The funeral wasn't a small one. The church was filled with people from the community. The mother and Aria sat in the front row while the father stood in front of all the people, speaking about his son and accomplishments he had achieved in his young life. Small sobs could be heard from the mother as silent tears ran down her cheeks. The father's expression was a little more complex. Guilt? Sadness? The young girl couldn't tell.
Aria was completely silent as her father spoke. Even when they were entering the church, many had eyes on her, perplexed by her apathy. Her movement was robotic, and she only spoke in one-word sentences. The people really thought that she didn't feel anything for her brother. But they knew nothing. One look into the girl's eyes, and all the grief she felt would be seen.
All but one man outside her family knew her true feelings. And it was the man who broke the news to her parents. Bishop Sebastian. His dark slick back hair and black shades clipped to his nose usually intimidated others, but Aria found warmth and comfort in his seemingly cold demeanor. He gently held her hand as her father spoke.
When it was time to say their goodbyes, Aria froze up unsure of what she would see. Her last memory of her brother was him smiling at her and saying they would play with each other another time. His caring hand was ruffling her head. His blond hair shining like any other star should. She didn't want to taint that memory with his corpse.
But she did want to say goodbye. She won't get another chance. What if she regrets it for the rest of her life?
Then, the bishop's hands tightened around her's. She looked up at him and he gave her a comforting smile. The warmth she felt from him contrasted with the dark clothes he wore, different from the usual white, gold and blue uniform.
"I'll go with you," he said.
Together, they walked to the casket. She trembled as she looked into it. His blond hair had been neatly combed, and he was wearing his favorite blue and black suit.
He never spoke about it, but there always was something he was hiding from her. Something that was crushing him inside. Aria did her best to relieve that. She cooked for him. Helped with his laundry. Even trying to help with his schoolwork, though to no avail. But it never seemed to bring him any comfort. He always looked tired and worn down.
Yet now looking upon her brother's body, he seemed so at peace. So relaxed. He actually looked his age. Younger even. And a small smile tugged on his lips. One more genuine than Aria had ever seen.
Her eyes began to water, and sorrowful wails rang around the church. Because in that moment she realized that despite everything, nothing she did improved her brother's life. Death's merciful hand was the only thing that could relieve him.
"It's my fault… I didn't help him. I wasn't a good sister."
As they lowered his casket in the eternal bed, Aria found herself praying. She didn't know why. After all, she didn't believe in higher power. But if there was anything that could bring her brother back, it would be that higher power.
So, she begged. Pleaded. Made offers of sacrifice, even offering herself.
No answer was given. Not even a sign of acknowledgement.
~
Aria didn't want to leave. Even as her parents insisted, she wanted to stay with her brother.
"What if he gets lonely?" she pleaded. "H-he needs me! I need… to be with him!"
Her mother couldn't bear her sobs and walked away to try and collect herself. The father didn't bother with words. He picked her up and carried her home as she cried.
Their once vibrant home became a shell of what it used to be. Aria's father went about his day as he usually would. But there was a notable lack of enthusiasm in each of his steps now.
The mother seemed to be doing better but Aria sometimes caught her staring outside into the streets. The girl wondered what fond memories of her brother she was thinking. Was it one she was in? Maybe one from before she was born? Whichever it was, it always left a sad smile on her face.
It had now been a month since her brother's passing. Aria was now with her parents in church, and she couldn't be bothered with the sermon. She always wondered why her parents insisted on going to church despite not believing.
"There are still things anyone could learn even if they don't believe," her mother once said.
But she always found that explanation unconvincing. What things was she referring to? She never specified what. But it's not like she could just say no to them. So, for now she'll sit quietly in her seat and pretend to be interested.
Her brother used to try and entertain her the best he could without disturbing others. Never failed to make her laugh at some point. The memories made the emptiness in her soul deepen and tears threatened to fall.
"Mama... can I go… to the bathroom?"
The mother took one look at the girl and said she could. She asked to escort the girl, but Aria said she would be fine.
She made her way to the children's bathroom and when she entered, she could no longer hold back the tears, and they freely fell from her eyes.
She was in there for about five minutes before the door suddenly opened. She quickly tried to wipe her stinging red eyes before the person saw but soon, they spoke out.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb."
The voice was feminine. A girl not much older than her.
"Hey, are you okay? Why are you crying?"
Aria glanced up at the girl who had entered. She looked older—maybe twelve or so—and to Aria she seemed impossibly tall, the way older kids always did. Her hair was the darkest Aria had ever seen, darker even than Bishop Sebastian's, and her eyes were a deep crimson that caught the light strangely.
"What's your name?" the girl asked.
Despite their color, her eyes were full of warmth. The contrast reminded her of Bishop Sebastian.
"A-Aria," the girl sniffled.
"Aria," The girl repeated it slowly, almost testing the sound. "That's a beautiful name. I'm Asu-Madeline. Yes. I'm Madeline. It's a pleasure to meet a sweet young girl like you."