"Brat." Was the smooth, yet cold reply.
If you could even call that a reply. That was closer to an acknowledgment than anything else.
The blazes making up his eyes seemed to shift, sliding off me with surprising ease as they landed on my mother.
"Sister." He grumbled out much the same way.
She mumbled something against my back, something not even I could hear, but just before she sucked in a breath and was about to say something tangible, Susan spoke up again.
"Here to finally see mother after all these years?" He asked.
I expected venom, I expected a stinging tone, when the question began. Where I knew it would lead.
Yet, he just sounded so tired.
I couldn't see my mother's face right now, but I'd imagine she'd look just as shocked as I feel.
"...I suppose so." She finally said aloud, oh so convincingly.
Susan snorted, "Of you're own volition, too, sounds like." The King of Yomi leaned back into his throne and sighed, his hand reaching under his straw hat to rub his eyes.
Once again, that bitter, angry sting is just nowhere to be found.
He doesn't even sound grumpy, just completely and utterly exhausted.
"Are you…" My mother's voice came out, and I knew then she recognized exactly as I did, "Nori, put me down, please."
I slid her off my shoulder without a second thought.
As soon as her slippers touched the ground, I saw that the murk and gloom seemed to instinctively bend and recede around her, forming a perfect circle of actual color around each foot.
The color of dull stone it may be, true, but it was color nonetheless.
I blinked, finally noticing that the same phenomenon was present around my sandals, too.
Neat.
Ama huffed as she turned, and just before I lost sight of her face, I could see the concerned frown creasing her jaw.
"Are you," she repeated, her voice going far softer, "are you okay, brother?"
Susan let out a gruff snort at that and replied plainly, "What do you think, sister?"
She took a step forward, the gloom receding wherever her steps took her, "I think you don't sound so. I'll admit, I was surprised. Your return may have been recent, but I expected you'd make at least some fuss, yet…" She trailed off, leaving the implication obvious.
Susanoo, though, merely raised his hand, waving her off, "So what if I didn't, eh?" He grunted, "Last time I made some fuss, I got a scythe in the chest for my efforts." At that, he finally raised his head.
The fires in them were clear, and we could see the blue eyes that were once hidden underneath.
They looked tired. Aged. In a way I couldn't quite place.
"By the way," his eyes moved to me, "don't worry about the dog, brat." He tacted on, almost casually, "I learned my lesson, I won't be poking around that whole thing again."
I was never worried for Tobio, but that's nice to hear. I'll make sure to tell him sometime.
"That's…good to hear, uncle." I reply, slowly.
There's something off here, clearly, but I don't know how to go about addressing it.
That done, he looks back at Ama, "And before you ask again," he speaks up again, "no, I don't need anything or some shit. I'm just tired. Didn't see shit on the other side, don't even remember it, I just…" He slouches in his chair and huffs out, long and deep.
"Don't bother me." He intoned with finality, something other than exhaustion for once, "Go, spend time with mother. Just let me relax, and see to all I missed while I've been gone."
Ama began reaching her hand out, like she wanted to do something, but it stilled fast, dropping back down at her side.
"I…" Ama uttered, "Alright, brother. We'll get out of your hair."
She looked back at me, and I saw the concern twisting the look of confusion on her face.
At the same time, despite gazing toward me, the look in her eyes made it seem as though she was reliving something else, from a long time ago.
For my part, I wanted to interject. Jape, say something, shoot the shit, anything.
Everything just felt so utterly and completely off, though, that it wouldn't feel right at the moment.
Even if he did deserve it.
Without another word, I took Ama by the hand and led her away, my memory quickly filtering the path to Izamami's chamber to the forefront of my mind.
He said nothing more, even as we left.
So…weird.
Even from the novels, while they said gods could come back, it was never actually shown before what happens, during, or after.
So maybe this is just what happens: mental fatigue post revival could make sense, I suppose.
I'm not entirely satisfied with that assumption, though.
Especially since…
My memories rewind, like going back several dozen pages in a book.
His eyebrow twitched, 'I know because I saw the same thing once before. The same look on her face was on his when he came back from death.'
And the memory replayed, word for word, Susanoo's smug and condescending reverberating between my ears like I had heard it yesterday.
