Early that morning, when Santichai first drifted into consciousness, the room was draped in a heavy, sterile silence. He couldn't recall his dreams, but the emptiness of the chair beside him left a dull ache in his chest. KK was gone. On the bedside table, a bag and some containers of food sat waiting, a lonely reminder of his partner's presence. He felt a wave of disappointment, though he quickly chided himself; he knew KK had to work.
Just as he was settling into that loneliness, the door creaked open. KK stepped in, looking weary but carrying a thermos and a cup like a peace offering.
As KK set the items down, he offered a small, tired smile. "How do you feel? Are you in any pain?"
"I don't feel much of anything," Santichai admitted, his voice a bit raspy.
"That's the general anesthetic still in your system, and the fentanyl they're giving you through the IV," KK explained gently. He moved with the practiced ease of someone who understood the rhythm of recovery. "Once you start on solids, they'll likely switch you to tramadol. But listen to me—don't try to be a hero. When the meds wear off, the pain will come. Tell the nurses the moment you feel a twinge, because it takes time for the pills to kick in."
He poured a cup of warm water, the steam rising between them, and slid the over-bed table closer. "You need to eat something before the meds, anyway. The nurse mentioned they'll make you pretty drowsy."
Santichai watched him, his heart softening. "Aren't you supposed to be at work today?"
"I'll head out after you've had breakfast," KK replied. "I won't be back until tomorrow night."
"Don't worry about me," Santichai insisted, reaching out to touch KK's sleeve. "The nurses are right there. I'll call them if I need anything. You shouldn't miss work just to sit here with me."
KK didn't argue. Instead, he opened a container of porridge, the savory scent filling the small space. "Doctor Lin said if everything goes well, you'll be out in a week. But you're looking at a month or more of physiotherapy." He scooped up a spoonful, blowing on it gently before holding it to Santichai's lips.
Santichai pulled back slightly, a flicker of pride surfacing. "I can eat it myself, KK."
KK paused, then nodded, setting the bowl down. "Okay. Just... let it cool for a second first." He lingered there, his eyes searching Santichai's.
"Are you going to work now?" Santichai asked again.
KK sighed, a playful yet sharp edge to his voice. "Why do you keep trying to kick me out? Is there a secret visitor coming that you don't want me to meet?"
Santichai managed a small, genuine laugh. "No. I just don't want you falling behind because of me."
"I'll be fine," KK said, leaning down. "I'm on duty tonight, so I really won't be able to check on you until tomorrow evening. Promise you'll call the station if you need anything?"
"I promise. Go," Santichai smiled.
KK leaned in and pressed a lingering kiss to Santichai's forehead. "I'm leaving. Eat your breakfast and take your medicine."
Santichai watched him go, a warm glow finally replacing the morning's chill. "Mmm-hmm."
Santichai watched KK walk out the door, his vision blurring through a thick veil of tears. He had practically pushed KK out the door, knowing he couldn't hold back this sob much longer. If KK had seen him like this, he never would have left for work; he would have stayed, hovering and worried.
But these weren't bitter tears. For the first time in his life, Santichai wept from the overwhelming weight of being cared for. In just two months, KK had given him more tenderness than Asnee had provided in ten long, lonely years.
A sharp knock at the door startled him. He wiped his eyes frantically just as Sarah stepped inside.
"Are you in pain?" she asked immediately, her doctor's intuition kicking in.
"No..." Santichai croaked, trying to find his voice.
"If you're not in pain, why are you crying?" Sarah walked to the edge of his bed, her expression softening. "Did my brother bully you?"
"No," Santichai smiled through the dampness on his cheeks. "No one is bullying me."
Sarah hesitated, then asked gently, "Do you have any family living nearby? Someone we should call?"
The question hung in the air. "I don't have any relatives," Santichai said simply.
Sarah was taken aback, a flash of regret crossing her face. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry. I didn't know."
Santichai looked at the young doctor's nervous expression and felt a surge of warmth. "It's okay. Truly, I don't mind." He picked up his spoon and began to eat the porridge, showing her he was fine.
"Well," Sarah said, regaining her professional footing. "Tomorrow, the real work starts. You need to get up slowly and try to walk."
