Narrator-POV:
"Come one, come all to today's rookie tournament that will blow you out of your socks!"
The crowd cheers, the haters leer, and the noobies quake in fear; excitement builds up in the participants' bones, rattling and shaking with every breath. It is more viewers than they have ever seen.
At least, some feel the pressure.
"Hey, Swole, watcha doing?" Barry is one of the nervous ones, looking over his friend's shoulder and stealing a glance at the messy notes on his lap. Swole's sides are occupied with girls and pokemon alike, so he settles down behind his childhood friend as he waits for the other trainers to find their seats.
Barry turns his head left and right, noticing how optimal the spot is for spectating the matches. They are on the second set of temporarily constructed bleachers - the first one underneath them is filled to the brim with viewers. A walkway separates the rows so nobody sits directly in front of Swole.
He can take in the whole view from above without anyone's head blocking the way. Barry's sight, on the other hand, is mostly blocked by Swole's head and Lopunny's ear. He switches to the seat on his left to solve the ears problem.
Other trainers are not bothered by the crowds. Ash Ketchum, carrying a bucket of popcorn from the food stalls just outside the temporary stadium, sits down beside Barry, and Brock - being tall enough to look past Lopunny's ears - takes the other side.
Eventually, Swole puts away his pen and greets his friends. "Oh, hey Barry. And Ash and Brock. Watcha doing, guys?"
"That's what I asked! You answer first."
"I'm taking notes."
Barry is not impressed. "Duh. I can see that. What kind of notes? Aren't you nervous? And how are you doing? We've barely seen each other since we got to Veilstone City."
"I know... I've just been swamped with things I have to do. Training, etcetera. You know what I mean?"
Barry nods. "Totally. I've been so excited for the tournament - to prove how strong I've become as a trainer. It's a great opportunity to see where everyone is in terms of skill."
"That's not what I... never mind." Swole lets out a tired good grief. "I'm using this as practice. In a way, a trainer battle is very similar to survival in the wilderness. There's only so much you can do in the heat of the moment, so the best way to fight is to be prepared."
Swole taps on his notes.
"I'm writing down who to look out for and what strategies they are likely going to exploit. So far, it seems Asshole is actually going to be the greatest threat."
"You mean Paul?" Ash butts in. "He's not so tough; you should be looking out for me! I'll win this today!"
"He's plenty tough. I looked up some of his battles, and he seems to come up with new, fully evolved pokemon every time."
Barry nods along. "Apparently, from the rumors I heard, he's the reason why gym leader Maylene is missing. Asshole humiliated her in battle, and she went out into the wilderness to train without telling anyone."
Swole thinks back on what he learned of Paul's personality. A brash guy who seemingly hates the world and is not afraid of letting the world know it. A hateful person, and Swole feels sick to his stomach remembering that Paul once thought they were alike.
His notes contain snippets about it. He will battle without holding back, taking the most optimal pokemon for type effectiveness.
In another world, Banette could have been a hidden ace up Swole's sleeve. But alas, he will have to resort to his known ace.
'Lopunny against Paul's choice. No way to predict who he'll choose - a rock paper scissors situation. Consider changing to Lucario in case Paul chooses Primeape.'
After a brief look at his notes, Swole crosses it out and writes down 'Lucario versus Primeape - most likely'.
He rubs Lopunny's thighs as he whispers a quiet apology.
'Salazzle against Barry's Heracross.'
Barry's choice is too obvious.
'Lopunny versus Pikachu.' He writes it down before immediately crossing it out. Ash is too chaotic. He has seen him throw away a safe win because his weakest team member did not get to fight yet. There is no way to make a conclusion yet.
"You're not worried about Akari?"
"Of course I'm worrying about Akari, Barry. She's building a whole town almost on her own. That has to be very stressful."
"I meant in the tournament. I'm seeing notes on everyone except the girls. You're not taking them not seriously, right? That would be sexist."
"Don't look into my notes, dude. Rude."
"Don't make assumptions about my choices, dude. Rude."
Swole rolls his eyes and crosses out Heracross. A spy got into his notes and turned them useless.
"You're taking all the fun out of the tournament with your overpreparedness." Barry grabs his friend's shoulders from behind and notices how tense they are. "You still know how to have fun, right?"
"Of course. I make sure to design our training sessions to be fun and engaging so that motivation doesn't drop off."
"Bruh."
"What?"
"Bruuuuh!"
"Stop shaking me!"
"Bruuuuuuuuuh! You're so oooold! And laaame!"
"F-fffun?" Swole stutters. "Is that a new pokemon move?"
"F-fffuck off." Barry laughs out loud as he sits back down. "Try relaxing a little for a change. You can't just train and plan and train even more all day."
"I'm also fooling around with girls."
"Yeah? Is that before or after you take them out on dates? Honestly, from what you're telling me - and from knowing Dawn - it sounds like way too much work to be worth the hassle."
"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?!"
"Shush, Dawn. You heard what the man said."
"Don't shush me, mister!" Dawn leans across Akari to smack Swole's shoulder as hard as she can.
Swole chuckles. "See, Barry? I still know how to have fun."
"Nah, man. You know how to be funny." Barry sighs. "No joke, I actually think you forgot how to have fun. You've changed."
"Of course I've changed. It's part of growing up."
"Adults can still have fun. Just look at what's-her-name; she's having fun."
Barry points, and Swole's eyes follow his finger.
"Wow! What a hit! Arcanine took some real damage!" The referee-and-commentator shouts into the microphone. Today's scheduled organizer called in sick this morning, so this woman took her place. Excitement and energy radiate from her body, her gestures, her lips... but not her eyes.