A feral grin spread across his face, 'Kagustuchi. After dear old Dad killed him, I was there when he came back. Had the same look she did, he started ranting about…something, seeing things after death.' He shrugged, 'Didn't pay much attention to that though, I was too busy putting him in the ground again.'
Back during my confrontation with Susanoo, he said those words when talking about Kagustuchi, and before that, very briefly, Uzume.
When they had died and come back.
It sounded like both of them were traumatized by something they saw on the other side.
But Susanoo just pointed out that he didn't see anything, that he doesn't even remember anything, specifically.
He could be lying, of course. That's always a possibility. But then again, why would he need, or want to? He didn't exactly sound in the mood for it, and there couldn't be a scheme that would require it, right?
Or, could their mental state after coming back have been due to their deaths themselves?
I don't know how Uzume died during the war, but Kagustuchi definitely had one hell of a traumatizing death. The guy was just born, killing his mother, before he was then cut to ribbons by his own father.
Hmm, I feel a bit more confident in that line of thought, but I'd need to know how Uzume died to make that feeling concrete.
I glance toward my mother, walking beside me at an even pace, her head slightly tilted down and staring at the ground.
She looked lost, and she wasn't even the one leading the way.
…Maybe later, bringing that up right now feels like it'd be in extremely poor taste.
I squeeze her hand a little, drawing her attention a fraction before speaking up, "You good?"
Silence, for a beat.
"He's handling it better than Uzume did, at least." She finally says, wistfully.
I let a small smile grace my lips, "That's something, at least." I pause before adding, "It's good to see you care about at least one of your siblings, though."
Ama blinks at that, the haze of the distant past fading as she frowns, and looks up at me, pouting a bit, "Well, why wouldn't I? He's my crybaby little brother, after all!"
Oh man, which example should I give?
Well, more like which example should I give that won't cause her to immediately try and hide in a cave again and plunge all of Japan into an eternal night?
"The horse." I stated simply.
I'm of course referring to the horse Susanoo apparently flayed, before throwing at her loom and killing one of her handmaidens.
"Ah?" She tilted her head, before perking up as she remembered, "Oh, Fuchi-chan! Yeah, that whole thing…wasn't pleasant." Ama summarized with a clipped tone, "I revived her afterward, but still, poor Fuchi…you'll see her sometime when we go back, she's such a good girl!"
Huh? She revived the horse?
Oh, right! Odin revived Fafnir in the novels. If he could do that with a powerful dragon, Ama doing that with some horse is totally possible.
"Just uh," Ama continues, somewhat nervous, "try not to make any loud noises when she's around? Like shouting and stuff, she's a bit…yeah." She tries to explain, before just settling on that, for obvious reasons.
I, meanwhile, frowned.
You know, I've never even meant this horse, but I feel the need to punch Susanoo in the face again for some reason.
I'm drawn from diving too deep into such fantasies by the abrupt chuckling coming from Ama.
"I see that look on your face," she points up at me with a free hand, a knowing smile on her face, "I know it well. Trust me, I understand. But that was, gosh, so long ago now…" she shakes her head, "no point in getting mad about it now. No point in staying mad about it, even more so."
When she said that, a new question raced to the tip of my tongue.
Then what about Tsukuyomi?
I decided against throwing it out because I know even bringing him up would be enough to piss her off.
And I'd rather her not be in such a state right before I make her see her mother.
I'm sure Izanami could probably draw her out of it, but best not to put them in the first place, no?
Instead, I settle on, "Huh," I hum, "how shockingly un-deity-like of you!" I exclaim, sarcasm dripping clear.
Ama gives me an over-dramatic scoff at that, "Why, of course! What do you take me for, a Greek?"
I snorted loudly at that.
True that, mom, true that.
Shortly thereafter, I come to a halt, bringing Ama to a halt right beside me.
"This is the room she uses as her bedroom here…?" Ama trails off, her smile suddenly forlorn as she gazes at the door and the surrounding hall.
Ah, right. The palace here in Yomi mirrors the palace in Takamagahara, where Ama lives.
I wonder what room this is back up there for Ama to start looking like that?
