I should have expected that dealing the women in the palace without Yeon was going to be difficult as they never seemed to stop talking. But now that I had returned Yeon home to her brother and the day of our weddings getting close, I could not help but to feel a sense of panic that I had never felt before in my entire life, not even with my own father. Now that I was so close to achieving what I wanted for more than 5 years, I was starting to doubt myself due to my damned addiction that still had a hold over me. I couldn't sleep without it I had no appetite until I had my fix and I could barely look Yeon in the face as I could see that she was getting dangerously close to figuring out what was wrong with me. I had been looking after her for a good while now and I hadn't lacked in anything at all, until recently when she was still in the palace and was distracted by my plots so that I could go over to the opium den more and more. I was barely hanging onto my work because I always already so close to exiling The Third Prince myself but what about after that? Ho won earth could I possibly continue to support my wife to be and create a family when I was like this? I wanted children and I wanted them badly, but how could I possibly be a father, an even better one than my own if I couldn't even bond with them because of this situation that bitch put me in. I had been avoiding this for a very long time, but now I couldn't put off the fact that I might needed to look for her once again to look for the antidote, as what Moon-bok had been giving me was slowly becoming useless. What do I do? What can I do? There were plenty of times when our struggles almost broke us apart and I almost thought about heeding her words and leaving her alone, but then I knew that I would come to regret it…
"What are you so deep in thought about, my love?" I was so out of it that I had let my guard down for once, only to be greeted by the sight of my fiancé waiting for me in quarters in the palace where she knew that she was not supposed to be in. I was really angry and speechless at her, until I saw how she was looking at me and I had to turn my back on her, only for her to put her arms around my waist and hold onto me for dear life as if I was the only one that she had in this world. She was completely undoing me but I couldn't let her distract me, not now of all times. "Wha are you doing here? We both put in so much wrk for you to be banned from the palace, so why would you…" "We both know that I followed you here because you have stopped responding to my letters, so I came all the way here to understand why you are avoiding me so." "I am just busy and I haven't had the time to…" "Respond to me and yet you have all of the time in the world to sneak off and to whatever it is that you are doing behind my back…ever since we were housed together in The Fifth Prince's residence, isn't that right? You knew that I was there and you avoided me back then just like you are now…" "Yeon, we have been over this before; I simply have no idea what you are talking about." "Were you the one who took me to the second brothel? I knew that voice before I lost consciousness sounded familiar…." "You need to leave me alone to get back to work and…why are you carrying that dagger around with you?" "If anything were to happen for you and I would be unable to defend myself in the fallout of your plans, I will have to end my life rather than being tortured and humiliated, don't you think so?" "Don't you think that you are exaggerating a little?" "How would I know I am exaggerating anything if I have no news from you at all? But even now, I can see that I am not welcome here, so I shall just leave…" "Where to?" "The palace brothel, where else? I still need to check up on the ihwaru girls and…"
"For goodness sake, are you ever going to grow up out of that! My fiancé cannot be seen in a brothel!" "Your fiancé? Who os your fiancé? Certainly not the woman that you have been treating as a stranger for months now! But I cannot for the life of me understand why when you were the one who…" I had never lost my temper like this before, but my addiction overtook me as I found myself unintentionally grabbing Yeon by the arm and pushing her right against the wall with my hand over her mouth so that I didn't have to hear her never-ending questions anymore. Things had stopped going according to my plans lately, including her and I had no idea what to do about it. So I did the only thing that I could do in this heated situation, which I would come to regret for the rest of my life, more so that coercing her to sleep with me behind her brother's back before we had even gotten officially married.
"You know what! I am not the problem here, but you are! Hwa-Wol is on her third pregnancy and your brother's wife is on her second, but how abut you! How long have we been together and you haven't gotten pregnant even once! Why! Why is nothing working!" I could already tell that i was breaking her heart by the way she was barely breathing with my hand on top of her mouth, that is why I had to argue with my eyes closed. I could already predict that I was about to break her like I almost did with her brother all of those years ago, which is why I had to be careful with my choice of words and actions from now on, even though just the smell of her was already driving me crazy. "Seon-Ho…forgive me…." "No, since you were so anxious to go against my orders as usual, then you are not to leave these chambers of mine until you bare me a child within the month, woman!"
