Jean looked at the words in silence for a long time. Peter began to worry she might suddenly explode. Fortunately, she merely put the paper away, without commenting or breaking down.
"Maybe I should have realized it earlier," Jean said, "Ever since I felt the Phoenix Force within me, I thought I would never have a peaceful life again. But thinking carefully now, I've had many moments of true tranquility. It wasn't when I was alone, doing nothing, or seeking comfort from someone. It was when I helped those lost young mutants, soothed their emotions, or rescued them from discrimination, even if it was just teaching them to spell words..."
"Scott is a good man, almost too good," Jean said, "He always silently protects, solves problems alone, tolerates others, helps others. When I receive his help, I feel warmth and safety, which is the simplest way for me. Because to comfort children, I need enough patience and have to carefully sense their emotions; to fight discrimination, I need to rack my brains to refute those people's words; even to teach spelling, I have to look at grammar books first. With a simpler method, I gave up on all of that."
"But it not only became a burden for Scott, it also never truly gave me peace. The promises and assurances Scott gave me, I couldn't believe them myself. Because deep down, I knew very well, he could never defeat the Phoenix, he couldn't pull me back when I lost control. So even if he promised seriously, I tried to deceive myself into believing, but I couldn't fool myself."
"I should have realized earlier: the only one who can suppress and control the Phoenix is myself. I should become someone who perfectly controls the Phoenix Force, then uses that power to save others. Only when I've transformed my past flaws into strengths, and used this so-called destructive power to genuinely help others, can I find ultimate peace."
"No, Jean, don't burden yourself so much." Professor X said, "You have no obligation to save anyone."
"It's not just about saving others, it's about saving myself," Jean told Professor X, "If I can't do it, I'll never be able to relax, always living in fear, always burdening good people like Scott who are willing to tolerate me, including you, Professor."
Professor X shook his head and said, "Please believe me, the goal I've fought for my whole life is to be able to proudly tell you 'it's not necessary' when you say 'I must be strong,' then smile and tell you: those so-called 'burdens,' the storms that pour down in your life, are merely insignificant droplets within the countless tidal waves I've experienced in my life."
Upon hearing Professor X's words at that moment, Peter found himself deeply shaken in ways hard to describe. He even began to somewhat understand those who believe in God—in the short span of a human life, all those moments when the heart beats with emotion might be spent searching for such a 'Father.' It could be God, it could be Charles Xavier, there's no difference.
Professor X has battled Magneto for over half a century, perhaps still not completely changing the status of mutants, but now when mutants worldwide are wronged, they will remember: at least we have two 'Gods.'
"No matter what, I've realized now," Jean took a deep breath and said, "Continuing like this is not an option, I must change."
"Alright, ma'am, I completely agree with your thoughts," Peter nodded and said, "But let's focus back on this case first. I heard from Katy that you argued before due to work, can you tell us the details?"
Jean paused but didn't seem depressed. She said, "I might have been confused before, but now I completely understand. Scott might just not want me to leave—because of something the electronic life said, it said 'I will understand sooner or later.'"
"You mean…this is Scott's selfishness?"
"Maybe. Because at that time, the job I found was helping in a welfare home. Although the salary wasn't much, there were some subsidies. Back then I aimed for the money, but Scott might have thought, because of what the electronic life said, that the job might help me realize: only by helping and saving others can I achieve true peace. He might've thought I would give up seeking comfort from him, so he disagreed, trying to persuade me to change jobs. But at that time, I shallowly understood it as: he thought I would lose control and hurt the children in the welfare home."
Jean lowered her head slightly sadly and said, "When I angrily pointed this out, his expression was indeed strange, looking very hurt. This might also be one of the reasons he later lost control, because I completely misunderstood him. He was merely trying to keep me, wanting to continue to tolerate me, but I thought he was discriminating against me."
"Alright, I understand. It seems we've found the root cause and trigger for the loss of control," Peter stroked his chin and said, "But I'm still a bit unclear on the motive of this guy. It said those words very correctly, in a way, it also enlightened you, but why would it do that?"
"I know it might be wrong to say this, but…it really did make me figure things out," Jean bit her lip and said, "You might not believe it but since I realized this, the Phoenix has been exceptionally calm."
Finishing her words, she extended one hand, a flame ignited at her fingertip. Professor X immediately became tense, and Peter felt a sense of danger, despite not having Spider-sense, but the destructive aura that accompanied the Phoenix Force was almost visible to the naked eye, no superpower was needed to feel it.