No matter how hard she tries to fake it, the smile cannot reach her eyes.
"That's Jupiter. And she hates every moment of this."
"How can you tell? Is it one of your Aura tricks?"
"Nah, Barry. I've just met her a few times. She's a grumpy liar. I've only seen her genuinely happy when someone else is suffering."
"Yikes. Seriously?"
"Seriously." Swole nods. "And as far as I am aware, every single adult is always grumpy and/or lying."
"What about your mom?"
"Grumpy. Want to try my dad next?"
"No deal." Barry chuckles. "He's always grumpy."
"And he's lying too. Like Dawn. She's also on her way to being a proper adult. She always lies and is grumpy."
"I'm not! Now stop making stuff up and watch Marley... lose. Oh."
Arcanine slides across the neatly kept grass of Veilstone City's park. His snout is bloodied, and blackened splotches mark the ground, some still glowing hot, where Flamethrower failed to defeat the enemy.
Marley, hanging her head in shame, presses the button of her pokeball to recall Arcanine. Gothorita copies her motions exactly with a little dummy-pokeball in her tiny hands.
"Good grief." Dawn sighs. "Did I cause her loss by putting attention on her?"
"Dawn, that's schizophrenic."
"You're schizophrenic; shut up." She turns to her other side, catching Ursula's attention as she stands up from her seat. "Good luck, Ursula!"
"Good luck." Times seven. Half of all the tournament participants wish her the best for her fight.
Why?
"Thanks, guys." Ursula marches off, heading down the bleachers and meeting her match.
Zoey states the fact nobody wants to say out loud. "She's gonna lose."
"Yep." Times seven.
Because her randomly selected first opponent is Paul Shinji. Also known as Asshole.
---
"KO!" Jupiter shouts into the microphone, her amplified voice drowning out the cheering crowd. "Paul Shinji and Weavile are the winners!"
Ursula allows the breath she held ever since their final trade began to escape. Dragon Breath did not break through Icicle Crash like she had hoped, and the fight's fate had been sealed.
Her ears ring with the noise of a stadium of people cheering for her failure. "I'm sorry, Gabite. Next time, we'll be better."
Eyes brimming with budding tears stare at the ground in front of her feet. A voice pierces through her haze.
"Pathetic." Paul sneers from the other side of the arena, and Weavile flicks Ursula off with her middle claw. Arms crossed, he stares down his nose at his opponent. "Zero strategy. Were you even trying to win?"
Tears dry out in an instant as sadness twists and turns to hatred. Hateful eyes gleam at the hateful teen. Ursula has already vowed to become a proper trainer, but with the humiliation burying itself deep into her heart, the promise grows into a goal.
She will become stronger than him, she will become strong enough to cast off her fears, and she will return this loss with interest.
A red beam snags across the battlefield, picking up Gabite. Clenched teeth grind against each other as she picks up a mask. "Well fought, Paul. Good luck with the rest of the tournament."
She turns around, trying but failing to ignore the taunting words.
"I don't need luck."
Her eyes trace along the crowd as she approaches the stairs. Time seems to slow to a crawl as the faces twist and turn in her imagination.
Ridicule, jeers, pointed fingers, and shrill laughter all at her expense. But in the crowd, a few friends. Pity. Pity oozes from their faces. Poor Ursula lost the match. Again.
Another failure. Not a single victory under her belt. And they know it. Ursula knows they know it. She can see it in their faces.
All except one.
The man who watched the whole fight intently, trying to make a map of Paul's strategies. He stares at her not with pity but with something worse: disappointment.
Swole stares straight through her facade, piercing her soul with a gaze that says, "You can do better." And it stings so much more than all the others.
"How?" She whispers through clenched teeth. She knows how. Train, study, and practice.
She pushes through the crowd, up the stairs, and wishes Dawn the best of luck as their paths cross. She reaches her group of friends with a smile on her face. "That was something, eh?"
Shame burns her from the inside out as empty platitudes fall on deaf ears.
The walkway that served as a little bit of foot room when they were seated now becomes her stage. Swole just happens to sit front and center for her performance. "I think I'm gonna head out first. Nurse Joy is probably going to tan my hide if I don't get Gabite to her soon."
A few chuckles, a few words of goodbye.
Ursula turns away. "See you later."
"Good luck out there."
She freezes in her steps.
"I really hope we'll meet again."
A real smile tugs at her quivering lips. "I hope so too. If not soon, then at the Lily of the Valley. That's a promise."
Ursula - proud, cocky, and brash - holds her head high as she stalks away. A new purpose blossoms in her heart as her old dream dies.
Not soon after, she passes a corner and disappears from sight.
Swole's gaze lingers for a while. He feels some pride swelling in his soul. He wonders, does his father feel the same when he watches his son grow?
But then his attention flickers back to the present. The banter begins the moment Dawn's opponent makes it onto the stage.
"What took you so long?! Did you have to powder your nose on your way here?!" Dawn starts, and Swole raises an eyebrow.
Her enemy yawns and covers the clip microphone on his doublet in the same motion. "Stupid says what?"
"What did he say?" A few members of the audience couldn't hear his voice.
"I'm not falling for that old trick, Kenny!"
Kenny - the flamboyantly dressed teen who was abused as a child - strikes a pose that puts his figure on display. Embroidery on his regal clothing sparkles as sunshine bounces off. "You fell for it often enough, Dawn."
Swole watches the banter with growing suspicion. "Something's wrong. Does Dawn know that guy? Why does he look familiar?"
