My life have become meaningless for me, it is a repeating sequence that I can't seem to get rid of. I am stuck in a time loop, which when I died, I come back to life in the past- when I was 18. In each of those lifetimes, I dated the same person over and over again. He is my beloved lover, Oliver. I used to think of him as the hope inside my life, but not until my 13th life. During that life, I was able to find a cure for my paralysis on the lower half of my body. But the solution is an impossible task, it was to obtain the devil's tear. Oliver becomes a cowards and convince me not to risk it on this method, promising me a better solution. But before any other solutions is found, I died once again as soon as I reach a certain age. The main cause of my death is the paralysis. First, it would only devours the lower half of my body, but as times passes, it will slowly eats out everything from toes to head. It will continue to spread, without a proper cure, I'll die from the suffocation, once my head and the entire body is paralyzed completely.
I once thought it was because of my "selfishness" to blame Oliver about his cowardliness, but after thinking about it over and over again, I knew that it wasn't my fault for trying to find a way to stay alive…
The first day of my 14th life begins, nothing out of place. My room is still warm and cozy, the bed is still soft and fluffy. Everything's feels the same, except this time, I have a plan in mind. I want to find a cure for my paralysis, i want to live a long life this time.
I jumped out of bed, sits down at my writing desk. I brings out a quill and ink, slowly writes my plan for the future. First of all, I have to remind myself, that my paralysis starts in 2 more years- when I'm 20. My death will comes when I'm 23, so 5 years from now on…I'll meet my demise. In all of my previous lifetimes, I never lived past the age of 23. But now, I know what exactly I need to cure myself.
As I'm brainstorming my ideas and plannings onto the rough paper with faint lavender's aroma, a man walks in. He is wearing a butler attire, holding a bowl of soup. His name is Ero, my personal butler. Ero acts as my big brother in every lifetimes i have lived, he is supportive and reliable, I trusted him well.
"You're up already? Why don't you come try some warm soup? I assure you-" Before Ero could finish, I interrupts him "-that's it's not too salty?" I smiles at him.
he look at me with his eye's widen "…i was about to say that…" he said, as his eyes slowly narrow back down. "But anyway, my lady. You should definitely finish it, warm soup are good for your fragility." Ero approaches me with the bowl of soup in his hand as he slowly places the bowl on my working desk. I simply smiled back at him, as I slowly consumes the hot soup within seconds.
After I'm done, Ero excuses himself and off he go. I sit there, pondering over and over again about a way to get the devil's tear. I'm a normal human being, and the person I'm supposed to seek help from is the devil. How am I going to achieves it? It is mission impossible. Even kids knew that challenging the devil is a dangerous action no one dare to take, because the result is clear- death. However, unlike other people, I have lived countless times. I'm not afraid to try, risking a lifetime is not a problem for me. Since, I might or might not be relived back again once I died this life. So it's worth a try…
Yet the problems lies so far ahead. To reach the devil's castle, I have to painstakingly cross the "hell river" to get to the other side. Going to find the devil isn't an easy task, so of course, I really need to start planning more than I originally intended. From today, my sole mission is to find the devil and get his tears- my only cure to the blockade of my life.