Unfortunately, I don't really have time to ask that question, or even really think to ask that question.
Because the door promptly flings open right in front of us, not too many moments after we had stopped in front of it.
"Oh! My little Ama-tan~!"
I didn't even see the goddess as she came in; I just heard her cries of joy.
Then, all of a sudden, I wasn't holding Ama's hand anymore, and she was just there.
Standing in the doorway, suffocating my mother by putting her in the most inescapable bear hug I think I've seen.
Well, the bear hug isn't really the problem; it's more so the fact that she smashed my mother's face right into her chest, smack dab between the mounds.
Ah. So it's a family tradition, then?
Ama thrashed around in her group, trying to escape, likely trying to breathe, but Izanami didn't even seem to notice.
"Oh, my little sun," she caresses her hand down Ama's hair, her smile just as bright as the sun she claims Ama is, "I've missed you so much~! And, oh!" She looked toward me, and her smile, somehow, got blinding, "My little grandson too~!" She cried out, tears pricking the corner of her eyes.
For a second, I was afraid I was going to be suffocated to death as well as she reach out for me.
Instead, all she did was put a hand on my face and caress my cheek.
"Ah~, what a welcome surprise~! I'm so happy, I could die again…" she trailed off, sniffling.
And it is with this that I know I made the right choice.
Even if the big pants primordial kami bitches come down from their greater heaven or whatever to fuck me up as soon as I get back to Takamagahara, I'll never regret skipping out on that stupid ceremony for this.
It's worth it. I'll never, ever, regret this moment.
With one of Izanami's arms not holding her down, Ama finally managed to wiggle her face to a position she could breathe, her head tilted up, and her face now comically poking out between her bust.
"P-Please, don't joke like that, mother…" Ama manages, short of breath.
Izanami met Ama's gaze with her ghostly green eyes, positively glowing despite her deathly pale complexion, "Who said I was joking, hmm~?"
"M-Mother!" She exclaimed in a chastising tone.
Izanami relents easily with a chuckle, "Oh, fine, I won't! Now, come in, come in! Oh, it's such a shame I don't have anything prepared for you two…" She trails off, starting to mumble quickly to herself about the lack of proper drinks, snacks, anything to do at all, and more.
At the same time, despite the order, she doesn't Ama go.
Oh, she lets me go just fine, but even as my mother whines, Izanami doesn't loosen her grip one bit.
I couldn't help chuckling as I followed her in.
~ A New Sun ~
True to her concerns, there wasn't much to do.
Much else besides talk, that is.
I ended up lying there, content to just listen and watch as Izanami coaxed everything she could out of Ama.
I'll be honest, at times, my eyes started glazing over.
The two had a lot to catch up on, and I didn't think I would need to commit everything to memory.
And unlike Ama, I had actually been keeping up with Izanami.
Cell service Yomi might lack, but a clone or two running down here after something big happens to tell her all about it isn't difficult.
It's dodging those damn horny oni that's a problem.
But the clones manage well enough.
As such, besides maybe the most recent events with Cult Sword, I didn't need to interject or add anything myself.
So I didn't.
Not until I was finally addressed.
"I'm sorry I ignored you, dear."
My eyes shot open as Izanami's smooth voice wafted my way, guilt clear.
"Eh." I huffed, turning on my side to look at her, "I didn't feel ignored. Besides, you two had a lot to get through, I understand."
I stopped midway during my turn over, blinking.
Izanami chuckled lightly, "It would seem she's still tired, hmm? I'm not exactly surprised, considering everything…" Her pale hand gently caressed Ama's cheek as she spoke.
The Ama, who was fast asleep, was sitting in Izanami's lap, her head freely leaning against her mother's bosom.
I moved onto my side with an easy smile on my face now and remarked, "I should have brought her down here far sooner, then."
Izanami gave a noncommittal hum at that, offering nothing else.
She didn't need to after all.
Unfortunately, my smile slowly began to dip.
Not because of anything that had been said or done, but because of the thought of what I really need to bring up next.
There would be no better time than now, right? After this, we'll be heading back to Takamagahara, and who knows when I'll next get the chance to ask, or even see, Izanami again.
