In a guest room at the Tianshan Sect, Ma Jingguo opened his eyes to an unfamiliar ceiling. He sat up on the edge of the bed, his mind racing. This wasn't his room; this wasn't his home. Why was he here? Where was Mu Dishi?
As he pondered, a sharp pain shot through his left arm. He lifted his sleeve to find it neatly bandaged. Just then, four knocks came from the door.
"Come in," he called out.
A female disciple from the Jinfeng Sect entered. "Da shixiong, shifu is asking for you."
"I'll follow you once I find my xiao shushu," Ma Jingguo replied.
"Shifu asked you to come now," she insisted.
"Shimei, why would shifu want to see me?" Ma Jingguo asked.
"You'll know once you get there," the Jinfeng Sect female disciple replied.
Ma Jingguo followed her to a small meeting room. Inside, he saw Kuo Jing Song, Kuo Ju, Kuo Wenqian, Fu Yuanjun, and the ten elders of Tianshan all seated.
He sat down across from Kuo Jing Song and Kuo Ju. "Shifu. Shimu," he greeted them. Then, he turned to the ten elders. "Qianbei."
"Ah Chen, let me ask you something," Kuo Jing Song said.
"Go ahead," Ma Jingguo replied.
"Has the Jinfeng Sect mistreated you in any way?" Kuo Jing Song asked.
"No," Ma Jingguo replied. "Everyone at the Jinfeng Sect treats me very well."
"Last time you took off, and we had to cancel the wedding," Kuo Ju said angrily, standing up and slamming her hand on the table. "When Chang'er came home, she told us she didn't want to marry you anymore, so we let it go." Her voice rose with fury. "But today, inside that trap room, everyone saw what you did!"
Ma Jingguo was confused. "I haven't done anything wrong."
"How dare you still say that?" Kuo Ju retorted. "You were on top of Chang'er, kissing her! Everyone who was there saw it. You ruined her reputation. No matter what, you must marry Chang'er!"
"Shimu, I did not kiss Shijie," Ma Jingguo protested quickly. "Shijie suddenly stopped breathing, and I was trying to save her life by blowing air into her mouth."
"Your lips touched her lips," Kuo Ju shot back.
"Even though our lips touched, the meaning behind it was different," Ma Jingguo insisted, looking around the room. "If you don't believe me, ask Mu Dishi. When he came to help me, I told him Shijie wasn't breathing."
"Madam Kuo, I can vouch for that," Fu Yuanjun said, looking at Ma Jingguo. "Actually, I was the one who helped you. You had fallen unconscious and mistaken me for Mu da ge."
Ma Jingguo's heart sank. "Then, where is he?"
"He left after he cured the poison from you two," Fu Yuanjun replied.
Ma Jingguo's face turned pale. "He left..."
"We asked him what kind of poison you two had, but he didn't answer," Fu Yuanjun explained. "He quickly mixed the medicine and asked us to boil it, and then he left."
Ma Jingguo looked down at the table, his heart aching at the thought of Mu Dishi leaving him behind. Tears welled in his eyes as he spoke sadly, "It was some kind of stimulant mist. Before the white mist entered the room, Shijie and I were talking normally. Then we fainted. When we woke up, the poison took effect quickly. We became hot and removed our outer layers of clothes." He looked directly at Kuo Ju. "Shimu, I did nothing wrong. I am innocent. I will not accept your accusation." He stood up.
"Where do you think you're going?" Kuo Ju demanded.
"I'm going to look for xiao shushu," Ma Jingguo replied.
"If you dare to walk out of here, you will be kicked out of the Jinfeng Sect," Kuo Ju threatened.
Ma Jingguo turned back to face her. "I don't care. When Shijie wakes up, Shimu can confirm my story with her." He then walked out of the room.
"Let us wait for Miss Kuo to wake up," Elder Tong suggested.
"For as long as I've known Ma gongzi, he is not the type of person who would take advantage of others," Fu Yuanjun added.
Kuo Jing Song looked at his wife. "Ju'er, let's wait for Chang'er to wake up."
Ma Jingguo ran down the mountain path, his heart pounding faster as he neared his home. He needed to know if Mu Dishi had truly left Tianshan and was heading south. He entered the house, searching their shared bedroom first, but Mu Dishi wasn't there. He checked the guest room, and then searched the entire house twice, but found nothing.
He walked back into their bedroom, took Mu Dishi's pillow, and pressed it to his face, inhaling his scent. He curled into a fetal position, clutching the pillow tightly. He didn't know when he started crying, but by the time he realized he was, the pillow was already soaked with his tears.
Ma Jingguo knew that Mu Dishi had seen him give Kuo Changchang breath with his own eyes. Mu Dishi must be thinking the same thing as everyone else in that room.
Since he was ten years old, Ma Jingguo had always pursued Mu Dishi. He loved Mu Dishi with his whole heart, but did Mu Dishi feel the same way? Everyone he loved and everyone who had loved him had disappeared one by one. He wanted to chase after Mu Dishi, but what if that wasn't what Mu Dishi wanted? Even if he stood in front of a ten-thousand-pound door, Mu Dishi wouldn't open it if he didn't want to see him.