"Thank you, Doctor Lin," Santichai said. He paused, looking at her. "KK told me you were his younger sister."
Sarah grinned at him. "Even if you weren't dating my brother—even if you were a total stranger—I'd care for you like family. I treat you no differently than my other patients, I promise."
"I still want to thank you for everything," Santichai insisted.
"The person you should really be thanking is KK," Sarah said with a wink. "A nurse will be in shortly to help you move. We'll start with five minutes and slowly increase the goal. If it hurts, tell her. If you take your medication on schedule, the pain should stay manageable."
Santichai nodded obediently, and with a final smile, Sarah left the room.
The medication eventually pulled him into a deep, dreamless sleep. He wasn't sure how much time had passed when a sharp, throbbing heat in his back jolted him awake. He knew the routine by now; the meds only lasted about four to six hours. He must have overshot his window.
He opened his eyes to call for the nurse, but the words caught in his throat. There, curled up on the small sofa beside his bed, was KK. He looked exhausted, finally surrendering to sleep. Santichai swallowed his groan of pain. He wouldn't wake him. This throbbing was nothing compared to the heartache he had endured for years. He could handle this.
When the nurse finally entered for the evening check-in, Santichai immediately pressed a finger to his lips. The nurse smiled knowingly and tiptoed toward the bed. "Mr. Kittibun," she whispered, "it's time for your evening walk."
"Can you hand me the medicine bottle from the table?" Santichai breathed.
As she handed him the pills, he braced himself. With the nurse's steadying hand, he eased himself out of bed. Every muscle in his back screamed in protest, but he moved with agonizing slowness, making sure the bed didn't creak or his feet didn't scuff. He kept his eyes on KK's sleeping face until they reached the hallway.
Once they were safely at the drinking fountain, he swallowed his pill with a grateful gulp of water.
"Mr. Kittibun," the young nurse asked, "how long would you like to try for today?"
Santichai looked down the long, sterile corridor. "Let's try for twenty minutes."
The nurse gasped softly. "Twenty? It's only your third day post-op. Are you sure you're up for that?"
"I'll let you know if I need to stop," Santichai said firmly.
The nurse let out a small, stifled laugh. "You're deciding to walk longer just so Mr. Suwannarat can sleep more, aren't you?"
Santichai didn't deny it. He just offered a small, tired smile. "Help me walk."
The nurse fastened the gait belt securely around his waist, and together they began their slow, steady trek down the busy hospital hallway.
May sat in her car, her eyes fixed on the entrance of Santichai's old apartment building. She had been staked out here for an entire week, but there hadn't been a single sign of him. Frustrated, she finally picked up her phone and dialed Asnee.
Asnee answered with his usual coldness. "Speak."
"Mr. Siriporn, the debtor hasn't been home in a week," May reported.
There was a sharp silence on the other end. "Are you sure?"
"Positive," May replied.
"Have you checked his workplace?" Asnee demanded.
"I did. They told me he no longer works there."
Asnee paused, the silence stretching out for several heavy moments. "Go and ask the building manager if his lease is still active. Call me back when you have an answer."
He hung up without waiting for a reply. A surge of anger, mingled with a hollow sense of disappointment, flooded his chest. Asnee knew he wasn't the "perfect" boyfriend Santichai had dreamed of, but in his own mind, his love for Santichai was deep and absolute.
He had spent years trying to walk a tightrope, attempting to satisfy his parents' demands while keeping Santichai's wishes in mind. But the more he tried to make everyone happy, the more the situation fractured. Eventually, he had decided the only way forward was to force Santichai to surrender to his parents' requests. In Asnee's logic, breaking Santichai's will was the only way to keep him by his side forever while finally pleasing his family.
After two restless hours of waiting, Asnee's phone finally buzzed. He snatched it up. "Speak."
"Mr. Siriporn," May said, "the manager confirmed he hasn't moved out. His belongings are all still there."
"Thank you," Asnee muttered.
He ended the call and immediately pulled up Santichai's contact info. His fingers hesitated over the screen before he typed out a message. He set the phone down on the mahogany table and let out a long, shaky sigh into the empty room.
"Chai... I miss you."