Ash Ketchum was having a weird year.
It had started normally enough. He'd woken up late on his tenth birthday, rushed to Professor Oak's laboratory, and arrived to find... chaos.
Complete, absolute, reality-bending chaos.
A Wailord on the roof. Legendaries in the sky. And a kid his age standing in the middle of it all, surrounded by more Pokemon than Ash had ever seen in his life.
That had been three months ago.
Since then, Ash had been trying—TRYING—to have a normal Pokemon journey.
It was not going well.
VIRIDIAN FOREST - PRESENT DAY
"Pikachu, use Thundershock!"
Ash's faithful partner unleashed a bolt of electricity at the wild Caterpie.
The Caterpie fainted.
"Yeah! Great job, Pikachu!"
"Pika!"
Ash pulled out a Pokeball, ready to make his capture—
A shadow passed overhead.
Ash looked up.
A Rayquaza was flying by, casual as anything, heading in the general direction of Pallet Town.
"That's the third one today," Ash muttered.
"Pika pika," Pikachu agreed, sounding exhausted.
The Caterpie, which had regained consciousness during the distraction, took the opportunity to flee.
"HEY! Come back!"
It did not come back.
This was Ash's life now.
Every time he tried to do something—catch a Pokemon, train, have a battle—something MARCUS-related would interrupt.
A flock of Dragonites migrating overhead.
A Mewtwo teleporting past.
Once, an ENTIRE HERD of Tauros had stampeded through his campsite because they were "heading to Pokemon Paradise for the weekend."
"It's not FAIR," Ash complained to Pikachu. "I'm supposed to be the protagonist! I'm supposed to have the special journey!"
"Pika," Pikachu said sympathetically.
"But every time I do ANYTHING, people just ask about Marcus! 'Oh, are you friends with the Shuckle kid?' 'Did you see the Charizard that soloed the Elite Four?' 'Is it true he has TWELVE Arceus?'"
"Pika pika."
"I don't even know what an Arceus IS, Pikachu!"
Ash had managed to collect three badges so far.
This would normally be respectable progress for a new trainer.
But Marcus had become Champion in the time it took Ash to beat Brock.
CHAMPION.
With a CHARIZARD SOLO RUN.
"How am I supposed to compete with that?" Ash asked the universe.
The universe did not respond.
A Mew floated past, giggling.
"Was that a MEW?!"
The Mew was gone before Ash could react.
"PIKACHU, DID YOU SEE THAT?!"
"...Pika."
"THAT WAS A MEW! A LEGENDARY POKEMON! AND IT JUST—IT JUST FLEW BY LIKE IT WAS NOTHING!"
Ash sat down heavily on a log.
"This region is WEIRD now."
MEANWHILE - PEWTER CITY
Gary Oak was also having a weird year.
But unlike Ash, Gary had adapted.
"You see," Gary explained to his cheerleading squad (yes, he still had one), "the key to success in the modern Pokemon landscape is DIFFERENTIATION."
"Wow, Gary!"
"So smart, Gary!"
"Tell us more, Gary!"
Gary flipped his hair smugly. "Marcus Chen has power. Raw, overwhelming, ridiculous power. But what does he NOT have?"
"Humility?" one cheerleader guessed.
"Fashion sense?" another offered.
"STYLE!" Gary declared. "He has no STYLE! He just throws overpowered Pokemon at problems until they go away!"
"But... doesn't that work?"
"That's not the POINT! Anyone can win with a Mewtwo! It takes SKILL to win with normal Pokemon!"
Gary's Eevee nodded in agreement from his shoulder.
"So while Marcus is off being Champion or whatever, I'M going to become the most STYLISH trainer in Kanto! The one people ACTUALLY want to watch!"
"YEAH GARY!"
"GO GARY!"
"WE BELIEVE IN YOU GARY!"
Gary basked in the adulation.
He had four badges now. One more than Ash.
That was something, at least.
CERULEAN CITY - POKEMON CENTER
Ash and Gary ran into each other completely by accident.
"Well, well, well," Gary said, smirking. "If it isn't Ash Ketchum. How many badges do you have now? Two?"
"THREE!" Ash protested. "I have three!"
"Oh, only THREE? I have FOUR."
"Yeah, well, I—"
"And how many Pokemon do you have? Six? Seven?"
"...Twelve."
"Twelve! Wow! That's almost ONE PERCENT of what Marcus has!"
Ash's eye twitched.
"Don't compare me to Marcus."
"Why not? Scared?"