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This isn't what I thought would happen if I came to visit him secretly for a day or 2, this isn't even what I went through under his father's roof when I lived with him. I was now confined to his chambers and I could only have my meals with him when he decided to finally show his face to me, and I had no access to any resources in his chambers at all. He was punishing me for something, and I had no idea what it was; he was playing a game of push and pull with me and I couldn't think of why he would do this to me. His moods changed so much during our time together, but there were a host of other issues that we had to deal with together. He couldn't sleep and he started pulling all-nighters, which made him irritable to no end. His body was aways in pain and he craved the same meals over and over again to the point where he got just as bold with the servants as his father did. The situation got so out of control that I had to once again start taking care of him personally and just wait for him to become the person that he once was that I fell deeply in love with, which didn't happen until both Haw-Wol and my sister-in-law concluded their business in the palace and left, leaving me to tend to my nephew personally as well. It wasn't easy at all even though I had all of the help in the world, but he had one enough for me to just wait for things to return back to normal, even if it frustrated me that he was keeping much bigger secrets from me now. But I truly had no idea what to do if this continued to be an issue between us with no resolution in sight, along with his excessive urge of getting me pregnant every single night that I was here with him.
"Seon-Ho? Are you home now? Here, I just finished making…" Unlike his regular mood that he has been making known to me, he actually puled me into a hug for the first time in a long time. "Husband? Is everything alright with you? Is something wrong? How is The Imperial Concubine Park? Has my sister-in-law forgiven her for…" "The Imperial Concubine Park has finally made her exit with my help today, and that of your brother." "Well that is…" "Yeon, please forgive me."
This really took me aback as I had never ever heard him say these words to me before, not for anything in the world, even when he really was in the wrong about certain things that I hadn't disclosed as of yet. "We have been parted for so long and I was just so busy and I…" "Will you now give me the answers that I came for? Husband?" "I shall tell you everything once I take a break from this place upon waiting for the eventual return of The Third Prince and his men." "And when will that be?" "Very soon, but long enough for us to marry first before I return to the palace. And then…" "And then?" "Then I can take a proper break, long enough for us to have a honeymoon and start a family." "My Love, I do not understand exactly what you are saying…" "Where is my nephew? I cannot hear him playing or breaking anything as usual?" "I have just put him to sleep, but what on earth…" "I couldn't stop thinking about the both of you, so I finished up work as soon as I could to see you, but I didn't even notice how much weight you have lost until now." "My love I am fine, but what about…" "The Concubine Chung and her family are on lockdown until The Third Prince arrives back to the palace and as for my sister-in-law, she really does seem to be bonded to you, as she is just as confined to her quarters as you are here with worse treatment from the entire place for how she has treated her own son." "So now what happens?" "Sharing weals is easy, but sharing woes are rare indeed." "So who will you blame the poison onto?" "Probably The Concubine Chung, for The Widow Nam has beaten me to my plot and has been taken to the infirm for a bout of poisoning herself."
"Are you sure that you are feeling well?" "You have asked me that question quite a lot this evening, haven;'t you?" "It just that I heard that The Third Prince himself planned to borrow forces from The Chung family themselves before their concubine was the one who bought them down herself." "Were you the one who intercepted the letter? But would he really do so, putting his wealth and honour at risk?" "Well, if he really were to take the risk, then he would cease to obtain more than he already has, which goes against his nature entirely." Husband, your handwork has not gone amiss, which is why you are so close to your goal already." "Which is why we are both s close to getting our big break soon; we shall soon marry and start anew, but…" "But?" "But my behaviour for these last few days have still been inexcusable and it shall not happen again and neither will you indulge me from this moment on. And I shall place you in charge of creating a new routine for me after the wedding break." "Very well husband…." "But you still cannot escape your bedroom duties." "Very well, and here, I have made some kratom honey cakes just for you…." "Excuse me? What did you just say?" "I said that I just made some fresh honey cakes for dessert, so be careful when you pick them up…husband! I just told you to be careful!"