Silence filled the room as the Duke, Duchess, Seraphina, and a still-pouting Selphina stood around the War Table, which now had 30% more soup stains on it.
"You blew up the eastern guest wing," the Duke said, ticking points off on his fingers.
Selphina examined her nails.
"It was tacky."
"Evangeline learned to swear in six languages from you."
"She's a quick study!"
"You destroyed the Treasury with glitter!"
Selphina opened her mouth, then paused.
"...Okay, that one was just fun."
The Duchess slammed her hands on the table.
"Enough."
She produced a scroll that opened to the floor with a dramatic thwap. "By order of the Duke, you are hereby sentenced to... Time-Out Island."
Selphina gasped like she'd been stabbed.
"Not... the Crafting Table of Shame!"
The rowboat dropped Selphina off on an island with spotless white sands that were suspiciously cheerful, degraded only by:
A giant sign reading "REFLECTION ZONE: NO SCHEMING".
A single palm tree with extremely judgmental coconuts.
Soggy Gerard, still stitching his "I Will Not Incite Revolts" banner.
"You again?" Selphina groaned.
Soggy Gerard looked up, eyes hollow.
"They make you write lines. So. Many. Lines." He displayed his blistered fingers. "I had to use my own eyebrow hairs because I ran out of thread."
Selphina kicked over his sad little sandcastle.
"Pathetic."
A messenger from the Duchess cleared his throat. "Your, ah, rehabilitation supplies, ma'am."
He put aside:
A "Feelings Journal" with glitter glue accents.
12 bottles of non-alcoholic juice.
A therapy seagull wearing a tiny counselor's badge.
Selphina stared at the seagull. The seagull stared back.
"...I'll escape by Tuesday."
…..
The Duke slumped onto his chair.
"It's over. We've finally exiled every possible threat to the kingdom."
From the corridor came a loud crash.
The doors flew open, revealing Dante, his hair now a fully sentient noble house, waving wooden spoons like torches as he led a procession of kitchen workers.
"WE DEMAND A FOUR-DAY WORK WEEK," his locks spelled out in elaborate cursive smoke. "AND STOCK OPTIONS IN THE ROYAL CONDITIONER RESERVES."
The Duchess sighed.
"We forgot about the noodles."
The nursery was suspiciously quiet.
Whiskerton crept inside to find Evangeline sitting abovd a pile of very familiar treasures.
Selphina's cutlass now baby-sized.
The kraken's leash still dripping of salt water.
The Duke's favorite monocle with chew marks.
The cat's fur stood on end. "How—"
The baby grinned, showing off her newest word.
"MINE."
Outside, the ditch began bubbling ominously.