"He's our nemesis." Zoey replies, although she does not think of him so highly - a thorn in her side is more likely. "Dawn and I keep losing to him and his partner. You'd know this if you came to watch us live more often."
"Partner?" Swole asks, equal amounts of relief and hope in his voice. "Is he gay?"
Barry chuckles. "Why do you ask? Interested in him?"
"No. But he's clearly flirting with Dawn."
"What?" Barry, Ash, Zoey, Marley, and Akari all expose themselves as stupid (stupids say what).
Only Brock gets it. He nods along as Swole explains.
"Teasing Dawn is the easiest way to get her attention. She has a really short temper."
"But that will only make Dawn hate him." Akari does not see the bigger picture.
"It's what I did. And I would say the strategy works." Swole cups his hands around his mouth as the banter between the trainers intensifies. "Beat his ass!" Swole shouts, barely audible over the crowd's noise. "Stomp him in the ground!"
Then, a few other members of the audience follow his lead, making their favoritism known. Some cheer for Kenny's destruction, others tell Dawn to go back to the kitchen, and a few keep themselves quiet, fearing getting canceled.
Dawn smiles, shouting as the leering reaches a crescendo. "You know what?"
"You said what, stoopid!"
"You too!" Dawn curses under her breath. "I will stomp you into the ground, you annoying brat! Empoleon, let's beat his ass!"
Her pokeball arcs through the air and pops open. Empoleon arrives on the battlefield but looks at his trainer with a frown on his trident-like face. The kind that says, "Where did your grace go, Dawn?"
He straightens himself out, pretends to correct a cravat around his neck, and flashes a one-armed penguin salute to the audience while Kenny's pokemon appears on the other side of the arena.
"Show her how it's done!"
In a cloud of pink smoke, a pokemon appears. Its thick, hair-like plumage trails down her voluminous body, shrouding a slender form that might make some pokemons' hearts flutter like she flutters her eyelashes.
A beguiling scent wafts from her purple and pink feathers - an aroma so sweet and soft that contest judges tend to falter in their judgments.
Aromatisse - the fragrance pokemon. During battle, she can send out a scent that can overwhelm the victim.
With a scowl on his face, Empoleon readies himself to defend his maiden's honor. The stadium might be a different one than expected, but Dawn and he have trained for this exact scenario - to finally take a win.
He readies water-type energy, his beak filling to the brim for an overloaded Bubble. But a mental signal gives him a pause. Dawn uses Aura to whisper him a new order.
"Are you both ready?!" Jupiter's deceptively jubilant voice rings from the speakers arranged around the park stadium.
The audience turns whisper silent. Hushed voices wait for the beginning of the match.
"Begin!"
"Misty Terrain!" Kenny smirks. It is Aromatisse's specialty. Mist, enriched with her aggressive odor, wafts from her body to cover the entire arena in an unbearable smell.
In contests, this causes pokemon to lose their concentration and mess up their meticulously practiced performances.
But today, Dawn does not fight for a ribbon.
"Now! Mess them up with Flash Cannon!"
"Huh?" Kenny mutters moments before a bright, white-hot shine engulfs his pokemon.
---
Swole-POV:
"Aromatisse is KO!" As soon as those words leave Jupiter's lips, I begin cheering at the top of my lungs. "Dawn Berlitz from Twinleaf Town wins the match and advances into the next round!"
"Wohoo!"
The audience joins my lead and applauds and cheers while Dawn recalls Empoleon with a smug smirk growing on her lips. "Wooow." She drags out the word while Kenny clenches his fist. "Imagine losing to a girl. Wouldn't be you, huh? Ring any bells?"
"Harrumpf." Kenny harrumphs and sneers. "I only lost because you've abandoned any and all grace. I guess the country bumpkin and that brute you're hanging out with have finally gotten into your head."
"Country bumpkin?" Zoey quietly curses, clearly offended.
He's not entirely wrong about my description, though. Still, "Brute?" I raise my voice high to sound more like a snob.
Zoey punches my shoulder.
After a few more choice words, Dawn and Kenny leave the battlefield, each with a scowl on their lips and anger brewing in their hearts. But while Dawn's eyes gloat with pride, Kenny's shimmer with shame.
He retreats to his corner of the stadium, says his goodbyes to a few people he must be friends with, and leaves.
Meanwhile, Dawn startles and yelps when she passes by in front of me, and I grab her by the waist, pulling her onto my lap.
"Well fought, Dawn. It was nice to see you and Empoleon fight like this."
"W-what are you doing?" She ignores my kind words, instead focusing on the sensation of my lips on her neck instead - by focusing, I mean trying to swat me away. "Don't do this! I can't go out after you--"
"Too late."
"Nooo!" She wiggles free, but the damage is done. A little bruise grows on the skin on her neck. "Damn it! You can't do that. There are cameras down there, you know?"
"I know. Speaking of down there, my fight is up next. Against... Alice of Alamos. Do you think it's the Alice we know?"
"Who? The one who gave us a hot-air balloon ride?"
"Yeah. The woman with blue eyes, blonde hair that looks a little like Lopunny ears, and decently sized breasts."
Dawn turns around in her seat (my lap) and glares at me. "Couldn't you have missed that last little detail?"
"I didn't say they are a little detail. Decently sized. Now, can you let me up? Everyone is waiting because of you. That's quite rude, you know?"
She gets up, but not before boxing my shoulder. "And good luck in your battle, jerk."
"Thanks." Not that I need it, but I am not rude.