"I'm not SCARED. I'm just... it's not FAIR to compare anyone to Marcus! The guy has LEGENDARIES!"
"Excuses, excuses." Gary waved dismissively. "A REAL Pokemon Master wouldn't make excuses."
"Oh yeah?! Well at least I don't need a CHEERLEADING SQUAD to feel good about myself!"
"They're SUPPORTIVE!"
"They're WEIRD!"
The cheerleaders gasped in offense.
Pikachu and Eevee exchanged looks that said, "Our trainers are idiots."
The argument was interrupted by a commotion outside.
"What's going on?" Ash pushed through the crowd to see—
A parade.
An actual PARADE.
And at the center of it, riding on a Dragonite, waving to the crowd—
Marcus Chen.
Champion of Kanto.
Surrounded by his ridiculous collection of Pokemon.
"IS THAT A SHUCKLE ON HIS HEAD?!" someone in the crowd screamed.
"IT'S KENNETH! THE KENNETH!"
"I LOVE YOU KENNETH!"
Kenneth, sitting on Marcus's head like a living hat, vibrated slightly.
The crowd went WILD.
Ash and Gary watched in stunned silence.
"He has a parade," Ash said flatly.
"A whole parade," Gary agreed.
"For becoming Champion."
"Which he did with one Charizard."
"One Charizard that beat the ENTIRE Elite Four."
"And Lance."
"And LANCE."
They stood there, watching the parade pass, watching the crowd cheer, watching Marcus wave like he wasn't the most absurdly overpowered trainer in history.
"I hate him," Gary said.
"Same."
"I mean, I don't ACTUALLY hate him. He seems nice."
"Annoyingly nice."
"But I hate EVERYTHING about this situation."
"Same."
Pikachu and Eevee nodded in agreement.
LATER THAT DAY - CERULEAN POKEMON CENTER CAFETERIA
Ash and Gary ended up eating lunch together, united in their shared misery.
"So what's your plan?" Ash asked, poking at his food.
"Get all eight badges. Challenge the League. Become Champion."
"But Marcus is already Champion."
"Then I'll beat Marcus and BECOME Champion."
Ash stared at him. "Gary, he has a MEWTWO."
"So?"
"And forty other Legendaries."
"Details."
"And a Shuckle that made BROCK cry."
"I'll figure something out!" Gary snapped. "What about YOU? What's YOUR plan?"
Ash thought about it.
"Same, I guess. Get badges. Challenge League. Try not to think about the fact that nothing I do will ever compare to a guy who literally broke reality on his first day as a trainer."
"That's depressing."
"YOU asked."
They ate in silence for a moment.
"You know what the worst part is?" Ash said eventually.
"What?"
"He's actually NICE. I met him after the... incident. He apologized for the chaos. Offered to help me train. Even gave Pikachu some tips from his SEVENTEEN Pikachus."
"That IS the worst part," Gary agreed. "If he was a jerk, we could hate him properly. But he's just... a guy who loves Pokemon."
"A guy with FIVE THOUSAND Pokemon."
"That's a lot of love."
"Too much love. Unreasonable amounts of love."
Pikachu made a comment that roughly translated to "I'd take seventeen siblings if they could teach me to be that strong."
"Traitor," Ash muttered.
THAT EVENING - CERULEAN CAPE
The parade had ended, and the city had returned to relative normalcy.
Ash sat on the cape, staring out at the ocean, Pikachu on his shoulder.
He was supposed to be the hero. The protagonist. The kid who came from nothing and became the very best.
But how could he be the very best when someone else had already caught them all?
Literally. ALL of them.
"Maybe I should just go home," Ash murmured.
"Pika?"
"I mean, what's the point? No matter how hard I try, I'll never have what Marcus has. The Pokemon. The power. The... the everything."
"Pika pika." Pikachu's voice was firm.
"What do you mean?"
Pikachu pointed at Ash's chest. Then at itself. Then made a heart shape with its tiny paws.
"You're saying... the bond matters more than the power?"
"PIKA!"
Ash thought about it.
Marcus had thousands of Pokemon. But Ash had Pikachu. HIS Pikachu. The Pikachu that had shocked him on day one. The Pikachu that had saved him from those Spearow. The Pikachu that was his PARTNER.
"You're right, buddy." Ash smiled. "I don't need to be Marcus. I just need to be ME."
"Pika!"
"We'll get stronger together. We'll face challenges together. And maybe we won't become Champion, but we'll have adventures!"
"PIKA PIKA!"
