / or made out of a different material to what he already owned. He had zero intention of buying leather shorts, for instance, but that would definitely be different comparatively and at least worth buying for the novelty and to have it there. Ares set aside the shirt for now and took the next outfit with him back into the room. About a minute later and he was back out again, this time in a comfy, creamy white sweater and some light blue-grey jeans. Something about this particular outfit bothered Ares, he felt like a prick wearing it. If he threw on his shades too he would look like some millionaire preppy who shows off his wealth at every available turn by rolling up in a loud car to every single venue. He had the Elliot too and while that wasn't a fancy vehicle or anything having any kind of vehicle whatsoever did make him stand out from most other people in Sheryashka. He'd look mighty punch-able. Even for someone like him, who enjoyed messing with other people, and didn't take any specific measure to hide his arrogance, this set of clothing was way too much. It's not that it looked bad on him or anything, the clothes themselves, this colour and combination, were utterly cursed. Just wearing it for twenty odd seconds made Ares feel overcome with the urge to take a phone call as loudly as possible in public, bonus points if he did so in a foreign language. Or, well, phones were basically non-existent here. so he'd have to use a talisman, but the point remained. Also, apparently Bellona agreed with him because her only response to all this was to laugh uncontrollably and keep trying to reign herself in by putting her hand over her mouth and looking away from Ares. This outfit was a bust. Though sweaters themselves were fine so Ares bought a couple... Not cream coloured, that is, and not black either as that had the same issue which was double true if it was a turtle neck. This shop had some truly horrifying items for sale... If Ares wasn't careful he would walk out of this place looking like a CEO or an asshole with no in between! Maybe even both...
Next! A vest... Ares' masculinity was on the line here, one slight misstep in the ensemble and hew as going to look mighty gay here. Bellona jokingly encouraged him to wear a scarf over the vest but Ares outright refused. He was sticking to plain blue jeans and a plain white vest on this one and didn't have the balls to be adventurous because he saw that only ever ending one way. He had a decent enough physique now that a vest looked good on him and it was decently comfortable too. He could wear this vest when he was training in the back garden or sparring as it was incredibly easy to move his arms around freely in. If the weather was hot he could also just throw this on if he needed to go out quickly for whatever reason so it was good to have at least one of these lying around... The only issue was Enyo. She'd seriously jump him the second she saw him wearing this. Exposed flesh? Enyo wasn't having it, there were repercussions to such a careless display of man meat. If Ares threw on a hardhat and grabbed a pick Enyo could maybe tick off a fetish or two off her list but that was a problem for future Ares. Right now he was heading back into the changing room while holding onto a pink polo shirt and some white trousers. This one sort of had the same issue as the last, the levels of camp could be off the chart if not handled appropriately, but this one was more so a matter of confidence than any additional pieces adding to the mess and sending it overboard. Ares felt like going golfing wearing this but otherwise it was perfectly fine. Luckily his rings would also help differentiate which was he was 'oriented'. Normally he wouldn't mind but, a long while back, before he left for Xasca, as he was idling about in town, he came across a strange guy being evasive near a back alley. Ares, ever the protector of his town, asked him what was up and the guy was apparently sparring for money. Curious, Ares probed further only to learn he was a dual cultivator! Ares wanted no part in this guy's sparring! Good for him, but calling out to Ares made him wonder if he was doing anything to look... 'Exceptionally fabulous', as the man put it. Ares was hardly fashion conscious but if he could avoid giving the wrong impression, and wind up getting catcalled by back alley men, he would appreciate the fruits of his own effort.
The polo was accepted into the pile of successes and so Ares was back n the changing room once again. It was getting a bit stuffy in here but Ares had the foresight to borrow Aejaz' Black Ice Acrimony and was using the Cold Caller rune to keep himself fresh. Ares threw away his Black Ice Bane but Aejaz had no reason to get rid of his weapon as it still served some utility purposes even though it wasn't as sharp as it used to be. The fog and mirage were excellent for him still and the Cold Caller rune was just always nice to have around. Ares had his own means to keep his temperature from sky rocketing now but they were mostly all clothes based and he was trying on other clothes right now so this was his best bet. If Aejaz needed daggers for Hans' missions he was allowed to borrow the Nyxian Prowler, right now Ares needed the Acrimony! Also, speaking of Black Ice, Ares didn't know this, because he didn't bother checking, but somebody had already gotten their hands on the Bane! It was a very recent acquisition, and a plucky, intrepid adventurer got their hands on it fair and square after many tribulations, but Ares wouldn't meet this young cultivator for a while to come yet so it didn't much matter. At the current moment in time Ares was being put through the paces in his own trial...