I squeeze Dawn's butt on the way out of my seat and march down the walkway, taking a left at the stairs to arrive on my side of the field.
The perfectly cut grass between the stairway and the chalk-marked arena is in pristine condition. But the OCD-plagued gardener maintaining the park is probably cursing at the sight of the battlefield itself.
Muddy puddles sprung up where Empoleon blasted craters into the soil - blackened, scorched earth is all that remains in some spots.
No obstacles to hide behind. Beams, blasts, and what-nots are going to be extremely powerful.
My opponent - Alice of Alamos - arrives on the other side. It really is her.
When looking her up on the pokeweb, I couldn't find much information about her team. She's been a footnote in two contests, while most of the information has been about her personal life.
She's married. An article spoke about it, but I only read the headline. A golden ring glints on her finger.
A click in my ear tells me the earpiece and microphone on me are now active.
"Hello, Alice. Long time no see." She has aged a lot since we last saw each other. Wrinkles and fading strands in her hair, and she ditched her old fashion, wearing a dress now instead. Honestly, I'm surprised she is 18 years old. Or maybe she got into the tournament some other way? "How is Alamos Town doing? And the science guy?"
"Hi, Swole! Alamos Town is back in proper condition, all thanks to you!" Thanks to me? Hehe. "If it wasn't for you saving our town, we really would have been in big trouble. We never got around to thanking you properly, so in the name of all of Alamos Town, I offer my deepest gratitude. Thank you, Swole Solo from Twinleaf Town, Hero of Alamos."
She bows deeply. It's the type that looks practiced, elegant, and noble. Mom showed me how it's supposed to look, and the moment I think of the lessons, I remember how to gracefully accept the gesture.
I place a fist across my heart and nod in acknowledgement. The greater the difference in status, the deeper I have to bow, but since we're both regular people, a nod is sufficient.
"As for Tonio, I'm afraid I haven't talked with him in a while. Work has been drowning him, as far as I know." She pulls a pokeball from a pocket sewn into her dress. "Now, I think we have spent enough time talking; we're supposed to be battling, right?"
"Don't worry about it. Banter is part of the show."
Barry shouts from the audience, "Your banter is boring! Start fighting."
"Alice! Stop feeding his ego and fight!" That was Dawn. She's sitting on my old spot, right between Lopunny and Akari.
The audience laughs and cheers, telling Alice to knock me down a notch.
I just smirk, roll my eyes, and select the second pokeball from my belt. The luxurious black and golden pokeball opens with a snap while Alice's flies through the air. It pops open, and Salazzle appears on the battlefield at the same time as her pokemon arrives.
A shape materializes on their side of the arena. First, an amorphous blob of red energy, then a round shape. Voltorb? A small Electrode? Or maybe a Diglett looked at from above?
It's Jigglypuff! The balloon pokemon. After inflating himself, he's light enough to be able to float. Their most common ability... which one was it? Was it Cute Charm?
If it's Cute Charm, then we can't afford to make contact moves - so no Fake Out and no Poison Fang.
Jigglypuffs are known for their tendency to Sing, but they get pissed off when their victims inevitably fall asleep while listening.
Infatuation or sleep are both major concerns. If we can't attack, we might not win.
But then, I could use Aura to cheat? Or rather, I need to use Aura to practice my cheat. It won't be cheating in the wilderness; it will be survival.
Next, our winning strategies. Either poison him with Toxic so hitting afterwards doesn't matter, or burn him to a crisp with Flamethrower before they can act?
"Ready?" Jupiter asks, catching my attention with her piercing purple eyes. Her intense stare and her skintight suit keep hold of my thoughts for longer than they should until I wrestle my eyes back to the match.
"Ready."
Alice nods.
"Begin!"
"Sing!"
"Toxic!" I shout before slapping my hands over my ears. Alice does the same, and so do the smarter people of the audience.
"Jig jiggly, Jigglypuff... ♫"
The soft voice grates at my ears, trying to slip past my fingers. Salazzle already slows down, a globule slowly moving up and down her throat before hacking it up and sending Toxic flying across the arena.
By the time it strikes Jigglypuff and ends her song, Salazzle's eyelids have sealed shut, her legs spread-eagle as she lies flat on her stomach, tongue lolling and cute snores escaping her.
Time to practice.
~"Wake up!" It doesn't work.
"Now, use Echoed Voice!"
I close my eyes while Jigglypuff puffs himself up and screams. Focusing on my Aura senses, I can feel how Salazzle trembles in pain - as sound waves chip away at her health.
~"Wake up!"
I need to remember how I did it during our battle against Roark.
Buneary and I had been in sync. But it wasn't a directed use of Aura. It was more like I sent out an order that was so strong, it broke through her sleep.
Then, if I concentrate on our bond... Why is it frazzled like this? Sing has... not really interrupted our bond - that would be impossible - but it's like... bloated and chaotic. No signals can pass through. Like a wire made out of a sponge?
Bad analogy, but if I push harder against our connection, trying to get the order through, ~"Wake up!"
Is it helping? Our bond stabilizes, but starting from her position when her body quakes under pain with another Echoed Voice striking her.
We don't have much time. Each attack will increasingly grow in strength for as long as Jigglypuff can sing uninterrupted. We'll lose soon if Salazzle keeps sleeping.
Her soul fights off the sleep, but that means I'm not actively helping her. I need to do better.
But how?
Screaming?
No. Noise won't help - another Echoed Voice slams into Salazzle, louder than the one before.
I can't enter the battlefield to shake her up.
... I've got an idea.
I clasp my hands over my mouth, hoping to Arceus my voice won't slip free.