"And THAT'S what being a Pokemon trainer is about!"
Ash jumped to his feet, renewed determination in his eyes.
"Come on, Pikachu! Let's go train! We've got a journey to continue!"
"PIKACHU!"
They ran off toward the Pokemon Center, ready to face the future.
Behind them, unnoticed, a certain Mewtwo observed from the shadows.
"Interesting," Steve telepathed to himself. "The other child has potential. Marcus would be pleased."
Steve vanished, off to report his observations to a trainer who genuinely wanted to see everyone succeed.
PALLET TOWN - POKEMON PARADISE
Marcus, freshly returned from his Champion parade, was reviewing applications.
Yes, APPLICATIONS.
It turned out that when you had 4,847 Pokemon and a sprawling paradise to house them, you needed STAFF.
"Let's see... Ranger applications... researcher applications... someone who wants to be 'Official Magikarp Motivator'... wait, that's actually useful, accepted."
"You're building an empire," Steve observed.
"I'm building a HOME. There's a difference."
"You have administrative staff. Researchers. Rangers. A rotating team of Nurse Joys. That's an empire."
"It's a COMMUNITY."
"A community with its own economy based on Pay Day spam."
"Sustainable economics!"
Steve sighed internally.
Marcus looked up from his paperwork. "Hey, did you observe Ash today?"
"I did. He was having an existential crisis about your existence."
"Oh no. Is he okay?"
"He recovered. His Pikachu gave him a motivational speech. He seems determined to continue his journey."
"Good! I should help him train sometime."
"You offered that before. He seemed uncomfortable."
"I'll offer again! Everyone deserves support!"
"You cannot personally mentor every trainer in Kanto."
"Watch me."
Steve was beginning to realize that Marcus's greatest power wasn't his Pokemon.
It was his AGGRESSIVE FRIENDLINESS.
GARY'S CAMP - THAT NIGHT
Gary sat by his campfire, Eevee in his lap, thinking.
The cheerleaders had gone home for the week. It was just him and his Pokemon now.
"Maybe I've been doing this wrong," he murmured.
Eevee looked up curiously.
"I've been so focused on being BETTER than everyone else. Being smarter. Being cooler. Being more stylish."
Eevee nodded.
"But Marcus... Marcus doesn't care about being better. He just cares about his Pokemon. And somehow that makes him the strongest trainer in the region."
Gary pulled out his Pokedex, scrolling through his captured Pokemon.
Eevee. Pidgeot. Nidoking. Arcanine. Exeggutor. Blastoise.
Six Pokemon. His team. His PARTNERS.
"I've been treating you guys like tools," Gary realized. "Like accessories to make me look good."
Eevee made a sound that roughly translated to "Yeah, kinda."
"I'm sorry."
Eevee blinked in surprise.
"From now on, we're going to do things differently. We're going to be a TEAM. Like Ash and Pikachu. Like Marcus and... well, everyone."
Gary stood up, looking at the stars.
"I'm still going to become Champion. I'm still going to be the best. But I'm going to do it the RIGHT way."
Eevee yipped happily.
"Now let's get some sleep. Tomorrow, we start training for REAL."
SOMEWHERE IN KANTO - TEAM ROCKET REMNANTS
Jessie, James, and Meowth huddled around a tiny campfire, having been thoroughly abandoned by Team Rocket's evacuation.
"I can't believe da Boss just LEFT us," Meowth complained.
"To be fair, we were on a 'special assignment' when the evacuation happened," James pointed out. "He probably forgot we existed."
"How do you FORGET about your best agents?!"
"Are we his best agents?" Jessie asked. "We've never actually succeeded at anything."
"We're his most PERSISTENT agents!"
"That's not the same thing."
They sat in depressed silence.
"So what do we do now?" James asked.
"We could... go straight?" Jessie suggested weakly.
"Us? STRAIGHT?"
"It was just an idea!"
"We've been criminals our entire adult lives!"
"Well, crime doesn't seem to be WORKING!"
Meowth considered their options. "What if... what if we tried to work for da twerp?"
Jessie and James stared at him.
"Which twerp?" Jessie asked.
"Da one wit all da Pokemon! Marcus! He's got a whole PARADISE now! Maybe he needs workers!"
"We tried to steal Pokemon our entire careers. Why would he hire US?"
"Because we're... uh... experienced wit Pokemon?"
They thought about it.
"That's the dumbest idea you've ever had," Jessie said.
"Definitely the dumbest," James agreed.
"But somehow also the best option we have."