"No but really, why does this shop even have butler outfits?!" Not a tuxedo, which they also had, nor a suit, which they also had, but a butler's outfit. That was what Bellona picked for Ares. This wasn't because she thought he looked good in it, though he did, it was actually a gift for her sister who would fawn and drool if she caught Ares wearing this. She'd negotiate to get him wearing this and serving her obediently for a day and that would get her in a good mood without a shadow of a doubt. Never say Bellona never did anything for her sister... Although, really, the more she looked, the more Bellona wouldn't mind the same treatment. The reason was different, bossing Ares around for a day sounded like fun, but the end result of Ares becoming subservient for a while remained true and he knew his fate was set in stone the moment he put this outfit on. He knew what he was getting into before he slipped into it but, hey, if one or two of these outfits were for his wives' pleasure and not his then that was fine too...
Ares went back into his little box and, this time, he wasn't feeling so good about the next outfit he was putting. Bellona liked the bad boy look but was aware that the traditional version, leather jacket, ripped jeans, etc, was... To put it lightly, not it. It was passable in movies, the kind she liked watching many years ago, and was ok in some highly specific modelled photographs, but otherwise? It typically wasn't great. Bellona preferred a different kind of look, and that was waiting for Ares further down the line, but right now she was putting the discussion to rest and making Ares try the 'greaser' look for her own peace of mind. She wanted absolute confirmation it looked silly and, to the surprise of nobody, it really didn't look great in person when Ares begrudgingly exited the room. It wasn't hideous, nobody was going to stare at him for being unusual, but it wasn't anywhere near as cool as it was portrayed in films, that was for sure. Ares looked passable at best and it was easily the worst outfit in terms of style yet. At least with the cream jumper Ares just looked annoying, with this it felt like amateur hour. Ares didn't own a bike, though he did kinda want one after seeing Deimos' in action back at the international, so he was basically a poser in this thing. He didn't smoke either, nor did he sit around on ledges and brood with one leg bent and his shoulder leaning on it. This look was maybe tolerable if the person wearing it exemplified the biker stereotype to a tee but even then 'bad boy' aspect of it was sorely lacking.
This one was a dud and would have to be shelved forever. Bellona knew this going into it but having part of her nostalgia go up in flames like this was a tad disappointing. Oh well, she still had the ace up her sleeve and that would definitely work! Before that, though, Ares had a few last outfits to try on first. There were a whole range of them but the only ones that really stood out were a waistcoat and rolled up sleeve style, a suspenders and shirt banker style, and, surprisingly, a male college professor sort of style with warm browns that was calm and soothing. If Ares shut his mouth and didn't act like his usual self that last one really popped though Bellona was pretty certain this style worked for most men if they acted the part. Still, it looked good on him and some Windsor glasses, small and round with dull gold rims, made him look drastically different from the usual Ares. This one could enable Ares to settle down and teach somewhere remote and nobody would be any wiser it was him under there. Actually, Ares was considering going undercover in Neo Gear with this outfit in the back of his mind. A lot of the strife going on over there was happening under the watchful eyes of people wouldn't much appreciate interference from outsiders. Becoming a temporary professor at Roboworks academy instead of openly heading over as the renowned Ares might actually not be a bad idea. As long as Ares touched up his appearance a bit it would be hard to recognise him. All he needed to do then was send himself over as an aid representative instead of baring though the front door and he'd be able to move around without as much scrutiny form important people in the region. At least worth considering, that was what Ares reckoned about this approach. Still, Neo Gear wasn't an immediate concern, he was still heading to Akarala first at bare minimum and he'd heard from Enyo there was some kind of discontent brewing over in Dwarvingdom that he might have to go check out. Ares could feel it in his gut that Neo Gear was going to be another big expedition, it was where the Torchbearer resided too, so he'd much rather get everything else in the domain over and done with before he got entangled in all the various messes happening over on that side o the planet.
Ares put the full fake teacher ensemble off to the side in the 'buy' pile because he was going to be wearing it even if looked poor on him. It didn't but he was committed to the idea of infiltration now and nothing was going to stop him! Was he doing it because it was a good idea? Yeah, sure,. but to be honest, he also thought it would be funny. Teacher Ares! Every student's worst nightmare! He was already coming up with fake homework pranks and pop quizzes just to mess with people and he wasn't even there yet! He'd have to take the job seriously, though, and actually help young cultivators learn how to follow the path and take their own journey without getting murdered. Ares was the strongest cultivator in Sheryashka, though, so it's not like he was bereft of experience or advice. If anything he would struggle to help with anything cultivation related as he barely cultivated himself. Really he should get some practice in before heading over although he could apply to be primarily a combat instructor. That or a professor who worked with the 'initiated'. There wasn't really a term for it, at least not official anyway as the students themselves had come up with plenty, but there were two branches in the academy depending on the class of the student attending.