~"Salazzle, if you wake up right now, I'll reward you with some serious sexy time tonight."
Her eyes snap open, and our bond stabilizes the rest of the way in an instant. ~"You promise?!"
~"Yes, now use Fake Out, or we're going to lose."
Seeing her through Aura, I can actually spot her movements as she speeds through the world at an unimaginable pace. Her four-legged gait looks awkward even at super speed.
The faster she runs, the wider her legs have to swing around her hips and the lower her torso glides along the grass. Her chest brushes against a few blades of grass, but she's so fast, the grass breaks into shards as if made of brittle glass.
Then I understand - it's not me thinking or feeling faster; it's Salazzle sharing her senses with me through our bond. It's so strange. My limbs refuse to listen to my commands, and even my eyelids stay sealed shut.
Salazzle strikes, and the next move is clear in my mind. ~"Flamethrower." The word escapes my lips, my muscles twitch, and my eyelids snap open - and close and open a few times as my body's signals catch up.
Once again, the world runs at normal speed.
Fire glimmers deep within Salazzle's throat, heating up her scales and making her patterns glow bright pink. Heat distorts the air above her before she unleashes a torrent of flames point-blank at Jigglypuff, that sends him rolling across burning grass.
~"Ember!"
Using the vestiges of Flamethrower's power, Salazzle shoots dozens of fiery projectiles across the arena, most going wide, slamming into the ground blasting tiny craters or into a shimmering wall protecting Alice from harm - but some hit their target, chipping away at Jigglypuff.
"Jigglypuff! Hang in there, and use Hyper Voice!"
Jigglypuff blows himself up, doubling in size, bouncing off the ground, and stabilizing himself mid-air, yet he keeps growing bigger.
"Venoshock! Quickly!"
Dark spots along Jigglypuff's skin light up with a purple shine. Globules of poison seep from his skin, then detach to join others manifesting all around Jigglypuff.
Half a dozen blobs of poison hover in the air like a cage with Jigglypuff in its center. No matter where he looks, pain awaits. He reaches three times his normal size, inches away from bumping into Salazzle's attack.
I press my hands over my ears again, expecting the worst, but Salazzle is fast enough. Venoshock is ready - like bullets, they race through the air, smacking into Jigglypuff one after another as if fired from a machine gun.
Jigglypuff deflates. Air streams from his mouth with a noisy hiss as his body is propelled backwards. He tumbles, he rolls, and a little smaller than before, he comes to rest.
His eyes have turned into swirls.
"Jigglypuff is KO!" Jupiter's voice ends the battle. "Swole Solo from Twinleaf Town and Salazzle win!"
---
The audience cheers while Alice recalls her pokemon, whispering words of encouragement to her pokeball.
Salazzle arrives by my side, much worse for wear than expected. She can't tank much, and this amount of damage would have been enough to take her out if she hadn't evolved.
Her front claws dig painfully into my leg as she looks up at me like some type of freaky, almost-human-sized lizard-dog. Her tail wraps around my ankle. ~"Sssex?"
"Shush. Tonight."
She beams a smile. ~"Yesss!" And she scampers up my leg, over my shoulders - both of them - and she rubs her entire body over my face as she climbs to my back.
Her stomach is still hot from using Flamethrower and Ember.
Once her final leg passes my shoulder, she turns around, hooking a foreleg around my neck and wrapping her tail around my stomach to keep herself steady like some sort of deranged backpack.
Her position matches up perfectly with the scars she burnt into my skin.
As the crowd calms down for the post-match banter, I meet Alice's eyes. "Well fought. How about you hang out with us, and we catch up on the current state of Alamos?"
A few spectators boo. "The fight was too short!" - "Stop flirting and start trashing!" - "She's married! Do you have no shame?!" - "We want to see blood and tears!!"
At least one voice belonged to Dawn.
Alice giggles. "I'll ask Alberto first. He wanted to thank you too."
Alberto... who? "Alright. We're seated over there."
I point at my gang, unsurprised to see them as the loudest source of booing. Barry is about to go into some kind of berserker's rage battling the railing. Meanwhile, Brock cries about Alice being married already and about how unfair life is.
"Maybe you can console Brock too."
"I'll see what I can do." She giggles again then turns around, waving her hand at the crowd with a smile that seems to calm a few of the rowdy bunch down.
Stepping away from the arena, I head for the stairs, up and to the right... My spot is occupied.
Dawn smirks, winks, and blows me a raspberry. "You didn't think of this, huh? Well, the seat to the left of Akari is still free."
She thinks she's so safe in her position, huh? Just because Lopunny fell asleep and ended up using Dawn as a pillow doesn't mean I'm out of options.
Carefully, gently, I pick Lopunny up, lifting her off Dawn and cradling her in my arms. The big-eared pokemon didn't stand a chance against Sing even this far away from the battlefield. A few unlucky people in the lower seats have met the same fate.
A few lucky guys and some gals on the lower seats have wrapped their arms around those sleeping people, just waiting for their partners to wake up while they rest their heads on willing neighbors.
I wonder how many people go to matches to find girlfriends or boyfriends. Probably a lot. Adrenaline, fun, and banter - and of course alcohol - has got to be perfect for matchmaking.
While I looked around, Lopunny shifted in my hold, slinging her arms around my neck. Salazzle complains as she's driven away from my back. Dawn complains when I sit down on Lopunny's seat.
"I wanted you to fight for this spot." Dawn pouts.
I smirk, wink, and blow her a raspberry. "I know. But maybe this will teach you to tell me what you want."
