The next few weeks, an investigation of the massacre aired from different tv channels I clicked. There was news accusing me of killing my own family. The academy is my alibi, but if they are the one pushing the accusation in the first place, then I need to get away as soon as possible. They made no move, for days I've been expecting for them to barge on the door and take me.
My uncle respected my will to not be checked upon, but I think everyone around me right now are all working for him since no one passed through the security to bother me, there were people blocking me from crowds and flashes of cameras. I never missed a meal and later that night after my uncle left, my stuff arrived in huge suitcases from the mansion.
Yesterday night, I prepared my black duffel bag and backpack. I called the hotel front desk to call my uncle, I told him that I'm leaving for a while, he told me he can take care of things. I told him that there's no need. He replied that 'I should do it my way.' I kind of like how he is not being a pushover. I appreciated him doing what he can for me and not butting on my businesses.
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I opened the suspicious trash bin and opened it. It contains long firearms and bullet chains just as I anticipated. Before my hands reach to grab one long gun. A loud noise broke out outside, the screamings then followed. The people were in chaos. I checked out the nearest cubicle that had a window.
Right before my eyes, the bus lurched into view, its arrival heavy with dread. From a distance, I caught sight of the driver, his forehead torn open, his body slumped like a broken puppet. Around the vehicle, figures loomed with rifles slung across their shoulders, their presence suffocating the air. The passengers I am with a few hours ago panicked. I heard few people wailing. They were huddling together, clinging to one another as if proximity alone could shield them from the storm that had descended.
The armed men were wearing bonnets, few were wearing a checkered scarf that they wrap on their face. They were on motorcycles, others were in a white minivan.
"She got down from the other station, Vincent!" Someone from the bus shouted outside.
"Are you sure?!" Someone from the bikers asked harshly.
"A passenger told me that a lad got down from the last station. There's no doubt it's her."
"She can no longer be contacted sir." Another one from the bikers asked.
"Locate her! What are you waiting for? Everyone! Head to the southbound terminal! You- pointing to someone who is ready to mount on his motorbike- wait for her here she might be just toying with us!" The masked man kicked a motorcycle in front of him and cussed.
A thud sent me flying to my things in the washing area, a masked person entered hastily from the main door wearing a garbage collector outfit, the other door opened and send-in a man wearing a t-shirt printed STAFF. They were both surprised to see me inside the restroom amidst their panic state, the other one quickly rushed to go to the third cubicle I used a while ago, clutching the trash bin as he got out. I could almost feel my heart attempting to jump out from my mouth. This is it….. I never even got to meet my other side of the family. I can no longer give justice to the souls I'm grieving, I guess, this is my end. If then, I can say I'm glad its over.
My hands fumbled, clumsy and desperate, the gun refusing to slip into the bag as if the steel itself resisted me. Two shadows towered before me—men twice my size, their presence pressing down like mountains. Their eyes burned with a weight that seemed to scrape against my very soul, stripping me bare. My pulse hammered crimson through my veins, each beat a reminder of how small I was or how they seemed to look bigger every strike of a second. The air grew heavy, thick with the weight of inevitability, and I felt my spirit tremble under the enormity of their looming forms.
"It's here. Ponching just probably messed with her job. I'm going now, send boss Larry my regards make sure not to get mixed with those wild muslims.....
The person left the same door he came in, the fresh cold air that enters sent shivers down my spine. I could hear the pounding of heavy rain outside. The person beside me did not say anything but I did not bother to look at him.
Without a warning, something hit my head pretty hard and I was knocked out.
.......
Why would a garbage collector collect garbage after midnight?
Oh! The trash bin does not contain garbage. Maybe if they could kill me quickly, it would be fine. I'm just glad it's not the military I guess. But what if they are heading to the Hukbo?
I would be so lucky then.
Or if they are actually heading to a serious communist party other than my family? Or a gang? Or a mafia? I just wished that this Larry guy knew Mira. I heard a few thudding then the sound of the siren sang me to unconsciousness.
...….
I woke up with a heavy throbbing in my head, I looked around, it's dark, but I could make out what the room looked like thanks to the lights that escaped from the window covered with shutters. There are six large trash bins and eight black drums guarded by a sleeping person in the same position as me just without duct tape on the mouth and tied hands.
Later, someone came in, checking the trash bins. I feigned sleep, just breathing, observing and almost sobbing.
I could feel the assigned guard stir up and stand, I checked my breathing again when I caught myself almost panting and tried to breathe properly again.
