Once I successfully abandoned Xiaofan near our makeshift campsite—under the guise of "heroically foraging for supplies," of course—I wandered into the depths of the forest.
I managed to scrounge up enough dry wood to build a small bonfire and found a few of those Golden Sun-Drop Fruits I mentioned earlier.
With the chores done, I felt absolutely filthy. I hadn't bathed since I transmigrated into this world, and let me tell you, "adventure" smells a lot like unwashed socks and desperation.
I stumbled upon a quiet, crystal-clear bend in the river. I scanned the area for lurking tigers, bandits, or judgmental gods. Seeing none, I stripped off my tattered, rag-like clothes and waded into the water.
I scrubbed the grit off my skin and dunked my clothes in the river, beating them against a rock until they were, if not clean, at least *less* offensive to the nostrils. I hung them on a nearby branch and turned my attention to the actual bath.
I waded waist-deep, letting the current wash away the grime.
I looked down at the surface of the water, which acted like a perfect, high-definition mirror.
*Wait. Hold on.*
I froze. I leaned closer. I splashed some water on my face, wiped my eyes, and looked again.
*Is that... me?*
**[Ding! Host! The higher-ups are calling for an emergency maintenance check. I have no idea when I'll be back, so if you need something, just read the manual in the System program! Good luck, Host! Byeeee!]**
"Wait! System!! Get back here, you glorified toaster! How do I open the manual?! System?!"
The silence of the forest was my only answer. The blue holographic interface, usually hovering in the corner of my vision like a pesky mosquito, had vanished.
I was officially alone. And I was officially having an existential crisis.
=====°°°°°
The Feminine Tragedy
I looked back down at the reflection in the water, and I felt a deep, profound urge to scream.
No wonder the thugs in the market had looked at me so strangely!
No wonder the "Young Master" had viewed me with such weird, complex disgust!
I wasn't just "scrawny." I was a walking, breathing, bishōnen-tier catastrophe.
I had dark blue hair—the kind that looked black in the dim forest light but shimmered with a rich, midnight-ocean hue the moment a stray sunbeam hit it. It was, quite frankly, annoyingly silky.
I had big, doughy eyes that looked perpetually on the verge of weeping, framed by eyelashes so long and thick that any girl in my previous life would have killed to get them via a painful, three-hour salon session.
My nose was small, straight, and irritatingly cute. My cheeks had a natural, rosy, blush-like tint, and my lips... well, they were red, cherry-colored, and moist.
My body was slender, smooth, and lacked a single stray hair. Not on my chest, not on my arms—not *anywhere*.
I looked less like a hardened survivor of a cultivation world and more like a dainty, high-class doll that had been left out in the rain.
*I look like a bully magnet,* I thought, sinking deeper into the water until only my eyes were visible.
*I don't look like a hero. I look like the delicate protagonist of a romance novel who gets trapped in a harem!*
If any girl saw me right now, they wouldn't want to date me—they'd be blinded by pure, unadulterated jealousy. Or they'd try to dress me up in frilly clothes. Both options sounded like a nightmare.
*Why, Creator? Why? Did you have a leftover 'Beautiful Maiden' character model and just slapped 'Male' on the documentation?!*
**[A/N: I know a certain someone who would absolutely love to ravage that body... hihihi.]**
I shivered, shaking the water out of my silky blue hair. "Shut up, author! Keep your creepy shipping thoughts to yourself!"
I climbed out of the water, shivering in the breeze. I pulled on my damp rags, grabbed my pile of wood and fruit, and trudged back toward the camp. If anyone asked, I'd tell them I fell into a vat of "masculinity serum" and it didn't work.
=====°°°°°
Meanwhile, in the Void...
High above the mortal plane, in a space that defied geography, System 888 was vibrating with digital nerves.
"System 888 reporting to the Boss," it chirped, its voice devoid of its usual cheeriness.
A shadow loomed over the terminal. The Boss, a figure of immense and terrifying presence, looked down at the floating orb of code.
"Is he doing great, System 888?"
"Yes, Boss! He's survived, he's acquired a sidekick, and he's currently heading directly into the path of the primary antagonist."
The Boss let out a breath that sounded like a galaxy collapsing.
"Good. You don't need to go back just yet. I need you to do one more thing for me."
"What is it, Boss?"
The Boss held out a scroll. It wasn't made of paper; it was made of woven starlight and tears.
"Deliver this letter to him. Personally."
"Okay, Boss!"
System 888 grabbed the scroll and vanished into the slipstream of reality.
Back in the command center, the Boss turned away, his shoulders shaking.
"I hope this time... everything will be a success. Please, just let him live."
A heavy, painful, and deeply sorrowful cry echoed through the chamber—a sound of a thousand broken dreams.
**[A/N: Who could it be? The mysterious Boss, the sorrowful cry, the letter of destiny? Let me know your best theories in the comments! Is it a previous life? A lost love? A transmigrator who failed before? The plot thickens!]**
=====°°°°°
Back to Reality (or lack thereof)
I trudged back to the riverbank, the wood bundle digging into my shoulder.
I pushed through a thicket of ferns, expecting to see Xiaofan sitting by the fire.
Instead, I found the campfire blazing bright, but the clearing was empty.
My pulse jumped. *Xiaofan?*
I dropped the wood. A piece of parchment was stuck into the ground near the fire. It wasn't a standard note; the paper shimmered with a faint, iridescent glow.
I picked it up. There was no sender's name. Just a single, elegant sentence written in ink that seemed to pulse like a heartbeat:
*"The path you walk is not the one you were written for. Keep running, little bluebird. The cage door is open."*
I stared at the note, my heart hammering against my ribs. "What the hell does that mean? System? Are you there? Is this one of your sick pranks?"
Silence.
I looked north. The woods were dark and imposing. I had a fourteen-year-old spy girl missing, a cryptic letter that sounded like it came from a poetic stalker, and a face that was apparently a global treasure.
"Great," I muttered to the trees.
"Just great. I didn't sign up for a 'Deep Lore Mystery.' I just wanted to survive the tutorial level."
I took a deep breath, grabbed a Golden Sun-Drop Fruit, and started walking toward the north. If the cage door was open, I might as well see what was on the other side.
And if anyone tried to stop me? Well, I'd just have to see how fast my "feminine" legs could really go.