She boxes my shoulder, stirring Lopunny in her sleep even more.
Lopunny then slings her legs around me - one leg on each side. Her arms tighten around my neck, and she nibbles at my ear while dreaming of something pleasant.
"Alright." Dawn pouts harder. "Now I'm really jealous."
"You're always jealous."
While Lopunny sleeps, she kisses my neck and cheek and nuzzles her face against me.
"She winked! She's doing this on purpose just to mess with me!"
"Don't be ridiculous, Dawn. Why would a pokemon do that? Haha." My heart begins to race as the dangerous excitement of exhibitionism begins to grow a tent in my pants. ~"Lopunny, stop messing with Dawn."
She nuzzles into my neck some more, and I can only hope it means, 'Alright.'
"Who is next?" I change the topic.
"Your fight was the last for the block--"
"Wait! Akari! Don't!" Dawn interrupts her. "Don't reward his laziness! Let the cheat look for himself. He knows where the brackets are shown."
"I can't see the screen with Lopunny's ears in my face-- Oh?" She folds her ears closer against her head. "Never mind."
I'm not looking, but I can tell Dawn keeps staring at Lopunny with growing suspicion.
The arena is structured like regular battle locations: a rectangle is painted into the grass with white chalk - the middle line is marked with a pokeball design, and the trainer sections where the pokemon trainers give their commands are outlined too. Viewers can watch from all four sides, but the north side features a large screen, a few booths for personnel, and an elevated referee stand on which Jupiter sometimes sits to view the match from above.
Smaller screens show a live feed of some Rotom drones, and a technician decides which pictures end up on the big screen.
Currently, it just shows a timer ticking down, a few ads for beer and soft drinks, and an overview of the tournament brackets.
The first block of fights is done. It was... somebody against Marley - her opponent's name is still blocked by Lopunny's ear - then Ursula versus Paul, Dawn against Kenny, Alice versus me.
The next block is:
Ash vs. Jamison
Jessilina vs. Akari
Barry vs. Nando
Zoey vs. Brock
Interesting. From the pictures next to their names, it doesn't seem like the 18 and under rule was being followed by the organizers. "Dawn, how much were you involved in the organization?"
"Not much. Team Galactic took over the moment I asked for sponsorship. Apparently they have a small department taking care of tournaments and scheduling things."
I nod along.
"Did you know they have a flock of Porygon doing all the random selections for the tournament brackets? They are tasked with calculating the most interesting match-ups for optimal tournaments."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. Tournaments are rarely actually randomized even when they say they are."
"Huh. Cool. I guess that means the noob-crushing that sometimes happens is because it's more interesting to see that than fair fights in the early rounds."
Dawn agrees with a nod. "I'd guess so too." She sighs. Her next fight in the second round will be her against Asshole. She's a noob who's about to be crushed. Then she smacks her thighs. "So. We still have a few minutes of break time; I'm going to head out to powder my nose. Zoey, are you coming with me?"
"I can't. Ah've got the next battle."
Versus Brock.
"Shucks." Dawn says, and Zoey rolls her eyes. "Akari?"
"I am in no need to powder my nose."
"Haha." I laugh. "She needs to pee. I can accompany you, Dawn."
"Thanks, Swole, but you can't come into the lady's bathroom."
"I can still shout through the door and threaten any would-be perverts with a world of pain if they touch you."
Dawn giggles. "That's not why I need Akari to come with me. Besides, the biggest pervert I've got to worry about is you."
"Me?!"
"Yes." Times five.
Only Brock takes my side. "Swole's a perfectly fine gentleman."
"Thanks, Brock. You too, man." Dawn stands up and coaxes Akari out of her seat. "Alright, Lopunny, let me get up, or I'll have to send you into your pokeball."
She releases me from her pretend-sleepy hug and allows me to stand. Dawn complains.
"Don't worry about it, Dawn. Lopunny woke up just now."
She doesn't stop complaining even as we move along the walkway, down the stairs, and out of the temporary stadium through a small tunnel built into the bleachers. On the other side, past the glaring brightness of the sunlight, awaits the formerly perfectly manicured Veilstone City park.
Blades of grass are knocked over and pressed flat to the ground from hundreds of feet trampling over them. The stadium is surrounded with food stalls and kegs filled with alcohol. A queue lines up to receive more beer - the people talk with each other and discuss the recent battles.
"Let's bet on it." Two men, about twice my age, stand around a chest-height plastic table. Mugs of beer stand on its surface while one man shows the other his phone screen. "Paul has been crushing it in the gym challenge. Check out the total humiliation."
The other man cringes. "How could he do that to Maylene? What an Asshole... Hey... that name has a ring to it, doesn't it?" More like a sphincter.
"Asshole... It does! Let's just make sure Asshole doesn't hear us calling him that. I don't want to get beat up by a child."
"Haha! Me neither!"
Past the food and drinks, another queue marks the bathrooms. Dawn pulls Akari along for the wait.
The grass is less beat up around here, but a clear path between the bathrooms and the stadium can be made out.
I look around for a bench and find an unoccupied one within line of sight of the bathroom.
After sitting down, I open my notebook and update my notes on Aura. The last battle helped me understand it a little more.
It's a shame that Cute Charm did not trigger - if Jigglypuff even has that ability - but it could have served to verify my theory: status moves affect the soul as well as the body. By breaking through the affliction on her soul, the body will be cured as well.
That must also be the method of how pokemon wake up after Sing or Hypnosis as well. If a human is hit by either of those, they will be forced to sleep for a period of time and then stay asleep until they wake up naturally or by being woken up.