"He was caught in the transaction area with one of these bins opened. When we checked his bag, he was carrying this 45 caliber with him and he had this on his hand"- footsteps got closer, another person came in the room, someone lifted my left hand where I have this small heart tattoo in my palm along the roots of my thumb. I already had it since as long as I can remember, my mother had the same, and it's one of my reminders of her.
"The chief's tattoo...." The man who came in first, said.
Almost immediately I opened my eyes and shouted with all I could, but all I could hear was a whimper with the duct tape on my mouth....
Three guns were pointed at my head at once, but I did not stop. When someone removed the duct tape, I flinched. It stings but almost immediately I shouted.
"Monica! She's my mom.... Almira." I looked down at my necklace.
He snatched the necklace and still had his gun pointed at me. Everyone was looking at him quietly, we could almost hear my heart beat. He looked at me, especially my hair, probably confirming if I was really a girl. The necklace had a picture of me and mom, my hair was long from that time too. Mira never wanted me to cut my hair and made me promise to not do it no matter what. But after I got into the army, it's mandatory to cut hair and there's nothing I could do about it. Then he looked at my clothes.
"I'm cross-dressing sir, I'm a fugitive for the murder of my family I didn't do. That's why I'm here, to find out about everything, to search for myself?"
El Jieah Francisca Althea Jane, that's how he started calling me, I really don't know why, but I think my mother introduced me as that, or that's my real name. All my life I've been called Jieah and that's my name on my legal papers. He was thrilled to find me for unknown reasons. The Hukbo was in Bukidnon, and he told me about Vincent. He truly is Mira's cousin, but he's an abu sayyaf now. Another communist group. They claim the western part of Mindanao along with the southern part, the Sulu and Tawi-Tawi. The Hukbo was holding the North Eastern part and few communities of the Indigenous tribesmen.
We only travel by night to avoid checkpoints. We did not travel for three nights because there was an overnight checkpoint on the Iligan and Bukidnon boundary. By the fourth night, we transferred to an off-road jeep, with huge wheels and metal-framed harnesses.
We reached a barrack kind of place and I almost jumped from the jeep, then noticed they were not dressed like the army uniform, just normal clothes, they've been carrying with them long guns and the place seems very heavily guarded. They have people in elevated look-out sight, saluting at Larry as we passed on. Brando started tuning in his radio and there were reports of Larry's return echoing. Everyone are starting their nightly preparations. Some were on bonfires drinking booze and some were on their wheels fixing something. We dumped the trash bins, eyes peek everywhere as I realized I do stand out. Some were gawking at me as if I was some kind of animal to be thrown into a pen to fight off another animal. They were looking at my shoulders and my overall appearance. If I'm a boy, I'll be looking timid and thin. Maybe that's what they were thinking too. That I'm an easy target. Larry's men were made to vow to not expose my existence for the mean time to anyone, not even to their family. Larry made me change clothes and gave me a scarf to wrap my face. I don't know what's the deal, but he thinks I should not expose my identity yet.
They left me in the jeep to have their little meeting inside the half-concrete cabin- they calls the 'center'. Moments passed, someone took my duffel and my backpack. I'm in no mood to make any conversation so I just followed it with my eyes. He tied my duffel on a motorcycle and put my backpack in the front. Just another mile of journey I guess.
Larry and everyone else were finally done and was now heading to the jeep where I was in. Along their way, the ladies who were carrying baskets handed them food wrapped in banana leaves. One of the ladies approached me and handed one to me shyly. Others that I was with while they had that 'transaction' were now surrounding the jeep eating the first decent food I had during my whole trip. I unwrapped it just like they did, inside there was rice and a roasted chicken top with a thick soy sauce .
"Look, it's been five days since you were with us Ji and we never heard you talk after that.... introduction." Brando started. Back in the truck, he's always talking non stop with everyone. He's like my father, their sanguine nature is comforting at the same time, kind of annoying.
"Don't make her, you'll just hear thrashing, cussing and mother naming words." Larry said with all the food in his mouth. I was only mumbling when I cussed in front of him, I didn't realize he'd be observant and hear those.
"Definitely like Monica." Ephraim announced, almost at once, a gun barrel was on his throat making him choke on his unchewed food.
"Oh come on Larry. No one heard." Ephraim slurred as his food spewed everywhere as he spoke.
"Damn it! Disgusting @&()!3!"
"See? tell you!" Ephraim said, cleaning himself and resumed eating. Larry choked a laugh along with everyone else. I wonder what's making them howl in laughter.
