The entrance exam was only a week out and I was already pretty sure I had it in the bag. I already roughly knew what was expected of applicants because Moe couldn't stop raving about the 'killer robots' she fought when she went to take the test herself four years ago.
The way she actually described the exam made me realize they were probably weaker than your average arasaka Minotaur, not a problem at all then for me. Don't get me wrong my little big sis is very strong for a person. Her punching and burning through the metal plating is pretty awesome.
I'm a walking cyborg arsenal though, so anything her nearly supernatural strength could output my gorilla arms probably have triple the impact.
Sure the written test would be hell because it covers all the classic school classes plus the law system that surronds heroes, quirks, and the like, but worst comes to worst I just use my kiroshis to zoom in on someone else's paper and cheat my ass off. All the basic shit like the math and science shit I could just pull from my old school days.
The fuck does a merc look like studying laws? I don't even heed them. The most important one is that unless authorized, quirk use in a public space is a no no and that's about as much as I bothered reading.
I mean, I will heed them for right now so I don't fuck with my record right before the exam but my point still stands; studying is boring as shit!
I felt like doing some exploring, especially now that I beat that old bat finally. Yeah it was a little dirty luring her into eating a flash bang point blank but ya gotta do what ya gotta do y'know. I didn't know how else to put her down without doing lethal damage. Most cyberware isn't exactly design with capture as the first option, especially not against anyone so slippery.
Seriously, my internal soft clocked her velocity when I leapt over her at fucking Mach 3. If I hadn't pre jumped because I was expecting It I wouldn't be surprised if both of my knees were obliterated.
What a metal old lady. Way worse than Dorio but the same vibe when it came to training. As long as you aren't dead and the damage isn't lasting… no holds barred.
She was usually a woman of few words but her parting ones for my outing today? 'Head on a swivel, 24/7.'
Honestly, I get that technically I'm her 17 year old adoptive son but she should know me well enough by now. I'm not exactly new to violence and I'm pretty sure I could be a spec ops agent with how perceptive I am.
I could turn on thermal vision and see through walls for Christ sake. Kinda hard to get the jump on… what the fuck is that?
It looked from afar like a boulder of fat wrapped in yellow latex, and with a zoom in I was practically on the money, minus the big loony toon grin and multiple meat skewers in hand. A big yellow hoodiewas draped over him, the letters FG sat there proudly, a black mask over the top of his face with his cartoonish eyes peeking out. The rest of the outfit was similarly tacky, weird white orange knee braces with spokes on em and obnoxiously bright orange and red combat boots.
People parted for him and fans trailed him as he walked, casually taking pictures with passerby's and munching on his snacks. Definitely a hero. I have no clue how when he's shaped like a mobile bean bag, but y'know no judging books by covers and all.
His steps were purposeful and he cleared ground while surveying from the looks of it. Wow this guys rotund.
Plus it probably has something to do with his quirk, no way does anybody have those proportions naturally. Especially with how unhindered he was seeing as he's now looking me dead in the face.
The hero who looked more like an inflatable was staring directly at me when his smile dropped for a second. And then he kept staring, so obviously, I stared right back as he kept walking my way, I wasn't gonna let this big bastard bitch me on my first outing to the city by myself in this world.
"That's one serious scowl, you sizing me up or something kid?" And by the time my brain caught up to my pride I remembered the guy was a hero and I'm trying to enter a hero school in ten days. Wouldn't look great on my record to have punched one of my future peers in the face.
I stammered, trying to plead my case; I wanted no trouble right now right before the exam and especially on my first trip out alone, the Matron would probably put me on house arrest till further notice, hell she might just say fuck the exam and try and lock me away. I would be ultra fucked!
Before I could though his smile returned with a chuckle, "Bah, just messing with you, why the scary stare though big man?" He motioned a skewer my way and I absentmindedly grabbed it.
"You looked like you had something on your mind."
"Just never seen a guy so… uh, tall, before." Yeah, let's go with tall, "Threw me off having to crane my neck up to anyone. Much less a human whoopie cushion."
I forget sometimes I wasn't a bean sprout anymore now that I grew up with actual nutrition, I stood at a solid 6 foot 1 and had solid muscle. I wasn't exactly a brick house like Maine but I certainly wasn't little. And still this guy stood a good three heads taller than me and twice as wide.
I took a bite as he deadpanned, examining me, then his grin returned as he scoffed in disbelief. I guess heroes aren't exactly used to getting insulted by civilians so casually. Well insult was a stretch, he asked a question and I answered honestly.
He held a thumb to his chest and spoke with genuine conviction. "Well for your information, this here whoopie cushion is a top fifty pro hero! This back is big so I can do my job better, protecting people!"
Now a part of me wanted to cackle at the prospect of there being thousands of hero's in the country ranked lower than this guy, and another had to have a little respect settle in. The dude was fat and jolly but dead serious about his sense of duty, I fuck with that.
" Ok ballon dude-"
" The names Fat Gum actually." He pointed at the large FG on his chest. Who cares man? I sure as hell don't.