"Unfortunately yes."
They sighed in unison.
"To Pokemon Paradise?" Meowth asked.
"To Pokemon Paradise."
THE NEXT MORNING - POKEMON PARADISE ENTRANCE
Jessie, James, and Meowth stood at the entrance to Marcus's sprawling Pokemon sanctuary, clutching hastily-prepared resumes.
"Remember," Jessie whispered, "we're NOT Team Rocket anymore. We're just... three individuals with extensive Pokemon experience."
"Right," James agreed. "Totally legitimate job seekers."
"Who definitely never tried to steal anyone's Pokemon."
"Never even CONSIDERED it."
"Meowth, put away the net."
"Oh, right."
They approached the welcome desk, which was staffed by a Blissey and, inexplicably, an Alakazam.
The Alakazam's eyes glowed briefly.
"Your resume indicates extensive experience with 'Pokemon acquisition.' Could you clarify?"
"We... caught a lot of Pokemon," Jessie said carefully. "For ourselves. As trainers. Normal trainers."
"I see. And your reference, 'Giovanni—DO NOT CONTACT'?"
"Former employer. Left on... neutral terms."
"The psychic screening indicates you are former members of Team Rocket."
Jessie, James, and Meowth went pale.
"However," the Alakazam continued, "the screening ALSO indicates genuine desire for reformation and no current criminal intent."
"We're broke and desperate!" Meowth blurted out.
"MEOWTH!"
"That is also evident." The Alakazam paused. "Marcus Chen has a policy of offering second chances. You are hired on a probationary basis."
"We're... hired?" James blinked.
"You will be working in sanitation. Specifically, Snorlax sanitation."
They considered asking what that meant.
They decided they didn't want to know.
"We accept," Jessie said quickly.
"Excellent. Welcome to Pokemon Paradise. Please do not steal anything. Steve is always watching."
On cue, a Mewtwo materialized behind them, staring with unsettling intensity.
"We won't steal anything!" all three squeaked in unison.
"Good," Steve telepathed. "I would hate to have to erase your consciousness."
"VERY good behavior! Best behavior!"
Steve vanished.
"I think I made a mistake," Meowth whispered.
"Too late now," Jessie replied. "We're EMPLOYED."
ONE WEEK LATER
Jessie, James, and Meowth had settled into their new lives with surprising ease.
Snorlax sanitation was... exactly as unpleasant as it sounded. But it was HONEST work. And they got three meals a day, a place to sleep, and nobody was trying to arrest them.
"You know," James said one evening, "this isn't so bad."
"Don't jinx it," Jessie muttered.
"I'm just saying! We have jobs! Stability! A FUTURE!"
"We shovel Snorlax droppings for a living."
"It's a LIVING!"
Meowth, who had been adopted by the Meowth population of Pokemon Paradise (there were forty-seven of them), wandered over.
"Guys, you won't believe dis. Da other Meowths taught me a new technique! Watch!"
He used Pay Day.
Coins rained down.
"I CAN MAKE MONEY JUST BY EXISTING!"
Jessie and James stared at the coins.
"Why didn't you do this BEFORE?!" Jessie shrieked.
"I didn't know I COULD!"
"WE WERE CRIMINALS BECAUSE WE WERE BROKE!"
"IN FAIRNESS, I was also bad at being a Meowth!"
James started laughing. Then Jessie. Then Meowth.
They laughed until they cried.
"We're idiots," Jessie finally said.
"Complete idiots," James agreed.
"But at least we're REFORMED idiots now."
"Dat's character growth!"
CURRENT STATUS:
Ash Ketchum:
Badges: 3 Existential Crisis: Resolved Determination Level: Renewed Pikachu Motivation: Maximum
Gary Oak:
Badges: 4Character Development: In Progress Cheerleader Dependency: Decreasing Pokemon Bond: Improving
Team Rocket Trio:
Employment Status: Gainfully Employed Criminal Activity: None (surprisingly)Snorlax Sanitation Expertise: Growing Pay Day Discovery: Life-Changing
Marcus Chen:
Still Champion Still Aggressively Friendly Still Building An Accidental EmpireS till Completely Unaware He's The Cause Of Everyone's Existential Crises
Kenneth:
Still Vibing
[A/N: CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT FOR EVERYONE! Even the comedic villains! Next chapter: Marcus decides to visit other regions and spread his particular brand of chaos internationally! How will Johto react to a trainer with 4,847 Pokemon? VERY POORLY! Leave a comment about which side character you want to see more of!]