The next second, with a "bang," the door was flung open. Logan burst in, standing dumbfounded seeing the three people inside the room perfectly fine.
"Uh, sorry, I may have been a bit disoriented. I seemed to sense the Phoenix's power…has the Phoenix not lost control?"
Jean was a bit speechless, turning to look at the door that had been clawed, smashed, and sighed deeply.
Logan is a good person, just a bit straightforward and impetuous. She just thought of this when Logan came up to carefully examine her, then sighed with relief, shoulders relaxed, saying: "Good thing you're alright. Now that Magneto is not here, I was really worried something would happen to you."
"Okay, it's not entirely your fault for not understanding, ma'am," Peter walked over and looked at Jean, "The people around you always excel at accommodating you, giving you so much care and love—kind, brave, and unhesitatingly. You are like a spoiled child, relying on yourself, it is indeed very difficult to awaken."
This remark is actually a bit harsh. Peter saw Logan glaring at him, with a look that seemed to say, "Even though it's true, you shouldn't just say it out loud."
Jean shook her head helplessly and said, "If you really catch that unfortunate fellow, you must leave me a chance to thank it in person. If it weren't for it, I wouldn't have had the chance to figure things out."
"Wait," Peter suddenly had a flash of inspiration, and said, "could it be... this is the purpose of the electronic life?"
"What?"
"It just wants to enlighten you."
"Huh?"
Not only Jean, but the other two couldn't understand either. Professor X looked at Peter and said, "You mean it stirred up Jean and Scott's relationship to make Jean awaken into a perfect master of the Phoenix Force, a superpower even surpassing Omega-Level Mutants? It mustn't be a network-controlling mutant, right?"
This guess scared Professor X himself into a sweat. If that's true, and Magneto had caught the other party, there would be trouble. Because if it were all arranged by a mutant, they'd end up losing everything.
Peter shook his head and said, "That's unlikely. If it really were a mutant and cared so much for mutants, it could reverse Earth's public opinion overnight. Modern people so reliant on the internet can easily be brainwashed by online content. If it orchestrates a terrorist attack, it shows it has no morals, so why not use a simpler method?"
"But if it's not for the mutants, but for personal desires, it doesn't make sense," Logan shook his head, "it can monitor us via the internet, and knows what kind of person Jean is. Even if it helped Jean, the methods are too extreme, Jean wouldn't help it just because of that—wouldn't it be all for nothing?"
"Perhaps it doesn't need Jean to help it," Peter pondered aloud, "what if it just wants to pursue Jean?"
Jean pointed to herself: "Pursue who? Me?"
"Exactly, don't think of this as too complicated. If you like a girl who has a boyfriend and you happen to have no moral restraints, you'd definitely find a way to break them up, just to get the girl yourself."
"No, that's still not right," Professor X pointed out, "there are many ways to break them up without using this one. Because this would make Jean too occupied to pursue any relationship for some time. The Phoenix isn't easy to control, even if it's emotionally linked, it requires spiritual power training. Suppressing Phoenix completely in the Psychic Battlefield would take months, maybe even years if not going well. No matter how strong electronic life is, it can't invade a Psychic Battlefield with Phoenix present, let alone pursue anyone. That's just shooting itself in the foot."
"This indeed seems suspicious," Peter frowned and said, "logically, someone with a love-obsessed mentality would want their pursuit target to also be love-obsessed, making them easier to win over. No one wants to force their object of affection into an independent, strong woman."
While Peter was pondering aloud, Jean and Logan's gazes naturally drifted to Professor X.
"Really, only a madman would do that," Jean said, with implication.
"Definitely a violent maniac," Logan nodded, "the type that can paralyze someone just by blocking a bullet."
"Enough guessing," Professor X interrupted them and said, "once Erik captures it, it can be questioned. You all head out."
Jean and Logan both rolled their eyes and exited one after the other. Peter didn't initially understand the cryptic conversation between them, but when he turned back and saw Professor X's blue eyes, he suddenly understood, shrugged, and left as well.
Just as they stepped out, they heard fighting noises from the west-side building. Peter rushed to the window and saw it was the building holding Cyclops. Meanwhile, Jean and Logan, more familiar with the base layout, had already dashed downstairs.
"Magneto is taking action! Let's get over there quickly!"
Peter raced towards the stairs, but just like that day, a gust flipped him over. As he climbed back up near the stairs, he heard Professor X's voice echo in his ear:
"We've captured it. Congregate at the conference hall."