"Ah?" Izanami breathed out with a tilt of her head, "Nori, I see that look on your face. What's the matter, dear?"
Fuck. I'm going to hate ruining the mood like this.
I take a steadying breath and proceed to do the verbal equivalent of ripping off a bandaid.
"Susanoo." I state simply.
Izanami's stroking of Ama's cheeks slows.
"Ah…" Izanami sighed, "Of course. You noticed it too, hmm? He's…changed," Izanami strained, "ever since he came back."
I raise my eyebrow, "You think it's more than just him being tired?"
Izanami nods, solemnly, "I know so. I was there when he came back. It was some time around a month ago, I believe." She looked down, ghostly eyes flickering, "He passed out shortly after he arrived, clinging to me. He was mumbling nonsense I couldn't fathom, and when he woke up? He claimed not to remember anything. I've…never seen anything like it."
That bodes well.
"So, I'm going to assume the manner of his death didn't particularly matter, then?" I muse.
"No, such things typically don't." Izanami shook her head, "Unless something that affects the soul is utilized in some way, but that wasn't the case here. Even then, a deity can heal from damage to the soul during the process of revival. Destruction even, if enough faith is acquired."
On some level, I think I knew that already. That's why in the novel sealing a god is the preferred method. After all, anyone with Senjutsu can touch the soul. Several Sacred Gears can do it; someone like Le Fay could probably whip up a spell to do it, too.
The power to target a soul isn't exactly rare around here. If all it took to prevent a deity from coming back was that, you'd think it would have been tried and tested already.
I sat up on the bed.
"If you've never seen anything like it," I begin, eyes narrowing in thought, "what do you usually see?"
"Nothing." Izanami answered.
My face scrunches up, "...Nothing at all?" I elaborate.
Izanami nods, "Nothing at all." She confirms, "I didn't. During the war between the Earthly and Heavenly Kami, none I saw had reactions to returning quite like that, either."
I opened my mouth before slowly closing it.
So, wait, hold on.
Kagutsuchi had visions, and that was definitely before that war Izanami was talking about.
But Izanami died around the same time as him, yet saw nothing.
Then, following that, during this war, those who fell didn't see anything.
Yet, during the Great War, which followed, Uzume died and presumably saw something.
Now, Susanoo also saw something.
What in the fuck.
Why the pick and choose?
Honestly, the only thing I can really think of is it relating to the power of the deity in question.
I imagine Izanami is just that strong; she may not have been affected, while Uzume and Kagutsuchi, meanwhile, were far weaker, which resulted in them taking some kind of backlash.
Meanwhile, Susanoo, who's on the level of Chief Gods, seemed to get off pretty light in comparison.
But then what about the Kami who perished during the Earthly v Heavenly Kami War? Were they all Primordial Kami like Izanami?
Even if that explains it, why the hell would being a weaker god result in some sort of mental backlash from revival?
It's just so weird.
I perk up as a hand comes down atop my head.
"I see that look upon your face." Izanami broke into my thoughts with a melodious voice, her hand gently caressing the back of my head, "Trust me when I say, trying to parse the domain of death won't get you anywhere." Her smile turned significantly sadder, "My husband once tried. Susanoo, to this day, still tries. Not I, nor Hades, nor any divine who presides with death can truly come to terms with it still."
Presides…with death? Not over it?
Before I could think about that further, I was pulled closer, Izanami letting out a content hum as she brought me against her side.
"So, don't twist your mind trying to figure it out." Izanami pats my back, her voice barely above a whisper in my ear, "I will take care of Suanoo and whatever this is; there is no need to worry for him. In the meantime, before I must let you go…can we just stay here, like this? For a little while?"
The perfect pitch, the smooth tone, I can hear it start to crack apart in Izanami's voice by the end.
I nod and nuzzle up against her, the goddess stifling a happy little whimper as she wraps her arms around us both.
For now, I don't see why not.
For just a little while, we can stay like this.
But I don't think I'll be able to let this matter rest so easily.
Something just feels so utterly and completely off about this, and it's annoying me that I don't have the answers!
Especially since, as it's related to the death of deities, what could this mean for the death of Him?
And His potential resurrection.
Thoughts for another time, perhaps.