Asuka POV:
It's weird sitting next to a man you've only ever heard legends of. They always make them sound grand and untouchable—like gods in human form. But hardly do they ever live up to the legend. Either the stories overinflate their deeds or hide truly horrid things they did.
Not the emperor.
If anything, the legends don't do him justice. His presence. His attitude. The way he walks. The way he speaks. He carries himself like he truly is an Aeon. If Anastasia was arrogant, he is whatever's after that. I would be awestruck if I wasn't so afraid.
Without even breaking a sweat, he suppressed my contra with his anima. I didn't even know such a thing was possible.
I've never had my power stripped from me, not so cleanly, not so easily. It left me hollow and furious, my pride raw. I want to make him pay for that humiliation. But I can't. The helplessness only sharpens the anger.
"You aren't as talkative as I would have thought," the emperor suddenly said, "Typically children with such grand ambitions are a lot more outgoing."
We are sitting by a field where horses grazed lazily, tails flicking at flies. Or at least, he was sitting. I quietly stand beside him with my arms crossed behind my back. Strange. I don't naturally stand like this. It's almost like he commands respect out of me.
A breeze tugged at my hair, but even the wind seemed to bend around him.
"You were the one who wanted to speak to me. Not the other way around," I snap back.
Shocking me, he laughs—deep, amused. Like an adult humoring a child playing soldier.
"Most of the royals would call for your head if you spoke to them with such lack of respect."
"And you won't?" I ask.
"Please. I'm not so weak to let the words of others wound me. Especially from one so small," he replied. His haughty smile making my soul blaze with fury.
"What do you want? I would much rather be heading back home to my friends."
His eyes remained forward and he took in a long breath. Just wasting time.
"What is your goal?"
I turn to him, confused at the question.
"What? Why would you want to know that?"
"Does it matter? Your emperor asked you a question. I will not repeat myself."
I want to leave. Just turn and leave him to his horses and forget he exists. But I know I can't. He'll put me on my knees and make me answer with my face on hard wood.
"Peace. Throughout the world. I want to make a world where all people can live without worry."
"Oh. Quite the ambition you have. How do you plan to achieve this?"
As he asked, he turned to me. I didn't expect this. I try my best not to show any expression on my face, but I can tell he sees my nervousness.
"I-I don't know," I whisper.
"You don't know," he says mockingly, "Not even a semblance of an idea. Why is that?"
I didn't know how to respond. I know exactly why. But to put it in words is difficult.
"I used to believe it would be so easy. Just prance around the world and tell people to be better. Then I learned about demons and thought that all I had to do was defeat all of them and peace would be inevitable. But, people do bad things too. Am I to kill all humans as well? Would be easy. But that wouldn't be right."
I look over to the emperor to see his reaction. His smile is gone. He still didn't look at me, but his gaze was more distant. Like he was remembering something warm. A happy memory.
"Youth. Even when you try to expand your mind, you still end up so shortsighted."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Oh don't worry about it. Though I suppose you being as young as you are, it's good you realize it isn't so simple. Still, you don't have the slightest idea. Especially for you."
I stood beside him confused by his words.
"In any case, I no longer need you. You may go."
"What? That's it?" I thought in frustration.
Clenching my fist and grinding my teeth, I leave the emperor's side as fast as I can.
~
Even after finally getting something to eat, I was still frustrated after meeting the emperor. I never realized just how much my strength meant to me. But thinking back on it, I always did feel excited when I felt strong. When fighting the demon, there was a part of me that felt good. Ecstatic even. The sight of something I hate groveling beneath my feet... it's a pleasure I want to feel again.
The emperor was infuriating to be around, but apart from being an ass he hasn't really done anything to me. Yet my desire to kill him is so strong. One small humiliation and I hate him almost as much as the demon who killed my best friend. Am I really this prideful?
My face darkens with my thoughts.
"Is this what he meant when he said 'Especially for you'? Because my demonic half is influencing my thoughts? No. Maybe it only brings the negative thoughts I try to suppress to the front."
I try my best not to think negatively of myself, but when left to myself it's hard not to reflect on what I've felt and done. Anyone with half a brain can see the contradiction with what I want to become and what I want the world to be. But such is the nature of man.
'To fall is to be human. And to be human is a blessing.' Those words echo in my head. I understand what the words mean and maybe there is truth to them. But still... I am a Trinity, not human. I can and will be able to do things no human can hope to achieve. Can I really appraise myself with human standards?
"Ugh. Should a twelve-year-old really be having such depressing thoughts? Well, I don't need to worry about this stuff anyway. I know what is right. I just need to focus on the end goal. Everything will fall into place eventually. Plus, this sandwich thing is really good. What do they call it again? Burger? So juicy."
I try to distract myself with the intoxicating flavor of the burger, but my mind can't help but wander back to those thoughts.