Pokemon on the other hand, will wake up as soon as the effect ends. It's because their souls keep fighting even when they're out of commission.
In theory, this should cure poison or burns as well, right?
But how? The way Salazzle did it was through sheer willpower.
She sits on my right, staring up at me with lust in her eyes.
Perhaps not just willpower. It's the desire to fight for me. The bond between a trainer and their pokemon must be the key.
"Swole? Can you hear me?"
"Huh?"
"Sorry for bothering you. Hi."
"Oh. Hello, Alice." She stands before me, right next to Salazzle. Her hands are clasped in front of her chest. Along with her hair and the rest of her posture, she looks a lot like Lopunny whenever she wants something from me. "What brings you here?"
"Whenever I get nervous I... uhhhm, actually, never mind. I had to be here. It's rude to ask."
Ah. She had to pee. "Apologies."
Her posture straightens out, and her similarities to Lopunny dissolve just like that. Alice looks like a proper lady of class - a lot closer to Lucario or Akari. I pat the free part of the bench to my left. "Take a seat."
"Thank you." She lifts the hem of her skirt, doing a curtsy.
"No need to be so formal. How have you been doing? I heard you got married."
"I did..." She inspects the sparkling diamond ring on her finger. Very expensive-looking. A forlorn look crosses her blue eyes, fingers nervously curling a lock of hair before she perks up and forces her hand to her lap. "It was a little bit of a rushed decision, but I'm happy with it. We're on our honeymoon right now."
"You are? Did you visit the meteorite fields yet?"
She shakes her head, her hair buns flopping like Lopunny's ears. "We've only recently arrived in Veilstone City. It was a dream of mine to go on a pokemon adventure, so that's what our honeymoon is: traveling across the region, visiting cities, battling a gym or two, and camping... Lots of camping. Did you know there would be so much camping?"
"I did. But camping with a tent really isn't all that bad. Sure, wild Spinarak can be a little annoying when they climb all over the tent walls, but it can get much worse."
"I guess..."
"Not convincing?"
"It's still a pain."
"You could try traveling with a bicycle. It's much faster. Barry went from Eterna City to Oreburgh City in just two days."
"Does he still meet lots of new pokemon?"
"I don't know..." Meeting new pokemon... We haven't done that in a while either on account of Zoey's mom bringing us to Snowpoint City and Mars bringing us here.
It's really one of the best parts of the journey. But it's ineffective. Wild battles have become too easy. Maybe if we shortcut through the wilderness while fighting whoever we meet? ... That would be a good challenge.
"Swole?"
"Ah, sorry. I was miles away. What did you say?"
"I asked, What do you enjoy the most about your journey?"
"My girlfriends."
She laughs. "Ha! Not even a hint of hesitation."
"Hehe. Yeah. Sorry." I probably sound like a deranged deviant. "It's just, some of the people and pokemon I meet along the way are making it worth it. And those just happen to be my girlfriends."
"And pokemon?"
My breath hitches. Did I say that? Fuck... Fuck! "I mean--"
"You mean your girlfriends and your team, right?"
"Exactly! Yeah. Of course. They take a special place in my heart."
"I get what you mean. I really love Jigglypuff and Kricketot a lot."
"Kricketot?" My father's starter pokemon. "They can become surprisingly strong."
Alice smiles. Her hand wanders to a loose belt around her waist, where two pokeballs sit with pokemon slumbering inside. "Oh, I don't care much for strength. But he has the most beautiful singing voice, and the music he makes is so charming."
"Hmmm..."
"Hm?"
"I just thought of an idea. You like music, right? Have you thought about investigating Oración? I'm not sure about it, but Professor Rowan might pay you for it - actually, I might pay you for it. I have theorized that it might share a connection with Aura."
I might have to ask Dad for money, though.
She waves me off. "I'm already doing that. It's been interesting me all my life, but until now, I could never afford to spend my life on researching."
"Until now? What changed?" Was it the marriage? Did she marry some rich guy? Was that rude to ask?
"... I married Baron Alberto."
BARON Alberto! Ahhh! Now I remember! It's the guy with the Lickilicky! And that's why she's Alice of Alamos, and not Alice from Alamos! "You're a baroness. Congratulations."
Baroness Alice of Alamos giggles. "I guess you didn't realize until now."
"Nope. Baron Alberto was not a pretty woman, so I never bothered to remember his name. He was with us when science-guy solved the Palkia mystery, right?"
"Science guy?" She hides a smile underneath her hand. "I guess you could describe Tonio like that." Then her mood drops. "Science really was everything on his mind ever since we were children. Not once did his attention shift anywhere else."
Tonio... He and I aren't too different. I used to be a nerd - I still am - the only difference is Lopunny, who forced me out of my shell. Or my dad, who sent me to meet her. Doesn't matter - what does matter is that I might have ended up in the same position with Dawn.
"... He never cared for me." Alice mutters. Her voice was still full of rejected defeat.
"I don't believe that."
She makes a rude-sounding noise - the type someone makes when caught off guard. "Huh?"
"I bet Tonio was trying to impress you using the only way he knew how to be impressive." Like how I tried learning fun facts about pokemon, speedcubing, and whatever else young Swole did. Ultimately, only the fun facts got Dawn's attention. She was always curious about the topics I read. "I don't remember much about him - all the other things took precedence, you know?"
She nods, understanding how chaotic that day had been.
"But the way he looked at you, the way he tried being the one to fix everything, he was doing it to impress you, I'm sure."