A bunch of wives and ladies were gathered together talking and looking in our direction as we ate. While the males would look at you as if you're the animal, the females on the other hand were looking as if they were the animal. I can almost imagine some bird dancing weird dances to mate the opposite sex. I lost my appetite and just waited for Larry and the others to finish. By midnight, we traveled by motorcycle. Larry was laughing as he lent me his daughter's motorcycle. Before we left, she was staring at a distance watching us prep our other all nighter trip pot. She was the one who handed me the food I was eating. He said her daughter really thought of me as a guy and he finds it funny that she's finally showing interest in a man. Only, I'm not a real one and how he wishes I was.
He knew so much about me as if he had known me all along. He knew I used to ride bikes. He knows I've been cursing him at the back of my mind when I do and would tell me to stop even without actually saying the words.
"I just know your mother so much, and you've seemed to grow up just like her." he told me once.
"Tell me Larry. What's my Mira like?" I can't help but ask him.
"Well, we grew up together. She's unpredictable, like you, but if you make time and effort, you'll know her eventually. She was feared, even by her siblings. She had a way of dealing things. She always had a good viewpoint of any circumstances. She had a way of loving that no one understands. She doesn't dislike anyone, no matter how unreasonable they seem. She's a good cook, and really unfashionable. She always wore clothes that made her a laughingstock. She wants things to be orderly. She hates everything that is not uniform or aligned. And she loves to sing." How random.
"I always thought she's a cruel mother, you see. Back when I was a kid, she would just leave me to fend for myself, to do things on my own, then I realized that's her way of making me learn. She doesn't want to be sweet and touchy, but when I'm asleep, she would cuddle me and tell me her 'I love you's'. It confuses me but I always look forward to it during bedtime and pretend I'm asleep."
"She's like that. I can't even imagine, she's gone."
The conversation is off. It's making me soft and I immediately shut Larry off altogether. They dropped me in a boarding house just in front of the public high school of the local community.
"Just stay here for a while. I can't bring you to the Ponce's just yet…. It's... They wouldn't….
I guess it's definitely going to be the hard way. I won't be able to reach out to Mira's family easily. I thought by having Larry, I could bypass all those hardways.
"I know Larry. Let's not push it. I'll try to wait."
"We need to lay low for now. You can enroll at the high school where your cousins studied. Though they rarely attend school." He told me as he arranged a room for me.
"I can do that." I told him referring to reattending school.
"Then suit yourself, I'll be sending someone to help you."
"I don't..... need anyone."
"Oh, it's not for you. I need assurance that you'll not be a headache. You're Mira's daughter after all. You are trouble." He told me, smiling as they all left. Brando said his goodbye and Ephraim simply waved as he made way to the bike I came with.
I enrolled High School just as I promised Larry he did not reappear since they dropped me off and it's been two weeks. I told the registrar that my documents will be sent by my parents soon. They took my promise and sent me to a classroom. Lenji Del Valle, that's my name for now. The school bore me, as said by Larry, my cousins rarely come to school. Boredom ate my peace so one day, after having enough, I started skipping classes. I found a bunch of dama players on the tricycle rotunda. I've been watching them for a few days now. And I've been itching to play ever since.
"You play?" An old man asked me, he had this 'good morning towel' wrapped around his head.
"I'm only familiar with the general rule after observing others play." I told him. After I said that, he bent on the ground, picked up a stick and drew a dama board, then he picked out a bunch of bottle caps on his pockets colored red and blue and started arranging them.
"You move first." he told me. I moved one bottle cap, then he did... I got defeated by my next following moves just like a thunder flash. He's an elite. Definitely or I'm just an inexperienced newbie.
"One more game?" I told him ferociously. He just huffed silently, blowing his cigarette.
I have move strategically this time. And probably on my fifth move, I finished his last remaining bottle caps.
"Ho ho! Look, this girl beat Mang Tanyo!'
"Huh? That old geezer?" Someone from behind me asked.
"But no one can ever beat him, no one even ever played with him anymore." someone said from behind him.
"One game?" The old man asked. I looked at my watch. It's already one forty-five in the afternoon.
"Maybe some other time old man, it's time for my History class….. See yaaaah!" I said as I left running from the Rotunda beside the school entrance.
I climb back from the metal rails, no one is around, the teacher is still not in the classroom when I sneak back. Though, almost half of my classmates were staring at me indifferently. My routines went like that. During no class hours, I would sneak out from the class to play billiards or play Dama with the old geezers outside the school and other tricycle drivers.