Neo Gear was rife with upgrades for robos, and its inhabitants were all fairly powerful as a result, but it remained true that those stricken with poverty would struggle in such a society. Can't buy upgrades and resources? Can't cultivate or get stronger. That was harsh but true but the academy sought to try and provide a hand to those in need by creating another method of entry to the academy. Usually anyone could pay to get in but for those who the prices were too steep for they could get in through an examination, sort of like the trial Ares went through upon joining Heaven's Path. Those who bought their way in typically had more experience with resources and cultivation, so needed a more combat-oriented type of instruction as they had the knowledge and know-how but not the experience. Those who fought their way in had the combat experience but the cultivation know how. Sometimes classes overlapped, and sermons from expert cultivators could be attended by anyone interested, but they were split up for the most part to focus on their respective shortcomings. Truly dedicated students could show up to everything if they had the time and willpower though that was rare. There were also more traditional sects in Neo Gear but they all paled in comparison in terms of size and available resources so Roboworks remained a powerhouse. Plus the two warring political factions had a sort of noblesse oblige, a compelled obligation to fund the academy for multiple reasons. If one side backed out, student intake would favour the side that didn't. A generation of Roboworks taught gear folk and no neo droids, or the reverse, would be disastrous for potential combat strength so militarily it wasn't an option. Not openly supporting the education of the young, be it the children of nobility or the children of the everyday citizens, was bad for optics so that was problematic. And the people who ran the academy had their own political strength that warranted caution so in terms of allyship and networking it was a terrible idea to form any kind of grudge. Backing could not be rescinded without immense cost so both sides were sort of locked into frequent donations, budgetary favouritism, and bribes here and there.
Long story short, Neo Gear was all over the place. It was hard to keep track but as long as one remembered that the two sides hated each other you would generally be able to figure why the country was the way it was with regard to anything within it. Everything was either a competition or mandatory co-operation, never anything in between. Ares was probably going to be pestered into 'picking a side' as it wasn't uncommon for new teachers at the academy to be scouted in ways that were above board and, well, not exactly legal. Part of the reason the academy lacked new teachers was because of the inability to exist without joining one of the two political factions vying for supremacy within its walls. The last professor who tried remaining neutral and just doing their job was found beaten up, and partially disassembled, in a back alley dumpster. Was it the students who did or it the teachers? Nobody knows, the professor up and ran and never looked back. Anywho, Ares wading into that oily muck and finding and navigating his own path through political rivalry was a problem for another day, right now he was still trying on clothes! Though, actually, he was finally on the last outfit!
Hallelujah!
And it was a simpler one than he was expecting it to be. He knew of Bellona's 'bad boy' fondness but it seemed she was willing to forgo some of that energy to just put Ares in something more casual. Something more akin to what she wore. A black hoodie made of breathable fabric, a white shirt underneath, and some black joggers. The hoodie and the joggers had white-line streaks but, other than that, there really wasn't anything too special about it. Plain but it was a cross between Bellona's own casual style and the look she wanted Ares to embody. Did he look like a superstar model after putting it on? No, hardly not, but he looked exactly as Bellona wanted him to. Though she didn't say much she seemed particularly happy and was keen to make him stay dressed like that for the remainder of their date. Ares wasn't allowed to take it off but that was fine as he felt right at home in these clothes. They were easy to wear and, though they weren't much suitable for combat, they were great for walking around in. he could even hide his Zephyr under the hoodie if need be but this was a normal date in a safe place so he simply took it off for now. He paid for everything, shoved it all inside his Primordial Blade, and left the store with Bellona dragging him across the street. The look was good but there was something missing, something that would really piece together Bellona's perfect image in her head. A haircut! Or, well, it was a little more than that but Ares didn't know what he was in store for and Bellona refused to tell him. He was going to have just accept whatever was done to him and pray she wasn't going to make him bald as a mean joke. She was taking today seriously, though, so the chances were low... Low but not zero... Ares entered the shop and, as Bellona whispered to the hairdresser who was going to be responsible for his fate, crossed his fingers.