Alice lets out a drawn-out sigh. She relaxes into the bench and folds her arms behind her head. "Well, too late. And it doesn't matter anymore either. Tonio - the boy I had a crush on since childhood - never existed outside of my imagination." She closes her eyes and sighs again. "It was Darkrai who saved me from a big fall. Tonio was just nearby. I've spent twelve years of my life waiting for Tonio to become the brave hero who sweeps me from my feet - the tough man I imagined him to be somewhere deep in his heart, but..."
People pass by us. Some are heading to the bathroom queue, others going back to the arena. I can't spot Dawn and Akari anymore, so they must be inside the bathroom by now. Alice is taking a really long break. "But?"
"But interest faded. I never got what I wanted-- ... needed. Tonio made me feel like I didn't matter to him. Then someday, Alberto took his place in my heart with his persistent pursuit. When my house was destroyed, Alberto was the first to offer me a new home; Tonio wanted to offer it too - I saw it on his face, the urge to say it, but once again, he didn't say a word. Then, out of a feeling of obligation, really, I gave Alberto the chance he always wanted."
"And now you're married."
Alice giggles. "And now I'm married. It happened so fast, but I don't regret it either. I'm happy... Love is a fickle thing, isn't it?"
"Is it? I hope not. Your story sounds terrifying. Just imagining I could have lost Dawn like that if I was a little bit more like Tonio breaks my heart."
She deflates in an instant. Her arms fall down to her lap, her head falls limp, and her eyes snap closed again. "I feel terrible. Ever since I broke his heart, he's been drowning himself in work. Drowning!"
He doesn't want to think about it anymore.
"He doesn't sleep, he barely eats, and he's wasting away in his basement churning out one research paper after another. I've heard the people from Team Galactic talking about force-feeding him. They need him alive until the world is saved... They've already put guards around him, making sure he can't kill himself... And it's my fault."
"Don't blame yourself. It's his own fault. He is the master of his own life. Only he can make the decisions for himself."
"I know... But I still feel so bad about it."
Hmmm... I can sense her desperation. Alice isn't just venting her frustrations; what she really needs right now is a solution.
How can I make Alice happy? By getting her and Tonio together... No. Then Alberto wouldn't be happy, and Alice would still be unhappy.
Why am I even bothering with it? I have enough on my plate.
... But I should bother with it. What kind of person would I be if I just ignored her plight?
Definitely not the best person I could be. Definitely not anyone who deserves all the lovely people in my life.
So... Tonio... "Does Tonio have any other friends?"
"He lost his other friendships after school." Alice shakes her head.
Friendships take time and care to keep going. I can already feel it eroding with Barry. As he and I grow, we drift apart from each other. Time spent together brings us closer, but... we're rivals. We're forced to stay apart.
Tonio is the kind of person who will let any relationship fall apart. What he needs is someone like Dawn. "Do you know any girls who don't mind taking the first step?"
"What do you mean? Like... hook him up with someone?"
I nod. "There are loads of ambitious women in the world. With your friendship and connection to royalty, and Tonio's income, there must be someone out there for him."
She stares at me with a deadpan expression. "You're talking about a gold digger."
"Exactly. Someone who will love him for the value he can offer, rather than the bravery he can't muster."
"... Now you're making it sound like I'm at fault for wanting him to be a little manly."
"Duh."
She squirms in her seat and scrunches her face.
"You were too picky - that's not a judgment. Just a fact. There are other women out there who aren't like you. And if I were you, I'd start by looking for disgruntled or dissatisfied secretaries. Once you find her, you introduce her to him, and she's going to do all the work, and he's going to be happy."
Rolling her eyes, Alice scoffs. "As if it'd be so easy."
"Ahem." A throat clears itself behind us. I hadn't noticed him, but Salazzle had. Her eyes stay fixed on him while I turn around. A deep red coat with a golden sash slung over his shoulder stands out immediately. A baron with pink, swept-back hair. "He is quite right, my dear."
"Baron Lickilicky..." The image pops back in my mind the moment I remember this golden sash around his pokemon form.
"It's Alberto." His hands seek out Alice's shoulders, giving them a massage while he eyes me up and down. "Nice to meet you again, Hero of Alamos."
... My eyes widen. They snap to Alice. Baroness Alice of Alamos. She can give out legitimate titles. During her little speech during our banter, did she give me an actual hero title?!
"Yes. It's a shame we can't select the heroes we get, but you did save my town." He bows his head. "You deserve the title. Wear it with honor, and don't make me regret it."
"Of course. Thank you, Baron Lickilicky-- I mean, Alberto. It's an honor to receive the title."
"I already regret it." He sighs. "Nevertheless, Alice, I have finished my business--" He meant taking a shit. "And it appears you have received a new quest. I'm certain we will find a proper bachelorette for Tonio if we just look in the right places. One of which is right here in Veilstone City: the Team Galactic Headquarters."
The building in question looms over the city in the distance. It's standing proudly on top of a hill, visible past the park's canopy. Spiky protrusions along the walls give the building a sinister atmosphere.
Dark clouds gather near the top level of the building. It's the wind's fault. It pushes moist air up, cools down, and collects itself in rain clouds. The metal spikes cause stronger ionic charges to build up more quickly, resulting in--
Boom!
Thunder... Well, not quite. Just static electricity that crackles a little along the spikes. The noise was from the arena. The next match must be reaching its climax soon.
... "The next match..." Wasn't it Brock against... "Zoey."
The girls are still powdering their noses, and I'm sitting here. None of us are watching her fight!
Oh no.
I'm boned, aren't I?