Mu Dishi had left him again. This time, he would never see him again because Mu Dishi left with the thought that something had happened between him and Kuo Changchang. In the past, each time Mu Dishi left, he would tell himself there would be a next time. But this time, he knew Mu Dishi would never come back to him. Even if he found Mu Dishi, he knew exactly what Mu Dishi would say: he would tell him to go back to the Jinfeng Sect and marry Kuo Changchang because it was his responsibility for ruining her reputation.
Ma Jingguo was exhausted, physically and emotionally. He knew he had put all his effort into his relationship with Mu Dishi, and now he had nothing left to give. He was tired of living, knowing he would never see Mu Dishi again, and decided to lie in bed and let himself die.
"Xiao shushu, I'm so tired," he sighed deeply.
He woke up late in the evening, having cried himself to sleep without even realizing when he had pulled the blanket over himself. Instead of the soft, familiar sound of Mu Dishi's breathing next to him, he heard only the chirping of crickets outside. Then, a loud, jarring sound, like a cup or plate shattering, came from the kitchen.
It must be a thief, he thought. He didn't care. He was waiting to die anyway; if a thief came in and killed him, it would save him the days of starving to death. He heard the thief pacing back and forth, but only in the kitchen. Must be a hungry thief, he concluded. He tried to focus on his thoughts of Mu Dishi, but then another loud crash, this time of a falling pot, made him jump.
Annoyed, Ma Jingguo was tired of the thief ruining his thoughts of Mu Dishi. He walked to the window, pushed the panel open, and yelled, "You thief, what the hell! Can't you rob me quietly? The next sound I hear from you, I swear I'll come out and kick you!" He dropped the window panel shut.
As he turned to walk back to his bed, he thought he heard Mu Dishi's soft voice apologize. Ma Jingguo stopped, his heart pounding, and ran out of the room toward the kitchen.
When he reached the kitchen, he saw what he thought was Mu Dishi's back as he was cooking. He rubbed his eyes several times, but Mu Dishi was still there. He even pinched himself four times before he decided to speak.
"Xiao shushu?" Ma Jingguo's voice trembled.
Mu Dishi turned, glanced at him, and then returned to cooking. "We can eat in a bit," he said.
Tears streamed down Ma Jingguo's face. He tried to wipe them away, but the more he wiped, the more they fell. He walked to the other side of the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Mu Dishi's slender waist.
"Let go of me. I'm still cooking," Mu Dishi said coldly.
Ma Jingguo refused to release him. "Xiao shushu, where have you been? I was waiting for you all day long."
Mu Dishi struggled. "Let go of me. Go wash your hands and sit at the table."
After Ma Jingguo washed his hands, Mu Dishi brought out two plates of food and placed them on the table. He sat across from Ma Jingguo, and the two began to eat.
"Xiao shushu, where have you been?" Ma Jingguo asked.
"I went back to the Yueguang branch. When I got there, the entire branch had fled, leaving nothing behind."
Ma Jingguo watched as Mu Dishi ate, mesmerized. "What were you looking for, Xiao shushu?"
"I noticed that their traps looked somewhat familiar," Mu Dishi replied. He then looked at Ma Jingguo. "Wash your feet before you go back to bed."
Ma Jingguo looked down and realized he was barefoot. He'd been so excited to see Mu Dishi that he hadn't even noticed he wasn't wearing his shoes or socks. He hadn't felt the cold until Mu Dishi mentioned it.
After dinner, the two men lay in bed. Ma Jingguo held Mu Dishi in his arms, kissing the back of his head. "Xiao shushu, when Fu Yuanjun told me you had left, I thought you had abandoned me again." He turned to face Mu Dishi, kissing his forehead. "Xiao shushu, believe me, nothing happened between Changchang Shijie and me. She was unconscious from the poison and wasn't breathing. I remembered you taught me that if someone is unresponsive and not breathing, we could give them air through their mouth."
"Forget it," Mu Dishi said.
"Xiao shushu, I'm innocent," Ma Jingguo insisted. "I haven't done anything that would hurt you. I can't do anything that would hurt you because I don't want to lose you." He kissed Mu Dishi again. "I only want to do those things with you. Xiao shushu, do you believe I'm innocent?"
"Mm," Mu Dishi murmured.
Still unconvinced, Ma Jingguo questioned, "Really?"
"I saw the knife cuts on your left arm," Mu Dishi replied.
"It couldn't be helped," Ma Jingguo said. "When I cut myself, I concentrate on the pain instead of longing for intimacy."
"I know," Mu Dishi said.
Ma Jingguo kissed Mu Dishi's lips and whispered softly, "Xiao shushu, right now, I only want to concentrate on my desire to be intimate with you." He sent his tongue into Mu Dishi's mouth as his hand moved lower, toward Mu Dishi's member. "How I wish the person in that trap room had been you."