" That's barely better then what I said, anyway, where'd you get these skewers. I see why you grabbed a dozen of em, these things are damn delicious!" I quickly equipped a kerenzikov as I spoke, the world slowing to a crawl, as I effortlessly plucked another two skewers from his grip before he could react.
By the time the device clocked out I had already tore through the first row of grilled meat and vegetables and was halfway through the second, holy shit man, this is what actual street food is like here? It's fucking incredible compared to the santo street slop I was used to.
" HEY MY CALORIES!" He tried and failed to snatch back the remains of my loot before it disappeared into my stomach and the wooden skewers I darted into a trash bin like knives.
Damn I love this quirk shit, even the tiny things like the ligament and tendon enhancements are so convenient to equip and dismiss.
A hand the size of my head plopped onto my shoulder, my normal flesh and blood legs nearly buckled as the exasperated giant bellowed, "THATS NOT RIGHT MAN I ALREADY GAVE YOU ONE! ITS JUST NOT RIGHT TO TAKE A GUYS GRUB, I ALREADY SHARED!"
It took all of my facial muscles working together to keep from cackling, but I kept my face neutral as I responded naturally, " I thought you were sharing; what's one or two more?" Now I was snickering like a hyena, couldn't help it, have you ever seen an angry hot air balloon before? This shit is comical.
"SHARING IS CONSENSUAL, THAT WAS SNATCHING YOU LITTLE-" I cut him off, the bit was funny but way too many people were looking now and I didn't want word to get back to the matron of me harassing a pro hero in the street.
"I'll catch you later." My sandy had been equipped the second his hand touched my shoulder, always have an evac and all that. I activated it and the ballon guys rant was cut short as the world slowed to snail speeds. I simply stepped out of his grasp and started jogging away.
I toggled my optical camo as a just in case and turned to leave, but… ah fuck it fine, I'll replace the guys skewers. Consider it payment for the entertainment and his time. If I push it I can get back before he realized I even moved.
I darted through the crowded roads, the people like statues barely moving at all until I reached the shishkabob stand. The cook was still practically frozen, reaching out to hand a customer a handful of five freshly cooked skewers, the smell was intoxicating.
"Yoink~"
And with a flash of my hand all five were plucked from the clerk stuck in slo mo. There, mission complete, now I just gotta get em back and disappear until the entrance exams. I'm definitely keeping three of these though, the first one he did share after all.
On my way back I took in the views, a city sure but kinda… lackluster in its grandeur like NC was. On the other end of the spectrum it was just like it in another way.
Homeless were scattered between alleys, their heat sigs were almost all misshapen, a lot seemed damn near inhuman looking through the thermal view. The other few scattered about were the same type of scrawny, starving sort you would find in every crack and crevice of NC. Just, kinda depressing honestly that this was the most I've been reminded of home since I've been here.
It seemed like every where I go there's no in between, you're either born to be a winner or you lose at the starting line. Or you trip and face plant halfway through; semantics or whatever. Regardless, as indifferent as I usually am to seeing things that don't involve me, however tragic, it still fucked with my view on this country a bit more.
The benches with barred arm rests dividing the seats to stop people lying down. The corners and ledges of cover, I could glimpse that the vagrants I was used to would most likely occupy had spikes or bumps of concrete along it.
I continued the rest of my jog mulling over the possibilities of homeless mutants or those scrawny few who either were so weak they could keel over or huddled to walls like they were spooked their own shadow. All stuck in places that obviously don't want them. Maybe 40x zoom on thermal vision eyeballs wasn't the smartest. I'm seeing more then I meant too, but at the same time…
How many of these people stuck suffering in the cracks just snap or drop dead one day because they can't take it anymore. Either as a villain on a rampage or a quiet suicide they'll end up a footnote in the news somehow.
I couldn't imagine it, being born with a power that makes others either see you as inhuman or a danger. Just by chance at four you could turn into some lizard dude and you would just have to live with that for the rest of your life.
Even in comic book land there's still the gutter that people fall into I guess.
He can keep the skewers. I think my appetite is shot.
I upped the pace, a slight sweat sheen on my forehead as I reappeared in the big guys grasp just before his hand had closed too much to to slip two of the skewers into.
The deep teal shade of the sandy faded as I returned, skewers in hand and mind in turmoil.
"-PORCUPINE GIMME BACK MY MEAT DAMNI- Huh?" The big man, now in real time, finally realized his grip on a human now held wooden sticks lined with smokey goodness.
" A teleport quirk or something ? Aren't those supposed to be like stupid rare? Who the- no wrong question. Should I report it is the real one?" I was still standing a few feet away under my camo listening in.
"Bah who cares, I got my calories back, I'll think about it later, gotta get back to work." And the jolly fat man went back to walking his patrol and munching on his snacks.
"Plus, what kinda bad guy replaces the food he stole? Just a rude little bastard is all. "
I tripped him and began sprinting home as the massive man ate asphalt and looked around as if struck by a ghost. See this is why I kept the other three skewers hidden in my jacket. Talk shit, eat shit. Simple as that.
I should've installed a camo last time I love this thing.