PAINKILLER

I just got my release papers after spending seven years in prison. You might all be wondering why I got in prison. It's that simple. I killed a man for raping me. Now, most people and the court didn't see what I did as self defence because that man was my husband. They thought me cruel and heartless to murder a man who I was supposed to love. I don't blame them because they were actually right but they did not know the full story behind my charade of a marriage. I only blame my parents for selling me off and getting me married against my will. I had just turned eighteen and I wanted to enjoy my adulthood but they ruined my plans. They got me married and I spent the other years in prison. 

I was the only child of my parents and things were not so good for us. I was willing to not go to school in order to help them hustle and provide. But they thought marrying me off would solve our financial needs. I begged and pleaded but they wouldn't listen. And after three months of marriage, I turned a murderer. 

I was willing to leave all that in the past now and start anew. But I couldn't help but wonder if my past was willing to leave me and let me start anew. One way or the other, I knew, that my past was gonna come haunt me. And I don't know if I was prepared or not yet. 

"Victoria Williams?" a female police officer asked me when I got to the counter. 

"Yes ma'am," I replied and nodded. 

I watched her fill out a book and let me sign. She gave me some new clothes and a wallet. Another police officer unlocked my handcuffs and showed me a room to change in. 

I changed quickly and observed myself in a mirror. I had changed a whole lot. All my fat was gone and was replaced by thin skin,  jutting bones and sunken eyes. The new clothes made me presentable to the world I was going to meet and that was satisfactory. I walked out the changing room to the waiting room to be greeted by a small girl who ran and hugged me. 

"Mummy," she said.

The feelings that coarsed through my body was so conflicting that it was taking me moments to get myself, to know what the fuck was happening to me.  


I had woken up with a very big satisfied smile on my face even though I had slept with the worlds craziest blue balls. Rae had been snuggled tightly into my arms, her face in the crook of my neck and I found that I would give anything in the world to wake up to sights like that everyday for a very long time.


She smelled divine and she was smiling. I felt so good, I felt like the right hand messenger of God himself.  


I remembered the night before while a smile pulled on my face at the memory. I could not help the grimace that threatened to ruin that smile.


I was so out of control even though I tried all my best to make it seem otherwise. It scared and shocked me so much to see that I could be like that after many years of practicing to detach myself from my emotions while giving sexual pleasure.


Chapter 90 - 52